Opinion Joe Daniher missing a final to attend the birth of his child

[Black Panther]

When he had sex in December, he would have known the risks.

That's if you think that Joe can count to 9

 

[tenderwarrior]

I can really see both sides of the argument here. A person in the Navy does not get the option to go home mid deployment because their wife is having a baby, that person knowing what they signed up for but at the same time football is not the military, it is a sport, and seeing your child being born and being threre for your wife are important too.

So what are both sides? Daniher is not in the military, or any other profession of real importance..

 

[tenderwarrior]

His partner couldn't have gone into labour last week???

Having had 2 kids now in my fifties, totally understand wanting to be there. There are some memories you'll take to the grave. A semi is not one of them. Good luck to him and his partner.

If he only had a semi 9 months ago he might of been okay.

 

[deanc]

So what are both sides? Daniher is not in the military, or any other profession of real importance..

And even if in military service, unless you are involved in the planning of or actual conflict at the time, they have 'special leave' entitlements that do permit most to attend the birth of their children.
My mate was in the Air Force for over 30 years and was deployed in many hot spots around the globe, middle east etc. and during this time he still got to witness the birth of his 3 kids...

 

[vikingpimp]

A lot of people saying "he shouldn't have had sex in December". How do we know their personal situation? They might've been trying for months, even years to conceive. My wife and I have been lucky, but I have friends that have/are in this exact situation. You're not going to risk that one chance to get pregnant on the off-chance your place of employ has an "extra-special" day on the day of birth.

Also, the baby was reportedly premature - it was said to be due in October. So perhaps Joe was thinking about the timing after all.

 

[iameviljez]

Epidural

Is not a cure all

Edit: Also, both inducing labor and epidurals do increase the chances of requiring a caesar.

 

[Woz]

Not saying personally I’d do it. I just think it’s ridiculous someone would say they’d have divorce papers waiting for them when they’re out there doing their job for the family

You know what his job is for his family? To be there for them when they absolutely need him the most.

Which is what he did.

 

[Doss]

Some genuinely incredible ‘footy is the centre of the universe’ takes here.

 

[iameviljez]

Well they can, but just make sure they use protection !

Later on, Lethal and Bradshaw had a massive falling out which resulted in him joining the Swans, I have often wondered if some of that conflict stemmed from Bradshaw missing that final to attend the birth of his child.

Bradshaw only left after Vossy shopped him around to get Fevola IIRC

 

[Rabish Binney]

Family comes first IMHO.

Always.

 

[golazo]

You know what his job is for his family? To be there for them when they absolutely need him the most.

Which is what he did.

I think you quoted the wrong post

Either that or you have the reading comprehension of a corgie

 

[janty]

We seem to make prelims when Daniher isn't around.

 

[iameviljez]

I think you quoted the wrong post

Either that or you have the reading comprehension of a corgie

No, I am pretty sure he/she quoted correctly.

 

[Giant Pete]

Bradshaw all over again!

Reminds me of Leigh Matthews who was then coach of the Lions telling the players not to have sex in December!

Vaginal.

 

[killtaker1993]

I was on the dole when my wife gave birth to our first Bub, so I had no excuse to miss it

 

[chunkylover53]

You'd think it's not that difficult to keep September clear of these sorts of things...

Why? What goes on in September?

 

[Rotayjay]

If its their first child then fair enough but after that I think the job that will support the children should be given some consideration.

As a Father of 4 I have an interesting perspective on it. I was present for the birth of my first 3 and on each occasion felt an overwhelming amount of guilt having to watch my Wife go through labour. Before our 4th was due I asked my Wife if I could be absent and see what it would be like to see it from the perspective of those Fathers who cant be there for whatever reason.
As it turned out the day of the birth my eldest Daughter was to play her first game of pennant lawn bowls and she wanted me there so I spoke to the Wife about it and she said no problems.
We began the 21 end game and by half time the phone at the club rung with the news of our new arrival. My daughter and I embraced mid green and just cried with joy followed by cheers and well wishes from all in attendance.
I never paid for a drink that day although I restrained myself as I was keen to get to the hospital afterwards.
The feeling of arriving to see my newborn baby was stark contrast to the first three and I found not seeing my Wife go through the pain of labour actually allowed me to focus and bond better with my baby.

Would I do it again, yes.

Excellent post - puts a different perspective on it.

Meh who cares. Grand Final you’d have a genuine dilemma but other than that, no big deal.

Also, might be well wide of the mark here but is it just me or do footballers have children inordinately early? Most people I know seem to have kids in their mid to late 30s. Yet you seem to see plenty of footballers getting around with 2 or 3 kids in their late 20s, early 30s.

Possibly they get so much easy booty as soon as they’re drafted that they get it all out of their system and are ready to settle down early. And nesting chicks would love a well-paid footballer.

Or maybe I just hang around immature people.

AFL footballers are some of the only men of that age who can bring in that kind of money to support a baby.

Personally, I would miss a final for the birth of a child. For a grand final though? I would play. That tips the balance. You get a lifetime with your child but you are very, very lucky to get selected for an AFL grand final. Winning a premiership is the chance of a lifetime.

 

[iameviljez]

Why? What goes on in September?

It’s Richmond and Geelong’s little secret

 

[Ricketz]

Anyone who would sacrifice being at the birth of their own child for a game of footy has their priorities wrong. If you are not at the minimum that invested in your own child you shouldn't be having them.

Imagine leaving your wife to go through it on her own, or if there were complications, leaving her to deal with it on her own.

The culture of absentee fathers starts at birth.

 

[Blackhawk42]

As a father of 2 I can confirm that you absolutely miss the game to be there for the birth.

I will suggest one thing though.

My wife had 2 elective C-sections. You essentially choose your child's birthday which is sort of fun.
Could the AFL impose a ruling that all players having children MUST have a doctor convince the pregnant partner that natural birth isn't possible?

I don't believe they perform them on weekends so this issue shouldn't happen ever again.




*Not entirely serious.

 

[Ricketz]

My comment was tongue in cheek but FWIW an induction is not a serious medical procedure and they are often scheduled well in advance.

A procedure hat can lead to serious bleeding, a c-section, uterine tears or low foetal heart rate sounds pretty serious to me.

Boutique Instagram parenting.

 

[Ricketz]

Birth is not a serious medical procedure. It’s the most natural thing in the world. The female body was designed to carry and nourish a baby and then to give birth. That’s it’s whole point.

Doctors with their interventions turn it into a medical procedure. But most labouring women will deliver naturally, needing no medical interventions at all.

I was wondering where you got this “serious medical procedure” idea from and then you mentioned your partner was a doctor. Bingo!

On a side note: a Caesarean is major abdominal surgery. Never done through keyhole surgery (obviously), often done when the mother-to-be is exhausted from labouring and/or in the midst of a medical emergency, and then the woman is given a brand new baby to look after while she recovers.

So if you hear anyone recommending a caesarean is the way to go, remember natural birth is best every time, and a caesarean should be a last resort.

As for being at the birth of your child vs a footy match: when you die and the wording on your head stone is being decided, do you want it to say, excellent worker, paid very well, kept his family in luxury OR loving father, husband, brother, son, friend, will be dearly missed etc?

It’s human relationships that are important. Not your job, or money, or travel, or lifestyle.

Family and friends. If you don’t have them, you’ve got nothing.

Human birth is one of the highest risk and most difficult out of all the placental mammals. Our hips evolved to support upright walking narrowing the available room to deliver, our shoulders and rib cage evolved to throw things and use tools, and our heads evolved to carry a very large brain.

Sure it's natural - but it isn't safe.

 

[mr bagcroft]

Simp.

 

[NewMelbournian]

My very non PC opinion is this is ridiculous. You're a man. You're doing nothing useful. The baby will be no different if you get there 2 hours after it is born. I am assuming his wife is not a social outcast? She has close family and friends? She wouldn't be alone for it. This idea that the father has to be there even if it means he misses out on a huge professional achievement is just so irrational.

I support equality in general when it makes sense. But society expecting the man to go there, sit there, do nothing uniquely useful, and miss out on a final, it's just laughable.

 

[iameviljez]

My very non PC opinion is this is ridiculous. You're a man. You're doing nothing useful. The baby will be no different if you get there 2 hours after it is born. I am assuming his wife is not a social outcast? She has close family and friends? She wouldn't be alone for it. This idea that the father has to be there even if it means he misses out on a huge professional achievement is just so irrational.

I support equality in general when it makes sense. But society expecting the man to go there, sit there, do nothing uniquely useful, and miss out on a final, it's just laughable.

Just because your support is emotional rather than practical, doesn’t make it imaginary.