Goodbye My Friend

Remove this Banner Ad

Terribly sad news to come across. My condolences to his family and friends, and Bombers family here on BF.

RIP The Scales.
 

Log in to remove this ad.

I struggle to imagine how difficult this must be, my deepest condolences to all friends and family of The Scales . It's heartening that some small solace can be found in that he was able to give others a second chance through donating his organs.

Rest in peace.
 
Doss said:
Speechless at this.

The Scales was an important and valued contributor to the Essendon board, but that's not a fraction of a drop in the ocean to the importance he would have played in the life of his family. To read this is just so horribly sad- a tragedy for him, and a tragedy for his partner and for his children.

My mother has suffered depression for almost fifty years and, though she has never made an attempt on her own life, it's something I feared happening occasionally as a kid. So as Yoda_ said, I cannot even fathom what it must be like to have to deal with this now.

To you- his partner and his children- I am so sorry for your loss. Words are horribly inadequate at this time, but try and remember him for the good times you shared with him.

Let this be a reminder of what a cruel and insidious thing depression is. If you're a sufferer, there will always be someone willing to talk- reach out to them. And if you suspect someone you know is a sufferer, don't ignore it- reach out to them.

I also unreservedly support what Yoda_ said- if there is anything BigFooty can do, please let us know.


The Scales, rest in peace, mate.

Doss
Click to expand...

Our Footy Brother - I hope you find peace up there and that your family down here will get through without you in one piece
 
I have lost a friend recently and Warren Zevon's "Keep me in your heart for a while" which he wrote for his wife in his last week is the only song for me that comes close to expressing the inexpressible:
 
I continue to be amazed at the BigFooty-wide response to this tragic happening. It's been very heartening to see.

The Scales wasn't on BigFooty that long compared to many of us, but he made an impact. He was noticed and, judging from the responses I've seen, he was noticed in a positive way. His intelligence and eloquent prose, certainly, walked before him. His wit was often quite subtle too, and amusing to boot.

To The Scales' partner, if you're reading- I reiterate how impressed I, no, all of us are that you managed to find the strength, let alone have the presence of mind, to come here and tell us of his passing. Your man made an impact here and he won't be forgotten. We're naming our poster of the year award 'The Scales Award' from now on in perpetuity in tribute to him. We will find some other thing appropriate in time too, perhaps something in recognition of the ongoing battle we as a society face in understanding and helping those afflicted with such a cruel disease.
 
RIP The Scales

Thoughts are with your family, close friends and yr BF Bombers community.

No Mother, Father, Wife, Husband or child should have to mourn the loss of a loved one under such tragic circumstances.

#putoutyoursash

image.jpg
 
Could of knocked me over with a feather when I read this. Can't believe it.

Didn't always agree with The Scales but I could tell what he was was a very passionate person and its an absolute tragedy that this has happened.

My heart goes out to his family as well as his Essendon brethren and hope that anyone else that is feeling even remotely unhappy in life seeks the help they need and don't try and deal with all of life's worries by themselves, there's always someone willing to lend a shoulder to lean on.

RIP The Scales :(
 
Its the Scales partner here again, still very unsure how to post on this site. Myself and the Scales and my daughters want to thank-you from the bottom of our hearts. All of the messages we have read here have helped us in so many ways, the warm wishes, kind words and recognition have made our hearts burst to know that the man we loved meant so much to you also. Already I read people opening up and sharing just a little of their own battles which makes this horrible loss we are facing just a little easier. I dont want to bore you but I do need you to know one thing and that is how much you all meant to the Scales. Only six weeks ago the Scales turned 50 and the girls (our daughters ) and I decided to buy him a new lap-top so he could spend more time with all of you. He carried that lap-top everywhere even to bed so as he could be a part of a community that he loved (and at times hated especially anyone that didnt love his beloved Bombers as much as he did). Words will never tell you all how much enjoyment and fun the Scales got from you all. So again we thank-you, and hugely respect you. In closing one thing I ask you all to tuck in your minds somewhere is the knowledge that there is always someone to talk to, someone to listen and someone who cares, because with this knowledge no other family will have to go through the pain suicide leaves. You are to be commended for the approach you have all taken and it helps me so much. So once again to a wonderful group of people in th football world out there Thank-you.
 
Harlequin said:
Yoda_ you are so right in relation to jumping on here. I wanted you to know that the post where you announced you were going to be a father still resonates within me and I thank you for sharing this news. I as many others on here were genuinely thrilled for you.

My 24yo son also carries the demon that is depression. His words that he can't imagine himself ever being happy and that he no longer wants to be here have shattered me but I haven't let him know that. I contact him every day just on trivial matters just to know he's ok.
The posters on here have gives me hope and especially you Yoda_ being in the same age demographic as my son.
Click to expand...

Thank you for the kind words. Having an 8.5 month old son has really opened my eyes up to the smaller things in life we often take for granted.


Its a shame that this generation seem unable to transmit there inner thoughts into words and actions that others are able to connect with. I watched a video last night that is all powerful and aww inspiring.


Powerful and very, very full on

 
The Scales said:
Its the Scales partner here again, still very unsure how to post on this site. Myself and the Scales and my daughters want to thank-you from the bottom of our hearts. All of the messages we have read here have helped us in so many ways, the warm wishes, kind words and recognition have made our hearts burst to know that the man we loved meant so much to you also. Already I read people opening up and sharing just a little of their own battles which makes this horrible loss we are facing just a little easier. I dont want to bore you but I do need you to know one thing and that is how much you all meant to the Scales. Only six weeks ago the Scales turned 50 and the girls (our daughters ) and I decided to buy him a new lap-top so he could spend more time with all of you. He carried that lap-top everywhere even to bed so as he could be a part of a community that he loved (and at times hated especially anyone that didnt love his beloved Bombers as much as he did). Words will never tell you all how much enjoyment and fun the Scales got from you all. So again we thank-you, and hugely respect you. In closing one thing I ask you all to tuck in your minds somewhere is the knowledge that there is always someone to talk to, someone to listen and someone who cares, because with this knowledge no other family will have to go through the pain suicide leaves. You are to be commended for the approach you have all taken and it helps me so much. So once again to a wonderful group of people in th football world out there Thank-you.
Click to expand...
Hello again- I hope you and your daughters are holding up as well as possible, considering the terrible circumstances.

It's touching to know our little rag-tag community here meant so much to Scales. I think the circumstances of the past two years have really accentuated that feeling for Essendon supporters on this site, too. The kingdom has been under assault on all its borders, so to speak. That togetherness has been tested at times, but the Essendon board on this particular site has been something of a safe haven, I suppose.

So it's touching to know that Scales valued that so much.

I can also assure you that he meant a lot to us. It is difficult to show that in the context of an online community, but the reactions you've seen here are partly because he was a poster who did leave his mark, and did so in an overwhelmingly positive way. He was very obviously possessed of a keen mind and intellect and his posts were always worth your time in reading- sometimes, that is, after you'd spent the necessary time deciphering the subtleties and complexities of his offerings and arguments, for he certainly crafted them better than most can.

I reiterate again- I cannot believe the strength and presence of mind you are showing in continuing to come here and talk with us- you must have so many things on your mind at the moment, so much grief to deal with, and so many things to organise. Yet here you are. I think I speak for everyone in saying we wouldn't have begrudged you in the slightest had you simply not had the time, or the stomach, to come here and inform us, and then to follow up today.

So, we should be the ones thanking you, Mrs Scales.

I cannot even begin to comprehend what you and your daughters must be going through right now, but if reading all that you have here has made things easier even slightly, or just put a smile on your face, then I'm very glad. Because everything that has been said in this thread has been heartfelt and sincere.

Once again, thank you and, if there is anything whatsoever we as a community can do for you and your daughters, please do not hesitate to either post in here or contact myself and the other Essendon moderators (Beerfish, VelvetSledge, Jab and Orazio2Joe) to discuss.

Regards
Doss
 

(Log in to remove this ad.)

Condolences to the family and friends who might read this thread, and to the wider EFC Board/bigfooty community.

This forum is the closest thing that many people have to a community, and although I never met Scales 'irl' I have probably read/considered his opinion on more occasions than many people I deal with daily.

Thanks to Scales' partner for informing us and although I am sure it has been said already in this thread and via PM, the bigfooty community, for all its flaws, can be amazing in times of need for people in this kind of situation; there is latent support here to be taken up if it is ever requested.
 
Saddened to receive this news. My condolences to The Scales family and friends, my thoughts are with you.

As others have mentioned The Scales was an excellent and valued poster on BF. When scrolling through a mountain of posts i'd always stop and read when I saw The Scales avatar show up on my screen.

RIP The Scales
 
The Scales said:
Its the Scales partner here again, still very unsure how to post on this site. Myself and the Scales and my daughters want to thank-you from the bottom of our hearts. All of the messages we have read here have helped us in so many ways, the warm wishes, kind words and recognition have made our hearts burst to know that the man we loved meant so much to you also. Already I read people opening up and sharing just a little of their own battles which makes this horrible loss we are facing just a little easier. I dont want to bore you but I do need you to know one thing and that is how much you all meant to the Scales. Only six weeks ago the Scales turned 50 and the girls (our daughters ) and I decided to buy him a new lap-top so he could spend more time with all of you. He carried that lap-top everywhere even to bed so as he could be a part of a community that he loved (and at times hated especially anyone that didnt love his beloved Bombers as much as he did). Words will never tell you all how much enjoyment and fun the Scales got from you all. So again we thank-you, and hugely respect you. In closing one thing I ask you all to tuck in your minds somewhere is the knowledge that there is always someone to talk to, someone to listen and someone who cares, because with this knowledge no other family will have to go through the pain suicide leaves. You are to be commended for the approach you have all taken and it helps me so much. So once again to a wonderful group of people in th football world out there Thank-you.
Click to expand...

Thanks again for sharing, gutsy extremely positive way to start moving on and coping with your loss....I applaud your stance and strength.....When I look at The Scales posts and glance over to his location on the left hand side, I really get the feeling that you helped him reach that moral high ground he spoke of...Credit to you....The bad memories will pass, the good memories will last forever..:rainbow:
 
Hate to hear about a fellow BF'er passing away. Condolences to all the family. I cannot imagine the grief of having a loved one pass in that manner, especially for the daughter who found him. I admire the courage of the family to make a thread such as this one and hope all who read it do their best to help those suffering from depression - it's a horrible illness.

RIP The Scales
 
The Scales said:
Its the Scales partner here again, still very unsure how to post on this site. Myself and the Scales and my daughters want to thank-you from the bottom of our hearts. All of the messages we have read here have helped us in so many ways, the warm wishes, kind words and recognition have made our hearts burst to know that the man we loved meant so much to you also. Already I read people opening up and sharing just a little of their own battles which makes this horrible loss we are facing just a little easier. I dont want to bore you but I do need you to know one thing and that is how much you all meant to the Scales. Only six weeks ago the Scales turned 50 and the girls (our daughters ) and I decided to buy him a new lap-top so he could spend more time with all of you. He carried that lap-top everywhere even to bed so as he could be a part of a community that he loved (and at times hated especially anyone that didnt love his beloved Bombers as much as he did). Words will never tell you all how much enjoyment and fun the Scales got from you all. So again we thank-you, and hugely respect you. In closing one thing I ask you all to tuck in your minds somewhere is the knowledge that there is always someone to talk to, someone to listen and someone who cares, because with this knowledge no other family will have to go through the pain suicide leaves. You are to be commended for the approach you have all taken and it helps me so much. So once again to a wonderful group of people in th football world out there Thank-you.
Click to expand...

Hello The Scales (partner)

Pretty confident I can say that our colours don't matter at this point in time and we all think you very brave to bring this sad news to us.
As much as it may clearly be of little comfort to you at this point in time, your consideration to bring this forward may just help others.
I guess what holds us back in helping others at times, is that there may be no gratification available, in that we may never see the net results of what a kind gesture, some nice words or a helping hand may bring about.
That's a pity that we need a gold star to do what we know to be right, so thank you for doing what you knew to be right.

Your efforts won't go astray and may the greatest of love keep your family strong and united.
Rest in Peace The Scales and live with love to the family.
 
Sad news. Having not been around BF a lot in the last 2 years i had not had much contact with The Scales but my heart goes out to his family and friends all the same. Not an easy ailment to deal with and it certainly takes a toll on you. Thankfully i have had the strength myself to pull through the bad days but it is never easy on the days where you feel everything is going wrong and there is no way out or fix.
RIP The Scales. Hope your journey is at ease now.
 
The Scales said:
Its the Scales partner here again, still very unsure how to post on this site. Myself and the Scales and my daughters want to thank-you from the bottom of our hearts. All of the messages we have read here have helped us in so many ways, the warm wishes, kind words and recognition have made our hearts burst to know that the man we loved meant so much to you also. Already I read people opening up and sharing just a little of their own battles which makes this horrible loss we are facing just a little easier. I dont want to bore you but I do need you to know one thing and that is how much you all meant to the Scales. Only six weeks ago the Scales turned 50 and the girls (our daughters ) and I decided to buy him a new lap-top so he could spend more time with all of you. He carried that lap-top everywhere even to bed so as he could be a part of a community that he loved (and at times hated especially anyone that didnt love his beloved Bombers as much as he did). Words will never tell you all how much enjoyment and fun the Scales got from you all. So again we thank-you, and hugely respect you. In closing one thing I ask you all to tuck in your minds somewhere is the knowledge that there is always someone to talk to, someone to listen and someone who cares, because with this knowledge no other family will have to go through the pain suicide leaves. You are to be commended for the approach you have all taken and it helps me so much. So once again to a wonderful group of people in th football world out there Thank-you.
Click to expand...
You're a remarkable lady and I wish you and your family all the best in the future.
 
The Scales said:
Hi Guys i am the partner of the Scales and I am not really sure how this site works but I will do my best. On Fri 28th Nov The Scales attempted to take his own life, after our daughter found him and administered CPR we were able to get him to hospital and he stayed in ICU for 5 days, on day 5 we lost him and the only joy that came out of this is that his organs were donated to many people. I wanted to let The Big Footy community know he loved this site almost as much as he loved EFC. The only other thing i want to say is if you feel down or depressed reach out there is always someone around to listen, men especially need to ask their mates if there ok because that simple question can save another family feeling the pain and anguish we are feeling. So on behalf of The Scales i say goodbye to you all. RIP my beautiful man
Click to expand...
I've read this paragraph time and time again and still am unsure on what to say, however I feel obliged to write a message. First of all, it was extremely brave of you to post this news as I can only imagine the pain you and you family and friends must be going through. The Scales' work on the ASADA page was and still is greatly appreciated by many of the users on BF and I often smiled at his jokes (my personal favourite was "if Steven Dank was a man-whore his name would be Steven Skank"). Once again, my condolences to you and all those involved in his life because I'm sure he is a tremendous loss.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Remove this Banner Ad

Back
Top