Society & Culture The Bigfooty Guide to Getting the Woman of Your Desire (Part 5)

[Vecto]

If you want to get a girl. do what JD does at the start of the vid.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4iPXRdC-_A

Instant winner (not even joking)

 

[Zarrix]

You doing comm and/or econs at UWA?

Nah man :/

 

[thebirdman 24]

Okay, i've been reading this thread for so long but never had an excuse to post but the events of the last months have given me a reason to.

So, i just got out of a 2 and a half year relationship, yeah boo hoo. Anyway during about a year of this time this other girl had always been flirting with me, posting on my facebook wall tagging me, etc, which shitted my girlfriend to no end. When we break up, she says the only thing she didnt want me to do was go near her friends and this one girl. Well naturally i see that girl out in town that night, didn't close, but should of. We get along so well its ridiculous, and we planned to see a movie sometime.

So a week or so later we see this movie and have a real good time, then a week or so later she came to pre drinks and town and we hook up alot and have a lot of fun. I don't think i got along with my ex this way and we had a pretty good thing for a while

The downside is this new girl is a bit of a flirt, but her friends tell me she's really into me. Also i'm not sure if shes looking for a boyfriend situation, but i like a challenge.

Now my question consists of two elements
a) should i seriously pursue this girl so close out of a relationship (5 weeks), or should i keep it casual/friends/whatever and
b) should i really consider my ex's plea and stop hooking up with her/seeing her

Cheers

 

[premiers06]

Okay, i've been reading this thread for so long but never had an excuse to post but the events of the last months have given me a reason to.

So, i just got out of a 2 and a half year relationship, yeah boo hoo. Anyway during about a year of this time this other girl had always been flirting with me, posting on my facebook wall tagging me, etc, which shitted my girlfriend to no end. When we break up, she says the only thing she didnt want me to do was go near her friends and this one girl. Well naturally i see that girl out in town that night, didn't close, but should of. We get along so well its ridiculous, and we planned to see a movie sometime.

So a week or so later we see this movie and have a real good time, then a week or so later she came to pre drinks and town and we hook up alot and have a lot of fun. I don't think i got along with my ex this way and we had a pretty good thing for a while

The downside is this new girl is a bit of a flirt, but her friends tell me she's really into me. Also i'm not sure if shes looking for a boyfriend situation, but i like a challenge.

Now my question consists of two elements
a) should i seriously pursue this girl so close out of a relationship (5 weeks), or should i keep it casual/friends/whatever and
b) should i really consider my ex's plea and stop hooking up with her/seeing her

Cheers

5 weeks is plenty of time, go for the girl. No point waiting the opportunity wont be their forever.

Don't let your ex call the shots, you're single you call the shots

 

[Caesar]

Personally I think her request is a little unreasonable. It would be a bit rough for you to go after her friends, but if this is just some girl who she has very little to do with then its not really any of her business.

That said, reason isn't really a factor. Regardless of how 'fair' or 'unfair' it was for your ex to place her off limits, she will be pissed and her friends will take her side. If you go there, be prepared to be the bad guy in that friendship group. Some of them will probably assume you cheated.

 

[The Goon]

Personally I think her request is a little unreasonable. It would be a bit rough for you to go after her friends, but if this is just some girl who she has very little to do with then its not really any of her business.

That said, reason isn't really a factor. Regardless of how 'fair' or 'unfair' it was for your ex to place her off limits, she will be pissed and her friends will take her side. If you go there, be prepared to be the bad guy in that friendship group. Some of them will probably assume you cheated.

He's probably the 'bad guy' to a limited extent already. I'm guessing you did the breaking up?

Quite frankly, you're broken up. She has no right whatsoever to try to determine who you can and can't go out with. What on earth would make her think she did?

 

[Caesar]

Quite frankly, you're broken up. She has no right whatsoever to try to determine who you can and can't go out with. What on earth would make her think she did?

Basically agree, I do think that a bit of sensitivity is merited though. I really wouldn't want one of my serious exes moving on to one of my close mates - and although I'd put the responsibility on them to stay away from her, I definitely wouldn't appreciate her going after them. So out of respect I stay away from my exes' friends.

I'd be interested in knowing what he told his ex when she asked him to stay away from this girl. Ex or not, I wouldn't like to be in the position where I'm going back on my word.

 

[WALL-e]

What's this 'erms of the break-up' stuff?

"OK I'm breaking up with you, but you can't put your penor in the following...."

 

[kfc1]

Onus is definitely on your mates to steer clear of preying exes, once broken up there's really no obligations

 

[Gram2Lovett]

There should be no terms of a break up.

Once you've broken up, she has no hold on you. Do whatever the ****, or whoever for that matter, you want.

 

[thebirdman 24]

He's probably the 'bad guy' to a limited extent already. I'm guessing you did the breaking up?

Quite frankly, you're broken up. She has no right whatsoever to try to determine who you can and can't go out with. What on earth would make her think she did?

Not exactly, i had wanted to break up for a while but she actually initiated and i went along with it. It did start of as just a break with the intention of getting back together but a few things have happened and i doubt that we will get back together, possibly why she has invented this rule.

This new girl was in the year above her at school but they didn't know each other. I thought it was quite an unreasonable request.

 

[King Elvis]

If you have no hope of getting back together, for whatever reason, then pursue it.

Don't be a prick about it, and try to be sensitive about it, but you'd be stupid not to; your ex is your ex.

 

[The Goon]

Not exactly, i had wanted to break up for a while but she actually initiated and i went along with it. It did start of as just a break with the intention of getting back together but a few things have happened and i doubt that we will get back together, possibly why she has invented this rule.

This new girl was in the year above her at school but they didn't know each other. I thought it was quite an unreasonable request.

As Ceaser said, it's reasonable for her to not want you to see one of her friends (awkwardness etc) but generally it's up to them to tow the line on that, not you. The only complications to that would be if you have remained friends and socialize in the same group - and then it's still more complicated than just acquiescing to her wishes.

As far as the other girl goes - she has no right to ask it. Feel free to ignore her request, no one will think the less of you for it.

 

[thebirdman 24]

Cheers lads, good advice all round

 

[thebirdman 24]

update:

caught up with the ex yesterday, she questioned me for literally half an hour about whether i'd been with this new girl. i gave in and told her. she claims shes doesn't care one bit or anything but you could tell she was upset. she goes on to say that if i keep doing it we have no future chance of getting back together. i think i can live with that. especially the way the ex has turned into miss socialite thinking shes friends with club owners and djs, which made me feel a bit sorry for her that she can only make guy friends when drunk. doesn't seem to have anything going on outside of town.

full steam ahead with new girl

 

[deled3]

"OK I'm breaking up with you, but you can't put your penor in the following...."

Good post

 

[kfc1]

she goes on to say that if i keep doing it we have no future chance of getting back together.

bishes love to do this, break up with you then have a whinge when you move on. if she really wanted you she wouldnt have broekn up with you in the first place...

 

[MarcusP2]

Sucks being a business student in that regard, across my four units this semester, there are probably three chicks that even register on my radar. None higher than a 7/10 looks wise, and none that I would go gangbusters for.

Try doing engineering mate.

 

[Xtreme]

Scored a phone number last night , treating it like the holy grail at this point as its a rarity for me on several fronts - usually too low on confidence + if i happen to strike it lucky, because of today's technology they'll give me an e-mail to contact them rather than a number.... i prefer phone contact rather than sending e-mails back and forth.

The "pep talk" i had with a close female friend did wonders for myself esteem, i had crawled further into my "shell" in recent times and hadn't been myself. Granted i am usually a low key person, but i've just been a shadow.

 

[frantelle]

Scored a phone number last night , treating it like the holy grail at this point as its a rarity for me on several fronts - usually too low on confidence + if i happen to strike it lucky, because of today's technology they'll give me an e-mail to contact them rather than a number.... i prefer phone contact rather than sending e-mails back and forth.

The "pep talk" i had with a close female friend did wonders for myself esteem, i had crawled further into my "shell" in recent times and hadn't been myself. Granted i am usually a low key person, but i've just been a shadow.

Emails? Really?

 

[Caesar]

Emails? Really?

That's nothing. I used to work with a guy who gives his business card to girls he meets in bars.

 

[Xtreme]

Emails? Really?

I've also had a few telling me to find them on facebook , i stay well away from those girls...........

 

[Kyptastic]

Try doing engineering mate.

Luckily it's the opposite in Arts/Education...not that it helped me much.

 

[THRILLHO]

Luckily it's the opposite in Arts/Education...not that it helped me much.

The first two months before census date is simply amazing in Arts. Then the well dries a little bit, but still far better than the sausage-fest known as Engineering.

 

[checkraiseulite]

That's nothing. I used to work with a guy who gives his business card to girls he meets in bars.

[YOUTUBE]qoIvd3zzu4Y[/YOUTUBE]

I hope they were nice cards at least!