Loose at HB
Professional Melter
Each year brings with it a number of rounds that are of particular note for footy fans. Round 1 is loved by all for obvious reasons, the byes are detested by all for other obvious reasons, the Queen’s Birthday weekend brings with it the now-traditional Big Freeze event and Round 23 usually means that fans of 17 clubs can rejoice at adding another 365 days to the “Days since Essendon last won a final” counter. Yet for those of a SuperCoach persuasion, there is a special note reserved for Round 3 – the round where making the right call can be the difference between keeping up your push at the top or falling back into the masses struggling in the desperate 5-digit realms.
Ask an average footy fan about the significance of Round 3 and they’ll probably look at you the same way most ruckmen look at the umpires after they’ve just plucked another free kick out of thin air. Ask someone who plays SuperCoach the same question and they’ll go on some long-winded spiel about how “cash is king” and that they’re not sure how they’re going to fit in the 25 blokes priced between 250 and 400k who’ve all gone gangbusters in the past fortnight with only 3 trades. Round 3 is where all logic goes out the window; where the 1000 hours spent trialling different structures becomes irrelevant because Jack Sinclair is averaging 107 and he’s now a must have POD in order to get away from the groupthink. Forget that other flog Jack that plays for St. Kilda… what’s his name, Steal or something? He’s not even averaging 100, give him the flick.
Isaac Heeney’s going at 140 a clip? Forget the fact that he’s a serial burnman, you NEED him and you need him now, whatever the expense. Didn’t consider Luke Jackson at all in pre-season? You’re sure as ****ing hell considering him now. Even Ben Keays looks attractive – you’re willing to put aside the fact that he couldn’t hit the side of a barn door and his current scoring isn’t sustainable. It’s all about the NOW.
Despite Round 3 generally bringing out the absolute worst in most SuperCoachers, there is a level of importance to getting this round right. It’s the last chance to get your rookies right before their prices go the way of oil and gas worldwide at the moment, and while generally trading out an underperforming premo after 2 rounds isn’t the greatest of ideas, sometimes it’s necessary in order to restructure your side and set yourself up in the best possible fashion for the rest of the season. Or you could just own Lachie Whitfield, in which case you should trade the campaigner and never look back
WESTERN BULLDOGS vs SYDNEY
The first game of the round brings with it a multitude of popular options. There isn’t much left to be said about Jack Macrae other than if you don’t own him you should delete your team, while Josh Dunkley salvaged a respectable 97 following a pretty piss poor attempt at tagging Patrick Cripps. The Bont hasn’t really looked like himself so far and has relied on his much famed KOTD to post 2 tons, and to be fair to him it doesn’t help rucking to Tim English who despite putting up fantastic fantasy numbers doesn’t actually seem to be much good at his job. Bailey Dale’s seagulling form from last season has continued in further evidence that anyone who fails any position can just be sent to half back, while Adam Treloar will be watched closely this week to see if the suggested “Bailey Smith curse” has any merit regarding his scoring.
For the Swans, Jake Lloyd missed Round 1 following a scarcely believable bout of COVID, given that the fabled Gull has been social distancing before it was cool. He looked a bit rusty in the first half last week, but being a filthy seagull is like riding a bike and true to form he scabbed his way to the ton. Isaac Heeney might average 140 this season if he continues his current form to kick 88 goals, and as tempting as his form may look I would encourage looking at a man with this level of burnman history with a healthy amount of skepticism. The Swans have also given us 2 splendiferous rookies to start the year – Paddy McCartin’s miraculous rags to riches story warms even the coldest heart while Dylan Stephens has begun to look something like the top 10 pick he was drafted as. Given the great rookie shortage of 2022, McCartin should be in every team but Stephens’ price may make him prohibitive for some, given the collection of other expensive midfield options.
MELBOURNE vs ESSENDON
People are quick to write off a man these days but one look at Max Gawn’s opposition this week should be reason enough to keep hold of the Bearded One. Big Max has unfortunately left his hands in 2021 but he should absolutely plunder a number of HTA this week against the corpse of an Essendon midfield. Christian Petracca and Clayton Oliver can also both be expected to go large, both starting the year in sensational nick with Petracca in particular looking like close to the best player in the competition. Many SuperCoachers also have their eyes on young Jake Bowey, a massive 151 in the absence of Christian Salem making him ripe for some quick cash gen given his measly starting price of 265k.
Big Max trying to clunk a mark in 2022
The Bombers were talked up by a senile Mick Malthouse in pre-season but reality and a ton as injuries has hit them like a freight train. Zach Merrett will be out for 6-8 weeks but his absence opens up a window of opportunity for Jye Caldwell, the talented young midfielder averaging 90 through the first 2 rounds and at only 266k, he shapes as a great stepping stone with scope to average close to the ton in Merrett’s absence. Darcy Parish has been good but yet to hit the lofty heights of last season, while Jordan Ridley’s nagging accountability is proving a problem for many owners. A healthy dose of CD lipstick carried him to the ton last week and although he is likely the least of many Coaches problems, his start to the season does not inspire confidence. Thankfully, the Bombers should be boosted by the return of Nick Martin whose quite absurd debut statistics will have many keen to start him on field.
ADELAIDE vs PORT ADELAIDE
Ben Keays has relished the extra responsibility in the absence of ManGullPig Rory Laird but despite his scoring, Laird’s looming return and Keays’ usual aversity to hitting a target leaves him as one I think should be left through to the keeper for the time being. Jordan Dawson has been solid without being spectacular in the first 2 rounds and seems to still be adjusting to his new surroundings, flanked by a number of young kids and rookies who are the source of most of the Crows’ interest from an SC perspective. Josh Rachele couldn’t quite back up his stellar Round 1 effort but an encouraging amount of time up the ground suggests his floor is higher than most rookie small forwards, while Mitchell Hinge’s shoulder has somehow survived the first 2 rounds and a score of 84 last week marks him as a solid on-field option. By contrast, a combination of being just a bit too raw and the sub role has left Jake Soligo more likely to drop cash than earn it if he does play and if you are missing any of the other gun rooks, he should be one of the first to go.
Port Adelaide’s form in the first 2 weeks suggests that Michael Voss may have been a little more than just an “assistant”, and Kent Hinkley’s decision to debut both of Josh Sinn and Sam Skinner in Round 2 earned the ire of Coaches everywhere. Thankfully from an SC perspective, neither really set the house on fire with Skinner’s 45 only slightly more palatable than Sinn’s 24. Zak Butters has looked electric in midfield but everyone and their dog owns him, while Dan Houston’s shift to a wing combined with his now-customary early season vigour has Coaches looking to him as a replacement for underperforming premos at 468k. I’ll save my last mention here for Travis Boak who simply doesn’t seem to get old, but also started last season incredibly well before falling away.
GWS vs GOLD COAST
I’ve traded Lachie Whitfield out of my team more times than there have been COVID variants so far this week and he looks like staying out of it. Despite apparently having his best ever pre-season and being “fitter than he has even better”, Whitfield has started the season a bit like a rusty old door frame needing some WD40. 2 very underwhelming scores in the 70s and a past history that suggests an injury is never too far around the corner would have me leaning very firmly in the direct of getting rid of the paper-mache man, despite the fact he may well have a big score in him. Josh Kelly’s hamstrings aren’t really much sturdier but his biggest competition to scoring well seems to be Leon’s general campaignerism, while popular picks Stephen Coniglio and Tim Taranto have been doing the jobs Coaches expected from them.
How the Giants are planning to keep Lachie Whitfield on field in future
Talk about the Suns and 2 main men come to mind. All good teams of this era seem to have an elite midfield pairing and the Suns may just have their own with Touk Miller and Matt Rowell. Miller’s start to the season has been nothing short of sensational while the young man affectionally known as the “Red Bull” didn’t quite stand out against the Dees like he did the week prior. Rowell’s 151 in Round 1 elevated him into almost must have territory but a follow up 71 and a much more accountable role after half time raised some alarm bells. Those with him should still be very comfortable with the pick, but those without should not go moving heaven and earth if they have reasonable cash generation in other positions. The man supplying these 2 studs in Jarrod Witts has been solid in the first 2 weeks and a good cash saver for those who elected to pick him.
COLLINGWOOD vs GEELONG
Jack Crisp copped an absolute roasting from all angles after a deplorable Round 1 but rebounded strongly to post 121 and a bit of a reminder about dumping premos after 1 game. Bunless Brodie Grundy has also been solid (and truth be told, the highest averaging ruck through the first two rounds), as have Jordan de Goey and Steele Sidebottom as forward premo options. Nick Daicos’ scoring is borderline irrelevant but a 53 is not what the SC collective would have wanted from The Second Coming, while Patrick Lipinski dragged in a few impatient traders after Round 1. Although 86 for his second effort is far from disgraceful, at 360k he would have to go very well from here to make a meaningful amount of cash. For those with the sufficient size of Chol, a man called Jeremy Howe sits tantalisingly at 427k…
For the Cats, Tom Stewart was a concern for owners after the birth of hisgrandchild daughter raised the possibility of him missing but the new dad pulled up with a solid 103. Sam de Koning is likely to return after a horrible headclash in Round 1 while I sincerely hope nobody fell into the trap of Tyson Stengle in Round 1, his whopping 13 against a half decent side much more of a reflection of his footballing ability. Patrick Dangerfield isn’t really SC relevant this season given his midfield only status but struggled to back up his monster performance in Round 1 under some constant attention from Callum Mills.
BRISBANE vs NORTH MELBOURNE
Lachie. Neale. 198. Playing North this week. Do I need to say anything else?
The Lions don’t have a great deal else to offer on the SC front – Jarrod Berry has been just okay so far for 268k but is capable of a spike game that would skyrocket his cash gen, in stark contrast to Cam Rayner who still looks a bit off the pace at AFL level. Down back, the half T-rex half seagull Daniel Rich recovered from a quiet round 1 to post 124 and looks to be on track to continue his prime seagulling form.
Speaking of seagulls – North Melbourne’s top 3 scorers to date comprise 3 of the most shameless seagulls in AFL history. Aaron Hall and Jack Ziebell have transferred their love of chips onto Luke McDonald, the 3 of them evidently Rhodes scholars from the Jake Lloyd school of How to Find a Spare Chip. Ziebell appears to have been largely forgotten about by Coaches while McDonald has some appeal given his price @ 372k and likely gaining of DEF status in Round 6. The Roos also have a couple of very promising cash cows in Tristan Xerri and Jason Horne-Francis – Xerri took his chance and dominated a WAFL reserves team at the weekend while JHF nearly delivered his first ever SC ton and looks to be the beneficiary of an unfortunate injury to Tarryn Thomas, the young Roos midfielder set to miss at least a month.
The 3 North Gulls at their special pre-season training camp
CARLTON vs HAWTHORN
Every season has a comeback story that warms even the coldest heart. After 2 years in SP wilderness, Patrick Cripps has returned and re-initiated beast mode to start season 2022. Crippa has kicked 5 goals in 2 games, dominated contested ball and looked like a man many thought we would never see again – he is basically a must have. He has been well supported by new Blue George Hewett who has handballed his way to two huge tons and at only 399k, he has been a sensational starting selection. The Blues suddenly have an embarrassment of SC riches – Sam Docherty’s own incredible return from kicking the C word for the second time has seen him not miss a beat while Matthew Kennedy seems to have turned into a premo midfielder overnight. Two of the Blues’ SC forward options in Corey Durdin and Mitch McGovern were rather lacklustre last week and in McGovern’s case, his price means he can be traded to any of the number of solid forward rookies cheaper than him. One such cheaper option is Charlie Curnow, who overcame a sluggish Round 1 with a dominant Round 2 and a favourable fixture list for the next month or so makes his money making potential very tempting.
I’m not even photoshopping this one lads. He’s ****ing BACK
The Hawks have surprised all comers to be 2-0 heading into Round 3, largely on the back of the previously maligned Mitch Lewis and some ruthless efficiency up forward. 2 of their midfield rookies in Josh Ward and Connor McDonald are highly owned by SuperCoaches and both of them are likely worth persisting with – Ward finds the ball and although his scoring hasn’t been stellar to date, he looks very capable of a big score soon. McDonald has had 16 and 18 possessions in the first 2 weeks which suggests he too is also doing more than enough to keep the $$$ ticking over.
Outside of the rookies, James Sicily is the most widely owned Hawk and has been steady in the early season while also taking some SC attention away from Jack Scrimshaw, who looks tantalisingly close to breaking out. Tom Mitchell’s piggery hasn’t really been at the forefront of things in the first two weeks and he’s projected to drop a lot of cash, making him a juicy first upgrade target if he can get back to his usual scoring ways.
ST. KILDA vs RICHMOND
Owning Jack Steele this season has been a bit like finally going out with that girl you’ve had a crush on for years in high school. It’s just not quite what you thought it would be and you’re starting to have second thoughts. Well, relationship expert Loose at HB is here to tell you not to give up at the first hurdle as although you might be new to this caper, Jack Steele certainly isn’t as a SuperCoach premo and unless your structure demands you sacrifice a premo, I’d be very reluctant to get rid of him. His football club’s ability to only recruit players with first names beginning with J continues with the emergence of Jack Hayes, the 26 year old rookie stud putting in a serviceable follow up 68 albeit with doubts around his position this week due to Brett Ratten’s obsession with a cooked Paddy Ryder. Jade Gresham’s game last week proved he’s been spending too much time with Brad Crouch while Rowan Marshall also found the going tougher after a stellar Round 1.
Jayden Short is evidently loving the retirement of Bachar Houli, his now monopoly on seagulling rights at Richmond meaning that even his classic second half fadeouts haven’t stopped him from averaging 120 in the first couple of weeks. Dustin Martin unfortunately is suffering from some mental health issues and needs to be traded – SC inconsistencies aside, the man is a fantastic footballer and I hope we see him out there again soon. The Tiges are pretty light on for SC options otherwise – Josh Gibcus hasn’t exactly been stellar but has done just enough, while Daniel Rioli has just added to the catalogue of “forwards that can’t hack it so went to the HBF”.
WEST COAST vs FREMANTLE
It’s a bit hard to talk about the Eagles at this point – a Round 2 decimated by over a dozen COVID-related outs makes them a bit hard to read. Willie Rioli looks like making a decent amount of cash from 225k after a great start to the year, as will Patrick Naish who has looked quite comfortable at the level – he’s priced at 189k. The biggest problem with these two is that the forward line is filled with an embarrassment of money-making riches – just who do you pick them over? Coaches will also be hoping Brady Hough returns after an okay performance in Round 1, if for nothing else than to make our MID benches look a little less sorry.
The Dockers have (to this point) somehow largely avoided el Rona and if not the the cloud of “AFL Health and Safety Protocols” looming over their heads, would have a large number of tempting options. Andy Brayshaw genuinely looks like he’s taken the next step up to being an elite midfielder this season, a 189 in the absence of Nat Fyfe making him far and away the best player in the ground. He was ably supported by Will Brodie, the man with the worst endurance in the comp still finding his way to the ton despite only playing for about 10 minutes. The Dockers also have a couple of tasty options in defence – the usual Luke Ryan rollercoaster continued while Hayden Young looks ripe to break out and for those jumping off Lachie Whitfield, he may present an option at 418k. On the negative side, Sean Darcy’s body has broken down again and there remains a cloud over his availability for the upcoming round.
70% TOG? Get that out of your ****ing mouth
So after all of this – who will you trade? Are you going to give that underperforming premo the flick? Are you going to take a punt on the midpricer nobody else owns? Do you have all of the important rookies? These can all be season defining moments, and there’s no right or wrong answer… unless the situation involves that kent Whitfield.
Best of luck, my fellow melty brethren. May the Chol be with you
Ask an average footy fan about the significance of Round 3 and they’ll probably look at you the same way most ruckmen look at the umpires after they’ve just plucked another free kick out of thin air. Ask someone who plays SuperCoach the same question and they’ll go on some long-winded spiel about how “cash is king” and that they’re not sure how they’re going to fit in the 25 blokes priced between 250 and 400k who’ve all gone gangbusters in the past fortnight with only 3 trades. Round 3 is where all logic goes out the window; where the 1000 hours spent trialling different structures becomes irrelevant because Jack Sinclair is averaging 107 and he’s now a must have POD in order to get away from the groupthink. Forget that other flog Jack that plays for St. Kilda… what’s his name, Steal or something? He’s not even averaging 100, give him the flick.
Isaac Heeney’s going at 140 a clip? Forget the fact that he’s a serial burnman, you NEED him and you need him now, whatever the expense. Didn’t consider Luke Jackson at all in pre-season? You’re sure as ****ing hell considering him now. Even Ben Keays looks attractive – you’re willing to put aside the fact that he couldn’t hit the side of a barn door and his current scoring isn’t sustainable. It’s all about the NOW.
Despite Round 3 generally bringing out the absolute worst in most SuperCoachers, there is a level of importance to getting this round right. It’s the last chance to get your rookies right before their prices go the way of oil and gas worldwide at the moment, and while generally trading out an underperforming premo after 2 rounds isn’t the greatest of ideas, sometimes it’s necessary in order to restructure your side and set yourself up in the best possible fashion for the rest of the season. Or you could just own Lachie Whitfield, in which case you should trade the campaigner and never look back
WESTERN BULLDOGS vs SYDNEY
The first game of the round brings with it a multitude of popular options. There isn’t much left to be said about Jack Macrae other than if you don’t own him you should delete your team, while Josh Dunkley salvaged a respectable 97 following a pretty piss poor attempt at tagging Patrick Cripps. The Bont hasn’t really looked like himself so far and has relied on his much famed KOTD to post 2 tons, and to be fair to him it doesn’t help rucking to Tim English who despite putting up fantastic fantasy numbers doesn’t actually seem to be much good at his job. Bailey Dale’s seagulling form from last season has continued in further evidence that anyone who fails any position can just be sent to half back, while Adam Treloar will be watched closely this week to see if the suggested “Bailey Smith curse” has any merit regarding his scoring.
For the Swans, Jake Lloyd missed Round 1 following a scarcely believable bout of COVID, given that the fabled Gull has been social distancing before it was cool. He looked a bit rusty in the first half last week, but being a filthy seagull is like riding a bike and true to form he scabbed his way to the ton. Isaac Heeney might average 140 this season if he continues his current form to kick 88 goals, and as tempting as his form may look I would encourage looking at a man with this level of burnman history with a healthy amount of skepticism. The Swans have also given us 2 splendiferous rookies to start the year – Paddy McCartin’s miraculous rags to riches story warms even the coldest heart while Dylan Stephens has begun to look something like the top 10 pick he was drafted as. Given the great rookie shortage of 2022, McCartin should be in every team but Stephens’ price may make him prohibitive for some, given the collection of other expensive midfield options.
MELBOURNE vs ESSENDON
People are quick to write off a man these days but one look at Max Gawn’s opposition this week should be reason enough to keep hold of the Bearded One. Big Max has unfortunately left his hands in 2021 but he should absolutely plunder a number of HTA this week against the corpse of an Essendon midfield. Christian Petracca and Clayton Oliver can also both be expected to go large, both starting the year in sensational nick with Petracca in particular looking like close to the best player in the competition. Many SuperCoachers also have their eyes on young Jake Bowey, a massive 151 in the absence of Christian Salem making him ripe for some quick cash gen given his measly starting price of 265k.
Big Max trying to clunk a mark in 2022
The Bombers were talked up by a senile Mick Malthouse in pre-season but reality and a ton as injuries has hit them like a freight train. Zach Merrett will be out for 6-8 weeks but his absence opens up a window of opportunity for Jye Caldwell, the talented young midfielder averaging 90 through the first 2 rounds and at only 266k, he shapes as a great stepping stone with scope to average close to the ton in Merrett’s absence. Darcy Parish has been good but yet to hit the lofty heights of last season, while Jordan Ridley’s nagging accountability is proving a problem for many owners. A healthy dose of CD lipstick carried him to the ton last week and although he is likely the least of many Coaches problems, his start to the season does not inspire confidence. Thankfully, the Bombers should be boosted by the return of Nick Martin whose quite absurd debut statistics will have many keen to start him on field.
ADELAIDE vs PORT ADELAIDE
Ben Keays has relished the extra responsibility in the absence of ManGullPig Rory Laird but despite his scoring, Laird’s looming return and Keays’ usual aversity to hitting a target leaves him as one I think should be left through to the keeper for the time being. Jordan Dawson has been solid without being spectacular in the first 2 rounds and seems to still be adjusting to his new surroundings, flanked by a number of young kids and rookies who are the source of most of the Crows’ interest from an SC perspective. Josh Rachele couldn’t quite back up his stellar Round 1 effort but an encouraging amount of time up the ground suggests his floor is higher than most rookie small forwards, while Mitchell Hinge’s shoulder has somehow survived the first 2 rounds and a score of 84 last week marks him as a solid on-field option. By contrast, a combination of being just a bit too raw and the sub role has left Jake Soligo more likely to drop cash than earn it if he does play and if you are missing any of the other gun rooks, he should be one of the first to go.
Port Adelaide’s form in the first 2 weeks suggests that Michael Voss may have been a little more than just an “assistant”, and Kent Hinkley’s decision to debut both of Josh Sinn and Sam Skinner in Round 2 earned the ire of Coaches everywhere. Thankfully from an SC perspective, neither really set the house on fire with Skinner’s 45 only slightly more palatable than Sinn’s 24. Zak Butters has looked electric in midfield but everyone and their dog owns him, while Dan Houston’s shift to a wing combined with his now-customary early season vigour has Coaches looking to him as a replacement for underperforming premos at 468k. I’ll save my last mention here for Travis Boak who simply doesn’t seem to get old, but also started last season incredibly well before falling away.
GWS vs GOLD COAST
I’ve traded Lachie Whitfield out of my team more times than there have been COVID variants so far this week and he looks like staying out of it. Despite apparently having his best ever pre-season and being “fitter than he has even better”, Whitfield has started the season a bit like a rusty old door frame needing some WD40. 2 very underwhelming scores in the 70s and a past history that suggests an injury is never too far around the corner would have me leaning very firmly in the direct of getting rid of the paper-mache man, despite the fact he may well have a big score in him. Josh Kelly’s hamstrings aren’t really much sturdier but his biggest competition to scoring well seems to be Leon’s general campaignerism, while popular picks Stephen Coniglio and Tim Taranto have been doing the jobs Coaches expected from them.
How the Giants are planning to keep Lachie Whitfield on field in future
Talk about the Suns and 2 main men come to mind. All good teams of this era seem to have an elite midfield pairing and the Suns may just have their own with Touk Miller and Matt Rowell. Miller’s start to the season has been nothing short of sensational while the young man affectionally known as the “Red Bull” didn’t quite stand out against the Dees like he did the week prior. Rowell’s 151 in Round 1 elevated him into almost must have territory but a follow up 71 and a much more accountable role after half time raised some alarm bells. Those with him should still be very comfortable with the pick, but those without should not go moving heaven and earth if they have reasonable cash generation in other positions. The man supplying these 2 studs in Jarrod Witts has been solid in the first 2 weeks and a good cash saver for those who elected to pick him.
COLLINGWOOD vs GEELONG
Jack Crisp copped an absolute roasting from all angles after a deplorable Round 1 but rebounded strongly to post 121 and a bit of a reminder about dumping premos after 1 game. Bunless Brodie Grundy has also been solid (and truth be told, the highest averaging ruck through the first two rounds), as have Jordan de Goey and Steele Sidebottom as forward premo options. Nick Daicos’ scoring is borderline irrelevant but a 53 is not what the SC collective would have wanted from The Second Coming, while Patrick Lipinski dragged in a few impatient traders after Round 1. Although 86 for his second effort is far from disgraceful, at 360k he would have to go very well from here to make a meaningful amount of cash. For those with the sufficient size of Chol, a man called Jeremy Howe sits tantalisingly at 427k…
For the Cats, Tom Stewart was a concern for owners after the birth of his
BRISBANE vs NORTH MELBOURNE
Lachie. Neale. 198. Playing North this week. Do I need to say anything else?
The Lions don’t have a great deal else to offer on the SC front – Jarrod Berry has been just okay so far for 268k but is capable of a spike game that would skyrocket his cash gen, in stark contrast to Cam Rayner who still looks a bit off the pace at AFL level. Down back, the half T-rex half seagull Daniel Rich recovered from a quiet round 1 to post 124 and looks to be on track to continue his prime seagulling form.
Speaking of seagulls – North Melbourne’s top 3 scorers to date comprise 3 of the most shameless seagulls in AFL history. Aaron Hall and Jack Ziebell have transferred their love of chips onto Luke McDonald, the 3 of them evidently Rhodes scholars from the Jake Lloyd school of How to Find a Spare Chip. Ziebell appears to have been largely forgotten about by Coaches while McDonald has some appeal given his price @ 372k and likely gaining of DEF status in Round 6. The Roos also have a couple of very promising cash cows in Tristan Xerri and Jason Horne-Francis – Xerri took his chance and dominated a WAFL reserves team at the weekend while JHF nearly delivered his first ever SC ton and looks to be the beneficiary of an unfortunate injury to Tarryn Thomas, the young Roos midfielder set to miss at least a month.
The 3 North Gulls at their special pre-season training camp
CARLTON vs HAWTHORN
Every season has a comeback story that warms even the coldest heart. After 2 years in SP wilderness, Patrick Cripps has returned and re-initiated beast mode to start season 2022. Crippa has kicked 5 goals in 2 games, dominated contested ball and looked like a man many thought we would never see again – he is basically a must have. He has been well supported by new Blue George Hewett who has handballed his way to two huge tons and at only 399k, he has been a sensational starting selection. The Blues suddenly have an embarrassment of SC riches – Sam Docherty’s own incredible return from kicking the C word for the second time has seen him not miss a beat while Matthew Kennedy seems to have turned into a premo midfielder overnight. Two of the Blues’ SC forward options in Corey Durdin and Mitch McGovern were rather lacklustre last week and in McGovern’s case, his price means he can be traded to any of the number of solid forward rookies cheaper than him. One such cheaper option is Charlie Curnow, who overcame a sluggish Round 1 with a dominant Round 2 and a favourable fixture list for the next month or so makes his money making potential very tempting.
I’m not even photoshopping this one lads. He’s ****ing BACK
The Hawks have surprised all comers to be 2-0 heading into Round 3, largely on the back of the previously maligned Mitch Lewis and some ruthless efficiency up forward. 2 of their midfield rookies in Josh Ward and Connor McDonald are highly owned by SuperCoaches and both of them are likely worth persisting with – Ward finds the ball and although his scoring hasn’t been stellar to date, he looks very capable of a big score soon. McDonald has had 16 and 18 possessions in the first 2 weeks which suggests he too is also doing more than enough to keep the $$$ ticking over.
Outside of the rookies, James Sicily is the most widely owned Hawk and has been steady in the early season while also taking some SC attention away from Jack Scrimshaw, who looks tantalisingly close to breaking out. Tom Mitchell’s piggery hasn’t really been at the forefront of things in the first two weeks and he’s projected to drop a lot of cash, making him a juicy first upgrade target if he can get back to his usual scoring ways.
ST. KILDA vs RICHMOND
Owning Jack Steele this season has been a bit like finally going out with that girl you’ve had a crush on for years in high school. It’s just not quite what you thought it would be and you’re starting to have second thoughts. Well, relationship expert Loose at HB is here to tell you not to give up at the first hurdle as although you might be new to this caper, Jack Steele certainly isn’t as a SuperCoach premo and unless your structure demands you sacrifice a premo, I’d be very reluctant to get rid of him. His football club’s ability to only recruit players with first names beginning with J continues with the emergence of Jack Hayes, the 26 year old rookie stud putting in a serviceable follow up 68 albeit with doubts around his position this week due to Brett Ratten’s obsession with a cooked Paddy Ryder. Jade Gresham’s game last week proved he’s been spending too much time with Brad Crouch while Rowan Marshall also found the going tougher after a stellar Round 1.
Jayden Short is evidently loving the retirement of Bachar Houli, his now monopoly on seagulling rights at Richmond meaning that even his classic second half fadeouts haven’t stopped him from averaging 120 in the first couple of weeks. Dustin Martin unfortunately is suffering from some mental health issues and needs to be traded – SC inconsistencies aside, the man is a fantastic footballer and I hope we see him out there again soon. The Tiges are pretty light on for SC options otherwise – Josh Gibcus hasn’t exactly been stellar but has done just enough, while Daniel Rioli has just added to the catalogue of “forwards that can’t hack it so went to the HBF”.
WEST COAST vs FREMANTLE
It’s a bit hard to talk about the Eagles at this point – a Round 2 decimated by over a dozen COVID-related outs makes them a bit hard to read. Willie Rioli looks like making a decent amount of cash from 225k after a great start to the year, as will Patrick Naish who has looked quite comfortable at the level – he’s priced at 189k. The biggest problem with these two is that the forward line is filled with an embarrassment of money-making riches – just who do you pick them over? Coaches will also be hoping Brady Hough returns after an okay performance in Round 1, if for nothing else than to make our MID benches look a little less sorry.
The Dockers have (to this point) somehow largely avoided el Rona and if not the the cloud of “AFL Health and Safety Protocols” looming over their heads, would have a large number of tempting options. Andy Brayshaw genuinely looks like he’s taken the next step up to being an elite midfielder this season, a 189 in the absence of Nat Fyfe making him far and away the best player in the ground. He was ably supported by Will Brodie, the man with the worst endurance in the comp still finding his way to the ton despite only playing for about 10 minutes. The Dockers also have a couple of tasty options in defence – the usual Luke Ryan rollercoaster continued while Hayden Young looks ripe to break out and for those jumping off Lachie Whitfield, he may present an option at 418k. On the negative side, Sean Darcy’s body has broken down again and there remains a cloud over his availability for the upcoming round.
70% TOG? Get that out of your ****ing mouth
So after all of this – who will you trade? Are you going to give that underperforming premo the flick? Are you going to take a punt on the midpricer nobody else owns? Do you have all of the important rookies? These can all be season defining moments, and there’s no right or wrong answer… unless the situation involves that kent Whitfield.
Best of luck, my fellow melty brethren. May the Chol be with you
