Society & Culture Disgraceful behaviour of parents at kids sporting games

[Stratton_Gun]

I have a similar one. Back in primary school, I played BBall for the school on Saturday's against teams of other schools. It was the finals and my team had just won a match to get us into the GF. It was a pretty touch match and be being a little overweight back then meant I was very puffed by the end of it and this very red in the face. Straight after my game the older team from my school was also playing the finals. Just because they were older didn't mean they were better. Absolute basket case of a team who struggled to get a team together each week. My team weren't anything special but these guys weren't any better despite being bigger. Anyway on the Friday night before the match, I got a call from the older teams coach and apparently they were short on players and needed another person. My mum said OK as I was going to be there anyway and of course she knew I would have been keen to play as well. They chose me because I was one of the better ones in the team. I wasn't great but I was tall so these guys were more my size despite being more physically mature as they would have been 11/12 and I was 10 and a half I think.

Anyway I make my way over to the team after my game and all is good. I knew a couple of them without being friends or anything with them and despite being screwed from the previous games I was having one of those days where everything was just going in. At half time the opposition parents caused a bit of a stir saying how I wasn't meant to be playing and all that and after holding up the game for a while the ref found out that they were right so I left at half time. They didn't seem to have a problem with it at the start of the game, just when I was playing well. I wasn't too worried about it all I don't think but I remember my mum wasn't happy and from memory muttered a few words about the opposition mums on the way out. no idea what happened in the game after i left

 

[manureid]

Coach volleyball...few season ago, state school comp, the rules were for the 9 players I had (6 on court remember), even playing time across all the group games, if you make finals, play the best team to win. We had one group game left, win to make medal match. Told the girls the day before, everyone is playing for spots tomorrow in the first game. We had to ref/score the first game before ours, all but one girl turns up on time...she rolls in telling her mates she had not slept, been out all night drinking (16 years old), lays beside the court, not involved in our duty. Anyway, noted by the coach. Play our last game, she is diabolical, not selected in starting 6 for final. We are playing arch rivals who had beaten us comfortably in a group game, so will be tough. Her old man turns up, first game he has been to all week (and it should be noted, him and I got along fine before this as new him from previous coaching stints). Anyway, first set we play out of our skins and win, best we had played all week. Tell the girls on bench, I cannot change this lineup for the next set, but stay ready, i could call on you at any time. Second set, we are still playing out of our skins. I am worried about making changes, as this lot can be mentally fragile, and if we let the other team get on a run, we could lose this still. So I leave it, we win, celebrations all round from all but said girl on bench...Next thing, her Dad crosses the middle of the court as the girls celebrate, finger in my face ranting and raving about 'you didnt follow the rules, equal court time, left her on the bench (expletives), cant you read, is in the coaches handbook, will be taking this straight to the school' blah blah..And then stormed off, girls were a bit shocked, one parent came over and said that was uncalled for...Didnt bother me, sadly he didnt hang around long enough so i could tell him his daughter turned up drunk/hung over and played like shite.

Anyway, he marched in to the school the next day ranting and raving to the coordinator...sadly for him i had already warned them he would, told them the situation, so they told him bad luck, coaches decision in finals, you should have read the handbook! Oh, and his trumped up little biatch of a daughter left the program after that! Winrar!1!1!

TL ; DR

 

[The_Reaper]

In my cricket team the opposition never had problems with younge players filling in.

 

[JimDocker]

Things have changed.

When I was in u15s or 16 soccer, were playing a team that we were heaps better than. One of their players head butted our captain and was yellow carded just before half time. I was livid that he had not been sent off. During the break, I said to the coach something about taking revenge as the ref had ****ed up etc. Typical teenage boy stuff. The coach said, "Leave it alone, we are winning. Stay out of trouble, just play the game" When the game restarted, I lined this kid up and fouled him badly. He screamed in pain and was carried off. I got a yellow card. The coach immediately took me off and bollocked me.

My dad did not say anything until we got back in the car. Then he told me in no uncertain terms that he was embarrassed by my behaviour and that if I expected to continue playing, that I should change my attitude. He made me go and apologise to the coach for my behaviour at the next training session and said that any repeat of that sort of behaviour would result in me not playing anymore.

None of this my boy can do no wrong stuff there.

 

[Slax]

I used to referee junior soccer growing up, and throwing out parents from the ground was a semi-regular occurrence. Not a fun experience when you are only 14/15/16 yourself, but the ground staff were usually pretty supportive. Often the coaches were too.

The best part about being promoted to senior football was not having to deal with parents any more.

I used to coach under 11/13 for a period, eventually quit because of the parents. Tried to impose a rule in the U13s where if the parents were repeat offenders for abusive behaviour then it would impact the game time and side their children were in. Feel apart when we got a new president who wouldn't back it (partially because I banned his brother), which lead to me quitting 2/3 way through the season. Reached a point where I wanted to punch a few parents and realised that I didn't want to set that image regardless of what the parents deserved.

The parents seem to be living out their sporting frustrations of their own failure or missed opportunities through their kids. It actually interesting that over the time I did it, had a couple of kids whose fathers had played in the NSL (one for Aus) and one mother who had represented Aus in another sport, they were great and very supportive, but they also saw how frustrating it was a generally watched the games away from the other parents.

The responsibility for controlling bad parents is not on the governing bodies, but on the clubs. I really believe that if a club does nothing about known bad parents then kick the club out of the competition. Governing bodies should deduct points from clubs where parents make physical threats to opposition players/coaches or match officials. This will help bring the clubs and the parents of the other kids in to stop it, no parent would want to see the season finish with their kid missing out on playing finals only because of their stupid actions.

 

[DarwinRoo]

I don't see how playing someone younger can hurt. Playing a 16yo in an Under 12's game I can understand but the other way around it's not an advantage at all.

 

[Liam Boy]

I don't see how playing someone younger can hurt. Playing a 16yo in an Under 12's game I can understand but the other way around it's not an advantage at all.

Yeah, it's strange. Isn't it called UnderXX because it denotes that players can be any age below the given number?

 

[_Christoh_]

2 weeks before the finals my team were undefeated and playing Walkerville who had only lost one game to us by a kick midway through the season. We played them at their ground and there was the biggest turn out I had ever seen for an U/13 game of footy. The game was a belter and we got up by a point, I kicked 6 that day and had a run in with their CHB who wanted to fight all day. I didnt give him the satisfaction. During the game the parents from his team were encouraging him to belt me when I flew for marks or when I put my head over the pill. He did both.

On one boundary throw in in front of their mob I took the ruck and the ball swiftly went down their end as I walked along the boundary line I was jeered, sworn at and told to go fluck myself. I turned and gave em the finger but said nothing.

Anyway fast forward two weeks and we are playing them in the first week of the finals. During the week leading up to the game I won the association medal and was on a complete high. What I didnt know at the time and only found out once I was an adult (approx 25) was that my Mum got a call during the week from someone saying that if I played in the final I would have my legs broken and be bashed after the game. The person on the other end was an adult too. My Mum never told me , we played them on a large oval which suited us and we ran over them by 6 goals. We went on to play in the GF which they didnt make and we won by 90 points.

We played them the next year and were winning comfortably so I decide to play from behind against the same CHB and gave him a few round the head like he did to me, he got pissed off swung at me and got sent off and the parents lost their shit and abused me all day. For those who dont know Walkerville is full of millionaires probably similar to Toorak in Melbourne.

 

[The_Answer3]

parents at the younger age brackets haven't been banned yet. The older age brackets have sorted out the filth.

Anyone started sledging parents in the crowd while playing juniors?

I found I was involved a bit in basketball due to the close proximity of the 'fans'.

One mother started yelling at me for setting screens 'stop doing that #34'...'you thug' etc etc. Sorry lady, excuse me while I stand stil and your son runs into me. May have told her to cook her son some chicken because he's getting abused until he stops resembling a pre-pubesent girl....

Had a bunch of Italian moms getting strangely vocal during one close game, so I thought I'd dedicate some buckets for you. 'This next ones for you maria', 'If I score on your son this play he doesn't love you' and 'my mums lasagna is better than yours'.....they were the oddest group of vile supporters I'd seen. Looked like pretty quiet 40 year old itialian mums...but the things that came out of their mouths were more vile than what went in (marios wang)/

Strange having parents directly address players. I don't think it's on, I was more than happy to get into it, but I won't be doing it if I'm a parent.

 

[DrVanNostrand]

Simply put, anyone who gets emotionally involved, or gives a rat's arse about the result, in kids' sport is a complete ******* loser bogan. Pure filth. And in my experience, these people are hardly the "minority". I'll never understand what's so hard about watching kids play sport and actually keeping quiet and just watching the game. My younger brother has played rugby league since he was 8, and I've seen absolutely atrocious behaviour week-in, week-out for a decade. Just can't believe people like this are allowed to walk the streets, let alone permitted to be legal guardians.

If you want your kids to play sport in a friendly, non-confrontational, who-cares kind of environment, get them into cricket. 100000x times better than any footy code for behaviour and lack of bogans. And anyone who tries to start is quickly told to STFU by everyone on both sides.

 

[jo172]

2 weeks before the finals my team were undefeated and playing Walkerville who had only lost one game to us by a kick midway through the season. We played them at their ground and there was the biggest turn out I had ever seen for an U/13 game of footy. The game was a belter and we got up by a point, I kicked 6 that day and had a run in with their CHB who wanted to fight all day. I didnt give him the satisfaction. During the game the parents from his team were encouraging him to belt me when I flew for marks or when I put my head over the pill. He did both.

On one boundary throw in in front of their mob I took the ruck and the ball swiftly went down their end as I walked along the boundary line I was jeered, sworn at and told to go fluck myself. I turned and gave em the finger but said nothing.

Anyway fast forward two weeks and we are playing them in the first week of the finals. During the week leading up to the game I won the association medal and was on a complete high. What I didnt know at the time and only found out once I was an adult (approx 25) was that my Mum got a call during the week from someone saying that if I played in the final I would have my legs broken and be bashed after the game. The person on the other end was an adult too. My Mum never told me , we played them on a large oval which suited us and we ran over them by 6 goals. We went on to play in the GF which they didnt make and we won by 90 points.

We played them the next year and were winning comfortably so I decide to play from behind against the same CHB and gave him a few round the head like he did to me, he got pissed off swung at me and got sent off and the parents lost their shit and abused me all day. For those who dont know Walkerville is full of millionaires probably similar to Toorak in Melbourne.

I have to admit, the only time I could truly make sense of your story was by substituting the word 'Walkerville' for one of 'Eastern Park' or 'Salisbury West'.

Who did you play for, doing the maths you'd only be a year or so ahead of me.

 

[Caesar]

If you want your kids to play sport in a friendly, non-confrontational, who-cares kind of environment, get them into cricket. 100000x times better than any footy code for behaviour and lack of bogans. And anyone who tries to start is quickly told to STFU by everyone on both sides.

Cricket is shit if you're no good though. Five minutes at the crease followed by a whole day of standing in the field.

Love the game but not much good as a participation sport for those of us with indifferent talent. I would have quit very early if I hadn't had wicketkeeping to keep me occupied.

 

[I bleed Blue]

parents at the younger age brackets haven't been banned yet. The older age brackets have sorted out the filth.

Anyone started sledging parents in the crowd while playing juniors?

I found I was involved a bit in basketball due to the close proximity of the 'fans'.

One mother started yelling at me for setting screens 'stop doing that #34'...'you thug' etc etc. Sorry lady, excuse me while I stand stil and your son runs into me. May have told her to cook her son some chicken because he's getting abused until he stops resembling a pre-pubesent girl....

Had a bunch of Italian moms getting strangely vocal during one close game, so I thought I'd dedicate some buckets for you. 'This next ones for you maria', 'If I score on your son this play he doesn't love you' and 'my mums lasagna is better than yours'.....they were the oddest group of vile supporters I'd seen. Looked like pretty quiet 40 year old itialian mums...but the things that came out of their mouths were more vile than what went in (marios wang)/
Strange having parents directly address players. I don't think it's on, I was more than happy to get into it, but I won't be doing it if I'm a parent.

Loled at "marios wang"

 

[carn tigez]

I played cricket from the age of 8 all throughout my childhood, never really had a problem. There were a few verbal incidents between parents of both sides, but as far as I can remember I'm pretty sure it was more about the umpiring of the game (back in the younger days when parents umpired) and the like. Definitely never saw me or any of my team mates cop abuse from either our own supporters or the other team's.

The only incident of note I can recall is back in the days of U12's, in the first division so most of us were top age players and reasonably competent at the sport. My old man was our coach and also square leg umpiring at the time, while we were fielding. One of their batsmen got hit in the thigh by our opener - he was quick for U12's, but anyone who's played or watched 11yo's playing cricket a 'quick' bowler still puts flight on the ball. Anyway, the kid who copped it on thigh limped down the pitch instantly afterwards while the ball trickled to where I was at a shortish mid wicket. I threw down the stumps and my old man gave the kid out - the ball was nowhere near dead so it was fair play.

Anyway the opposition coach who was central umpire took objection to this and proceeded to have a quite heated exchange with the old man, saying that it was unfair and not in the spirit of the game. His actual remarks contained a fair few expletives and considering that he was surrounded by a bunch of 11yo kids it was pretty ridiculous. If the kid had been hit in the head or similar, or the ball could have been seen as dead I could understand his anger. But the fact is we were 1 year out of U14's, when all allowances disappear and rules are rules.

One similar case I can now remember is in the year before this still in U12 div 1, we were playing a team who had 2 superstar batsmen. The opposition coach batted both til they made 50 (compulsory retirement), then gave each of the other kids about 2 overs each before retiring them so he could bring back these 2 guns to continue slaughtering our mediocre attack. This side ended up making about 250 off their 40 overs, a ****en ridiculous score for U12 cricket. Anyway, my old man as coach was obviously displeased with this not because we were going to lose, but because this shit excuse for a human was going to put 9 kids off playing cricket for life. It turns out that the official rule is when players had been retired, you had to bring them back in in order from lowest score to highest. My father, being the noble citizen that he is, reported this situation to the association who promptly disqualified the opposition from this game and awarded us the 4 points mid week. When we rocked up the week after to bat, the opposition hadn't turned up. Their coach had obviously told them the game had been cancelled, which it had not.

I just want to point out that, after writing these stories, you could interpret my father to be the one obsessed with getting a result in junior cricket. In fact, he coached me throughout my 8 years of junior cricket and had a pure participation focus. This meant that we didn't play finals once in my first 5 years as our guns wouldn't see much action, but in the last 3 years we had such a deep and balanced team that we played finals each year and should have (but didn't) win a flag. Barely any players left during this time because we all got a go and were allowed to just enjoy our cricket. That's what junior sport should be all about.

 

[_Christoh_]

I have to admit, the only time I could truly make sense of your story was by substituting the word 'Walkerville' for one of 'Eastern Park' or 'Salisbury West'.

Who did you play for, doing the maths you'd only be a year or so ahead of me.

I played for Broadview. I dont know how bad Eastern Park have been in the past but I do know when helping my brother coach their u/11 last year that we would not tolerate any coaching or abuse from the sidelines. Its because of the crap I copped and he witnessed when I played that we would nip it in the bud. Having said that he moved his boy to another club this year so there might be something in what you say. The worst team I saw from last year for poor parents was Golden Grove who were on par with Walkerville. One of their kids decked my nephew behind play and openly congratulated the kid that did it.

 

[Simple Jack]

In my cricket team the opposition never had problems with younge players filling in.

Yeah wtf. In every underage sport I played (which was tbf only footy, cricket and basketball) this was completely accepted and even pretty regular.

 

[radiojake]

2 weeks before the finals my team were undefeated and playing Walkerville who had only lost one game to us by a kick midway through the season. We played them at their ground and there was the biggest turn out I had ever seen for an U/13 game of footy. The game was a belter and we got up by a point, I kicked 6 that day and had a run in with their CHB who wanted to fight all day. I didnt give him the satisfaction. During the game the parents from his team were encouraging him to belt me when I flew for marks or when I put my head over the pill. He did both.

On one boundary throw in in front of their mob I took the ruck and the ball swiftly went down their end as I walked along the boundary line I was jeered, sworn at and told to go fluck myself. I turned and gave em the finger but said nothing.

Anyway fast forward two weeks and we are playing them in the first week of the finals. During the week leading up to the game I won the association medal and was on a complete high. What I didnt know at the time and only found out once I was an adult (approx 25) was that my Mum got a call during the week from someone saying that if I played in the final I would have my legs broken and be bashed after the game. The person on the other end was an adult too. My Mum never told me , we played them on a large oval which suited us and we ran over them by 6 goals. We went on to play in the GF which they didnt make and we won by 90 points.

We played them the next year and were winning comfortably so I decide to play from behind against the same CHB and gave him a few round the head like he did to me, he got pissed off swung at me and got sent off and the parents lost their shit and abused me all day. For those who dont know Walkerville is full of millionaires probably similar to Toorak in Melbourne.

I have to admit, the only time I could truly make sense of your story was by substituting the word 'Walkerville' for one of 'Eastern Park' or 'Salisbury West'.

Many, many moons ago I played for Salisbury u/15s. We finished top of the ladder after only losing one game to Elizabeth (last game of the minor round) - Played them again the following week in the first final and beat them to go straight to the grand final. Two weeks later we face Elizabeth again in the decider.

Elizabeth had this giant brute of a centre half forward. Was so much bigger than any other player (and to add to it, the previous season he had been in my younger brother's league, so I assume that meant he was atleast 12 months younger than all of us) - Anyway, he was a thug who would routinely belt opposition players across the chops on his way to a 7+ goal haul.

Grand final day we spanked them, we were over 10 goals infront halfway through the last quarter, and their brute had been held goaless. At one point the ball was kicked towards the brute near the boundry line and our centre half back spoiled it over the line. The brute turned around in utter frustration and threw our centre half back into the boundry fence (which ended up breaking his shoulder or collarbone) and preceeded to throw some punches in for good measure. It was right near the benches so ofcourse everyone is up off the bench and it was on for young and old and parents had come in and got involved too. Luckily, I was actually on the field at this stage (this was rare, I was a shit player) and I managed to avoid getting involved in the fracas.

The fight got broken up and the umpire tried to get the game restarted but everytime anyone got tackled they would come up swinging. Sadly, the umpire ended up calling the game off early and awarded us the win. Then we had to wait around for a half an hour or more as officials checked rule books regarding all in brawls ending grand finals and what to do about it. It certainly was a downer on the premiership.

The brute was banned from playing footy for a couple of seasons and I think he may have even got an assualt charge put on him.

That week on 5AA, Elizabeth mums were ringing up saying it was Salisbury's fault and Salisbury mums were responding saying vice versa. It was kind of funny listening to all the different interpretations of what had happened and what lead to the game being called off.

This is a bit longwinded, and not exactly related to the OP, rather more the parents ringing 5AA blaming the each other over the brawl that ended an u/15s grand final

 

[J_Moore]

Cricket is shit if you're no good though. Five minutes at the crease followed by a whole day of standing in the field.

Love the game but not much good as a participation sport for those of us with indifferent talent. I would have quit very early if I hadn't had wicketkeeping to keep me occupied.

Yeah, probably pretty boring for a kid if you're no good.

As an adult, though, it's absolutely one of the best sports to play if you're shithouse. You just load the side up with a 3-4 people that know what they're doing, and you've got yourself a weekend social club.

As a worse than mediocre park cricketer good for about 3 balls at the crease, and 3-4 overs bowling before it all went to shit, In field banter was a Saturday morning highlight.

And on batting day, being up on the hill and under the gumtree, with the paper and 8 other guys talking smack, times were good.

 

[Stratton_Gun]

Anyway fast forward two weeks and we are playing them in the first week of the finals. During the week leading up to the game I won the association medal and was on a complete high. What I didnt know at the time and only found out once I was an adult (approx 25) was that my Mum got a call during the week from someone saying that if I played in the final I would have my legs broken and be bashed after the game. The person on the other end was an adult too.

 

[Stratton_Gun]

For any Vics, you may have heard about this game between Bundoora and Ivanhoe I think it was in Colts in around 06/07.
For anyone who has played Bundoora, who would know they are a rough team who are always looking to start fights. They were the 2nd biggest dog club I remember playing which St Damians being first (also from the Bundoora area). I am not sure how it started but apparently one of the Bundoora players and coaches son got sent off for something in the first half and in the second half they brought him back on in another jumper pretending it was someone else. Anyway once he came back on he just started king hitting everyone in sight. Then somehow (i'm a bit hazy on the details) but it ended up with the Bundoora players and some parents as well chasing the Ivanhoe players into the clubrooms. It must have been that bad
edit: heres the link
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/victoria/coach-banned-for-life/story-e6frf7kx-1111112208909

also heard about one from a mate between sfx whitehorse colts and another team where two of the kids got into it on-field and then one of the kids dads came on to join in the fight and before you know it the other kids dad is out there as well and the two dads are fighting

 

[DrVanNostrand]

Yeah, probably pretty boring for a kid if you're no good.

As an adult, though, it's absolutely one of the best sports to play if you're shithouse. You just load the side up with a 3-4 people that know what they're doing, and you've got yourself a weekend social club.

As a worse than mediocre park cricketer good for about 3 balls at the crease, and 3-4 overs bowling before it all went to shit, In field banter was a Saturday morning highlight.

And on batting day, being up on the hill and under the gumtree, with the paper and 8 other guys talking smack, times were good.

So much truth here. No gathering of men quite matches the Saturday afternoon discussions had within park cricket teams while two poor souls are batting and missing out on the gold. Most fascinating of all, alcohol is rarely a factor. Waiting around to bat simply brings out the comedian in most people.

 

[The_Reaper]

My junior cricket team was like that.

We had two batsmen in the crease who were set. One of the blokes could drive so went down to KFC to bring back to the ground.

So the two poor bastards were batting whilst the rest of the team sat around eating fried chicken.

 

[Herne Hill Hammer]

Yesterday at the inter-primary school swimming here in town a father of one of the local kids didn't like that his son wasn't in a race. He proceeded to finger point and verbally abuse and intimidate a 12 year old girl who was the team Captain, telling her to put his son in. When she explained that she couldn't, the boy's mother scrubbed another kid's name out and put her son's in.

The poor girl was reduced to a sobbing, heaving mess. I work with this bloke and we both work with the girl's father.

He'll be lucky if he still has a job next week.

 

[radiojake]

Yesterday at the inter-primary school swimming here in town a father of one of the local kids didn't like that his son wasn't in a race. He proceeded to finger point and verbally abuse and intimidate a 12 year old girl who was the team Captain, telling her to put his son in. When she explained that she couldn't, the mother scrubbed another kid's name out and put her son's in.

The poor girl was reduced to a sobbing, heaving mess. I work with this bloke and we both work with the girl's father.

He'll be lucky if he still has a job next week.

? You mean the mother scrubbed out another kid's name and put the abusive father's son in?

Either way, poor form

 

[The_Reaper]

? You mean the mother scrubbed out another kid's name and put the abusive father's son in?

Either way, poor form

If I understand correctly she was the abusive father's wife