Grand Uncle Horace
Shake down the thunder
Yes I know cancellations, lost baggage, pricing and queues and the general ennui of having to hang around will feature. And to be sure these ‘features’ of airline travel are somewhere on my list.
Top of my list by the length of Runway 1 at Tullamarine are obnoxious children and their odious parents.
On really busy routes like Melbourne -Sydney, domestic carriers should provide for family friendly flights at a heavily discounted price. The same innovation should be mandatory on long international flights.
Balancing this adults like me would pay more - 10% maybe - travelling with the joy of knowing some malevolent child of Satan will not be kicking the back of your chair, shrieking away etc.
….. And not having to argue with their gormless parent(s) when you politely ask them to control their child and they don’t then slightly irritate them when you say you have a 2nd hand parachute in the overhead luggage that you are happy to put on their child. Of course my efforts to educate said gormless parents on nature v nurture debates are often sadly wasted.
A friend had an acquaintance who took her famously difficult three youngsters off to London.
My friend, “However did you manage with the kids.”
The mother, “It was fine. I thought it through and used some mild sleeping pills”.
My friend, “That was a bit risky. How did the kids respond?”
The mother, ”What! No! I’d never drug the kids. I took the pills. It was great. I figured they couldn’t run away or cause too much trouble and besides there were lots of other adults around.”
Lest you think I am some kind of monster, I am not suggesting banning children flying on adult preferred flights. Of course they can and their doting folks can pay 50% more than the adult fare. While on board children would be placed at the back of the plane in a sound proofed plexiglass glass closed area, like at Ikea or some pubs.
Top of my list by the length of Runway 1 at Tullamarine are obnoxious children and their odious parents.
On really busy routes like Melbourne -Sydney, domestic carriers should provide for family friendly flights at a heavily discounted price. The same innovation should be mandatory on long international flights.
Balancing this adults like me would pay more - 10% maybe - travelling with the joy of knowing some malevolent child of Satan will not be kicking the back of your chair, shrieking away etc.
….. And not having to argue with their gormless parent(s) when you politely ask them to control their child and they don’t then slightly irritate them when you say you have a 2nd hand parachute in the overhead luggage that you are happy to put on their child. Of course my efforts to educate said gormless parents on nature v nurture debates are often sadly wasted.
A friend had an acquaintance who took her famously difficult three youngsters off to London.
My friend, “However did you manage with the kids.”
The mother, “It was fine. I thought it through and used some mild sleeping pills”.
My friend, “That was a bit risky. How did the kids respond?”
The mother, ”What! No! I’d never drug the kids. I took the pills. It was great. I figured they couldn’t run away or cause too much trouble and besides there were lots of other adults around.”
Lest you think I am some kind of monster, I am not suggesting banning children flying on adult preferred flights. Of course they can and their doting folks can pay 50% more than the adult fare. While on board children would be placed at the back of the plane in a sound proofed plexiglass glass closed area, like at Ikea or some pubs.
