Exe Gesis
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What nonsense is he talking about? he was the one who deleted all Cardinals imagery from his account without a word.
There is an ESPN Daily podcast episode on the Pottsville Maroons, and the curse of the CardinalsReddit link
Are the Arizona Cardinals cursed? An Investigation.
The longest championship drought in professional American sports belongs to the Arizona Cardinals, who have gain the honor by virtue of having last won it all in 1947 (second place are the Cleveland Indians Commanders Guardians, who won the World Series a year later). When success is elusive for so long, people tend to look to more mystical reasons why their team is unable to win a championship, and so we have curses, real and fake. Most sports curses are fake and are readily explained by bad ownership and bad luck (“luck” being a catch-all term for coincidence and nothing more than that). But some are real, and while they can be broken, this requires a good deal of power. The most well-known American sports curse is probably the Billy Goat curse placed on the Chicago Cubs, where a man who was prevented from bringing his pet goat to Wrigley in 1945 cursed the team to never again win the NL pennant. This curse was finally broken in 2016, and if you don’t think that 2016 was a year full of dark magic then I don’t know what to tell you. Our goal today is to determine if the Cardinals are cursed, and if they are, how to break that curse.
-- The Pottsville Theory --
Most discussion of a Cardinals curse centers around the disputed championship in 1925 - one of only two that they won. There was no official Championship Game in 1925 - whoever had the best record at the end of the season was the champion. With the season coming to an end and the Cardinals tied for first place with the Pottsville Maroons, the Cardinals scheduled a game with the Milwaukee Badgers so that a champion could be determined. But the Badgers had run out of cash for the year and couldn’t afford to field their team, so one of the Cardinals players recruited a bunch of Milwaukee-area high schoolers to play for the Badgers. Unsurprisingly, the Cardinals crushed the high school team 58-0.
Pottsville had a similar-but-different strategy - rather than playing an out-of-cash pro team or a high school team, they scheduled a game against Notre Dame. Notre Dame had gone 7-2-1 that year and was easily one of the best teams in college football, but Pottsville won the game on a last-second field goal. This was actually a really big deal and helped to legitimize the NFL, which in 1925 was still trying to make a case for its own existence.
Faced with having to decide which of these was a legitimate victory, the NFL president annulled both results and fined the cardinals $1000, but then decided that because Notre Dame was in the territory of another NFL team, the Maroons had broken NFL rules in scheduling the game. The championship was therefore awarded to the Cardinals. Pottsville (home to Yuengling and presumably other things?) Is still mad about it.
So here is the Curse Theory: the Cardinals should not have been champions in 1925, and by unjustly claiming the championship, they have brought a curse upon themselves. This curse can only be lifted by returning the championship to Pottsville.
There are several problems with this. First, this wasn’t a unilateral decision by the Cardinals that they would be champions, it was a decision by the NFL. Second, this is not the only disputed NFL championship. Only four years earlier, the Decatur Staleys (now the Chicago Bears) stole a championship from Buffalo, and the Bears are decidedly not cursed - they’ve won many times since 1921 and I don’t think you’ll meet a single Bears fan who blames the current state of the team on a curse rather than incompetent ownership. And third and most importantly, the Cardinals did actually win a championship in 1947. Partisans of the Pottsville Curse like to point to an NFL vote in 1963 that cemented the Cardinals as 1925 champions, but again, this was a league-wide vote and it wasn’t particularly close. So let’s talk about that 1947 championship and see if we can find anything mystical.
-- 1947 --
Starting in 1933, the NFL moved to a championship-game system. And in 1947, the Cardinals played the Philadelphia Eagles for the championship. The Cardinals had started 1947 by paying an unprecedented amount of money for an all-star backfield, and went into the championship game as heavy favorites over Philadelphia. In addition to the talent, the 1947 title game had a couple other things going on that favored the Cardinals.
First, the game was played in Chicago, at the Cardinals home of Comiskey Park. And second, the report of the game in the Chicago Tribune mentions that the Eagles began the game wearing cleats, but the referees didn’t like the look of them, penalized the Eagles for “illegal equipment”, and made them change into basketball shoes instead. Despite these advantages, the Cardinals almost lost. They got six first downs the whole game and had an utterly anemic passing attack. Luckily, four of those first downs involved the million-dollar backfield avoiding tackles from the basketball-shoe clad defense. Cardinals scored four touchdowns on runs of 44 yards, 70 yards, 75 yards, and 70 yards. Eagles played a normal game and had a normal box score, scoring three touchdowns, but that wasn’t enough. Cardinals 28, Eagles 21. NFL champions.
Clearly, someone had their thumb on the scale for this game. The Cardinals should not have won, and given every advantage in the book barely managed to pull it out. Rather than this game disproving a curse, I think it actually supports the existence of one. But it also supports the existence of a powerful force supporting the Cardinals and trying its best to break them through.
So what to do with this? Is this really the result of the Pottsville game? Our firm answer is no. This goes much, much deeper.
-- Football and Arizona --
Football is obviously ingrained in the heart of America. But when we say that, we generally mean that football is the most popular sport, and speaks to the American desire to watch large men run into each other. But what if we mean that literally? That football, and these teams in particular, were always at the center of America, just waiting to be discovered? Then we could extrapolate to say that, although the Arizona Cardinals did not move to the Phoenix area until the late 80s, they were never not the Arizona Cardinals.
And with that principal in mind, we find a striking correlation between the development of the Cardinals, and football in particular, and the development of the Phoenix area.
Phoenix was first settled by Americans in 1867 when Jack Swilling, a Confederate veteran, saw the Salt River valley as a good place to grow food to sell to the miners in the west of the territory. The Official Story is that he named the area Phoenix because he noticed centuries-old canals that had long been abandoned by the native population, and described the area as a civilization rising from the ashes. One need only point to the year and Swilling’s Confederate service to surmise that he pictured a different civilization rising up from the ashes.* We will return to Swilling and his naming of Phoenix.
At the same time, in the more populated northeast, the first games of American football were being played, with the first official game played between Rutgers and Princeton less than two years later. The game quickly spread to the midwest, where it was enthusiastically taken up by the University of Chicago - whose mascot was, of course, the phoenix.
In 1881, the city of Phoenix was officially incorporated. In the same year, Christopher O’Brien was born in Chicago. O’Brien would go on to join an athletic club in the south side, where he would fall in love with football. Unable to play at a university, O’Brien instead transformed the athletic club into a real football team, and arranged games with other teams in the midwest. He bought old uniforms from the university, uniforms that were so faded that they were no longer maroon, but cardinal. And so the Cardinals got their name.
From these humble beginnings, both Phoenix and football grew far beyond anybody’s expectations. Both took off exponentially after the second world war, helped by the new inventions of air conditioning and television. And in 1987, the Cardinals moved to Phoenix, finally uniting the two.
-- What is an Arizona Cardinal? --
Although the logo on their helmets is a bird, the word “cardinal” originally meant “that on which a thing depends”**. Taking the widely accepted principal that Names Matter, the etymological definition of Arizona Cardinals is “the things on which Arizona depends”. But what could this be? To find out, let’s ask the original inhabitants.
“Arizona” likely comes from a Spanish version of an O’odham word for the region. The O’odham share a creation story with the other southwestern nations - Hopi, Navajo, Apache, Pueblo, etc. This story describes the people traveling through three worlds before reaching this world. Those three worlds were not nice places, and the people who escaped from them left behind creatures who desired only evil. But the people who escaped were aided by powerful beings.
What if this were true? Not all of it, of course, but we must recognize that all creation stories have Truth at their center. What if we accepted that there exist three other, darker worlds, beneath the American southwest? And within those darker worlds, beings that long to escape? If we do, then the story of the Arizona Cardinals begins to come into focus. The Cardinals are the thing on which Arizona hinges. Football only came into existence after the founding of Phoenix. The civilization that Swilling was drawn to, that he envisioned rising from the ashes, was neither an older Native society nor the Confederacy, but was the First World. It is likely that he didn’t know what he was doing, but that he was drawn in by these evil forces.
The only conclusion we can draw is that both football in general and the Cardinals in particular were created by these beings of the First World in order to harness energy from the people who become attached to the game.
-- But what about 1947? --
We’ve already established that there were powerful forces working to prevent the Cardinals from winning that championship. But win they did. So if our theory is correct - that the Cardinals were created so that beings from the First World could escape - we would see unexplainable things emerge from the southwest. Did anything unexplainable escape from the southwest in 1947? Yes. Something did.
It is remarkable that, after all the UFO encounters in 1947 and 1948, so many so-called ufologists became convinced, and spread the word, that these ships came from other planets. We must reject this theory. It is clear that these UFOs were an attempted breakout from the creatures of the darker first three worlds, escaping from beneath the American southwest thanks to the victory of the Cardinals in the 1947 NFL championship. Luckily, due to the relative unpopularity of both the NFL and of Phoenix at the time, they lacked the power to truly escape, and the benevolent beings of this world managed to take down the ships that did escape.
-- Conclusion --
With the enormous popularity of the NFL and the enormous population of Phoenix, if the Cardinals were to win again, the energy harvested by the First World would be too great, our guardian angels would be unable to prevent the creatures of the darker worlds from overwhelming us. They are hard at work trying to keep the Cardinals back, but these dark powers are still empowering the Cardinals to try and win.
*Atlanta, recovering from its burning at the hands of the Union armies, would also incorporate the phoenix into its imagery and its story. That one is more obvious.
**This became a bird through a long and winding road. Originally a noun meaning "that on which a thing depends", this became applied especially to door hinges. “Cardinal” then became an adjective meaning “primary” or “principal” - think cardinal numbers or cardinal directions. As the church grew up in the first few centuries AD, certain churches in a given city took on importance, and the priests in those churches became known as “cardinal priests”, aka the most important priest in a given place. The ‘priest’ part eventually got dropped, and these principal priests were simply called cardinals. As the church became more and more centralized, cardinal became an official position with an official dress. And through that dress, the shade of red that the cardinals dressed in became known as its own color, and many of the "Cardinal" teams in the US were originally named for this color, not for the bird. The Stanford Cardinal still keep the original name, for instance. The birds were of course named for their color.
-- TLDR --
The Arizona Cardinals are not just cursed, they are the means by which a civilization of evil primeval peoples will escape its confines and destroy the universe. Only by preventing them from winning the Super Bowl can we keep them at bay. James Harrison and Santonio Holmes are therefore the most important people in the history of the universe.
Nice episode.There is an ESPN Daily podcast episode on the Pottsville Maroons, and the curse of the Cardinals
ESPN Daily - Most Powerful Curse in the NFL? The 1925 Pottsville Maroons | ESPN
Extra, extra, read all about it! Maroons Championship STOLEN! The Pottsville Maroons were one of the greatest early NFL teams, but the league stripped them of their 1925 championship and gave it to the (then) Chicago Cardinals. Thus, a curse was born. Almost a century later, could the stolen...www.espn.com