Dear flogs,
The U.N. Security Council is holding a special meeting as I type to try and work out how to respond to Stretcher-Gate. Ban Ki Moon has been up all night on the phone to Eddie Maguire and Justin Leppitch, and he can't rule out sanctions over the incident. Here's a trasnscript I received from ASIO of their conversations:
JL: Hello, is that Banksy Moon?
BKM: Herro, who is this?
JL: Justin Leppitch, mate, from Australia, gotta talk to you urgently about Stretcher-Gate.
BKM: Solly, who are you?
JL: Dude, it's Leppo, coach of the Brisbane Lions-
BKM: Ah, are you linging about Aleppo? The UN vote on Syria is not until Wednesday-
JL: Mate! I'm ringing about bloody (sound of scuffles in the background, and then the phone is wrenched from Leppitch)...Hello, Ban Ki, it's Eddie Maguire here, president of Collingwood...
BKM: Solly, but I have no countly risted under Corringwood? Are you a protectorate?
EM: Protected, you've got to kidding mate! You gotta wear red and white for that to happen-
BKM: Oh, led and white! Is this a tellitorial matter between Japan and-
EM: Ban, pull your head in mate! (Leppitch can be heard in the background telling Eddie to calm down) Ireland's been a complete cun-
BKM: Oh Irerand! Solly, this is E.U. matter, we have a vote coming up on that next month.
EM: Stretcher!!! Stretcher-GATE, you dopey bastard, can't you hear me!
BKM: Solly, free a.m. here, I'm vely tired. Must go, good ruck with Stletcher.
Call ended.
The U.N. Security Council is holding a special meeting as I type to try and work out how to respond to Stretcher-Gate. Ban Ki Moon has been up all night on the phone to Eddie Maguire and Justin Leppitch, and he can't rule out sanctions over the incident. Here's a trasnscript I received from ASIO of their conversations:
JL: Hello, is that Banksy Moon?
BKM: Herro, who is this?
JL: Justin Leppitch, mate, from Australia, gotta talk to you urgently about Stretcher-Gate.
BKM: Solly, who are you?
JL: Dude, it's Leppo, coach of the Brisbane Lions-
BKM: Ah, are you linging about Aleppo? The UN vote on Syria is not until Wednesday-
JL: Mate! I'm ringing about bloody (sound of scuffles in the background, and then the phone is wrenched from Leppitch)...Hello, Ban Ki, it's Eddie Maguire here, president of Collingwood...
BKM: Solly, but I have no countly risted under Corringwood? Are you a protectorate?
EM: Protected, you've got to kidding mate! You gotta wear red and white for that to happen-
BKM: Oh, led and white! Is this a tellitorial matter between Japan and-
EM: Ban, pull your head in mate! (Leppitch can be heard in the background telling Eddie to calm down) Ireland's been a complete cun-
BKM: Oh Irerand! Solly, this is E.U. matter, we have a vote coming up on that next month.
EM: Stretcher!!! Stretcher-GATE, you dopey bastard, can't you hear me!
BKM: Solly, free a.m. here, I'm vely tired. Must go, good ruck with Stletcher.
Call ended.
This kind of racism is best kept in-house.
