- Jun 9, 2008
- 12,313
- 12,314
- AFL Club
- Carlton
Now I am not normally one who believes in curses, witchery, clairvoyants or any other unexplainable phenomena I believe I have uncovered something which completely explains the debacle that is Hawthorn's 2009 season. The club is cursed. Yes, you heard it here first, CURSED. I am of the firm belief that an evil witch cast a spell on the Hawthorn club quite some time ago. This particular curse relates to the number nine and any Hawthorn interactions with this number result in instant failure. I have found several instances of the curse of the number nine impacting Hawthorn's 2009 season and subsequent premiership defense. I have included this damning evidence below for your consumption:
- Hawthorn in season 2009 finished 9th with a total of nine wins.
- In round 19, in the AFL 2009 season, Hawthorn lost to St Kilda, who won their 19th game in a row by defeating the Hawks 10.14 (74) to 7.7 (49).
- In Round 22, on the 29th of August 2009, when Hawthorn needed to win in order to book a finals berth, Essendon scored 16.20 (116) while the Hawks kicked 14.15 (99). Essendon went on to have nine more scoring shots in the 2nd half and win the game by thirtynine points. Almost every single player had the curse of the number nine impact them in some way. Osbourne had nine handballs, Hodge had nineteen possessions, Rioli and Lewis both had nine uncontested marks, Gilham, Dowler and Schoenmakers had nine possessions each. Campbell Brown also expelled nine tonnes of hot air.
So as you can see, the club's 2009 season was CLEARLY cursed. At this stage I was in shock, I used to think that witchcraft was simply something for movies, nerds and Buffy but it was now clear that this was 100% real. I immediately browsed the internet and found some more damning statistics which helped me to trace this curse back MANY years. While I won't post all of them here right now, if after all this evidence you still dont believe me have a guess where Hawthorn finished in 1999??
As you are no doubt all completely convinced by my compelling evidence, it is time for me to call on all of you to help fight for this willing cause. Flogs, scum and filth alike must put all differences aside in this thread and form an alliance to fight a far higher power. Together we must track the history of the curse of the number 9 back to its roots in order to rid the Hawthorn Football Club of its demons. We must trek back through history to find all instances of where this curse has prevailed and post them here in this thread. Only then can we begin to fight this curse and return power to this once mighty club. Soldiers, it is time to stand up and fight!
- Hawthorn in season 2009 finished 9th with a total of nine wins.
- In round 19, in the AFL 2009 season, Hawthorn lost to St Kilda, who won their 19th game in a row by defeating the Hawks 10.14 (74) to 7.7 (49).
- In Round 22, on the 29th of August 2009, when Hawthorn needed to win in order to book a finals berth, Essendon scored 16.20 (116) while the Hawks kicked 14.15 (99). Essendon went on to have nine more scoring shots in the 2nd half and win the game by thirtynine points. Almost every single player had the curse of the number nine impact them in some way. Osbourne had nine handballs, Hodge had nineteen possessions, Rioli and Lewis both had nine uncontested marks, Gilham, Dowler and Schoenmakers had nine possessions each. Campbell Brown also expelled nine tonnes of hot air.
So as you can see, the club's 2009 season was CLEARLY cursed. At this stage I was in shock, I used to think that witchcraft was simply something for movies, nerds and Buffy but it was now clear that this was 100% real. I immediately browsed the internet and found some more damning statistics which helped me to trace this curse back MANY years. While I won't post all of them here right now, if after all this evidence you still dont believe me have a guess where Hawthorn finished in 1999??
As you are no doubt all completely convinced by my compelling evidence, it is time for me to call on all of you to help fight for this willing cause. Flogs, scum and filth alike must put all differences aside in this thread and form an alliance to fight a far higher power. Together we must track the history of the curse of the number 9 back to its roots in order to rid the Hawthorn Football Club of its demons. We must trek back through history to find all instances of where this curse has prevailed and post them here in this thread. Only then can we begin to fight this curse and return power to this once mighty club. Soldiers, it is time to stand up and fight!
