LOL It's not a personal battle, I'm just asking why you would go straight to a joke about suicide in order to discuss a football game. Your purported personal battles don't explain it.
But you're looking at a picture of a cardboard box and saying "look, I have cardboard box." Well, no you don't. You're just looking at it, you don't have the box. You could have the box, if you wanted to. But you don't have it.