HoneyBadger35
They're not going to pick him, Mitch.
- Aug 11, 2011
- 28,150
- 79,312
- AFL Club
- West Coast
- Moderator
- #1
Picture this.
It’s 6:08pm on Saturday night. Earlier in the week, Richmond and Hawthorn played out a thrilling match in front of the 17 people in Victoria who managed to get work off the next day. Melbourne versus Geelong was mired in controversy, as the Demons were forced to play with just 21 players following Clayton Oliver’s sickening pre-game collision with the banner. Back inside Optus Stadium, a group of nearby fans discuss the latest score in the final between the AFL’s pet from New South Wales and the AFL’s pet from New South Wales.
That was all just the entrée, but this is the main event. The West Coast Eagles host the first AFL final in Optus Stadium history, on a Saturday night against the Collingwood Magpies. Excitement hangs in the air like Ashley Sampi at a sex swing convention.
Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: 60,000 fans not joining the huddle.
Last Time They Met:
In Round 17, the Eagles prepared for one of their most important games of the season. 2nd played 3rd at the club’s happiest hunting ground; the MCG. Collingwood entered the contest riding a seven game winning streak, while the Eagles sought to prove their mid-season wobble was truly in the rear-view mirror.
After looking absolutely shell-shocked out of the gates, some West Coast desperation and atrocious Collingwood accuracy saw the Eagles find themselves (somehow) ahead at half-time. After the main break, and in the cruellest of blows, Nic Naitanuiruptured his ‘good’ ACL, only bruised the bone so should be back any minute now, was fine, and everyone was happy.
The Eagles rallied, storming home with all the momentum to delete Collingwood’s account of seven consecutive victories, and claim a pivotal win. Josh Kennedy showed flashes of dominance in his return from a long absence, and the good times were rolling. Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: The hilarious 'Don't Blow It' image was actually from Eagles vs Pies in Round 17
Teams:
Since these teams last met, the Eagles have welcomed back Dom Sheed, Liam Ryan, Tom Barrass and Nathan Vardy, but have also been without the services of Nic Naitanui, Andrew Gaff, Jake Waterman and Tom Swift.
Mason Cox, a late out in Round 17, has returned to Collingwood’s line-up, with Matthew Scharenberg the only Magpie from the most recent Eagles clash guaranteed to miss on Saturday. Darcy Moore was outstanding for Collingwood in Round 17, but may miss due to an ongoing hamstring issue. Scott Pendlebury will be fine to play after battling illness, while Travis Varcoe has put his hand up to play through incredibly difficult circumstances.
Adam Simpson has an interesting decision to make, either persisting with the extremely tall Vardy-Lycett-Barrass-Schofield-McGovern-Darling-Kennedy group, or sacrificing height against a team featuring both a dominant ruckman and genetic mishap, Mason Cox.
Collingwood too have some looming choices, particularly regarding the return of several injured players; Adam Treloar, Jeremy Howe and Darcy Moore.
Moore did a phenomenal job on Josh Kennedy when the sides last met, and shapes as an extremely influential potential in, but faces an uphill battle to be ready in time. Howe seems the closest of the trio, and is sure to offer some much needed help to the thin Collingwood backline. Adam Treloar goes alright, but I refuse to talk about him as I’ve had it in for him ever since he did an interview bragging about how many NBA jerseys he owned. 100 isn’t that many for someone on an AFL salary Adam, get over yourself.
Pictured: Some clown selling fake gear down at the Queen Victoria markets.
Form:
After an incredible start to the season, the Eagles began to falter either side of their bye week, capping off their slump with an unbelievable fadeout against Adelaide. They have since rallied, claiming crucial wins over GWS and Collingwood to steady the ship.
However, an arrogant victory over Port Adelaide, a home loss to Melbourne and a workmanlike win against Brisbane aren’t as inspiring a form line as you would like heading into Sheptember. The Eagles have yet to truly settle in the absence of Andrew Gaff, but have enjoyed the newfound influence of Jamie Cripps, Liam Ryan and the human cheat code, Willie Rioli.
Collingwood have faced a similar slate of opponents as the Eagles, and could take away a fair amount of positivity from their late season form. Convincing victories over North Melbourne and Port Adelaide, plus a solid win against the Lions, has Collingwood looking very confident ahead of the finals. A pair of extremely competitive efforts against Richmond and Sydney means that the Pies’ last true letdown was in Round 17 against the Eagles.
One potential worry for the Pies is their Round 23 ‘victory’ over Fremantle in Perth – while a free look at Optus Stadium is of undeniable benefit, the performance on the day left plenty to be desired. Fortunately for Collingwood, Nat Fyfe was determined to get them over the line, allowing the Pies to finish safely in the top four.
Pictured: Willie Rioli heard you were talking shit.
By The Numbers:
The West Coast Eagles average 226.6 kicks per game, the highest figure across the AFL. Conversely, the Eagles rank dead last in the league in handballs per game (130.5) and 16th in disposals per game (357.1). Meanwhile, the Magpies lead the league in both handballs (185.8) and disposals (402.7).
West Coast boast a 14-1 record when Jack Darling takes one mark inside 50, and an impressive 9-0 when he takes at least three.
Steele Sidebottom recorded a season low 18 disposals when these sides last met, down significantly from his average across all other games (30.1 disposals).
Jeremy McGovern needs three more contested marks to break the Eagles’ all-time record for contested marks in a season (current record - 61 marks held by…Jeremy McGovern).
2nd > 3rd, proving mathematically that the Eagles will win. Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: Jack Darling, having just taken his third i50 mark of the day.
Burning Questions:
1. Can Josh Kennedy and Jack Darling recapture their best against a somewhat makeshift Collingwood backline?
2. Are Scott Lycett and Nathan Vardy still damp after their recent bath at the hands of Max Gawn? How will they deal with the other All-Australian ruckman, Brodie Grundy?
3. Has Mark Hutchings been living rent-free in Steele Sidebottom’s head for the last two months, or has he been paying amenities?
4. Can Cripps, Rioli and Ryan outscore De Goey, Greenwood and Hoskin-Elliott?
5. Will Adam Treloar make the trip to Perth? No, he won't.
6. Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: Steele Sidebottom in Round 17, after being put in the Hutch Clutch.
A sliding doors section that won’t make you sick a kill you:
If the Eagles can slow the game down and build through a short kicking approach, then clear your schedule for the following fortnight. Collingwood will look to make West Coast go with pace, but the methodical approach rendered the Pies ineffective in Round 17.
If Mark Hutchings goes to Steele Sidebottom, then Taylor Adams becomes the most important player in the midfield. Jack Redden will be crucial in curtailing the Pies midfield depth.
If the Eagles fall behind three to four goals early on, then take a deep breath. The slow starts have been frustrating, but this team has shown it can hang.
If Chris Mayne kicks a goal then under the Laws of the Game, the Eagles must hand back their licence.
If something inconveniences you slightly between now and Saturday, then boo until you get dizzy. Train how you play.
Pictured: You, if you have a spine.
Predictions
There are a million different ways this game could go. The Eagles have not been in red-hot form since the derby, though will be buoyed by the return of Josh Kennedy and a backs-against-the-wall victory against Collingwood earlier in the year. The Pies have battled a significant injury list and have proven they can mix it up with the best, but stumbled last week and will travel to Perth twice in a season for the first time since 2007.
While Collingwood’s exceptional midfield and dynamic forward setup will stretch West Coast, a disciplined performance, with the strength of the Eagles’ spine, should see the good guys book a prelim final berth. This really could be one of the most entertaining games of the year, but **** that, it’s finals; just win baby. Eagles by 26.
Tl;dr - Up the bloody Coasters!
It’s 6:08pm on Saturday night. Earlier in the week, Richmond and Hawthorn played out a thrilling match in front of the 17 people in Victoria who managed to get work off the next day. Melbourne versus Geelong was mired in controversy, as the Demons were forced to play with just 21 players following Clayton Oliver’s sickening pre-game collision with the banner. Back inside Optus Stadium, a group of nearby fans discuss the latest score in the final between the AFL’s pet from New South Wales and the AFL’s pet from New South Wales.
That was all just the entrée, but this is the main event. The West Coast Eagles host the first AFL final in Optus Stadium history, on a Saturday night against the Collingwood Magpies. Excitement hangs in the air like Ashley Sampi at a sex swing convention.
Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: 60,000 fans not joining the huddle.
Last Time They Met:
In Round 17, the Eagles prepared for one of their most important games of the season. 2nd played 3rd at the club’s happiest hunting ground; the MCG. Collingwood entered the contest riding a seven game winning streak, while the Eagles sought to prove their mid-season wobble was truly in the rear-view mirror.
After looking absolutely shell-shocked out of the gates, some West Coast desperation and atrocious Collingwood accuracy saw the Eagles find themselves (somehow) ahead at half-time. After the main break, and in the cruellest of blows, Nic Naitanui
The Eagles rallied, storming home with all the momentum to delete Collingwood’s account of seven consecutive victories, and claim a pivotal win. Josh Kennedy showed flashes of dominance in his return from a long absence, and the good times were rolling. Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: The hilarious 'Don't Blow It' image was actually from Eagles vs Pies in Round 17
Since these teams last met, the Eagles have welcomed back Dom Sheed, Liam Ryan, Tom Barrass and Nathan Vardy, but have also been without the services of Nic Naitanui, Andrew Gaff, Jake Waterman and Tom Swift.
Mason Cox, a late out in Round 17, has returned to Collingwood’s line-up, with Matthew Scharenberg the only Magpie from the most recent Eagles clash guaranteed to miss on Saturday. Darcy Moore was outstanding for Collingwood in Round 17, but may miss due to an ongoing hamstring issue. Scott Pendlebury will be fine to play after battling illness, while Travis Varcoe has put his hand up to play through incredibly difficult circumstances.
Adam Simpson has an interesting decision to make, either persisting with the extremely tall Vardy-Lycett-Barrass-Schofield-McGovern-Darling-Kennedy group, or sacrificing height against a team featuring both a dominant ruckman and genetic mishap, Mason Cox.
Collingwood too have some looming choices, particularly regarding the return of several injured players; Adam Treloar, Jeremy Howe and Darcy Moore.
Moore did a phenomenal job on Josh Kennedy when the sides last met, and shapes as an extremely influential potential in, but faces an uphill battle to be ready in time. Howe seems the closest of the trio, and is sure to offer some much needed help to the thin Collingwood backline. Adam Treloar goes alright, but I refuse to talk about him as I’ve had it in for him ever since he did an interview bragging about how many NBA jerseys he owned. 100 isn’t that many for someone on an AFL salary Adam, get over yourself.
Pictured: Some clown selling fake gear down at the Queen Victoria markets.
Form:
After an incredible start to the season, the Eagles began to falter either side of their bye week, capping off their slump with an unbelievable fadeout against Adelaide. They have since rallied, claiming crucial wins over GWS and Collingwood to steady the ship.
However, an arrogant victory over Port Adelaide, a home loss to Melbourne and a workmanlike win against Brisbane aren’t as inspiring a form line as you would like heading into Sheptember. The Eagles have yet to truly settle in the absence of Andrew Gaff, but have enjoyed the newfound influence of Jamie Cripps, Liam Ryan and the human cheat code, Willie Rioli.
Collingwood have faced a similar slate of opponents as the Eagles, and could take away a fair amount of positivity from their late season form. Convincing victories over North Melbourne and Port Adelaide, plus a solid win against the Lions, has Collingwood looking very confident ahead of the finals. A pair of extremely competitive efforts against Richmond and Sydney means that the Pies’ last true letdown was in Round 17 against the Eagles.
One potential worry for the Pies is their Round 23 ‘victory’ over Fremantle in Perth – while a free look at Optus Stadium is of undeniable benefit, the performance on the day left plenty to be desired. Fortunately for Collingwood, Nat Fyfe was determined to get them over the line, allowing the Pies to finish safely in the top four.
Pictured: Willie Rioli heard you were talking shit.
By The Numbers:
The West Coast Eagles average 226.6 kicks per game, the highest figure across the AFL. Conversely, the Eagles rank dead last in the league in handballs per game (130.5) and 16th in disposals per game (357.1). Meanwhile, the Magpies lead the league in both handballs (185.8) and disposals (402.7).
West Coast boast a 14-1 record when Jack Darling takes one mark inside 50, and an impressive 9-0 when he takes at least three.
Steele Sidebottom recorded a season low 18 disposals when these sides last met, down significantly from his average across all other games (30.1 disposals).
Jeremy McGovern needs three more contested marks to break the Eagles’ all-time record for contested marks in a season (current record - 61 marks held by…Jeremy McGovern).
2nd > 3rd, proving mathematically that the Eagles will win. Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: Jack Darling, having just taken his third i50 mark of the day.
Burning Questions:
1. Can Josh Kennedy and Jack Darling recapture their best against a somewhat makeshift Collingwood backline?
2. Are Scott Lycett and Nathan Vardy still damp after their recent bath at the hands of Max Gawn? How will they deal with the other All-Australian ruckman, Brodie Grundy?
3. Has Mark Hutchings been living rent-free in Steele Sidebottom’s head for the last two months, or has he been paying amenities?
4. Can Cripps, Rioli and Ryan outscore De Goey, Greenwood and Hoskin-Elliott?
5. Will Adam Treloar make the trip to Perth? No, he won't.
6. Up the bloody Coasters.
Pictured: Steele Sidebottom in Round 17, after being put in the Hutch Clutch.
A sliding doors section that won’t make you sick a kill you:
If the Eagles can slow the game down and build through a short kicking approach, then clear your schedule for the following fortnight. Collingwood will look to make West Coast go with pace, but the methodical approach rendered the Pies ineffective in Round 17.
If Mark Hutchings goes to Steele Sidebottom, then Taylor Adams becomes the most important player in the midfield. Jack Redden will be crucial in curtailing the Pies midfield depth.
If the Eagles fall behind three to four goals early on, then take a deep breath. The slow starts have been frustrating, but this team has shown it can hang.
If Chris Mayne kicks a goal then under the Laws of the Game, the Eagles must hand back their licence.
If something inconveniences you slightly between now and Saturday, then boo until you get dizzy. Train how you play.
Pictured: You, if you have a spine.
Predictions
There are a million different ways this game could go. The Eagles have not been in red-hot form since the derby, though will be buoyed by the return of Josh Kennedy and a backs-against-the-wall victory against Collingwood earlier in the year. The Pies have battled a significant injury list and have proven they can mix it up with the best, but stumbled last week and will travel to Perth twice in a season for the first time since 2007.
While Collingwood’s exceptional midfield and dynamic forward setup will stretch West Coast, a disciplined performance, with the strength of the Eagles’ spine, should see the good guys book a prelim final berth. This really could be one of the most entertaining games of the year, but **** that, it’s finals; just win baby. Eagles by 26.
Tl;dr - Up the bloody Coasters!
Last edited:
) just feel like anything short of making the GF from here is a wasted season.
