Media The Vampires: A Smiles retrospective

[Restricted Free Agent]

On the 8th of April, 2020 a notification popped up in the top right corner of my screen.

Pictured: The PM in question

A PM from Millky95, or as I’d known him until then, Parxboy. I’d had absolutely nothing to do with The Milk Man prior to this PM and had limited knowledge of his time in the league, knowing simply it involved Ant Bear and some backstabbing. The PM contained a simple proposal; to join him in an attempt to enter a new expansion team into the league. This was my first introduction to the Pennsylvania Vampires.

Pictured: magpienato 's logo which was used in the bid

Since then, 3 years have flown by and a lot has happened in that time (including a visit to Pennsylvania, where I didn’t see any vampires ). Which got me thinking, what if? What if the team in purple, red, and black managed to get up? In this retrospective I’ll be looking over at the proposal and the list profile and comparing it to others in the leagues. So get yourself some garlic, open up the curtains, and have a stake at the ready, cause it’s time to meet the Vampires!

Pictured: Dingster flashes the pearly whites on the inaugural photo day

This thread will go over the following:
The team's initial proposal
The reaction to that proposal
Would it have mattered?
An analysis of the build up of the list and how they've faired in the seasons since
A poster by poster analysis of the list
Final thoughts​

 

[Millky95]

Pictured: The PM in question

Clear your watched threads, you animal

 

[Restricted Free Agent]

The identity: What were the Vampires about?

If you’re new to the league, or simply forgetful, you may be scratching your head as to who or what a Pennsylvania Vampire is. Don’t fret! I’m here to give you a super quick run down!

In season 29, Millky95 alongside myself, Chipmunk and Dingster fronted the bid to enter a 13th team into the league for season 30. The following details were presented by Millky in his media thread formally announcing the team



Name: Pennsylvania Vampies
Colours: Black, Red, Purple and White
Homeground: The Coffin, located in the Graveyard District of Ashcombe (formally Dark Park)

Spoiler: Home Jersey

Spoiler: Away Jersey

 

[por_please_ya]

On the 8th of April, 2020 a notification popped up in the top right corner of my screen.
View attachment 1682765
Pictured: The PM in question

A PM from Millky95, or as I’d known him until then, Parxboy. I’d had absolutely nothing to do with The Milk Man prior to this PM and had limited knowledge of his time in the league, knowing simply it involved Ant Bear and some backstabbing. The PM contained a simple proposal; to join him in an attempt to enter a new expansion team into the league. This was my first introduction to the Pennsylvania Vampires.

Pictured: magpienato 's logo which was used in the bid

Since then, 3 years have flown by and a lot has happened in that time (including a visit to Pennsylvania, where I didn’t see any vampire ). Which got me thinking, what if? What if the team in purple, red, and black managed to get up? In this retrospective I’ll be looking over at the proposal and the list profile and comparing it to others in the leagues. So get yourself some garlic, open up the curtains, and have a stake at the ready, cause it’s time to meet the Vampires!

Pictured: Dingster flashes the pearly whites on the inaugural photo day

This thread will go over the following:
The team's initial proposal
The reaction to that proposal
Would it have mattered?
An analysis of the build up of the list and how they've faired in the seasons since
A poster by poster analysis of the list
Final thoughts​

I'm a little triggered by this cough*nearlylostChipmunk*cough, but intrigued all the same. Carry on!

 

[por_please_ya]

Clear your watched threads, you animal

 

[Millky95]

View attachment 1682767

How do you people function in everyday life?

 

[Kennedy Parker]

Let's bring them back. The league needs controversy.

 

[The Filth Wizard]

View attachment 1682767

I'm at 250.

 

[Restricted Free Agent]

The initial reaction

The following are posters' initial reactions to the bid
​

Jokes aside what's the real name?

I bet this team sucks.

A twilight themed SFA team?

Leagues jumped the shark.

Wow. That name is next level terrible.

Ant Bear

If you approve this. Just know you're letting the league down. The 'committee' might even ask you to step down.

For everyone bagging the name I agree, it sucks a bag of nuts just remember we still have the Gumbies

Pictured: Millky95 reacting to the feedback

So, the bid wasn’t received particularly well to say the least. The main sticking point initially was the name. No-one liked the name Pennsylvania Vampires.

Pictured: The LG in a crisis meeting

While a few posters weren’t fans of the Vampires aspect, the real sticking point was the location. People really weren’t a fan of the Americanisation of the Sweet FA. There were proposals to change the location to a fictional place, to a place where a Vampire may actually reside such as Transylvania, cause we all know that seeing a Vampire in Pennsylvania would be about as rare as seeing a Bear in Las Vegas and we need realism in the Sweet FA.

The following were some of the proposed alterations to the name, with varying degrees of seriousness

The Pennsylvania Phantoms
The Coffin Bay Vampires
JT's Jets
The Fremantle Dockers
haydo's lizards

Ultimately though, none of these concerns were ever taken seriously internally at the Vampires, and this was likely a big part of why the bid failed.

​

 

[Golumless]

Cool thumbsup

 

[nahnah]

There is a very interesting backstory to that pm notification indeed

 

[nahnah]

I’ve disabled that watched function due to ocd

 

[nahnah]

The Fremantle Dockers


​

This team is already in the league, the royals are playing against them this week

 

[Cadsky]

Clear your watched threads, you animal

Hi millky

 

[Cadsky]

This team is already in the league, the royals are playing against them this week

Just need Millky95

 

[DenieD]

Team Edward FTW

 

[PhenomenalV1]

It's Beez season, isn't it?

 

[nahnah]

beez are you in season?

 

[Restricted Free Agent]

Would it actually have mattered?

In my opinion, probably not. Dodgy names have always and will always be a part of the Sweet FA. As recently as S32, the Hawks rebranded to the Phoenix, a decision which had about as much logic as naming a team the Pennsylvanian Vampires. Yet at the end of the day, it didn’t drastically affect the league. For a few seasons, cheap banter points could be scored by bagging the name, but the league didn’t implode over an average name.

Pictured: An artist's rendition of Millky95 doing some reflection on a new name a few season down the line.

Historically too, teams’ initial names haven’t been final, the Bandits became the Bombers, The Southern Dragons became the Dragons FFC, the Gumbies became the Direwolves and then reverted back to the Gumbies. Ultimately, names and identities can change. ​

 

[Cadsky]

Bring back the Vampires!!!!

 

[Millky95]

Hi millky
View attachment 1682797

It's OK baby, I can save you

 

[Millky95]

Would it actually have mattered?

In my opinion, probably not. Dodgy names have always and will always be a part of the Sweet FA. As recently as S32, the Hawks rebranded to the Phoenix, a decision which had about as much logic as naming a team the Pennsylvanian Vampires. Yet at the end of the day, it didn’t drastically affect the league. For a few seasons, cheap banter points could be scored by bagging the name, but the league didn’t implode over an average name.

Pictured: An artist's rendition of Millky95 doing some reflection on a new name a few season down the line.

Historically too, teams’ initial names haven’t been final, the Bandits became the Bombers, The Southern Dragons became the Dragons FFC, the Gumbies became the Direwolves and then reverted back to the Gumbies. Ultimately, names and identities can change. ​

So funnily enough, in the discussions for the Old Boys, Mobbs pointed out something really interesting: The Vampires wasn't a good, safe name (Las Vegas Bears, Dragons FFC, Mt Buller Demons) and more importantly it wasn't a completely stupid name (Old Boys, Gumbies, Bandits for a time, Team PUMP) either. Just something worth thinking about

 

[Cadsky]

SarahSmiles, as S37 admin, I will formally grant the Vampires the SFA's 14th licence. You're just not allowed to play for them. I'm locking you up in the Royal basement.

 

[Restricted Free Agent]

SarahSmiles, as S37 admin, I will formally grant the Vampires the SFA's 14th licence. You're just not allowed to play for them. I'm locking you up in the Royal basement.

I'm not sure how to feel about this news

 

[Cadsky]

I'm not sure how to feel about this news

If you need to join an expansion team, you'll just have to wait for team 15, the Mozquitoes.