Discussion manangatang's Diary

[GotTheGoodes]

yeah well I realised that just a trifle too late

I LOVE TRIFLE!!

 

[manangatang]

​

Dear Diary,

What a crazy, dystopic time we’re living in.

As I write this, I’m in self-confinement in the cheese room at the Snow Dome.

Unlike listeria, I read somewhere that cheese can’t catch or spread COVID-19 so I’ve decided to transfer all of my social interactions to the cheeses in here. It’s pretty good – I’ve got a whole collection of them and we sit down and talk for hours and hours.

Dr. Schnitzerhund is still in self-confinement as well. He sent me a text the other day saying that he was “shitting like a freight train” (whatever that means).

It doesn’t sound very good for him, and it means I’m having to navigate this rocky path to mental health on my own.

Hey Diary – you know how last week I said I cooked Tarks’ pet hamster and he didn’t like it? Well I felt a little bit bad and Dr. Schnitzerhund decided we should do some kind of respectful burial to help Tarks get closure.

Here’s a picture I drew of what was really quite a touching ceremony:



What I’m thankful for:

I got to witness something rare and inspiring this week! It gave me energy and a little spark of joy.

Watching two consenting, naked men embrace – a scene that must once have been considered forbidden – was glorious, although apparently someone got into a bit of trouble for it. It reminded me that love is love, whether it’s a hairy and slightly overweight man or a wheel of cheese.

I’m also thankful for winning another game of Qooty on the weekend, this time against the Gumbies. It was a really enjoyable week, although I was slightly taken aback at how sexual innuendo can be inspired by even the most banal of things. I hadn’t thought of lemon juice running onto or into genitals before and I’m not entirely sure I want to think of it again.

What made me sad:

Werewolf has again shown itself to be a negative force. I saw some people on there fighting and getting angry at each other and I just think that I’m better off taking myself away from that for a while. It just leads to hurt feelings and threats of physical violence and wishing poor health outcomes on one another.

The problem is that every time I push myself out it just keeps dragging me back in.

I had to bear witness to a really rude word this week. It starts with a ‘C’ and has three other letters – I don’t want to permanently scar you by writing it in full. Anyway, I saw that someone thought that Wayne was one of these C words and thought it strongly enough to post it 9 different places.

It took quite some time to delete them all and it made me very tired and a little bit unhappy.

Simone tells me that people who use words like that do it as a compromise between running away and fighting. Or at least that's what I imagine she says (wheels of cheese can't actually talk).

Learning of the week:

So Diary, there was a lot of froth and bubble this week as one of the really popular people around here (his name was Josh) seemed to short circuit and acted out the equivalent of shitting on his account, burning it, blending it, shooting it and then burying it.

It stirred up complex and mixed feelings in me. Confusion. Disappointment. Sadness. Anger. Eroticism. More confusion. Awkwardness.

But I think the thing I learned from all of this is that some people would rather set fire to the world than play their 150th game for a team they don’t really like.

Even if they voluntarily joined said team.

And even if they had the option of asking to be delisted.

Learning can sometimes come from the most unlikely of circumstances.

Until next week!

- Tang

 

[Grand Uncle Horace]

gold.

 

[Yakker]

Bless your heart big man

 

[Dinsdale]

Phone converts it to readable font. Thank you phone.

Sent by shoephone via Tapatoe

 

[manangatang]

​

Dear diary,

Isolation is treating me surprisingly kindly - I feel like I’m perfectly adapted to a life of total solitude. But who am I kidding? I’ve got my cheeses to talk to!

Without any pesky humans to interrupt me, I’ve converted the Cheese Room at the Snow Dome into a bustling community with shared values and common goals. We laugh, we talk, we support each other.

We even wrote a song, which I’ve been practicing on a sitar I made exclusively of human hair and matchsticks.

It didn’t even matter that I later realised that someone else had actually thought of the song before me, I think it’s a ripper.



Other than taking in a delivery of delicious sausages, I haven’t heard much from Dr. Schnitzerhund recently. He’s offered to run a consultation via Zoom, so I’ll see how that goes and will report back next week!

I’m looking forward to showing him all of my craft projects and my new cheese friend (it’s a Gorgonzola named Sha’tiqua - she’s a real firecracker). I’m sure he’ll be well pleased.

What I’m thankful for:

I'm so pleased that I am around to bear witness to some incredible recent media efforts from our friends at the Bombers. The shooping skills exhibited in cadsky's thread would bring a tear to the eye of even the most hard-hearted digital creative, while the content in WaynesWorld19's latest offering is undeniable.

I'm happy to report that isolation has become a time of opportunity for me - I've started watching TV shows I'd forgotten about. I think this clip from The Mighty Boosh is fitting right now, and it certainly brought a smile to my world-wearied face...



My team had a fantastic week - not only did we win and stake our claim on the top spot on the ladder, but we also managed to sign a fantastic poster to our squad - Wise Guy Sam. We're having to quarantine him for 14 days, but I've given him access to my Foxtel GO password and 18 litres of milk, so he'll be fine.

Diary; I'm also excited at the prospect of a new Qooty competition that's starting. It's an AFL-themed competition and there's a chance that I could be allowed to coach the mighty Gold Coast Suns! Now, in the real world this is a shithouse team full of Corey Ellises. But the SIM is the great equaliser - can you imagine if I won a flag with the Suns? Scenes.

What made me sad:

I was a bit sad that a team had to miss out on a week of good, old-fashioned banter last week. The Bombers may not be everyone's cup of artificially-sweetened, poor quality instant coffee, but damnit if they don't have the same rights as all of us. The right to be told they're shit. The right to tell other people they're shit. It's all part of the great circle of Sweet F.A. life, and I was sad that they were kept out of the loop.

It also saddened me to think that some people would rather risk damaging their team's premiership hopes via penalties or player suspensions than banter against certain teams. Now is a time for us to talk more rather than talk less.

The other thing that made me sad this week is the time I wasted in the committee room on attempting to hose down spurious arguments. The committee room is quickly becoming as negative as a game of Werewolf, although to be fair nobody has threatened bodily harm in the committee room (yet).

Learning of the week:

I’ve learned that we all do isolation differently.

Some of us binge on Netflix and Uber Eats. Some of us buy and hoard toilet paper. Some of us cross-stitch pictures of famous mass murderers while setting fire to all of our furniture.

And some of us come together and create armed groups of angry locals!

I was glad to hear that in these uncertain and troubling times, some communities have rallied together to forge an unbreakable bond. Does this come with potentially concerning quasi-militant activity and alleged xenophobia? Sure.

But it’s worth it.

On a completely unrelated note, I hear the Upper Murray region is particularly nice at this time of year.

Until next week!

- Tang

 

[TedDougChris]

View attachment 845841​

Dear diary,

Isolation is treating me surprisingly kindly - I feel like I’m perfectly adapted to a life of total solitude. But who am I kidding? I’ve got my cheeses to talk to!

Without any pesky humans to interrupt me, I’ve converted the Cheese Room at the Snow Dome into a bustling community with shared values and common goals. We laugh, we talk, we support each other.

We even wrote a song, which I’ve been practicing on a sitar I made exclusively of human hair and matchsticks.

It didn’t even matter that I later realised that someone else had actually thought of the song before me, I think it’s a ripper.



Other than taking in a delivery of delicious sausages, I haven’t heard much from Dr. Schnitzerhund recently. He’s offered to run a consultation via Zoom, so I’ll see how that goes and will report back next week!

I’m looking forward to showing him all of my craft projects and my new cheese friend (it’s a Gorgonzola named Sha’tiqua - she’s a real firecracker). I’m sure he’ll be well pleased.

What I’m thankful for:

I'm so pleased that I am around to bear witness to some incredible recent media efforts from our friends at the Bombers. The shooping skills exhibited in cadsky's thread would bring a tear to the eye of even the most hard-hearted digital creative, while the content in WaynesWorld19's latest offering is undeniable.

I'm happy to report that isolation has become a time of opportunity for me - I've started watching TV shows I'd forgotten about. I think this clip from The Mighty Boosh is fitting right now, and it certainly brought a smile to my world-wearied face...

View attachment 845854

My team had a fantastic week - not only did we win and stake our claim on the top spot on the ladder, but we also managed to sign a fantastic poster to our squad - Wise Guy Sam. We're having to quarantine him for 14 days, but I've given him access to my Foxtel GO password and 18 litres of milk, so he'll be fine.

Diary; I'm also excited at the prospect of a new Qooty competition that's starting. It's an AFL-themed competition and there's a chance that I could be allowed to coach the mighty Gold Coast Suns! Now, in the real world this is a shithouse team full of Corey Ellises. But the SIM is the great equaliser - can you imagine if I won a flag with the Suns? Scenes.

What made me sad:

I was a bit sad that a team had to miss out on a week of good, old-fashioned banter last week. The Bombers may not be everyone's cup of artificially-sweetened, poor quality instant coffee, but damnit if they don't have the same rights as all of us. The right to be told they're shit. The right to tell other people they're shit. It's all part of the great circle of Sweet F.A. life, and I was sad that they were kept out of the loop.

It also saddened me to think that some people would rather risk damaging their team's premiership hopes via penalties or player suspensions than banter against certain teams. Now is a time for us to talk more rather than talk less.

The other thing that made me sad this week is the time I wasted in the committee room on attempting to hose down spurious arguments. The committee room is quickly becoming as negative as a game of Werewolf, although to be fair nobody has threatened bodily harm in the committee room (yet).

Learning of the week:

I’ve learned that we all do isolation differently.

Some of us binge on Netflix and Uber Eats. Some of us buy and hoard toilet paper. Some of us cross-stitch pictures of famous mass murderers while setting fire to all of our furniture.

And some of us come together and create armed groups of angry locals!

I was glad to hear that in these uncertain and troubling times, some communities have rallied together to forge an unbreakable bond. Does this come with potentially concerning quasi-militant activity and alleged xenophobia? Sure.

But it’s worth it.

On a completely unrelated note, I hear the Upper Murray region is particularly nice at this time of year.

Until next week!

- Tang

I’d like to advise I have repeatedly suggested execution of WaynesWorld19 in the Committee.

I’m only a vote shy of getting it through too .....

 

[WaynesWorld19]

I’d like to advise I have repeatedly suggested execution of WaynesWorld19 in the Committee.

I’m only a vote shy of getting it through too .....

In this time of crisis ....do you think it's appropriate to pursue an execution, for your entertainment ?

 

[TedDougChris]

In this time of crisis ....do you think it's appropriate to pursue an execution, for your entertainment ?

Come on, please vote for it !!! It’s the right thing to do....

 

[Grand Uncle Horace]

In this time of crisis ....do you think it's appropriate to pursue an execution, for your entertainment ?

it is for the survival of the good posters at the Bombers.

 

[Barrybran]

In this time of crisis ....do you think it's appropriate to pursue an execution, for your entertainment ?

Execution is a pasttime everyone can enjoy. Some more briefly than others.

 

[Grand Uncle Horace]

Execution is a pasttime everyone can enjoy. Some more briefly than others.

I believe there are several Bombers who will not weep for Stalineo.

 

[Barrybran]

I believe there are several Bombers who will not weep for Stalineo.

I'm not singling Wayne out here. Execution can be enjoyed no matter who's in the gallows.

 

[Grand Uncle Horace]

I'm not singling Wayne out here. Execution can be enjoyed no matter who's in the gallows.

Well of course I am singling him out and I am not alone. I am pleased ArdentEagle has gone there. He will soon strenghten the numbers of those who have had enough. Meanwhile if the Committee had the gumption they would launch the independent inquiry of his behaviour that is so needed.

Ruour has it there has been cleaning up of PMs between certain Bombers and ex Bombers after the call went out for the Inquiry to have access to these on a confidential basis.

As for enjoyment of executions, I just cannot deal with that.

 

[WaynesWorld19]

Well of course I am singling him out and I am not alone. I am pleased ArdentEagle has gone there. He will soon strenghten the numbers of those who have had enough. Meanwhile if the Committee had the gumption they would launch the independent inquiry of his behaviour that is so needed.

Ruour has it there has been cleaning up of PMs between certain Bombers and ex Bombers after the call went out for the Inquiry to have access to these on a confidential basis.

As for enjoyment of executions, I just cannot deal with that.

 

[manangatang]

​

Dear Diary,

It’s times like these that I’m glad I’ve got you. For the first time in my isolation, I’ve begun to feel a bit unsettled and sad.

Oh it’s not because of a shortage of friends. No; I must reiterate that I have plenty of those within the cheese room! It’s because of how Dr. Schnitzerhund made me feel after our recent Zoom consultation.

Because he and I hadn't been in touch for a while, I decided it would be a good idea to show him some of my favourite friends and favourite places to go in my time of confinement.



You’ll notice that I haven’t gotten around to crafting up Carol’s face yet - I think she’s pretty nice without one. Sha'tiqua is just straight fire.

For context, Dr. Schnitzerhund had just returned from a German sausage festival (there were only 10 people invited) and was in a really great mood. However, I noticed that he became more concerned and almost shocked as our chat went on and as more people were added to our chat.

I think it was after I'd just started talking in my ‘Simone’ voice (it's a thick Belarusian-Slavic drawl that I've been working on for a while now) that he interrupted me and spoke some words that chilled me to the bone. “You’re pretty ****ed up and you should probably find some humans to interact with before you are unrecoverable”.

Well that really took the cheese from my sandwich (so to speak), and has left me wondering how to start the process of reconnecting with humanity.

Perhaps I could open my doors to individual visitors, taking people on tours of my vast and colourful collection of broken pencil leads?

I guess it’s a ‘watch this space’ at this point.

What I’m thankful for:

I’ve found that, even in our darkest hour, it’s important to look towards the sun. Diary – I just made a really clever segue into something that made me happy this week.

It’s a realisation of a lifetime’s work, hopes and aspirations. Yes; I’ve become the real coach of the virtual Gold Coast SUNS. In the real world, I’ve heard people say mean things about my SUNS, but I think that’s just because they haven’t learned how to love them yet. I think it was Tarks who once told me "we can only learn to love by loving".

Individually, I played a pretty good game of Qooty on the weekend, and that’s always nice. I managed to kick six goals from the forward pocket, which is more than any game last season (where I was at full forward). The SIM is humbling in its long-game irony.

I also saw some really neat media articles from my friends and teammates this week. Headless, Proper Gander and Harvey Manfrenjensenden wrote so beautifully in their respective threads that I almost wept with joy. I really liked the idea from Harvey to do a media thread about his 150 favourite trees – it was so good I could have sworn someone else (maybe Headless) would have thought of it first.

But no, apparently not.

What made me sad:

I saw that one of the people in the Qooty community is actively seeking to ruin things for everyone else. It seems that Kennedy Parker has been using his social isolation time to binge read Chomsky. In his latest media article, he makes clear his intent to use his honed talons to tear at the finely woven fabric of all that the posters of Sweet F.A. hold dear.

He’s already started desecrating face masks on avatars and milestone games for less active veteran players. I can only assume there will be outrage, hurt and widespread sadness. In a time when others are calling for love - KP seems to be saying "**** YOU LOVE - **** YOU RIGHT IN THE EAR".

I'm sure there's some psychological explanation for his want to play with our emotions like this - maybe I’ll talk to Dr. Schnitzerhund about it and see what he reckons.

I was also sad that my team lost to the Bombers on the weekend. It brought me to tears and I openly wept for hours and hours and hours. But then I had a thought that I will no longer have to be in a match thread that contains a Drake video clip, and that cheered me straight up. Hate the Drake.

While everything has been good at the SUNS so far, and I'm making lots of a couple of new friends over at the SUNS board, I was saddened to learn that Anthony Miles is no longer in their/our best 22. Poor old Snipper.

Learning of the week:

Banter is a tricky thing, isn’t it Diary?

In among 276 posts made by an individual, I have learnt that you’re bound to have more misses than hits. But I've found that it's how you respond to and bounce back from those misses that maketh the poster.

Specifically, I learnt that if you falsely and bizarrely accuse someone of racism, there’s really only one way back from that. Surprisingly, that way is NOT to come out the next day and pretend that it was all an elaborate and provocative trolling attempt and to accuse others of sooking.

In related news, I also learned that it takes more to be a Humour Coach than simply calling yourself a Humour Coach. Surely there's a TAFE class or somesuch that would provide some more sound qualifications? Might Google it later.

Finally, I learnt that you should NEVER write 'Gold Coast Suns'. No - you need to capitalise the letters in SUNS at all times, and if you don't do that then you're basically Satan.

Until next week

- Tang

 

[Agent93]

In related news, I also learned that it takes more to be a Humour Coach than simply calling yourself a Humour Coach. Surely there's a TAFE class or somesuch that would provide some more sound qualifications? Might Google it later.

Ahh. Is that bit still going? It was rubbish in round 5, and I doubt it has matured.

 

[Agent93]

Finally, I learnt that you should NEVER write 'Gold Coast Suns'. No - you need to capitalise the letters in SUNS at all times, and if you don't do that then you're basically Satan.

It's an acronym for Some Useless New Squad.

 

[manangatang]

​

Dear Diary,

This week I’ve discovered that starting to try to connect to humans in a time of social isolation is an ironically challenging task.

I initially sought connection in the physical environment, but every time I tried to talk to someone at the supermarket, they all ran away from me before I could embrace them in a big, loving hug. In desperation, I tried showing off by licking the escalator handles at Coles but that didn’t seem to make people want to talk to me either.

On a totally unrelated note, I’m now feeling a bit feverish and have a dry cough. Probably no big deal.

Anyway, because of my failure to connect with people in the real world, I decided instead to try this ‘social media’ that everyone always talks about. I thought I’d tell you quickly how I've gone with each one I've tried so far:

1. MySpace: This was the obvious place for me to start, as this is where I spent so much time curating my identity when I was younger. I went to find my page, but was horrified to learn that it doesn't exist anymore. Even the edgy quotes I found from Webcrawler seem to have been taken down. Sad.

2. Twitter: I made an account and quickly found a guy that kept calling everyone ‘climatards’, which I thought sounded pretty funny, so I followed him and tried to talk to him. But he kept quoting The New Daily and abusing people who were criticising Scott Morrison (which seemed to be almost everyone). Prospects of making friends on here seem poor; it just feels like a place that people shout at each other.

3. Facebook: I had heard that there’s a thing called ‘people you might know’ on Facebook, so I thought it would be a great platform for extending my contacts. Apparently this doesn’t work with just 3 friends. I did see an interesting ad for Wish which I liked, but I don’t think that will help me make friends.



4. Instagram: This looks to be a very interesting networking tool – people post a lot of photos of food. I found someone who posted a particularly nice-looking omelette and I ‘commented’ on it to say “that’s a really nice-looking omelette. will you be my friend?”. They haven’t replied yet, but I’m hopeful.

5. LinkedIn: Seems to just feature a whole heap of people who call themselves ‘a disruptor’, which makes it all seem very chaotic and not a great place to make friends.

6. TikTok: I read that this was a really popular thing for young people to do, and involves videos. I made a couple of videos of me talking to Mr. Tebbitt and was about to upload them, but then got distracted by a meme involving throwing a cheese slice at things. So I broke into someone's house and made a video of me throwing a cheese slice at their dog:



I then caught Simone looking at me with deep sadness in her eyes (I think she has a problem with sliced cheese - lactose intolerant?), and now I’m deep in a shame spiral. TikTok is not looking good.

There are apparently different types of apps that I can use to connect with real people, so I’ll be looking at these in the coming week or so.

My journey for a human relationship continues in earnest.

What I’m thankful for:

My friend Proper Gander has embraced the power of psychology (and maybe even tapped into the expertise of Dr. Schnitzerhund) in her latest media article. I’m really glad that some troubled folk around the Sweet F.A. will finally receive some much-needed psychological assessment and assistance.

After finishing our match thread with the Bombers last week, I’m really glad to see Metalcrusher back posting in a very prolific way in Bombers match threads. Other teams will surely enjoy the bountiful fruits of his posting in weeks to come!



In the eAFL, my SUNS recorded another famous victory on the weekend – this time against the very brave North Melbourne! Things are looking up, and I think Ben Ainsworth and Brandon Ellis are shining in the virtual football world. Good times.

I'm still doing more drawings and they fill me with joy. I've now got access to software that will turn my drawings into real pictures - I look forward to cutting and pasting some in here next week.

What made me sad:

Sadly, the much-needed assistance offered by PG's thread has come too late for a poster I told you about some weeks ago. A werewolf game was the straw that has almost cancelled the account’s back. Let's hope the foundations are 'laid' for the poster to return in due course.

My team has also started losing some matches of Qooty lately, which isn’t so fun actually. I mean, you spend a whole week bantering and having fun, only for the joy to be so brutally killed on a Sunday afternoon.

On reflection, I feel like killing and eating Tarks’ hamster may have had a profoundly negative impact on his form. Just between you and I, I’m going online shortly to browse for a new pet to help bring back Tarks’ goalkicking form.

Learning of the week:

You know that Zoom chat we had last week?

Well, it turns out that Zoom isn’t such a secure platform after all.

I was browsing… websites… and came upon a video of Simone and I in a fairly compromising position. While I’m not certain that it was stolen from my hard drive by Russian hackers after they covertly spied on our group Zoom chat, I think that’s the most likely cause.

I told Dr. Schnitzerhund that he should probably check that nothing of his has been similarly acquired and misused. He hung up instantly and I haven’t really heard anything from him since, so I assume everything’s fine.

This week I also learned that ‘get laid’ is a highly offensive term to anyone who isn’t an egg or carpet. I will make a mental note to screen for everyone’s willingness to handle such barbed retorts, and will pledge keep a record in my detailed spreadsheet dossier of all posters in the Sweet F.A. so as to avoid offending anyone.

Until next week

- Tang

 

[manangatang]

​

Dear Diary,

A very sagacious and charming person once famously proclaimed: "My loneliness... is killing me", and never have those words resonated with me more than in the last week.

Perhaps it's my failure to engage other actual humans in this time of isolation; perhaps it's the fact that winter's setting in; either way, I feel like even the cheeses are starting to act a little distantly towards me. They seem to be spending more time together and away from me, and appear to share jokes that they quickly stop telling when I enter the cheese room.

Making matters worse is the fact that Dr. Schnitzerhund hasn't been in touch with me (save for a very confusing SMS) since the Russians hacked our Zoom chat and stole all of our files. The message read "Please help; they've found my stash of cured meat pr0n...". I couldn't make any sense of it so I've just ignored it for now, but not being able to call and share my anxieties with him is troublesome.

There was nothing for it but to continue trying to keep myself busy and focus on self-improvement. Accordingly, I decided to turn some of my drawings into real pictures using the computer. I completed a $1,500 online course in Photoshop to upskill myself (can you believe that that course used to cost $25,000?!).

I'll show you just a couple of images that I'm really happy with:


^this is a picture I drew of a lion!


^this one is my favourite - it's an elephant!

Aside from the distraction of my art, I've been trying to make new friends through social media, and have started trying out some dating apps. Here are my findings so far...

Grindr: Before he disappeared, Dr. Schnitzerhund told me that I should look at signing up for this, as it could be a good place to meet friends. I was only on there for a while, but I saw some pictures that reminded me of that banned person who posted that moving image, and I got upset and cancelled my Grindr account.

Elite Singles: This was a little trickier - I tried to sign up, but I'm not sure I qualified as being 'Elite' enough and they didn't let me in. It's a shame really, because the essay I wrote in my application I thought was excellent. It was a first-person narrative from the perspective of a public rubbish bin. Perhaps I'll copy and paste it in here for next week.

I think there's really only one option left for me. It's a dating app that everyone seems to be using, and I think it might be a good idea for me to try.

I'm considering sharing my journey with the entire Sweet F.A. community; I hope they're supportive!

What I’m thankful for:

Particularly in the darkest of times, it's critical to find the light.

Remember how I was so ebullient about other teams getting the chance to enjoy the posting of our friend Crushy in future weeks? Well - it turns out that my very own team was the first in line to enjoy the bounties of his labour! 199 posts might seem like a lot, but from the fingers of Crushy it was just 10 pages of sheer delight.



I'm also just simply delighted that there is yet another support channel open for those who need a little inspiration and joy in their lives. My dear friend brahj has started a thread called #InspirationalPosting and I think it's just swell!

Also, it turns out that two posters who arranged to have their account cancelled really didn't want to leave Bigfooty at all, which is a huge relief! It must have been a simple mistake - perhaps the Russians that stole the video of Simone and I hacked their accounts and asked for their accounts to be cancelled? Anyway, all's well that ends well I guess.

What made me sad:

My beloved Mt. Buller Demons AND the mighty Gold Coast SUNS both lost on the weekend. Losing is starting to not be fun anymore, and I've been getting some messages from people who want me to quit and/or step down and/or cancel my account and/or die. I'm hoping to be able to weather the storm, but it's not been fun getting those sort of messages from my own mother.

I even went to the length of buying Tarks a new pet - it's an Estuary Perch he's named Damian. It was great to see his little face light up when I brought Damian home and organised his tank, and I think they're starting to bond. I'm hoping this will help Tarks to kick goals again, because he's kinda stopped doing that lately.



Learning of the week:

So I ran out of toilet paper during the week, and have little hope of sourcing any more

For a start, I panicked, thinking I could never survive this most accursed set of circumstances. What, am I now expected to be a savage, wiping my crevice on the gardens and hand-rails around Mt. Buller?

Fortunately, I jumped onto Google and found the answer in the form of a new-age cultural movement.

Waffle Stomping.

It's really easy and fun, Diary. Simply enter the shower, turn on the water and do your business. I find that taking your clothes off first helps, but you don't have to.

From there, you just imagine a song is playing in your head (I always think of Nutbush City Limits) and stomp it all into the grate of the shower drain while dancing to that song.

I think I could become a professional Waffle Stomper, and I believe I may never go back to using toilet paper again.

Until next week

- Tang

 

[Tarkyn_24]

Please don’t name my pets for me. I wanted to call him Damien

 

[Grand Uncle Horace]

It is a pity really to post here and ruin the ambience. Mang's weekly reflections are always looked forward to must reads. No-one here quite captures that particular element of these times that can be best described as wistful.

 

[manangatang]

​

Dear Diary,

I can’t believe how much of the week has already slipped by – I’ve been so caught up in having fun on Qinder that I almost forgot!

So far I haven’t really found a ‘match’ (that’s what the people call it), but there are plenty of likely prospects.

The wider community got involved and gave their feedback. According to them, the candidates considered most fitting for me are Tigerturbulance, harry000 and TheInjuryFactory.

I’m a bit scared of all of them, but I guess it’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. I'm just going to swipe right on all of them but in the meantime and see where it takes me. If that fails, there are plenty of other options.

I must say that things have otherwise gone sour for me at the Snow Dome. My erstwhile friends, Mr. Tebbitt and Simone, have been cheating on me behind my back.

Look at what I found while on Qinder…


Anyway, we move on and keep the hope of human connection alive.

What I’m thankful for:

There are a few things that made me a bit sad this week, and I found it really hard to see light at the end of the tunnel.

I read some old notes from Dr. Schnitzerhund to see what he’d advise me to do. I recalled that he once said that, in times where I’m not able to be happy, I should seek to make other people happy. Through this, I may allow myself to feel happy.

I decided that a good idea might be to do some crafting for my teammates at the Mt. Buller Demons (who are probably feeling down because of how terrible each of them has been at Qooty lately).

Proper Gander is big on interior decorating and LOVES her terrariums. I went through my old collection of dolls and made a really wonderful lamp for her out of one of her terrariums – I’m sure she’ll love it!



Tarkyn_24 loves to mix up some phat beats on his midi deck, but it was SO PLAIN AND BLACK. So I decided to give it a bit of a tszuj…



As for Yakker, well I know that he is ALWAYS on his phone, so I borrowed his phone case and gave it a bit of flair!



I’m already feeling better about myself from having done just these simple little things.

What made me sad:

Once again, Qooty is negatively impacting my state of mind.

First, the SUNS lost to the ****ing Bulldogs on the weekend, and then on Sunday the Demons lost to the Furies.

This has only intensified the level of hatred and abuse directed towards me, which has led me to set up an email filter on a few common terms. "#sackmanang", "you are a ****ing campaigner", "**** you loser", "you'll never find a friend", "w***er", "dickhead", "shit for brains"

I'm a little torn on whether this was amazing or horrible, but Yakker cooked Tarks' new pet fish, Damian. He made us a Estuary Perch fish tacos, with avocado, lime, green olive and pistachio, served with a green mango salad. I cried with every delicious, harrowing mouthful.

I was also sad to note further impact of these tough economic times brought about by social isolation and global economic suppression. Our friend Santoz appears to have lost his job as a Humour Coach. On the positive side of things, he seems to be forging a new career as a Scoreboard Pressure Act King (mental note: see if you can find pictures or stories of the Scoreboard Pressure Act Kingdom, as this seems like a wonderful place).

Learning of the week:

Qinder is a great and terrible place.

It's a great resource for finding other people to meet and make friends with, but I've gotta say that not everyone has pure motives.

I was approached by someone on there - a guy who insisted on being called SNAKE. I think his name was CALL ME SNAKE. Anyway, this is what he asked me...



Of course, being really keen to make friends, I said 'yes' straight away, even though I didn't really know what a reach around was. I guess I just assumed that it was something that human friends naturally did for other human friends, and probably involved reaching to hand them a beer or something.

He asked me to meet him in a local Bunnings carpark at 10:00pm on Sunday night. That sounded completely fine to me, and I must admit to my heart skipping a beat a little when I got the invitation - he said he was asking 'for a friend', and I was looking for a friend!

It turns out that he wasn't expecting me to reach for a beer for him, but it was something completely different (and too rude to talk about in here, diary). I felt so bad for the misunderstanding that I did as I was asked, apologised and left.

Lesson learned.

Until next week

- Tang

 

[Tigerturbulance]

View attachment 862747​

Dear Diary,

I can’t believe how much of the week has already slipped by – I’ve been so caught up in having fun on Qinder that I almost forgot!

So far I haven’t really found a ‘match’ (that’s what the people call it), but there are plenty of likely prospects.

The wider community got involved and gave their feedback. According to them, the candidates considered most fitting for me are Tigerturbulance, harry000 and TheInjuryFactory.

I’m a bit scared of all of them, but I guess it’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. I'm just going to swipe right on all of them but in the meantime and see where it takes me. If that fails, there are plenty of other options.

I must say that things have otherwise gone sour for me at the Snow Dome. My erstwhile friends, Mr. Tebbitt and Simone, have been cheating on me behind my back.

Look at what I found while on Qinder…
View attachment 862750
View attachment 862751
Anyway, we move on and keep the hope of human connection alive.

What I’m thankful for:

There are a few things that made me a bit sad this week, and I found it really hard to see light at the end of the tunnel.

I read some old notes from Dr. Schnitzerhund to see what he’d advise me to do. I recalled that he once said that, in times where I’m not able to be happy, I should seek to make other people happy. Through this, I may allow myself to feel happy.

I decided that a good idea might be to do some crafting for my teammates at the Mt. Buller Demons (who are probably feeling down because of how terrible each of them has been at Qooty lately).

Proper Gander is big on interior decorating and LOVES her terrariums. I went through my old collection of dolls and made a really wonderful lamp for her out of one of her terrariums – I’m sure she’ll love it!

View attachment 862753

Tarkyn_24 loves to mix up some phat beats on his midi deck, but it was SO PLAIN AND BLACK. So I decided to give it a bit of a tszuj…

View attachment 862754

As for Yakker, well I know that he is ALWAYS on his phone, so I borrowed his phone case and gave it a bit of flair!

View attachment 862755

I’m already feeling better about myself from having done just these simple little things.

What made me sad:

Once again, Qooty is negatively impacting my state of mind.

First, the SUNS lost to the ******* Bulldogs on the weekend, and then on Sunday the Demons lost to the Furies.

This has only intensified the level of hatred and abuse directed towards me, which has led me to set up an email filter on a few common terms. "#sackmanang", "you are a ******* campaigner", "fu** you loser", "you'll never find a friend", "w***er", "dickhead", "shit for brains"

I'm a little torn on whether this was amazing or horrible, but Yakker cooked Tarks' new pet fish, Damian. He made us a Estuary Perch fish tacos, with avocado, lime, green olive and pistachio, served with a green mango salad. I cried with every delicious, harrowing mouthful.

I was also sad to note further impact of these tough economic times brought about by social isolation and global economic suppression. Our friend Santoz appears to have lost his job as a Humour Coach. On the positive side of things, he seems to be forging a new career as a Scoreboard Pressure Act King (mental note: see if you can find pictures or stories of the Scoreboard Pressure Act Kingdom, as this seems like a wonderful place).

Learning of the week:

Qinder is a great and terrible place.

It's a great resource for finding other people to meet and make friends with, but I've gotta say that not everyone has pure motives.

I was approached by someone on there - a guy who insisted on being called SNAKE. I think his name was CALL ME SNAKE. Anyway, this is what he asked me...

View attachment 862767

Of course, being really keen to make friends, I said 'yes' straight away, even though I didn't really know what a reach around was. I guess I just assumed that it was something that human friends naturally did for other human friends, and probably involved reaching to hand them a beer or something.

He asked me to meet him in a local Bunnings carpark at 10:00pm on Sunday night. That sounded completely fine to me, and I must admit to my heart skipping a beat a little when I got the invitation - he said he was asking 'for a friend', and I was looking for a friend!

It turns out that he wasn't expecting me to reach for a beer for him, but it was something completely different (and too rude to talk about in here, diary). I felt so bad for the misunderstanding that I did as I was asked, apologised and left.

Lesson learned.

Until next week

- Tang

im outside now, come out and lets ruck

 

[Proper Gander]

View attachment 862747​

Dear Diary,

I can’t believe how much of the week has already slipped by – I’ve been so caught up in having fun on Qinder that I almost forgot!

So far I haven’t really found a ‘match’ (that’s what the people call it), but there are plenty of likely prospects.

The wider community got involved and gave their feedback. According to them, the candidates considered most fitting for me are Tigerturbulance, harry000 and TheInjuryFactory.

I’m a bit scared of all of them, but I guess it’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. I'm just going to swipe right on all of them but in the meantime and see where it takes me. If that fails, there are plenty of other options.

I must say that things have otherwise gone sour for me at the Snow Dome. My erstwhile friends, Mr. Tebbitt and Simone, have been cheating on me behind my back.

Look at what I found while on Qinder…
View attachment 862750
View attachment 862751
Anyway, we move on and keep the hope of human connection alive.

What I’m thankful for:

There are a few things that made me a bit sad this week, and I found it really hard to see light at the end of the tunnel.

I read some old notes from Dr. Schnitzerhund to see what he’d advise me to do. I recalled that he once said that, in times where I’m not able to be happy, I should seek to make other people happy. Through this, I may allow myself to feel happy.

I decided that a good idea might be to do some crafting for my teammates at the Mt. Buller Demons (who are probably feeling down because of how terrible each of them has been at Qooty lately).

Proper Gander is big on interior decorating and LOVES her terrariums. I went through my old collection of dolls and made a really wonderful lamp for her out of one of her terrariums – I’m sure she’ll love it!

View attachment 862753

Tarkyn_24 loves to mix up some phat beats on his midi deck, but it was SO PLAIN AND BLACK. So I decided to give it a bit of a tszuj…

View attachment 862754

As for Yakker, well I know that he is ALWAYS on his phone, so I borrowed his phone case and gave it a bit of flair!

View attachment 862755

I’m already feeling better about myself from having done just these simple little things.

What made me sad:

Once again, Qooty is negatively impacting my state of mind.

First, the SUNS lost to the ******* Bulldogs on the weekend, and then on Sunday the Demons lost to the Furies.

This has only intensified the level of hatred and abuse directed towards me, which has led me to set up an email filter on a few common terms. "#sackmanang", "you are a ******* campaigner", "fu** you loser", "you'll never find a friend", "w***er", "dickhead", "shit for brains"

I'm a little torn on whether this was amazing or horrible, but Yakker cooked Tarks' new pet fish, Damian. He made us a Estuary Perch fish tacos, with avocado, lime, green olive and pistachio, served with a green mango salad. I cried with every delicious, harrowing mouthful.

I was also sad to note further impact of these tough economic times brought about by social isolation and global economic suppression. Our friend Santoz appears to have lost his job as a Humour Coach. On the positive side of things, he seems to be forging a new career as a Scoreboard Pressure Act King (mental note: see if you can find pictures or stories of the Scoreboard Pressure Act Kingdom, as this seems like a wonderful place).

Learning of the week:

Qinder is a great and terrible place.

It's a great resource for finding other people to meet and make friends with, but I've gotta say that not everyone has pure motives.

I was approached by someone on there - a guy who insisted on being called SNAKE. I think his name was CALL ME SNAKE. Anyway, this is what he asked me...

View attachment 862767

Of course, being really keen to make friends, I said 'yes' straight away, even though I didn't really know what a reach around was. I guess I just assumed that it was something that human friends naturally did for other human friends, and probably involved reaching to hand them a beer or something.

He asked me to meet him in a local Bunnings carpark at 10:00pm on Sunday night. That sounded completely fine to me, and I must admit to my heart skipping a beat a little when I got the invitation - he said he was asking 'for a friend', and I was looking for a friend!

It turns out that he wasn't expecting me to reach for a beer for him, but it was something completely different (and too rude to talk about in here, diary). I felt so bad for the misunderstanding that I did as I was asked, apologised and left.

Lesson learned.

Until next week

- Tang

Is it my imagination or are you getting weirder?