Match Thread Season 01, Round 1: Keptin Mafia (KEP) vs Fulmina Qricket Club (FUL) at ChippyBet Stadium, Keptin Reserve

[philreich]

View attachment 2196078

Pfft - some bloke is in the Guinness Book of Records for eating 27 whole chickens in a single sitting.

 

[Gralin]

Pfft - some bloke is in the Guinness Book of Records for eating 27 whole chickens in a single sitting.

 

[myblueroan]

Pfft - some bloke is in the Guinness Book of Records for eating 27 whole chickens in a single sitting.

Bwaarckkkk! Faster! Stupid car.

 

[Jabba73]

For MP_ and for one week only, I will hit a four for every chicken nugget he eats.

You had a good run.

 

[Jabba73]

Bwaarckkkk! Faster! Stupid car.
View attachment 2196102

Needs more horsepower, just sayin’

 

[Tonga Bob]

Pfft - some bloke is in the Guinness Book of Records for eating 27 whole chickens in a single sitting.

 

[MP_]

View attachment 2196078

what a way to be paralysed, regardless of, if it happens to me hopefully I can still swing a bat and get someone to run for me.

 

[MP_]

Still waiting on tony 's pitch report with the WeatherWall (tm)

 

[Jabba73]

I miss his “petch” reports with the keys

 

[MP_]

I miss his “petch” reports with the keys

It really was an enjoyable part of the pre match commentary. Loved seeing the old key get brought out testing the depth of the cracks.

 

[moginie]

 

[tony]

Still waiting on tony 's pitch report with the WeatherWall (tm)

Since you ask for my pitch report, here it is, including the famous Key Test and WeatherWall




Well, it really is absolutely magnificent out here in the middle of the ChippyBet Stadium, Keptin Reserve, and the pitch looks to me to be every bit as good as the weather. It's a magnificent looking pitch, where the preparation is as mysterious as the men behind the scenes. Now, let's get straight into it, what we have here is a truly fascinating surface. The groundskeeper, under the watchful eye of the Keptin crew, has apparently gone above and beyond.



EXTRAORDINARY! The key simply won't penetrate the pitch at all! This pitch, my friends, has all the hallmarks of freshly poured concrete. Forget the usual cracks and divots, this one's rock solid and ready to test both batsmen and bowlers alike.

Now, if there's one thing we can be certain of, it's that there are no skeletons hiding under this pitch. The only thing buried here is any hope for spinners to extract turn.

So, expect a high scoring game with plenty of pace and bounce. The batsmen will be licking their lips at the prospect of piling on the runs, but the bowlers will have their work cut out trying to extract anything from this surface.

Now let's have a look at our Keptin Fried Chicken WeatherWall



The wind direction they tell me is going to be basically from the north today, and hardly anything at the moment registering in terms of speed, a very tiny little registration there, but it'll probably gust up to about 10 later on. Ideal for those lofted shots straight down the ground without worrying about the breeze taking it off course.

Coming down to the air temperature, at the moment its a lovely comfortable 18, and the sun is blazing down on us all. The humidity? Well, that's just below average, sitting at around about 40%, which means no sweat, literally, for the players. Good news for anyone who hates changing gloves mid over.

The players' comfort level is quite high, up to 28, largely thanks to this glorious sunshine. And I dare say, the more 'sturdy' batsmen out there will be pleased, they’ll be aiming for the boundaries and sparing themselves those dreaded quick singles. Perfect weather for cricket.

All indicators show we're set for a thrilling day of cricket under these steady conditions, with the barometer very stable at 1,021. Get ready for a cracking contest out there.

Back to you in the commentary box, Richie.

 

[FootyGuy13]

You'd be surprised with how much "being outside" and "hanging out with people" keeps you pre-occupied from contributing to a match thread.

 

[MP_]

You'd be surprised with how much "being outside" and "hanging out with people" keeps you pre-occupied from contributing to a match thread.

What is this ‘being outside’ and ‘hanging out with people’ thing you speak of.

 

[FootyGuy13]

What is this ‘being outside’ and ‘hanging out with people’ thing you speak of.

Other people seem to like it but I keep ending up annoying that lot.

 

[Tonga Bob]

I went to the beach today. There were people there so I took a picture and left.

 

[Gralin]

I went to the beach today. There were people there so I took a picture and left.

We had a great time

 

[tony]

You'd be surprised with how much "being outside" and "hanging out with people" keeps you pre-occupied from contributing to a match thread.

We are all a bit pre-occupied with our first annual Keptin Mafia picnic.

 

[FootyGuy13]

We are all a bit pre-occupied with our first annual Keptin Mafia picnic.

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por_please_ya and MP_ seem to be enjoying thier butt battle.

 

[KBLT]

I went to the beach today. There were people there so I took a picture and left.

This you?

 

[Chipmunk]

We are all a bit pre-occupied with our first annual Keptin Mafia picnic.

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Check out MWPP telling everyone we would practice qricket rather than eating, and only myblueroan bringing a bat!

 

[myblueroan]

Check out MWPP telling everyone we would practice qricket rather than eating, and only myblueroan bringing a bat!

Haha. Trick the newbie. But luckily the grass was excellent. And my batting is ..well..no..it's ah...how important is it to actually hit the ball do you think?

 

[Chipmunk]

Haha. Trick the newbie. But luckily the grass was excellent. And my batting is ..well..no..it's ah...how important is it to actually hit the ball do you think?

Put it this way, you’re not meant to be eating the grass. You’re not Matt Rowell

 

[MP_]

por_please_ya and MP_ seem to be enjoying thier butt battle.

por_please_ya is clearly not doing her squats at training yet I have buns of steel.

 

[MP_]

This you?
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Tom hanks body double from castaway.