Tonga Bob
Getting warmer
- Oct 26, 2013
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- SFFC, LFC, ADO, CI Warriors
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Hi everyone.
I hope you've all had a great time away from this place, and that you managed to celebrate the silly season in the manner of your choosing. Whether it was a White Christmas, a Happy Hanukkah, a [INSERT CELEBRATION THAT'S APPROPRIATE FOR YOU] or a Festivus for the rest of us, I hope that you enjoyed yourself.
After a Sweet FA season that was simultaneously short and long the Warriors took some time to recharge, rejoice, reflect and reconnect. Here's a few of the highlights...
TheInjuryFactory spent some time with the family down South before tackling some DIY jobs around the place. In particular he upgraded his trophy cabinet as his old one was buckling from all of the accolades he's collected. He also spent a bit of time with Freofalcon up at Gwelup Croatia Soccer Club watching the World Cup in the wee hours of the night.
On the other side of town, Agent93 picked up some decent West Coast IPA from Piggy Smalls before cranking the air con right up so it felt like winter and watched his beloved Toronto Maple Leafs rise to second in the NHL Atlantic Division.
Speaking of winter, SBYM has been freezing his arse off over in jolly England. He's been keeping warm by calling spudmaster whose spicy language is enough to thaw anything out.
Back in Australia, Dinsdale went to town to stock up on kviek yeast as he ran out while making a Christmasbraü. He had the in-laws come over and they drank him dry.
After receiving the best Christmas sweater ever, FootyGuy13 did a bunch of work on his spreadsheets before getting to the MCG for the Boxing Day Test. There was a bit of drama though while getting into the MCC area. Some bloke with a mustache named Andrich Nortje pushed past him then swore at him in Afrikaans. Guy got pissed off so he got Mofra (who was there impersonating Kerry O'Keefe) to sneak him into the TV broadcast control centre and have a go at piloting the Spidercam, and hit Nortje good with cricket's version of the Hubble telescope.
toxic spent the time indoors wishing the weather was better, The Half Back went down the coast and sat in a rubber tube off the coast of Lorne, TubbsFarquhar and Purple7x08_24 listened to a whole lot of music, Snuffaluphagus has started writing his autobiography for the fifth time, Cesoir was complaining about the humidity, Moo spent the time under a tree, Frankston Rover spent the time burrowing, while Ambrose Burnside Mesc & WaywardSonSon considered going for a swim at Cottesloe beach however the presence of the Noahs put them off so went to AdventureWorld instead. Raveneyes spent the time on the couch ignoring his family, Reginald Perrin napped three times daily, Lord_Flashheart got one of those golden passes that gets you into the Gold Coast theme parks as much as you want for Christmas so we haven't seen him in a month. And we haven't seen much of FurTheWin BEEG Volbeat Stronzo or Smoooothy so they must have take extra time off.
You may be thinking at this point "What did Bob get up to?" Either that or "Get to the bloody point, Bob!" Well to cover both of those things off, I managed to get back to my Pacific paradise home and spent some time with my family, because for a lot of us this time of the year is all about family. And speaking of family, I caught up with my cousin from another island CursingFijian and boy did we have a ball. We drank a skinful of kava, played music on the beach with Uncle Jake and and pig cooked in the umu until it came out of our ears. Man, there's no Christmas like an Islander Christmas!
So one night over Christmas CursingFijian was talking about the premiership he just won with the Baghdad Bombers, and when the family asked where I premiership was I told them that I've won a State of Origin title but no premiership. The family laughed and laughed, until Uncle Jake suggested that CursingFijian go and help to get my own premiership. "You leave them camels alone boy and you help your cousin out. Blood is thicker than water hey" he said. I said that kava is thicker than blood, we all laughed and the deal was done. I hastily drew up the contract and before he could sober up the premiership player and season 33 All-Sweet FA ruckman became a Warrior!
So that leaves one final Warrior, pantskyle. He also had an eventful Christmas, spending the day with his family. They do the full on Christmas lunch with a burgeoning table full of food including all of the usual suspects. pantskyle almost swallowed a 50 cent coin that was hidden inside his Christmas pudding but thankfully spat it back out before it could do any damage. The coin that is, not the pudding.
Something else they do is a Kris Kringle and this year he had drawn the name of his brother to get a present for. No not Zeppo the lesser-known third brother, but The Filth Wizard who is notoriously hard to buy for. I mean, what do you get for the man that has virtually everything there is to get in a 342-game career? He has two premierships, two beez trophies, a Fred medal, fourteen (14) All-Sweet FA guernseys, Hall of Fame induction, league administratorship and probably a thousand other awards over a glittering career. But then pantskyle remembered back to seasons 21 and 22 when he and The Filth Wizard played together for the East Side Hawks, how much joy it gave them and how much they terrorised the rest of the competition. So with the feeling of nostalgia in his heart, the glint of Christmas lights in his eye and the whiff of brandy-infused eggnog on his breath he reached under the Christmas tree, pulled out a present and handed it to his equally nostalgic/reflective/intoxicated brother. The Filth Wizard pulled open the wrapping paper and, instead of finding one of pantskyle's awards which would complete the set, found a jumper. Not a knitted Christmas jumper, although it did have a tree on it. It was a Coney Island Warriors jumper.
The Filth Wizard was initially shocked. "What the heck is this? Why are you giving me a Warriors guernsey?" he said.
pantskyle, in a gesture so wonderful that if it were a film then James Stewart would play the leading role, replied "It's not just the guernsey I'm giving you. Brother, I'm giving myself to you. It's time we were reunited and played on the same team. They hugged and cried, and in that embrace The Filth Wizard said "Well you could come and play with me at Gold City" and they laughed and laughed and laughed some more.
Once I returned to Van Cortlandt Park pantskyle brought The Filth Wizard into the office and, before he could return his present, he signed on the dotted line to become a Warrior, just like his brother. A true Festivus miracle!!!!
So ladies and gentlemen, please join me in welcoming to the Coney Island Warriors an absolute icon of the league and one of Sweet's up and coming superstars - The Filth Wizard and CursingFijian!!!
I hope you've all had a great time away from this place, and that you managed to celebrate the silly season in the manner of your choosing. Whether it was a White Christmas, a Happy Hanukkah, a [INSERT CELEBRATION THAT'S APPROPRIATE FOR YOU] or a Festivus for the rest of us, I hope that you enjoyed yourself.
After a Sweet FA season that was simultaneously short and long the Warriors took some time to recharge, rejoice, reflect and reconnect. Here's a few of the highlights...
TheInjuryFactory spent some time with the family down South before tackling some DIY jobs around the place. In particular he upgraded his trophy cabinet as his old one was buckling from all of the accolades he's collected. He also spent a bit of time with Freofalcon up at Gwelup Croatia Soccer Club watching the World Cup in the wee hours of the night.
On the other side of town, Agent93 picked up some decent West Coast IPA from Piggy Smalls before cranking the air con right up so it felt like winter and watched his beloved Toronto Maple Leafs rise to second in the NHL Atlantic Division.
Speaking of winter, SBYM has been freezing his arse off over in jolly England. He's been keeping warm by calling spudmaster whose spicy language is enough to thaw anything out.
Back in Australia, Dinsdale went to town to stock up on kviek yeast as he ran out while making a Christmasbraü. He had the in-laws come over and they drank him dry.
After receiving the best Christmas sweater ever, FootyGuy13 did a bunch of work on his spreadsheets before getting to the MCG for the Boxing Day Test. There was a bit of drama though while getting into the MCC area. Some bloke with a mustache named Andrich Nortje pushed past him then swore at him in Afrikaans. Guy got pissed off so he got Mofra (who was there impersonating Kerry O'Keefe) to sneak him into the TV broadcast control centre and have a go at piloting the Spidercam, and hit Nortje good with cricket's version of the Hubble telescope.
toxic spent the time indoors wishing the weather was better, The Half Back went down the coast and sat in a rubber tube off the coast of Lorne, TubbsFarquhar and Purple7x08_24 listened to a whole lot of music, Snuffaluphagus has started writing his autobiography for the fifth time, Cesoir was complaining about the humidity, Moo spent the time under a tree, Frankston Rover spent the time burrowing, while Ambrose Burnside Mesc & WaywardSonSon considered going for a swim at Cottesloe beach however the presence of the Noahs put them off so went to AdventureWorld instead. Raveneyes spent the time on the couch ignoring his family, Reginald Perrin napped three times daily, Lord_Flashheart got one of those golden passes that gets you into the Gold Coast theme parks as much as you want for Christmas so we haven't seen him in a month. And we haven't seen much of FurTheWin BEEG Volbeat Stronzo or Smoooothy so they must have take extra time off.
You may be thinking at this point "What did Bob get up to?" Either that or "Get to the bloody point, Bob!" Well to cover both of those things off, I managed to get back to my Pacific paradise home and spent some time with my family, because for a lot of us this time of the year is all about family. And speaking of family, I caught up with my cousin from another island CursingFijian and boy did we have a ball. We drank a skinful of kava, played music on the beach with Uncle Jake and and pig cooked in the umu until it came out of our ears. Man, there's no Christmas like an Islander Christmas!
So one night over Christmas CursingFijian was talking about the premiership he just won with the Baghdad Bombers, and when the family asked where I premiership was I told them that I've won a State of Origin title but no premiership. The family laughed and laughed, until Uncle Jake suggested that CursingFijian go and help to get my own premiership. "You leave them camels alone boy and you help your cousin out. Blood is thicker than water hey" he said. I said that kava is thicker than blood, we all laughed and the deal was done. I hastily drew up the contract and before he could sober up the premiership player and season 33 All-Sweet FA ruckman became a Warrior!
So that leaves one final Warrior, pantskyle. He also had an eventful Christmas, spending the day with his family. They do the full on Christmas lunch with a burgeoning table full of food including all of the usual suspects. pantskyle almost swallowed a 50 cent coin that was hidden inside his Christmas pudding but thankfully spat it back out before it could do any damage. The coin that is, not the pudding.
Something else they do is a Kris Kringle and this year he had drawn the name of his brother to get a present for. No not Zeppo the lesser-known third brother, but The Filth Wizard who is notoriously hard to buy for. I mean, what do you get for the man that has virtually everything there is to get in a 342-game career? He has two premierships, two beez trophies, a Fred medal, fourteen (14) All-Sweet FA guernseys, Hall of Fame induction, league administratorship and probably a thousand other awards over a glittering career. But then pantskyle remembered back to seasons 21 and 22 when he and The Filth Wizard played together for the East Side Hawks, how much joy it gave them and how much they terrorised the rest of the competition. So with the feeling of nostalgia in his heart, the glint of Christmas lights in his eye and the whiff of brandy-infused eggnog on his breath he reached under the Christmas tree, pulled out a present and handed it to his equally nostalgic/reflective/intoxicated brother. The Filth Wizard pulled open the wrapping paper and, instead of finding one of pantskyle's awards which would complete the set, found a jumper. Not a knitted Christmas jumper, although it did have a tree on it. It was a Coney Island Warriors jumper.
The Filth Wizard was initially shocked. "What the heck is this? Why are you giving me a Warriors guernsey?" he said.
pantskyle, in a gesture so wonderful that if it were a film then James Stewart would play the leading role, replied "It's not just the guernsey I'm giving you. Brother, I'm giving myself to you. It's time we were reunited and played on the same team. They hugged and cried, and in that embrace The Filth Wizard said "Well you could come and play with me at Gold City" and they laughed and laughed and laughed some more.
Once I returned to Van Cortlandt Park pantskyle brought The Filth Wizard into the office and, before he could return his present, he signed on the dotted line to become a Warrior, just like his brother. A true Festivus miracle!!!!
So ladies and gentlemen, please join me in welcoming to the Coney Island Warriors an absolute icon of the league and one of Sweet's up and coming superstars - The Filth Wizard and CursingFijian!!!
