Kennedy Parker
🎨𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖎𝖘𝖙🎨
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- #1
Mount Buller Demons vs Sin City Swamprats
At The Snow Dome
It's a new season in the Sweet Football Association with plenty of exciting stories to be told in the 36th edition of this great competition. With new personas, new rivalries, new stars to emerge.
But before we get to all the shiny new toys that can be played with. Let's take a look at the season just gone for these two teams...
S35 Recap - Mount Buller Demons
The home team have taken home the wooden spoon in Season 35, with an absolute disastrous season netting only 2 wins. Noted non-contributor who sits on his arse - Headless proving to be a continual liability. While boom recruit Wosh brought the Coney Island Warriors' stench of failure to stink up the Snow Dome. It the worst season on record for a normally proud and successful club and they will be hoping to turn things around in Season 36.
S35 Recap - Sin City Swamprats
While the Mount Buller Demons were insipid, the Swamprats were not much better in Season 35. A season that started disastrously with a Round 1 team sheet error sending captain philreich in for a league mandated colonoscopy. Things only got worse from there with only 4 wins for the season, only a couple of late wins helped the Rats avoid the spoon. okeydoke7's quest for 1000 goals was derailed in spectacular manner as he failed to kick more than 3 goals in a single game after Round 8. A final round benching in front of a packed Okey's Outhouse, ignominously replaced by Jewelsbon capping off a comical season.
okey doesn't know, how to find the goals
with his thousand milestone approaching
needing to kick four, he can't even score
it just seems this season, okey doesn't goal.
Oh, okey doesn't go-al. So don't pass to okey,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
(so don't pass to okey)
I can't believe the s**t he's posting,
Jewelsbon replaces him, you're joking!
Cos okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
(Don't pass to okey!)
Taking shots, missing from the square.
That's if he can even win a contest.
Too busy spamming his resume.
To bother showing up on game day.
He was great in the past,
but now he does nothing.
Cos okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
He used to rock Qooty, but now he doesn't know,
how to find the goals, the countdown is so slow.
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
Shall we put him in the ruck? He'd still suck!
He'll never be greater than Tarks
Hate's had enough, he wants some goals
Tired of waiting, he's calling Itsmyshow
(calling Itsmyshow...)
(You're at the wrong end of the ground okey!)
He was even chased down by Jezmiester, in the backline...
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
okey doesn't know, how to find the goals,
okey's gotta know, I'm gonna show okey,
gotta show him myself, okey doesn't know,
okey doesn't know
okey has to
okey has to
okey has to goal
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
chant
OKEY DOESN'T GOAL x8
Okey's gotta go!
with his thousand milestone approaching
needing to kick four, he can't even score
it just seems this season, okey doesn't goal.
Oh, okey doesn't go-al. So don't pass to okey,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
(so don't pass to okey)
I can't believe the s**t he's posting,
Jewelsbon replaces him, you're joking!
Cos okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
(Don't pass to okey!)
Taking shots, missing from the square.
That's if he can even win a contest.
Too busy spamming his resume.
To bother showing up on game day.
He was great in the past,
but now he does nothing.
Cos okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
He used to rock Qooty, but now he doesn't know,
how to find the goals, the countdown is so slow.
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
Shall we put him in the ruck? He'd still suck!
He'll never be greater than Tarks
Hate's had enough, he wants some goals
Tired of waiting, he's calling Itsmyshow
(calling Itsmyshow...)
(You're at the wrong end of the ground okey!)
He was even chased down by Jezmiester, in the backline...
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal,
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
okey doesn't know, how to find the goals,
okey's gotta know, I'm gonna show okey,
gotta show him myself, okey doesn't know,
okey doesn't know
okey has to
okey has to
okey has to goal
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
okey doesn't goal, okey doesn't goal
So don't pass to okey, okey doesn't goal.
chant
OKEY DOESN'T GOAL x8
Okey's gotta go!
The Off-Season - Mount Buller Demons
The Demons let go of Callums_Guns while bringing in the extremely talented Gralin after an expansive scouting mission to the Gee Dee Board and Scythe94 from the Furies.
The Off-Season - Sin City Swamprats
The Swamprats have applied some moneyball recruitment principles, attempting to get some underutilized players across the league. Bringing in paraaaa from the Dragons, superstar Rodney Dangerfield from the Gumbies and the enigmatic premiership player The Jesus in the hopes of improving on-field performances.
Captains Please Submit Team Sheets by 11:59pm Thursday, AWST
I’m so three thousand and eight, he so two thousand and late 
