- Mar 25, 2003
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This is a good one from todaystale (good website for anyone interested in some solid yarns - no doubt many now embellished - from club cricket in Sydney and Melbourne from years gone by)
Best sledge ever. Nominations.
- Thread starter Gough
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- May 5, 2016
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MyCricket has made sledging a lot easier than it otherwise might have been.
Yesterday at drinks our not out batsmen came off and one of them said ‘f*** that bloke at gully has not shut up. I hope he can play considering how he talks.’
30 seconds of phone googling later and I’d gotten his career story and went out to bat armed with the relevant information.
‘F*** you’re a lippy c*** for someone with a career average of 16 that doesn’t bowl.’ He didn’t say a lot after that.
Yesterday at drinks our not out batsmen came off and one of them said ‘f*** that bloke at gully has not shut up. I hope he can play considering how he talks.’
30 seconds of phone googling later and I’d gotten his career story and went out to bat armed with the relevant information.
‘F*** you’re a lippy c*** for someone with a career average of 16 that doesn’t bowl.’ He didn’t say a lot after that.
- Aug 2, 2012
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In the field one day against an ultra-defensive opening batsman who was having even more trouble than usual deciding to actually bplay a shot against our opening bowlers.
His first line of defence was to play and miss, and his second and third options were to pad up (just) outside off, but the ump simply wouldn't give us an LBW.
After an hour or so, at the drinks break, our skipper took pity on him.
"Getting a bit hot and bothered there, Owen, eh? Tell you what, why don't you just prop your pads up there on the pitch for a few minutes while you duck off and have a cup of tea."
His first line of defence was to play and miss, and his second and third options were to pad up (just) outside off, but the ump simply wouldn't give us an LBW.
After an hour or so, at the drinks break, our skipper took pity on him.
"Getting a bit hot and bothered there, Owen, eh? Tell you what, why don't you just prop your pads up there on the pitch for a few minutes while you duck off and have a cup of tea."
- Jul 31, 2010
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- Moderator
- #104
I thought you hated sledging?
- May 5, 2016
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I do. When I personally know, and have worked with the bloke doing it, and know that he has absolutely no cricketing pedigree to back up his mouth, I will put him in his place.
I think sledging is the dumbest thing in sport. It doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the beauty in a retort such as James Ormond’s to Mark Waugh etc.
Gethelred
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- May 1, 2016
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- #107
One of the most effective sledges I've ever given came in a game in which we were chasing an outright win. One of our opposition - who couldn't be there the first week - was named Max Power. When he walked out to bat, he's all determined, ghost batting and stretching; all I did was ask him if his name was actually Max Power. When he confirmed it, it's gone around the infield: "That name's awesome." "You could've been an '80's action character!'
He's gone from being wary and focused to being quite chuffed, even pleasantly surprised. First ball; edge to first slip.
Sledging doesn't need to be negative. Sledging doesn't need to be offensive. The purpose behind sledging is entirely to break the bats' focus on the game in order to get them out, and you can do that by making them laugh or smile.
One of the best sledges I've received was when I was walking out as a younger person. I was badly sunburnt from going to the beach a day or so earlier, and I'm on the - much - shorter side. The first slip points at me as I'm walking out, and starts whistling the oompa-loompa theme. Got me laughing with them.
People get the wrong idea. A good sledge doesn't need to be antagonistic. People just remember the antagonistic ones.
You can square it fairly easily by pointing out to the person sledging you that they’re playing the same grade as you.
- May 5, 2016
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We don’t have a team in the top grade atm and I’ll never play for another club. He’s also the son of his club’s president which goes part the way to explaining why he’s playing the grade he’s in
Worthy of a bump. At my son's under 10s game tonight when batting he was in his first sledging exchange, went like this, absolutely elite stuff.
Opponent: "You're a loser"
Son: "No you're a loser!"
Think my son took the points, very witty
Opponent: "You're a loser"
Son: "No you're a loser!"
Think my son took the points, very witty
In my son’s junior games I’ve heard
“He’s like a donut, all edge no middle!”
And
“He’s like the Wifi password, can’t connect!”
“He’s like a donut, all edge no middle!”
And
“He’s like the Wifi password, can’t connect!”
Gilly recently came out with this story in a podcast interview.
Early days in NSW grade cricket (or whatever the equivalent of the level below Shield cricket is over there). His team is playing against the third Waugh brother that no one knows about. Bowler dismisses this guy and comes out with "well, we know who the adopted one is!".
Early days in NSW grade cricket (or whatever the equivalent of the level below Shield cricket is over there). His team is playing against the third Waugh brother that no one knows about. Bowler dismisses this guy and comes out with "well, we know who the adopted one is!".
- Apr 3, 2016
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The fact that 2 out of every 3 adults in Australia are now overweight or obese means that calling someone a fat c**t on the cricket field has kind of lost the effect it used to have
Rabish Binney
Left out overnight
When a batsman plays and misses several times the old 'chuck him down a piano and see if he can play that' line comes out.
David Steele was an English batsmen who was already in his mid 30s when called up to play Tests.
In his first Test against Australia, Rod Marsh is giving him plenty of lip about being too old and too slow. Steele finally turns around:
"Hey Marshy, look at this!"
"Look at what?", says Marsh
"This arse! Get used to it, you'll be looking at it for a bloody long time!"
In his first Test against Australia, Rod Marsh is giving him plenty of lip about being too old and too slow. Steele finally turns around:
"Hey Marshy, look at this!"
"Look at what?", says Marsh
"This arse! Get used to it, you'll be looking at it for a bloody long time!"
Not the best one but I enjoyed it back in the day. He's got more missus than Shane Warne.
Did remember a situation in junior cricket where the fielder mocked the batsmen timing & continued pointing at his watch until the batsmen nearly tried to physically fight the fielder. Good old days...
Did remember a situation in junior cricket where the fielder mocked the batsmen timing & continued pointing at his watch until the batsmen nearly tried to physically fight the fielder. Good old days...
Lunchtime
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- Mar 23, 2024
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I used to umpire 1st Grade WA Premier Cricket in Perth. As an umpire we are always alert for sledging which may be seen to be against the spirit of the game. The great thing about umpiring 1st Grade WA Premier cricket was that because it's pathway cricket sometimes the First-Class/T20/One Day players return to play for their clubs and this straight away lifts the profile and standard of the match.
In one game when I was at square leg, there was a batsman who played and missed 3 times in one over to a fast bowler. The player at 1st Slip said:
"This guy can't connect and hit the ball, has he still got Dial-Up internet at home"
I smiled. I thought that was brilliant.
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This is not really a sledge, more of a smart-arse comment:
One day many years ago I turned up for cricket practice and the guys who brought all the club's cricket gear with them hadn't turned up yet. One team mate, Shaun, decided he would eat a pie while waiting for practice to begin. As he was eating, part of the pie dribbled down his shirt. Shaun noticed this and said to himself, "Ah, shit!"
Another team mate who was standing next to Shaun said, "Nah, it's just meat."
One day many years ago I turned up for cricket practice and the guys who brought all the club's cricket gear with them hadn't turned up yet. One team mate, Shaun, decided he would eat a pie while waiting for practice to begin. As he was eating, part of the pie dribbled down his shirt. Shaun noticed this and said to himself, "Ah, shit!"
Another team mate who was standing next to Shaun said, "Nah, it's just meat."
This is the only time I have heard somebody sledge themselves:
One day during my junior cricket days, we were playing a game at a local oval that had a milk bar across the road. We were batting and one of our players decided to walk across the road to buy a drink. As the rest of us sat watching our team bat, the boy came back ten minutes later and announced himself by saying, "I'm back. Can't you smell me?"
One day during my junior cricket days, we were playing a game at a local oval that had a milk bar across the road. We were batting and one of our players decided to walk across the road to buy a drink. As the rest of us sat watching our team bat, the boy came back ten minutes later and announced himself by saying, "I'm back. Can't you smell me?"
Be an empty book writing the sledges in cricket the last 10 years. Be blank pages
I played a lot of A Grade cricket and was bowling to young 17 year old (I was 21 at the time) who nicked it 3 times through the slips for 4 before finally knocking him over. gave him a bit of a send of and the young fella was not shy in giving it back. So i said to him lets see where you are in a few years champ. Well as it turns out that young bloke played 60 odd tests and 200 odd ODI and every time I see him we have a great laugh about that day and whose career eventuated.
He could bat though. I always enjoyed getting him out. Unfortunately he'd usually made quite a few first.
- Oct 28, 2009
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In the spirit of this thread did the individual in question get sledged much during his unwarranted six year absence from national duties?
