Orange crush
Norm Smith Medallist
- Aug 12, 2017
- 5,209
- 9,681
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Vintage Bay Mofra's Bottom 50 for 2023
- Thread starter Mofra
- Start date
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philreich
Premium Platinum
- Mar 2, 2014
- 64,380
- 166,424
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- Port Adelaide
Speaking of Trump, it's not widely known that Hillary Clinton rang the White House one night during his stint as president. She exclaims, "I need to talk to the president - it's an emergency."Lifetime achievement award: Jake Stringer
Pictured: Looking like a suburban cricketer who lost a bet
Likes: Students
Hates: School
Jake Stringer peaked at 21 and has been chasing that "student high" ever since.
Nicknamed "The Package" by Brian Taylor, presumably for the same reason Damien Barrett is nick-named "The Purple Headed-Warrior", Stringer famously won AA selection in 2015, was carried to a flag in 2016, and after a 2017 of poor performance on and off the field he was sent packing to a club where his low, low standards would be tolerated... nay, embraced.
Threatening to 'breakout' each year since, Jake is the AFL equivalent of half a lap-dance: you get a little tease and ultimately end up disappointed.
Each 'non-contract' year Jake would rock up to the Hangar looking like he had a busy Christmas delivering presents to school children and then struggle to run games out and, more recently, suffer injury due to not looking after himself. A mid-sized forward with grand designs to become a midfielder, he had two good games in 2023 (both predominantly as a forward) then spent the rest of the year doing his best impersonation of Gary Rohan during finals inside of Mitch McGovern's 2021 body. All up he finished with under 18 games, no September action (again) and in his last game was subbed off as part of a 126 thrashing by the Giants.
Apart from not preparing himself for the AFL lifestyle with the exception of getting absolutely shithouse tattoos, Jake famously 'likes them a little young' (to quote Trump about his good friend, Jeffery Epstein). At Essendon he wears number 25 in a nod to his hero, Leonardo di Caprio. He also likes the NBA, particularly Josh Giddey.
Fun fact: Jake's birthday is Anzac Day, just like Hank Azaria, Al Pacino and Ella Fitzgerald. His favourite food is "lots" and dislikes running, dieting and people who walk on escalators.
As this season is a contract year Jake may actually perform a little bit. Kudos on a lifetime of underachievement and welcome to the Bottom 50 lifetime achievement honour board.
After some cajoling, the president's assistant agrees to wake him up. The conversation goes like this:
Trump: So what's so important that it can't wait until morning?
Clinton: A Supreme Court judge just died, and I want to take his place.
Trump: Well it's OK with me if it's OK with the mortician.
Even a broken clock is right twice a day… so Grohan is half as good as a broken clock
- Aug 18, 2018
- 32,301
- 55,016
- AFL Club
- Geelong
I'll take once a career if that's the result
Your wish is already true
No surprise that a supporter of a club that thinks making the 8 is the ultimate goal would say that
Jack Ginnivan come on down!
- Sep 3, 2019
- 22,618
- 65,391
- AFL Club
- Collingwood
- Sep 3, 2019
- 22,618
- 65,391
- AFL Club
- Collingwood
Kill 2 birds with one coach?
Lifetime achievement award: Jake Stringer
Pictured: Looking like a suburban cricketer who lost a bet
Likes: Students
Hates: School
Jake Stringer peaked at 21 and has been chasing that "student high" ever since.
Nicknamed "The Package" by Brian Taylor, presumably for the same reason Damien Barrett is nick-named "The Purple Headed-Warrior", Stringer famously won AA selection in 2015, was carried to a flag in 2016, and after a 2017 of poor performance on and off the field he was sent packing to a club where his low, low standards would be tolerated... nay, embraced.
Threatening to 'breakout' each year since, Jake is the AFL equivalent of half a lap-dance: you get a little tease and ultimately end up disappointed.
Each 'non-contract' year Jake would rock up to the Hangar looking like he had a busy Christmas delivering presents to school children and then struggle to run games out and, more recently, suffer injury due to not looking after himself. A mid-sized forward with grand designs to become a midfielder, he had two good games in 2023 (both predominantly as a forward) then spent the rest of the year doing his best impersonation of Gary Rohan during finals inside of Mitch McGovern's 2021 body. All up he finished with under 18 games, no September action (again) and in his last game was subbed off as part of a 126 thrashing by the Giants.
Apart from not preparing himself for the AFL lifestyle with the exception of getting absolutely shithouse tattoos, Jake famously 'likes them a little young' (to quote Trump about his good friend, Jeffery Epstein). At Essendon he wears number 25 in a nod to his hero, Leonardo di Caprio. He also likes the NBA, particularly Josh Giddey.
Fun fact: Jake's birthday is Anzac Day, just like Hank Azaria, Al Pacino and Ella Fitzgerald. His favourite food is "lots" and dislikes running, dieting and people who walk on escalators.
As this season is a contract year Jake may actually perform a little bit. Kudos on a lifetime of underachievement and welcome to the Bottom 50 lifetime achievement honour board.
"...was carried to a flag in 2016"
- Sep 3, 2019
- 22,618
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- Oct 16, 2011
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Seriously what a time it was back then, Groenewegen doing "captains announcements" and people showing off party tricks with primates, the 80s were like the wild west.
Grand Uncle Horace
Shake down the thunder
People are clamouring for H McMissy, JSOS - “get thee to a breeding barn” as Shakespeare should’ve written and the classy Ginnipig BUT is there another lol Norfer?
Grand Uncle Horace
Shake down the thunder
Should add Ginnipig’s 4 year contract gives him a shot at a bottom 50 lifetime achievement award.
philreich
Premium Platinum
- Mar 2, 2014
- 64,380
- 166,424
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Braklet
🐍 OOB 🏆🥄🏆🐍
- Aug 7, 2021
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- Duke Blue Devils, L.A. Lakers
The little rascals were in class and Miss Crabtree was giving them a vocabulary lesson.
She asks, "Alfalfa, use the word love in a sentence."
Alfalfa replies, "I love Darla." <winks at Darla who rolls her eyes in disgust>
Miss Crabtree responds "Good... now Spanky your word is respect."
Spanky replies, "I respect the way Alfalfa loves Darla."
Crabtree says "Very good! Now Buckweat it's your turn, your word is Dictate."
Buckweat replies, "Hey Darla... how do my dictate last night?"
philreich
Premium Platinum
- Mar 2, 2014
- 64,380
- 166,424
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- Port Adelaide
Would prefer him dead myself to be honest
- Sep 3, 2019
- 22,618
- 65,391
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- Collingwood
Would rather listen to Gina Rinehart fart through a walkie talkie
Orange crush
Norm Smith Medallist
- Aug 12, 2017
- 5,209
- 9,681
- AFL Club
- GWS
Not all it was cracked up to be …. The reverb
Elmer_Hauser
Future Member of Parliament
He is bit of a campaigner but that's going a bit far don't you think?
- Aug 18, 2018
- 32,301
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Beats her poetry
serious lack of Wet Toast players, considering the spudness they served up week to week.
Every so often I spot someone, or a venue name will come up, and a partial memory flits through the brain and a stupid grin paints my face. Have not thought about that for years. F*** me, they were great days. And the late '70's were not so bad either.
- Oct 25, 2001
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