Dad jokes - add yours

[Rod Stroker]

View attachment 1275574

Bishops can't move forward. Only diagonal.

 

[Samsquanch]

An oldi

An oldie, but a true goldie!!! Never tire of hearing it, especially from a great raconteur.

Clearly, Skull had never heard it before based on how he was pissing himself laughing as he delivered the punchline.

 

[Samsquanch]

If you had a pen that wrote with invisible ink and it ran out... How would you know?

 

[kool kangas]

 

[Bertie22]

Two hats are on a peg.
One says to the other, "You stay here', I'll go on ahead."
Boom Boom

 

[Samsquanch]

 

[Samsquanch]

 

[Bertie22]

Q: Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?

A: Because it has a silent pee.

 

[big_e]

Breaking News: Santa is in hospital!

He's having a tinselectomy.

 

[Bertie22]

Breaking News: Santa is in hospital!

He's having a tinselectomy.

Are you sure it's not tinselitis?

 

[Samsquanch]

When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised, the Lord doesn't work that way. So I just stole one and asked Him to forgive me.

 

[gokangas]

Joseph: What do you mean you have no rooms available in your inn?
Innkeeper: What do you expect, it's Christmas mate.

 

[Harvey Manfrenjensenden]

 

[ferball]

Jesus: What do you mean you have no rooms available in your inn?
Innkeeper: What do you expect, it's Christmas mate.

I don't want to know how it was Jesus talking to the inkeeper.

 

[ferball]

That's a relief.

 

[gokangas]

I don't want to know how it was Jesus talking to the inkeeper.

Fair call refer to edit. My bad.

 

[gokangas]

My neighbours were listening to some pretty cool music until the arseholes asked me to turn it down.

 

[ferball]

 

[Samsquanch]

 

[Samsquanch]

 

[Luke72]

View attachment 1288497

Jisse W Smuth likes this

 

[Jisse W Smuth]

Jisse W Smuth likes this

NTTAWT eh!

 

[Samsquanch]

 

[gokangas]

It’s pretty busy at the gym this arvo. I’m 6th in line for a selfie.

 

[gokangas]

I joined a Ukranian dating site and now I've got a chick in Kiev.