Dennis Trumpet
Toot Toot
Early this week it came to the attention of Dennis Crumpet the head president of KADA (Kermits Anti Doping Agency), that a number of Roys FFC players have shown a remarkable increase in their performance in such a short time that it cannot be explained away by natural improvement. Subsequently Crumpet launched an investigation into the possible use of PED's by a number of prominent Roys posters such as fitzroybowiedog , Willo_ and Loonerty .
The results have come back from the lab and they make for grim reading. An autopsy completed on Harambes body has revealed that he did not die from a gunshot wound. Rather he went into cardiac arrest due to blood clots caused by EPO doping (Eroythropoietin).
It is physically impossible to get this swole through natural means.
Not only this, 17 Roys players have tested positive to anabolic steroyds, indicating a massive unscrupulous systematic doping scheme is pervasive throughout the club. As a strong advocate for clean sport I am shocked and appalled by these royvelations. Unfortunately the SFA is not a signatory to the KADA code , but I urge The Filth Wizard to use his own judgement and common sense and immediately suspend the team in question in order to preserve whatever credibility this league has left.
Thank you for your time.
The results have come back from the lab and they make for grim reading. An autopsy completed on Harambes body has revealed that he did not die from a gunshot wound. Rather he went into cardiac arrest due to blood clots caused by EPO doping (Eroythropoietin).
It is physically impossible to get this swole through natural means.
Not only this, 17 Roys players have tested positive to anabolic steroyds, indicating a massive unscrupulous systematic doping scheme is pervasive throughout the club. As a strong advocate for clean sport I am shocked and appalled by these royvelations. Unfortunately the SFA is not a signatory to the KADA code , but I urge The Filth Wizard to use his own judgement and common sense and immediately suspend the team in question in order to preserve whatever credibility this league has left.
Thank you for your time.
