2017 Best 22

[Nathan Detroit]

The Old Man and the Sea is the story of a fight between an elderly, accomplished fisherman, Santiago, and a really big fish. Like… HUGE. The story opens with Santiago suffering eighty-four days without catching a fish because he’s the unluckiest son-of-a-bitch on planet earth. Honestly, if you were in a boat for eighty-four days, it’d be hard to NOT catch a fish… even by accident. Santiago was so unlucky that his apprentice, Manolin, was forbidden by his Ma and Pa to fish with him. But as The Fresh Prince used to say, ‘Parents Just Don’t Understand’. So the boy visits Santiago’s shack anyway. Ignoring the inherent risks of unsupervised playtime with an elderly man who talks to himself, Manolin helps out, moving Santiago’s fishing gear, making food and talking about baseball. Especially Joe DiMaggio; who used to bump fuzzies with Marilyn Monroe. The next day, Santiago tells Manolin that he’s going way out into the Gulf Stream. WAY OUT north of Cuba. Lady luck is returning! On the eighty-fifth day of his crappy luck, Santiago drops his lines, and by noon, gets a bite from what feels like a big ass fish. He’s sure it’s a winner. He fights and fights and fights but can’t pull the monster in. Santiago’s leaky old boat is pulled by the fish for two days and nights as he holds on for dear life. Even though he’s bloody and beat, Santiago begins to appreciate this mighty adversary. He starts calling him “brother” or maybe even, “bro.” It’s sort of a love story if you really think about it. And like most romantic comedies, the reader pictures a delightful outfit changing montage, followed by the inevitable interspecies wedding. But on the third day, Santiago is freakin’ EXHAUSTED, and decides he just wants the fish to do what he says and not always swim wherever it wants. So he stabs it. With a f*cking harpoon. It’s a mess. Super gross. Blood everywhere. Because, like many men his age, Santiago has difficulty expressing his emotions and fears with words – instead giving in to base desires – and imposing his gigantically terrible positions on any given subject through unblinking violence. Typical. Anyway, he straps the marlin to the side of his skiff and hits the road home, ready to act like a total show off to everyone and probably gouge people on the price. But guess what? Pretty soon sharks begin to attack the bleeding marlin’s carcass, because we all know, life is a tragic opera and just when you think you’ve finally found something good and true, sharks come along and rip it all to f*cking shreds while dry-humping your dignity with their crazy-weird shark dicks. Sure, Santiago tries killing a few of them, but drops his harpoon because his hands are just as old as he is. By nighttime, the sharks have pretty much eaten the entire marlin. Only a bleach-white skeleton remains, silently mocking him in the murky darkness. Santiago realizes he’s still unlucky. REALLY unlucky. (Duh!) He calls the sharks “dream killers”. Which isn’t really all that fair. I mean, the sharks were just doing their job and the marlin… Jesus, don’t even get me started on the marlin! It was just hanging out one day, minding it’s own business, maybe thinking about ways it could be a better provider for it’s family and WHAM! Harpoon in the brain. Who’s the “dream killer” now, f*ckface? The hypocrisy is pretty much boundless at this point. Eventually Santiago makes it ashore. Leaving the bones of the marlin and the boat, he hobbles to his shack. He makes it home and crashes, like I said – he’s super tired. The next morning a group of fishermen gather around Santiago’s boat. One measures the skeleton and, holy shit-shingles! It’s over 18 feet! The head of the fish is given to Pedrico (strange that this is the first mention of him) and the other fishermen ask Manolin to send their glad tidings to the old man. Manolin brings Santiago newspapers and coffee when he wakes and they decide to fish together again. Many years later, there’s a Red Lobster Restaurant in nearly every city in America, offering a casual dining experience and convenient parking.

Thus the origin of the phrase "Jumping the shark". Amen.

 

[threesixpio]

So you're quite happy for Burton to start the season running around at Box Hill?

Maybe that's a good sign though. Pretty hard to fit everyone in

 

[HeHateMe]

Lost of spots up for grabs, Stewart has impressed me in jlc.

Maybe stewart can play CHB Mr Lizard?

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[Mr Lizard]

Lost of spots up for grabs, Stewart has impressed me in jlc.

Maybe stewart can play CHB Mr Lizard?

I think Frawley and Brand are the key defenders, Stratton the other guy who gets 'a job'.

Stewart will be there somewhere, though.

 

[HeHateMe]

I think Frawley and Brand are the key defenders, Stratton the other guy who gets 'a job'.

Stewart will be there somewhere, though.

Well your opinon > mine. You have made that much clear. So ill take your word.

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[Mr Lizard]

Well your opinon > mine. You have made that much clear. So ill take your word.

Don't get all bent out of shape.

It's up to you to make yourself clear bro, not me. They're your words.

 

[buddy2fernando]

Interesting to see nobody even has Henderson on their emergencies.... Missed last JLT due to having his baby born but expect to see him feature quite a bit this season.

 

[Argy]

Interesting to see nobody even has Henderson on their emergencies.... Missed last JLT due to having his baby born but expect to see him feature quite a bit this season.

He's a "forgotten man". But it's understandable as he hasn't played yet.

 

[HeHateMe]

Don't get all bent out of shape.

It's up to you to make yourself clear bro, not me. They're your words.

Not bent out of shape but i did say i like a small backline. So i was crystal clear.

Also mentioned the team has the ability to rotate to cover holes.

Was it necessary for 5 posters to try and muzzle me? Probably not.

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[Mr Lizard]

Was it necessary for 5 posters to try and muzzle me? Probably not.

Who was trying to muzzle you? Harden up princess.

You could've explained your idea in the post you listed your team in. "I've named Hodge as CHB but really the only key defender is Frawley. I don't rate any of the '2nd string' forwards in the league, the lumbering 5'11" types, so I think we'll get away with a combination of Gibson/Hodge/Stratton/Birchall on them." or something similar.

Then, it wouldn't have taken us further enquiries to determine you are watching a different game to most others.

But don't let me tell you; you do you, boo.

 

[HeHateMe]

Who was trying to muzzle you? Harden up princess.

Well we have this.


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[Mr Lizard]

Well we have this.

We do. Would sir like a tissue to dab away the moistness around his eyes?

You listed your team, you got some response on it. Play on!

 

[HeHateMe]

We do. Would sir like a tissue to dab away the moistness around his eyes?

You listed your team, you got some response on it. Play on!

Exactly, i named a team got some resonse to explain. i did.

Then got comments like "what game you watching", "yawn" etc...

I dont mind tho, so i joined in on the joke. You havent taken it well. Why?

 

[Mr Lizard]

You havent taken it well.

You're right. I've literally been shaking my fist in anger.



Stratton Brand Duryea
Gibson Frawley Birchall
Smith Mitchell Sicily
(McEvoy O'Meara Shiels)
Roughead Schoe Rioli
Vickery Gunston Breust

Hodge Burgoyne Puopolo Whitecross

Stewart Burton Henderson Miles Hartung

Hard team to pick, whichever way I go I'm thinking it isn't right. Perhaps too tall, out Schoe in Stewart.

Burton an emergency?! Sheesh. I've probably forgotten someone too...
edit: yep Langford O'Rourke Howe; damn, picking a best 22 will be easier once the team for round one is named. Malkovich.

 

[HeHateMe]

You're right. I've literally been shaking my fist in anger.

View attachment 343826

Stratton Brand Duryea
Gibson Frawley Birchall
Smith Mitchell Sicily
(McEvoy O'Meara Shiels)
Roughead Schoe Rioli
Vickery Gunston Breust

Hodge Burgoyne Puopolo Whitecross

Stewart Burton Henderson Miles Hartung

Hard team to pick, whichever way I go I'm thinking it isn't right. Perhaps too tall, out Schoe in Stewart.

Burton an emergency?! Sheesh. I've probably forgotten someone too...

i kid i kid hehe .
Looks like you have come across similar issues i had making a line up:

I wanted Stewart IN & and have Sicily an option for HB. So didnt have space for my boy Burton. Then i wanted to have Shoey up FWD to start so Gunston and Rough could play mid. But thought the team looked top heavy.

Light Bulb momment, go small in defense and have swing men so the team can adjust needed.

*was just mucking around with an idea to go 3 HB and 1 KPD. With the option to throw Gibson/Schoy/Sicily on a tall if it starts to go south. As you said i should of explaned it.

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[MrPremiership]

You're right. I've literally been shaking my fist in anger.

View attachment 343826

Stratton Brand Duryea
Gibson Frawley Birchall
Smith Mitchell Sicily
(McEvoy O'Meara Shiels)
Roughead Schoe Rioli
Vickery Gunston Breust

Hodge Burgoyne Puopolo Whitecross

Stewart Burton Henderson Miles Hartung

Hard team to pick, whichever way I go I'm thinking it isn't right. Perhaps too tall, out Schoe in Stewart.

Burton an emergency?! Sheesh. I've probably forgotten someone too...
edit: yep Langford O'Rourke Howe; damn, picking a best 22 will be easier once the team for round one is named. Malkovich.

Sicily on a wing? Not sure about him there, or even in best 22 to be honest. Probably replace him with Schoe in the forward line, and then get Hartung on the wing

 

[Mr Lizard]

Sicily on a wing? Not sure about him there, or even in best 22 to be honest. Probably replace him with Schoe in the forward line, and then get Hartung on the wing

I had Hendo on the wing originally, then realised I'd left Sicily out. As I said, every version of my side feels wrong. I'll be more confident naming a side once Clarko names his...

I forgot Lovell too, damn!

 

[Argy]

every version of my side feels wrong.

Likewise. Too many forwards and too few tried and tested defenders for my liking.

 

[illnino]

I like doing this... I'm gonna have another crack for the fun of it.

FB - Stratton Frawley Burgoyne
HB - Sicily Gibson Henderson
Ce - Gunston O'Meara Smith
HF - Breust Roughead Rioli
FF - Puopolo Vickery Stewart
RR - McEvoy Mitchell Shiels
Int - Birchall Miles Schoenmakers Whitecross

Emg - Langford Burton Duryea

 

[threesixpio]

I like doing this... I'm gonna have another crack for the fun of it.

FB - Stratton Frawley Burgoyne
HB - Sicily Gibson Henderson
Ce - Gunston O'Meara Smith
HF - Breust Roughead Rioli
FF - Puopolo Vickery Stewart
RR - McEvoy Mitchell Shiels
Int - Birchall Miles Schoenmakers Whitecross

Emg - Langford Burton Duryea

That's kind of cool but you'll be hated forever for having number 5 on the bench

(Henderson at HB....nice)

 

[illnino]

That's kind of cool but you'll be hated forever for having number 5 on the bench

(Henderson at HB....nice)

No.5 could replace Miles, Whitey or Schoey... it's hard to pick the last few players lately. As for Hendo, he mentioned recently in an article that he's looking forward to playing with our back 6 and on the wing.

 

[threesixpio]

No.5 could replace Miles, Whitey or Schoey... it's hard to pick the last few players lately. As for Hendo, he mentioned recently in an article that he's looking forward to playing with our back 6 and on the wing.

Noice

 

[Collins-Langford-Ayres]

I had Hendo on the wing originally, then realised I'd left Sicily out. As I said, every version of my side feels wrong. I'll be more confident naming a side once Clarko names his...

I forgot Lovell too, damn!

Lovell hasn't done enough in the JLT to be in the top 22. Along with the injured JOR and Howe.

For mine, at this stage, guys like Brand, Miles, Sicily, Burton, Stewart, Duryea, Hartung, Langford and Schoey are fighting for the last five spots.

 

[Gralin]

Lovell hasn't done enough in the JLT to be in the top 22. Along with the injured JOR and Howe.

For mine, at this stage, guys like Brand, Miles, Sicily, Burton, Stewart, Duryea, Hartung, Langford and Schoey are fighting for the last five spots.

O'Rourke and Howe played today for box hill, brand didn't so he's behind them as far as match fitness

 

[OzJohnnie]

I hadn't read this thread in a while and missed all the fireworks. Dang. It was fight night and I didn't have a seat.