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If this happened at the Ski Club, Balta just needs to use the Heath Scotland defence and claim that any conviction will ruin his chances of becoming a fireman post AFL-career. I say that because Scotland got into strife at the same place. I was up at Yarrawonga during Cup week, and the Ski club...

In general, I find bowls administration some of the most baffling and amateurish going ‘round at times.

I think he’s a waiter

Dodoro said to Essendon that when he dies, that he’s to be cremated and for the ashes to be sprinkled on Essendon’s cereal so that he could go through Essendon just one last time.

Really? Bowlsvic went through this drama about 20 years ago when I started playing. Apparently all the old boys were upset they couldn’t swear any more and had to be mindful of their humour. What compounded the issue was in metro, there was still Tuesday Ladies only pennant but open gender on...

Ruins the fun. You could have come dressed as Laura Kane if you wanted to offend people.

Have you tried suppositories?

We’re a mixed family - me Hawthorn and my wife Melbourne. We had a loose arrangement that sons would follow Hawthorn and daughters would follow Melbourne. We had one of each and that’s how it’s panned out. The boy’s in his teens and probably sees more Hawthorn games live than I do. The...

In the running for the Leon Davis medal today.

I got dibs on Zorko

Tina Arena snuck in for about 15 seconds of work so you might be in with a chance.

Lossmire

We’re in P14. Most folks here look like corporates. I can tell - we’re dressed like slobs and they’re not.

Saw some kids with clipboards assembled together to the side as I skimmed through the turnstiles. I whispered to one of them “You know, you might catch people if you actually stop them as they walk through.”

In 2015, my wife and I got seats in N24 as competing Gold. Because Silver went on sale for competing, I bought a ticket for my 8 year old. His seat was row AA in the nosebleeds. Guess who sat in the nosebleeds? :D

Someone had a theory here a few weeks ago that I reckon has legs - that being that tightening up the Absentee membership rort has forced members into paying their gold membership fees, thus significantly reducing the vacancies available for upgrades. It makes a lot of sense.

Those cup holders are useful as balls on a cow. They make it impossible to move up and down the row when all are seated.

I remember when they kept an allocation for phone in transactions. I reckon I purchased GF tickets twice while standing and waiting in a queue. And there was also the self-serving tossers at Sable’s Pharmacy in Coburg who processed GF seats for their staff members before allowing the rest of us...

as well as this Saturday, I sat in P14 in 2014 and 2016 if that means anything.

Wife got them. P14 Row F x 4. I don't mind Row F. You can just climb over your seat and not have to knock knees with all the other people in your row as you're getting in and out.

Wife is in the 140's and 240's on her devices. I'm 1600 one and 2100 on the other. Why couldn't they do this yesterday?

I joined in 1994 and took up gold in 1998. Wife 2002 and 2009. Kids 2010 and 2022.

Great game. Both sides are a little banged up so would have expected changes next week whichever side ended up winning.

My boss grew up in Camperdown - being a few years his senior - and remembers Kenny being a campaigner from way back.

Started training for next year’s Tour de France

I think a mental fragility was exposed yet again, when a newly joined coach expressed that 80 per cent of the club’s next premiership team was already on the list. That’s working out so well.

The Hok Ball extends life The Hok Ball expands consciousness

Great game. We nearly pinched it but we were chasing the game all night. Port’s pressure was immense and our boys couldn’t match it. We’ll be better for it.

His teeth

Losing? I’m losing IQ by the word reading this this gibberish