- Apr 26, 2016
- 39,865
- 82,216
- AFL Club
- Sydney
- Moderator
- #1
"Captain's log, stardate 160824. Our destination is a strange planet known as 'Marvel', with a peculiar roof above it that makes every game there look like it's being played at a vacant Bunnings Warehouse. What say you, Spock?"
"I think you're right, Spock. Oh well, at least you left one of those clubs and are now playing for - Oh."
It is in this spirit that we venture to this planet to go where no team has ever gone before... To top spot on the ladder after being 13-1 but then being incredibly shit and then nearly blowing our near-four-game lead on the ladder and then playing our best footy for about 10 minutes and finally securing our top spot. This bloke has put less people through cardiac-related ordeals than the Sydney Swans:
The Context
This is a must-win game for Essendon if they want to play finals. They'll likely finish the game inside the top eight but only by the skin of their teeth. It is a kiiiiinda-must-win game for us. Our top two spot is not locked in yet, so we need to win at least one more game still, but we're a better chance of beating Adelaide in the final round, as it will be at home for us and the Crows players will likely be already mentally planning what cocktails they are going to order at their swim-up bars in Bali during September.
We've had a funny season. Looked impenetrable for 14 weeks of the season, then rudderless for the next four, and then we looked like Essendon for two weeks, and then had a weird game against Collingwood that was, in all honesty, pretty shite, but was bookended by two 10-minute bursts at the start and end of the game where we resembled our best versions again and that was enough to get us the most unlikely of wins. So who are we? What are the Bloods of 2024? Does 'the Bloods' still exist?
Essendon have also had a funny season, but they always have a funny season. They are a funny club. No matter how much I might hate them, they simply must stay in the competition for the laughs. Between cost of living, climate change, the potential of World War III on the horizon, it's important that we try to keep morale high. So thank you, Essendon. Truly.
The Game
As much as they are fun to take the mickey out of, I actually quite like what Brad Scott has done with Essendon this year. The media will have you believe that they have at least 8 Scott Pendleburys and 5 Gary Ablett Jrs in their team, so they've massively underperformed not finishing top 2/4 this year. But when I look at their best team, they are about where they should be on the ladder. They've had some great wins and some terrible losses, but Scott's managed to at least give them a different sort of look as a team, if not necessarily different results just yet.
Sam Durham and Jye Caldwell have been handy additions, providing the Bombers with some much needed grunt in the midfield - the keg to their notoriously soft underbelly. Just on Caldwell, I once predicted that he would become the best player of the 2018 draft. Yes, the draft that included such esteemed names like Sam Walsh, Connor Rozee, Zak Butters and Izak Rankine. So that's the kind of foresight and wisdom you can expect from this caesar88 preview. To be fair, it's not my fault. I don't think anyone saw it coming that the best player from the 2018 draft would be Hayden McLean.
Essendon do have a bit of a scary forward line, because with the right supply, they have two spearheads that are very different in style and play, but also just very different from the standard forward spearheads that the back six in most teams prepare for. Kyle Langford (39 goals) is a 192cm guy who, in theory, should be little more than a quality second or third tall, yet he's kicked multiple goals in 14 of his 20 games this year, and 3+ on seven occasions. He's nifty and athletic for his size, and can be quite classy at times. And Jake Stringer (38 goals) is almost like a midfielder/forward hybrid in the I. Heeney mould, and while he may look like he's smuggling yoga mats around his body under his guernsey, he can rip a game apart. I mean, so can James Rose, but it's still worth mentioning, I guess.
It will be a tough challenge for our back-line, which looked in all sorts at times throughout the Collingwood game. I can forgive our defenders for letting the renowned goalkicker Isaac Quaynor score a goal against them, but Mason Cox?? Really??
Hopefully another game back for Sir Dane, plus the return of Melican will alleviate some of these concerns.
For us, it will really be as simple as the midfield being competitive. There is so much talent in there that all they have to do is simply not roll over and die as they did in previous weeks. Give us enough supply, enough possession and chance to move the ball and get repeat entries into the forward line, and we will give ourselves enough looks.
The Changes
If I'm not mistaken, I think this may be the week we get Lewis Melican back. He probably comes in for one of Cleary (who was the starting sub) or Fox (who was subbed off.) There were a number of guys out there against Collingwood who I had simply no idea what the point of them was, except to annoy me - headlined by Mills, but also including Florent, Campbell, Adams. However I think Cleary or Fox are more likely omissions for Melican in Horse's eyes.
The VFL team had a good win, but Horse's "one of the best wins" rhetoric after the Pies match makes me think we won't go with any unforced changes to that team.
Could someone be rested? I identified five key players who I thought would most need a "rest" on the run home - Grundy, Blakey, Heeney, Rowbottom & Melican. The latter three have all had their turns due to injuries & suspension, but whether we dare manage Grundy or Blakey when top two isn't secured is another matter. Methinks if we get the win here, we might see a management in the final round of the season.
The Verdict
Swans by 416 points.
"I think you're right, Spock. Oh well, at least you left one of those clubs and are now playing for - Oh."
It is in this spirit that we venture to this planet to go where no team has ever gone before... To top spot on the ladder after being 13-1 but then being incredibly shit and then nearly blowing our near-four-game lead on the ladder and then playing our best footy for about 10 minutes and finally securing our top spot. This bloke has put less people through cardiac-related ordeals than the Sydney Swans:
The Context
This is a must-win game for Essendon if they want to play finals. They'll likely finish the game inside the top eight but only by the skin of their teeth. It is a kiiiiinda-must-win game for us. Our top two spot is not locked in yet, so we need to win at least one more game still, but we're a better chance of beating Adelaide in the final round, as it will be at home for us and the Crows players will likely be already mentally planning what cocktails they are going to order at their swim-up bars in Bali during September.
We've had a funny season. Looked impenetrable for 14 weeks of the season, then rudderless for the next four, and then we looked like Essendon for two weeks, and then had a weird game against Collingwood that was, in all honesty, pretty shite, but was bookended by two 10-minute bursts at the start and end of the game where we resembled our best versions again and that was enough to get us the most unlikely of wins. So who are we? What are the Bloods of 2024? Does 'the Bloods' still exist?
Essendon have also had a funny season, but they always have a funny season. They are a funny club. No matter how much I might hate them, they simply must stay in the competition for the laughs. Between cost of living, climate change, the potential of World War III on the horizon, it's important that we try to keep morale high. So thank you, Essendon. Truly.
The Game
As much as they are fun to take the mickey out of, I actually quite like what Brad Scott has done with Essendon this year. The media will have you believe that they have at least 8 Scott Pendleburys and 5 Gary Ablett Jrs in their team, so they've massively underperformed not finishing top 2/4 this year. But when I look at their best team, they are about where they should be on the ladder. They've had some great wins and some terrible losses, but Scott's managed to at least give them a different sort of look as a team, if not necessarily different results just yet.
Sam Durham and Jye Caldwell have been handy additions, providing the Bombers with some much needed grunt in the midfield - the keg to their notoriously soft underbelly. Just on Caldwell, I once predicted that he would become the best player of the 2018 draft. Yes, the draft that included such esteemed names like Sam Walsh, Connor Rozee, Zak Butters and Izak Rankine. So that's the kind of foresight and wisdom you can expect from this caesar88 preview. To be fair, it's not my fault. I don't think anyone saw it coming that the best player from the 2018 draft would be Hayden McLean.
Essendon do have a bit of a scary forward line, because with the right supply, they have two spearheads that are very different in style and play, but also just very different from the standard forward spearheads that the back six in most teams prepare for. Kyle Langford (39 goals) is a 192cm guy who, in theory, should be little more than a quality second or third tall, yet he's kicked multiple goals in 14 of his 20 games this year, and 3+ on seven occasions. He's nifty and athletic for his size, and can be quite classy at times. And Jake Stringer (38 goals) is almost like a midfielder/forward hybrid in the I. Heeney mould, and while he may look like he's smuggling yoga mats around his body under his guernsey, he can rip a game apart. I mean, so can James Rose, but it's still worth mentioning, I guess.
It will be a tough challenge for our back-line, which looked in all sorts at times throughout the Collingwood game. I can forgive our defenders for letting the renowned goalkicker Isaac Quaynor score a goal against them, but Mason Cox?? Really??
Hopefully another game back for Sir Dane, plus the return of Melican will alleviate some of these concerns.
For us, it will really be as simple as the midfield being competitive. There is so much talent in there that all they have to do is simply not roll over and die as they did in previous weeks. Give us enough supply, enough possession and chance to move the ball and get repeat entries into the forward line, and we will give ourselves enough looks.
The Changes
If I'm not mistaken, I think this may be the week we get Lewis Melican back. He probably comes in for one of Cleary (who was the starting sub) or Fox (who was subbed off.) There were a number of guys out there against Collingwood who I had simply no idea what the point of them was, except to annoy me - headlined by Mills, but also including Florent, Campbell, Adams. However I think Cleary or Fox are more likely omissions for Melican in Horse's eyes.
The VFL team had a good win, but Horse's "one of the best wins" rhetoric after the Pies match makes me think we won't go with any unforced changes to that team.
Could someone be rested? I identified five key players who I thought would most need a "rest" on the run home - Grundy, Blakey, Heeney, Rowbottom & Melican. The latter three have all had their turns due to injuries & suspension, but whether we dare manage Grundy or Blakey when top two isn't secured is another matter. Methinks if we get the win here, we might see a management in the final round of the season.
The Verdict
Swans by 416 points.
