Things you hear at the game.

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I remember in my 20's I was at the G watching my beloved Tigers smashing the blues. Anyway, I was a tad vocal and after a brown from the blues got driven into the ground I yelled out " My god! did you see Browns tampon squirt out?". I got a few chuckles from the tigers around me but this old lady, a blue supporter turned around and unloaded on me. Called me every swear word under the sun. I was shocked, as being a young wog, women, particularly old women did not swear.

While she was yelling and cussing at me, I could not help but focus on her beard she had growing on her chin. After she was done I just told her, she needed to do two things, one, stop swearing and two shave :p. She shut up after that lol
I copped an earful from an old granny blue supporter one game whilst i was doing security "black bomber" in the 90's, anyway announcements were constantly made during the last quarter for patrons not to run on the ground after the siren until the players were off...Final siren blows this woman and her daughter decide to jump the fence and that's when i grabbed them both and as I'm telling this woman off an old bag yells at me "oh he's just a wog bastard"....blah blah wog bastard, blah blah wog bastard...had enough i told to her shut up you old bat!, then steps in her very brave son or grand son and threatens to bash me after the game i tell him i'll be waiting for you here mate...second siren goes the players are safe and in the rooms so i let the girls go and the tough guy goes missing in action, grand ma's all quiet...lol you have to laugh at the feral carltank supporters their bark is bigger than their bite.
 
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About two years ago i was on the fence at a tigers/shemons game. Young fella was with me. Man i gave it to Mitch Clarke that game. The old favourites like geez "nice $30,000 handball there champ. That kick cost $60k and you shanked it, you're shit, etc, etc". Nek minnit he has depression
:(
Last year before the dreamtime game, i was on the fence with my Tigers of old buddies at PRO , and Elton was playing on some hipster dickwad with a Napolean Dynamite hair cut. The Essendon kid screwed up, so i went to the fence and told Todd "go on Todd, tell him how shit he is, etc etc". Big Toddy turned around and gave the best smile. He was loving it.


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Playing the hawks early 2000s,we were ok,they were horrible.
Leading by plenty,hawks supporter behind me was sick of them turning it over by hand.
Random hawk takes a mark & looks to handball,queue fan from 2 rows back:

"FFS just kick it spermhead"

never forget it

seth
 

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Went to a Hawthorn game a few years ago and every time the hawks won the ball back some guy behind me would yell at the top of his voice "KICK IT TO CYRIL!" Didn't matter where on the ground it was, or even if Cyril was on the bench, it was the same every time. Was pretty hilarious after a while.
 
Best thing I ever heard was on a very cold Friday night at the MCG in the early 90s when we were getting absolutely belted by Fitzroy.
It was when the MCG was being redeveloped so there was a large contingent of Richmond supporters up on level 2 crammed into a pretty small area.
After Richard Osborne kicked his 8th deep into last quarter, a kid who would have been about 8-years-old stood up and said:
"You call yourself a champion Osborne? You're not a ****en champion. If you were a champion you would have kicked 12 by now against these bunch of ******s."
100% true story. It was the highlight of a bad night.
 
I come up with some pearlers in front of the TV at home, which to repeat here would simply be a paragraph of asterisks... :oops:
 
Thread has potential. Should keep this pinned for contributions over the course of the season.

Me and my family have had the same reserved seats at the G for about 8 seasons now and we have this bloke who sits behind us who fancies himself as a bit of a footy brain- just chats all game and makes really obvious statements as if he is a genius:

"Gee, Brett Deledio is quick"
"Dustin Martins fend off is really strong"
"Newman is starting to get old".

It used to really bother me but now me and my brother just look at each other and laugh
 
Went to a Hawthorn game a few years ago and every time the hawks won the ball back some guy behind me would yell at the top of his voice "KICK IT TO CYRIL!" Didn't matter where on the ground it was, or even if Cyril was on the bench, it was the same every time. Was pretty hilarious after a while.

I was at a Richmond vs Carlton game with my Old Man (****ing Collingwood supporter and skilled loud-mouth), sitting behind a Carlton supporter who was doing the same thing, but shouting "KICK IT TO FEV!", no matter where the ball was. Same response. Initially annoying, then funny.

We were up at half-time, cruising, with Fevola well held, and the ball mostly down the Richmond end, anyway.

Sometime in the third quarter, Nick Stevens streamed through the middle, and sent a bullet onto Fevola's chest. And he dropped the chest mark. My dickhead Old Man seized his moment, and shouted "KICK IT TO FEV!" He got some s******s, and a dirty look from the Carlton clown.

In the last quarter, the Carlton midfield continually kicked it to Fevola, who started converting. All around us, people started shouting "KICK IT TO FEV!" The Cheats came from behind and ****ing won. I didn't speak to my Old Man all the way home.
 
I copped an earful from an old granny blue supporter one game whilst i was doing security "black bomber" in the 90's, anyway announcements were constantly made during the last quarter for patrons not to run on the ground after the siren until the players were off...Final siren blows this woman and her daughter decide to jump the fence and that's when i grabbed them both and as I'm telling this woman off an old bag yells at me "oh he's just a wog bastard"....blah blah wog bastard, blah blah wog bastard...had enough i told to her shut up you old bat!, then steps in her very brave son or grand son and threatens to bash me after the game i tell him i'll be waiting for you here mate...second siren goes the players are safe and in the rooms so i let the girls go and the tough guy goes missing in action, grand ma's all quiet...lol you have to laugh at the feral carltank supporters their bark is bigger than their bite.

You showed some restraint... I would have given that old bat's smartass son a palm to the throat Clarko style
 

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Got an interesting twist to this thread.

I was at the Richmond v Adelaide game last year in the afl members with old man. There was a passionate richmond supporter who would shout out things like, "cmon tigers dont kick it backswards, it doesnt work" & "dont try to be fancy grigg your not that talented". I loled at that one. We never heard him swear, and both of us though he was just barracking. So we were quite shocked to see that just before half time security tapped him on the shoulder and told him to keep it down... It was really disheartening...
 
Got an interesting twist to this thread.

I was at the Richmond v Adelaide game last year in the afl members with old man. There was a passionate richmond supporter who would shout out things like, "cmon tigers dont kick it backswards, it doesnt work" & "dont try to be fancy grigg your not that talented". I loled at that one. We never heard him swear, and both of us though he was just barracking. So we were quite shocked to see that just before half time security tapped him on the shoulder and told him to keep it down... It was really disheartening...

It's only ok in general entry areas
 
Took my son to the MCG he had 3 mates with him,cant remember who we played but long time ago.Lady sitting in front soon as the game started she clapped her hands and yelled out "..Go tiger boys get the wooly woofters...Go tiger boys get the wooly woofters...Still laughing and we still say it
 
I sit next to the biggest ******* of a Richmond supporter on level 2.

Guy is a complete knob and yells out like a ******* idiot every game. Towards the end of last year the guy was yelling so loudly that the guy in front of him asked to him calm down and stop screaming in his ear.

The idiot then cracked the shits and stormed off, leaving the game early.
I can think of a few candidates that post regularly on here. :D

1994 I think it was, we were playing Geelong at Princes Park, bloody freezing sitting on those shitty concrete things they had for seats. Some bloke yells out, "You're an ugly man Hocking."
Haha, ugly Cats. Cats towelling us up, as usual, Ling getting heaps of it and a mate yells out "you're the only league footballer that can't get a root, Ling!", even the Cats fans laughed.
 
Mid 90's my mate and I were at an Eagles v Hawks game at Subi back when it was just a grass hill and concrete on the wing. We were in the pocket and Karl dickhead Langdon took a mark in the forward line. He went back to take a shot at goal, Mate yells out "Kick it to me" from the TV ad going around at the time. Langdon shanks the kick right into the pocket where we were sitting in. LOL'd the rest of the game and all the way home.

Although it also backfires

Same mate and I went to a West Coast v Collingwood game at Subi, Sumich drops a chest mark about 40 out near the boundry, same mate yells out "you're shit Sumich" Sumich gathers the spilt ball archs around on his left from 50 and bangs it through the middle. Made the Eagles supporters around us laugh all game.
 
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Mid 90's my mate and I were at an Eagles v Hawks game at Subi back when it was just a grass hill and concrete on the wing.

About that time, I was at a Tigers game at Subi, and when the Tiges ran through the banner, the chant went up:

"We hate you because you're a Victorian" (claaaap, claaaap, clapclapclap clapclapclap pause clap clap)

Do they still do that?
 
Two years ago when McGuane had kicked 2 + taken a speccy in the first quarter v the Saints. We had the ball about 80m out and everyone was silent, then suddenly I just hear a guy at the top of his lungs "ISOLATE MCGUANE". Simple but effective.


OMFG THAT WAS ME. I used to have a raft of McGuane calls.

"Isolate McGuane."
"Release the McGuane."
"You're my favourite player Luke McGuane."
"Put McGuane in the Ruck."
"McGuane the Distributor." - reserved for handballs.

& many more favourites, all delivered as loud as I could possibly yell.
 
I can recall a game at the MCG where i abused Phil Matera every chance i got. I believe my theme of the day was being a manchild/oompa loompa midget.
He killed us :(


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I can recall a game at the MCG where i abused Phil Matera every chance i got. I believe my theme of the day was being a manchild/oompa loompa midget.
He killed us :(


Sent from my iPad using righteous Bhodi manpower

LOL god I hated that little prick ... always off the back of a pack kicking an easy goal then runs back doing his little puncy handclap.
 
LOL god I hated that little prick ... always off the back of a pack kicking an easy goal then runs back doing his little puncy handclap.

Yep. Wasn’t really big on putting his head over the ball. Outside receiver type. I couldn’t stand him. ****ing stupid man child.


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Things you hear at the game.

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