2025 - Predictions for our most important season in a long time

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Im taking the piss obviously but many of us are in lala land.

Are Simpkin and McDonald still co-captains?

If yes we are not serious. Pencil in 2 wins.
We'll have 2 wins by Round 4 at the latest. Come at me, may the best bullshitter win.
 
We are still the youngest list in the league and don't know to win. I think wanting 5 wins is optimistic. I can't see any way we get to 10+ wins until Sheezel, Wardlaw etc are at least 23-24 years old and can lead this team

Thats 4 years away
I think it will turn much faster than that. Our average age this year is older than Hawthorn's was last year and our younger players mostly have higher ceilings. No reason we shouldn't make similar improvements to theirs. A lot will depend on our game plan and whether we can develop something to suit our player's strengths, like they did.
 

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We are still the youngest team in the league, this has at least 3 seasons more before it finally turns. Keeping in mind 5 wins is more than what we have had any year this decade

We have no chance against Carlton and the Bulldogs, both far too good,

Round 3 - Might be a chance against Melbourne but we aren't beating them twice
Round 7 - We aren't beating Carlton
Round 9 - 50/50 against Essendon if we have no injuries
Round 16 - Again, we aren't beating Carlton
Round 19 - See round 3, we might beat them once
Round 22 - St Kilda 50/50 who knows
Not sure what the links are between the rounds you've given and the teams you've apparently ascertained as our opponents. I chose rounds because it looked cleaner, but the teams that correspond are/were Adelaide, Brisbane, Port, Sydney (away), GWS (away), and the Hawks. In addition to the fact that I think we're guaranteed to lose to the Dogs and Carlton once each.

I simply disagree. I understand pessimism, but this is a fire-spitting, demonically influenced level of pessimism.

Three more seasons before it turns, and another season of abject misery, in a team with:

Sheezel
Wardlaw
LDU
McKercher
Larkey
Comben
Xerri
Archer
Logue
Curtis
A damaged but finally free Clarkson

Yeah. Sorry. Don't see it. Aside from our talent already surpassing that of many teams who've won 6 games in a season, if it really was three more seasons before it turned, I think the only ones on that list who'd stick around would be Sheezel, Larkey, X and Arch. And at that point, any sane fan, administrator, coach, staff member, etc. would say '**** it' and shut up shop.

I don't quite know how to communicate this but I think the club, courtesy of events over however many years you want to include, has been in a state of limbo, mired in the pits of despair and misfortune and curses and what have you. But, since Clarko came in, the club has steadily worked at rebuilding the talent base, and I think now the theoretical capabilities of that talent base reach well into mid-table. This means that if/when we resolve whatever it is that renders our players incapable of believing that they're good enough to be in front at the final siren, all the talent we have, which would shine through at any other club, will finally, finally, shine through for us, and people will be wondering how the **** we were so terrible for that long.

Of course, it's possible that whatever's broken at the club is infuriatingly and immutably unfixable. But in that case, rather than gradually building up win totals year-on-year, we'll flatline until the league inevitably steps in and signs off on our demise. I think that's a possibility. But it's not the one I'm going to run with, because I'd like to think that the state and achievement levels of all professional sporting clubs are impermanent, and therefore changeable.
 
Wins: 6

B&F: Sheezel

Does LDU stay: Yes, how many times does he have to say it.

All Aust: Sheez. Consistently amazing. Doesn't have to get a position in the midfield, which will mean he's more likely to be selected.

Does FOS place in Rising Star: Yes, 3rd.

Top 3 Leading goal kickers: Larkey, Curtis, Zurhaar

Does Chom play Fwd/Bck: Back. Settled there and hopefully with Logue and Corr taking the keys, he can peel off and play the Loogie role.

Is Durz locked best 22 come seasons end: Yes, will have a strong pre-season, and strong early season form, but will fade.

Who has the better year out of Sheez, Warlord, Kerch: Expecting big things from all, but:
1. Sheez
2. Kerch
3. Warlord

Short summary of season:

Expecting huge improvement, which means staying in games longer, and being able to challenge better teams. Ultimately, we are susceptible to injuries to our talls, and rely too much on younger players, so we will have down patches in the season and may see some big losses. If we can come away with doubling our wins, vastly improving our percentage and seeing growth from young players, it will be a good season.
 
Not sure what the links are between the rounds you've given and the teams you've apparently ascertained as our opponents. I chose rounds because it looked cleaner, but the teams that correspond are/were Adelaide, Brisbane, Port, Sydney (away), GWS (away), and the Hawks. In addition to the fact that I think we're guaranteed to lose to the Dogs and Carlton once each.

I simply disagree. I understand pessimism, but this is a fire-spitting, demonically influenced level of pessimism.

Three more seasons before it turns, and another season of abject misery, in a team with:

Sheezel
Wardlaw
LDU
McKercher
Larkey
Comben
Xerri
Archer
Logue
Curtis
A damaged but finally free Clarkson

Yeah. Sorry. Don't see it. Aside from our talent already surpassing that of many teams who've won 6 games in a season, if it really was three more seasons before it turned, I think the only ones on that list who'd stick around would be Sheezel, Larkey, X and Arch. And at that point, any sane fan, administrator, coach, staff member, etc. would say '**** it' and shut up shop.

I don't quite know how to communicate this but I think the club, courtesy of events over however many years you want to include, has been in a state of limbo, mired in the pits of despair and misfortune and curses and what have you. But, since Clarko came in, the club has steadily worked at rebuilding the talent base, and I think now the theoretical capabilities of that talent base reach well into mid-table. This means that if/when we resolve whatever it is that renders our players incapable of believing that they're good enough to be in front at the final siren, all the talent we have, which would shine through at any other club, will finally, finally, shine through for us, and people will be wondering how the **** we were so terrible for that long.

Of course, it's possible that whatever's broken at the club is infuriatingly and immutably unfixable. But in that case, rather than gradually building up win totals year-on-year, we'll flatline until the league inevitably steps in and signs off on our demise. I think that's a possibility. But it's not the one I'm going to run with, because I'd like to think that the state and achievement levels of all professional sporting clubs are impermanent, and therefore changeable.
Sad Friends Tv GIF
 
Alright. This.

2025 AFL SEASON

WINS:
3-5

B&F: LDU

DOES LDU STAY:
No signature before bye, gone.

ALL AUST: Harry after the 2024 snub and LDU

DOES FOS PLACE IN RISING STAR: Should be in the top 3, yes.

TOP 3 LEADING GOAL KICKERS: At North? Souve Curtis Zurhaar

DOES CHOM PLAY FWD/BACK: Swing man, will play in all key positions.. including ruck at times

IS DURZ LOCKED BEST 22 COME SEASONS END: Shit it in

WHO HAS THE BETTER YEAR OUT OF SHEEZ, WARLORD, KERCH: This is rhetorical, right?.

SHORT SUMMARY OF SEASON: Signs of further improvement, just too young to win games and have impact on the year. End up bottom 4 with 3-5 wins. Pick 3 wasted.
 

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2025 - Predictions for our most important season in a long time

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