Review R20: Port v Hawthorn Review

[Jakko]

Rodan you star. 13 touches 1 tackle, 1 possie in the last when we needed ya.

Personifies everything that is wrong with our senior players.

Oh but he had some bounces and ducked and weaved and oh didnt the commentators love him. "Should never be dropped again" - 95% of media.

 

[Forzaport]

Did anyone under the gun save their careers today. Probably not.

Matt Thomas has probably earned himself another year.

 

[kaysee]

I've been having problems cutting my lawn, so during the week I bought a new lawn mower. Today was a perfect day for mowing the lawn... sunny day... Port were playing... and I was expecting good things. My new new mower had 4 blades to cut faster through the grass and I was so excited to get started. First outer loop of the area was great, grass flying into the catcher as it quickly filled and I emptied into the "Green" bin with a smile on my face.

As I cut further into the centre of my lawn I could smell something was off. I looked down around me and I had trodden in about 5 mounds of dog shit, it was under my shoes, the new mower had sliced through some, so now it was in the catcher and was covering my 4 new shiney blades under the machine. I emptied the next catchment whilst holding my nose because the stench of shit was too much to bare. I couldn't leave the lawn half mowed, so I continued cutting and begrudgingly putting up with the stench of dog shit until the task was done.

Whilst showering and returning to watch Port's last quarter I stopped and thought a bit about my lawn. I want to have a nice lawn, one to be proud of, one to show off when visitors are over and one for kids to play on. I thought my last mower sucked and the new one would make achieving a great lawn that much easier.... but after mowing it today with a brand new mower I came to a sad realisation...

It doesn't matter what type of lawn mower I have... my lawn will stink if there is shit on it. I either have to get rid of my dogs that shit on the lawn or teach them to shit elsewhere.

I looked up and Port players on the screen, looked at Buddha in the box and I thought: it doesn't matter what coach we have... our team will still stink if it contains shit. We either have to get rid of those who produce shit or teach them how not to.

Thankfully none of my dogs are named: Logan, Trengove, McCarthy, Lobbe, Chaplin, Westhoff, Rodan or Cassisi... otherwise it would be a simple choice to get rid of them.

That is all.

 

[tribey]

Rodan you star. 13 touches 1 tackle, 1 possie in the last when we needed ya.

Personifies everything that is wrong with our senior players.

Oh but he had some bounces and ducked and weaved and oh didnt the commentators love him. "Should never be dropped again" - 95% of media.

Can't believe Colbert pumped up his tyres precisely in the middle of his usual Q4 disappearing act.

 

[Burningleviathan]

Meh, not to disappointed. Never thought we would get close. The fact we got within 17 was good, that fact we lost by 70 odd, not so much.

I think I mentioned in the game thread that I thought our performance would get perspective coaches thinking that there is something to work with, that we aren't complete dog poop. I think that happened. How to work our forward entries, some skill improvements and increased fitness would make us a hell of a lot better. I'm sure a lot of coaches would back themselves in to improve those areas.

In other words, i don't think we turned off any possible coaching options from taking up an offer, maybe even realise it won't be such a bad gig. This is what I look for in the next three weeks. Nothing so horrible as the GWS game and maybe a decent coach is still a possibility.

 

[ctpower]

2009 could be a bust too, considering that we had three top 16 picks. I realise injury has played its part, but when you see guys like Gunston (think he was from 2009) and Talia strutting their stuff, you realise how badly we got it wrong with Moore and Pittard.

This is a massive worry.
i am still holding out hope that those 3 picks will come good but i am very worried.

 

[b0ydman]

I've been having problems cutting my lawn, so during the week I bought a new lawn mower. Today was a perfect day for mowing the lawn... sunny day... Port were playing... and I was expecting good things. My new new mower had 4 blades to cut faster through the grass and I was so excited to get started. First outer loop of the area was great, grass flying into the catcher as it quickly filled and I emptied into the "Green" bin with a smile on my face.

As I cut further into the centre of my lawn I could smell something was off. I looked down around me and I had trodden in about 5 mounds of dog shit, it was under my shoes, the new mower had sliced through some, so now it was in the catcher and was covering my 4 new shiney blades under the machine. I emptied the next catchment whilst holding my nose because the stench of shit was too much to bare. I couldn't leave the lawn half mowed, so I continued cutting and begrudgingly putting up with the stench of dog shit until the task was done.

Whilst showering and returning to watch Port's last quarter I stopped and thought a bit about my lawn. I want to have a nice lawn, one to be proud of, one to show off when visitors are over and one for kids to play on. I thought my last mower sucked and the new one would make achieving a great lawn that much easier.... but after mowing it today with a brand new mower I came to a sad realisation...

It doesn't matter what type of lawn mower I have... my lawn will stink if there is shit on it. I either have to get rid of my dogs that shit on the lawn or teach them to shit elsewhere.

I looked up and Port players on the screen, looked at Buddha in the box and I thought: it doesn't matter what coach we have... our team will still stink if it contains shit. We either have to get rid of those who produce shit or teach them how not to.

Thankfully none of my dogs are named: Logan, Trengove, McCarthy, Lobbe, Chaplin, Westhoff, Rodan or Cassisi... otherwise it would be a simple choice to get rid of them.

That is all.

You sir, are a poet.
brilliant

 

[TheArtfulTodger]

Hartlett - He was living in Turnover city, most of his kicks were shanks, very poor

I wondered at the time watching the game if he is not kicking at training to avoid putting stress on his 'strings.

 

[Rowd072]

I know a lot of people on this board don't like Carlisle and want to trade him but I must say, when he doesn't play, our defence looks just awful.

 

[Ebert80]

Carlisle plays for Essendon.

 

[BIG MATTY T]

Hartlett and Moore are learning too well from Trengove. Lots of huff and puff, and push and shove when the ball is 100m away and nothing resembling hardness at the ball when it is anywhere near them.

Totally agree with this

Moore just pissed me off off him completely and trengove needs to bite as well as he barks next season get some guns...
Hartlett he has the strut but he lacks heart...and there is a bit of dirty sniper about him which I don't mind if he can back it up


Positives

Boak best game I have seen from him this year was simply awesome if your staying do this more please
Shultz awesome if he was on the opposite team today he would of kicked 13


More negatives

Our back line I mean WTF what happened to these guys from the start of the year?

Chaplin you are a disgrace same with your mate trengove

Trengove you really need to get a body that matches your talk you were a rag doll who out positioned today all day

Phief good and bad

Hartlett...I laugh at you really I do...

Can't bag blee first game and all but his mates really didn't lead him well

 

[klem22]

I know a lot of people on this board don't like Carlisle and want to trade him but I must say, when he doesn't play, our defence looks just awful.

Are you talking about SpongeBOB AliPATTY Carlisle

 

[King_Tredrea]

Of our 3 KPD's, Carlile is the only one with the vaguest clue how to defend

 

[JuniorBurger]

Fox just showed a replay of the clash between Hamish and Cyril. Rioli was trying his best to block Hammers run forward they came together and rioli drops about a second later. Not entirely sure what the MRP will do with that.

Not a lot in it.

 

[Rowd072]

Carlisle plays for Essendon.

Thanks for that.

 

[findonite]

I've been having problems cutting my lawn, so during the week I bought a new lawn mower. Today was a perfect day for mowing the lawn... sunny day... Port were playing... and I was expecting good things. My new new mower had 4 blades to cut faster through the grass and I was so excited to get started. First outer loop of the area was great, grass flying into the catcher as it quickly filled and I emptied into the "Green" bin with a smile on my face.

As I cut further into the centre of my lawn I could smell something was off. I looked down around me and I had trodden in about 5 mounds of dog shit, it was under my shoes, the new mower had sliced through some, so now it was in the catcher and was covering my 4 new shiney blades under the machine. I emptied the next catchment whilst holding my nose because the stench of shit was too much to bare. I couldn't leave the lawn half mowed, so I continued cutting and begrudgingly putting up with the stench of dog shit until the task was done.

Whilst showering and returning to watch Port's last quarter I stopped and thought a bit about my lawn. I want to have a nice lawn, one to be proud of, one to show off when visitors are over and one for kids to play on. I thought my last mower sucked and the new one would make achieving a great lawn that much easier.... but after mowing it today with a brand new mower I came to a sad realisation...

It doesn't matter what type of lawn mower I have... my lawn will stink if there is shit on it. I either have to get rid of my dogs that shit on the lawn or teach them to shit elsewhere.

I looked up and Port players on the screen, looked at Buddha in the box and I thought: it doesn't matter what coach we have... our team will still stink if it contains shit. We either have to get rid of those who produce shit or teach them how not to.

Thankfully none of my dogs are named: Logan, Trengove, McCarthy, Lobbe, Chaplin, Westhoff, Rodan or Cassisi... otherwise it would be a simple choice to get rid of them.

That is all.

You missed the obvious parallel - that same shit could also be fertilizer, if we are prepared to compost it with other garbage we produce at the Club....but otherwise, I mostly agree with the analogy...

 

[Schulzenfest]

Boak: His performance today gave me a lot of hope that he'd be on our list next year. 31 disposals and a goal in a 12 goal loss to the reigning premiers is a very, very good day out.

Brad Ebert: Best game he's played in a while. Always racks up the ball, but today he was getting the ball in useful positions and using it well, which had been absent from his game in the last couple of weeks. Great goal too.

Schulz: Legend. Playing against a very good defender in Gibson and clearly got the better of him two weeks off of his return from a life-threatening injury. Jay Schulz is Port Adelaide.

Kornes: Usually I leave a game having barely noticed him and go home to find out he had 30 touches. Today I left the game thinking he'd had a heap of it and found out he'd only had 21. Maybe that means he was using them better?

Cassisi: I literally can't remember a single thing that he did.

Westhoff: Excellent in the first quarter. Anonymous from there onwards.

Pearce: I wonder if one day the Facebook morons will realize that there's more to being a hardworker than running blindly into your teammates (memo Tom Logan). Pearce works harder than just about any of our other players to win the ball and to move it forward every single week. Another 25-ish possession game full of hard offensive running, handball receives and long direct ball movement from him in a team that needs a couple more Danyle Pearce's.

Redden: Should be No. 1 ruck. He's a much better ruckman than Lobbe. Liked his first quarter, but he faded from then on. Will be a gun ruckman after a couple of pre-seasons under someone who isn't Cam Falloon.

Hartlett: Excellent reader of the play who probably stopped more Hawthorn goals than any of our actual defenders did with his reading of the play and strong marking. I actually quite like him as a HB because of his ability in those areas, but with our midfield it's a luxury that we can't really afford. I'd love to have two of him.

Brett Ebert: Played a higher HF role and played it quite well IMO. As much as I bag him, half the reasons I bag him are the coach's fault, and maybe the new coach will use him better. He can be quite useful as a high HF as long as it's made very clear that Schulz is the No. 1 target and Brett better stay out of his way, and he did today.

Lobbe: If we could Frankenstein Lobbe, Redden and Renouf together wed have a very good ruckman. Lobbe's around the ground ability, Renouf's sheer hitout numbers and Redden's hitouts to advantage combined would be a very good ruckman. As it is, Lobbe will only ever be a second ruck at best IMO. I hope the new coach has him learning a lot about playing as a forward in the off-season.

Broadbent: Excellent goal to start the game, but spent the rest of the game looking like ineffectual '11 version Broadbent. We expect and need better from Broady than what he provided today.

Trengove: Like I said in another thread, all we can hope is that he's having a Surjan '11-esque aberration and that the new coach will put him back on the right path. Arguably WOG today.

Logan: The only guy who would challenge Trengove for WOG honours, the same way he challenges for WOG honours every week. I genuinely think he is the worst player of his age in the AFL. Slow, fumbly, very dumb defensively, terrible kick. Apart from his workrate, he has literally no positives to his game. Replace him with Surjan or even Jonas and we're instantly a 4 or 5 goal better side. I don't care if Hocking goes back to his 18 defender flood next week, as long as he drops Logan (and leaves out D. Stew) I'll be happy with him over Primus.

Thomas: Typical Thomas game. A heap of effort for very little reward. About 15 touches, most of which were ineffectual. He's 25 and he's played nearly 100 games, he's not gonna get any better. I'll be very interested to see whether the next coach is as tolerant of this low level of performance as the current coaching panel are.

Pfeiffer: Did some good things, but overall nowhere near as good as he has been lately. Well done to the coaching panel for killing the confidence of one of the very few actual contributors we had.

Chaplin: Beaten by a non-forward. Shit effort.

P. Stewart: Ineffectual. Those couple of good games he played are starting to look like they were anomalies.

Rodan: Bring back Rodin! Bring him back so he can only have 13 touches,only have 1 tackle, run himself into trouble numerous times and do absolutely nothing in the second half. Every single one of the reasons he was dropped was on display today. Should find himself back in the SANFL.

Moore: Totally ineffectual. Might need a rest, he wouldn't be used to playing this much football in a row.

Blee: Did a few good things in the early part of the game. Didn't notice him much from then on, which isn't necessarily a bad thing for a defender.

McCarthy: Came on fresh as the sub and still failed to provide anything useful. Surely running out of chances.

 

[Portmanteau]

A couple of random thoughts

- While some kickouts were typically dreadful, we were able to create a few Joe the Geese by busting the zone/press. We almost never do that; pleasing.

- Buddha made anti hero ball comment after the game. Promising, if he can stamp it out.

 

[tealpower]

I know a lot of people on this board don't like Carlisle and want to trade him but I must say, when he doesn't play, our defence looks just awful.

Disagree Defence looks awful without Surjan, he seems to organise the backs

 

[Oliver King]

Cassisi's lazy kick on the ground, followed by Logan's fumbly dropped mark, which led to a Hawthorn goal, was one of worst pieces of play for the day.

 

[Andre]

Cassisi: I literally can't remember a single thing that he did.

If I didn't notice Cassisi at all it'd be a step up. At least it'd be then progressing from setting a bad example to setting no example.

 

[Portia]

I thought I saw Cassisi do a few good things.

 

[Portmanteau]

Another Hawthorn game, Shaun Burgoyne non-factor as usual.

 

[El_Scorcho]

I thought I saw Cassisi do a few good things.

All I can remember was the Herp soccer off the ground straight to a
hawthorn player duly followed by the Logan Derp flying for a contest he could never influence and allowing Puopolo to run into an open goal.

 

[LeoMessi]

Can someone please tell me that Surjan is injured? That's the only way i will understand why Logan gets a game before him...

Thomas is another one who thinks he's a Judd or Ablett. So many times when he gets the ball instead of releasing, he just gets caught trying to weave through traffic.

Trengove had a shocker. Outpositioned, outsmarted, outbodied but the dud Hale.