Off-topic Bay Survivor 2017 - Good Bloke Island Edition - Congratulations Richoatthedisco!

[richoatthedisco]

It's not even the same back beat D\H

It's shit, Benny.

 

[Wosh]

Will this be like the song contest where Wooshette refuses to listen to any songs?

Pretty much

 

[Wosh]

I haven't read a single post yet this weekend.
I assure you all, I have taken all Monday off and I'll be reading every entry diligently.

So keep the noodz coming

 

[Kangaroos4eva]

I'm looking forward to Chappyuk's rap about Bosk.

 

[A Cut Above]

I'm looking forward to Chappyuk's rap about Bosk.

 

[iTigre]

Sounds exactly the same as Dubs', only I understood even fewer words. Is this a rap contest or a 'sound like an auto-tune computer with a stutter' contest?

It's all the same

 

[Allikat]

I decided not to honour you all with my own voice, but one you all know and love:



And I kept it short so Wooshette will actually listen

 

[Kangaroos4eva]

I decided not to honour you all with my own voice, but one you all know and love:



And I kept it short so Wooshette will actually listen

Now I need Bwuce one to make this one feel more complete.

 

[Allikat]

Now I need Bwuce one to make this one feel more complete.

Maybe next challenge

 

[craffles]

Challenge #4 entry

If anyone hasn't heard the original, I've posted it beneath my new and update

Robbo the Bloke by Craffles Franklin




I hate the new age journos
I'm a chauvinist
I live on beer and pies
Tried to tell you,
But you look at me,
Like maybe I'm Ralphy underneath
Haven't brushed me teeth.

Yesterday I lied
And cause I've got no mates
I got a real shithouse alibi
Thanks caro
I really went out drinking,
I told you I was at work
Don't ask me for analysis,
'Cause it's something I will shirk

I'm a bloke,
I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers
Shithouse journo by day,
I piss up all me pay
Watching footy on tv
Just feed me more vb
Just pour my beer,
And get my smokes,
And go away

Or take me as I am
This may mean you'll
Have to fetch another can
Rest assured,
That if I start to write good articles
I'm going to extremes
But tomorrow I'll get shitfaced,
And today won't mean a thing

I'm a bloke
I'm a yobbo,
And me nickname now is Robbo
Winfield is me cigarrete
I dress in flanellette
Shearer's singlet that is blue
Throw in a few tattoos,
You know you wouldn't
Want me any other way

When you think
You've got me figured out
The season's already changing

I think it's cool
When I act like a tool
And my mates try to shave me

I'm a bloke,
I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers
Shithouse journo by day,
I piss up all me pay
Watching footy on tv
Just feed me more vb
Just pour my beer,
And get my smokes,
And go away

I'm a bloke
I'm a yobbo,
And me nickname now is Robbo
Winfield is me cigarrete
I dress in flanellette
Shearer's singlet that is blue
Throw in a few tattoos,
You know you wouldn't
Want me any other way

 

[ChappyUK]

I'm looking forward to Chappyuk's rap about Bosk.

Need some help with words that rhyme with campaigner.

 

[William Wonka]

Challenge #4 Entry

ORIGINAL FLOGSTER
By M.C Big Willy

Yo yo yo- This goes out to all the brothers n sisters who are doing time just for harmless ****ing lulz. Gray day, Wiggo, Hoooooops, DVB, RUS, and all my boyz suffering discrimination and persercution just because they got an apostrophe or two in their username- y'all know who you are!
This ones for you...
------------------------


Cruisin thru the bay n every thread is shit.
So I head to the Main board to troll a bit.

But those Mainboard flogs they be making me sick.
So I haul my ass back to bay13 quick.

Then I get a message sayin 'Boy, you cant perform that action'.
Damn! I musta got another muthafukin infraction.

Got me a message from a bitchazz Mod
They wanna ban my ass like Im in da sqwad.

I say "Man, don't suspend me" but to my appeals theys deaf.
Cause instead of spellin Norf with a TH, well... I used an F.
-

Back from suspension actin like I dont care.
But still I stick to my teamboard, least I be safe there.

Like a fool though I musta criticized a player.
Or like a bigger fool had an argument with Bayer.

I dont even know what the **** I said.
Cause now my post is deleted and my names in red.

Got a message from Admin sayin "Think ya clever?"
"Well you're permabanned now and that means forever!"
-

So Im back with a benny and I dont give a ****.
Gunna spam like crazy n post like a shittruck.
C'mon! Ban me again campaigners I aint got shit to lose.



Ill just join Aussiefootyforums and talk farts with Sooz.

 

[richoatthedisco]

Brilliant, Wil.

 

[A Cut Above]

Challenge #4 entry

If anyone hasn't heard the original, I've posted it beneath my new and update

Robbo the Bloke by Craffles Franklin

View attachment 440532


I hate the new age journos
I'm a chauvinist
I live on beer and pies
Tried to tell you,
But you look at me,
Like maybe I'm Ralphy underneath
Haven't brushed me teeth.

Yesterday I lied
And cause I've got no mates
I got a real shithouse alibi
Thanks caro
I really went out drinking,
I told you I was at work
Don't ask me for analysis,
'Cause it's something I will shirk

I'm a bloke,
I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers
Shithouse journo by day,
I piss up all me pay
Watching footy on tv
Just feed me more vb
Just pour my beer,
And get my smokes,
And go away

Or take me as I am
This may mean you'll
Have to fetch another can
Rest assured,
That if I start to write good articles
I'm going to extremes
But tomorrow I'll get shitfaced,
And today won't mean a thing

I'm a bloke
I'm a yobbo,
And me nickname now is Robbo
Winfield is me cigarrete
I dress in flanellette
Shearer's singlet that is blue
Throw in a few tattoos,
You know you wouldn't
Want me any other way

When you think
You've got me figured out
The season's already changing

I think it's cool
When I act like a tool
And my mates try to shave me

I'm a bloke,
I'm an ocker
And I really love your knockers
Shithouse journo by day,
I piss up all me pay
Watching footy on tv
Just feed me more vb
Just pour my beer,
And get my smokes,
And go away

I'm a bloke
I'm a yobbo,
And me nickname now is Robbo
Winfield is me cigarrete
I dress in flanellette
Shearer's singlet that is blue
Throw in a few tattoos,
You know you wouldn't
Want me any other way

Its... its beautiful.

Challenge #4 Entry

ORIGINAL FLOGSTER
By M.C Big Willy

Yo yo yo- This goes out to all the brothers n sisters who are doing time just for harmless ******* lulz. Gray day, Wiggo, Hoooooops, DVB, RUS, and all my boyz suffering discrimination and persercution just because they got an apostrophe or two in their username- y'all know who you are!
This ones for you...
------------------------


Cruisin thru the bay n every thread is shit.
So I head to the Main board to troll a bit.

But those Mainboard flogs they be making me sick.
So I haul my ass back to bay13 quick.

Then I get a message sayin 'Boy, you cant perform that action'.
Damn! I musta got another muthafukin infraction.

Got me a message from a bitchazz Mod
They wanna ban my ass like Im in da sqwad.

I say "Man, don't suspend me" but to my appeals theys deaf.
Cause instead of spellin Norf with a TH, well... I used an F.
-

Back from suspension actin like I dont care.
But still I stick to my teamboard, least I be safe there.

Like a fool though I musta criticized a player.
Or like a bigger fool had an argument with Bayer.

I dont even know what the **** I said.
Cause now my post is deleted and my names in red.

Got a message from Admin sayin "Think ya clever?"
"Well you're permabanned now and that means forever!"
-

So Im back with a benny and I dont give a ****.
Gunna spam like crazy n post like a shittruck.
C'mon! Ban me again campaigners I aint got shit to lose.



Ill just join Aussiefootyforums and talk farts with Sooz.

 

[ChappyUK]

Challenge #4 entry

Campaigners and Hoes. Campaigners and Hoes.
**** all dem campaigners. **** all dem hoes.
Campaigners be takin' me dough.
Campaigners be takin' me blow.
Campaigners be takin' me hoes.
**** all dem campaigners. **** all dem hoes.

Rap can GAGF

WORD!

 

[El Dubya]

Challenge #4 entry

Campaigners and Hoes. Campaigners and Hoes.
**** all dem campaigners. **** all dem hoes.
Campaigners be takin' me dough.
Campaigners be takin' me blow.
Campaigners be takin' me hoes.
**** all dem campaigners. **** all dem hoes.

Rap can GAGF

WORD!

I know who I'd be voting out of Team Souf after this pathetic effort.

 

[Floyd]

Challenge #4 Entry


Three challenges down and I’ve won the lot
Richo is so mad I think he’s lost the plot
He said Floyd ain’t following the rules so I’m gonna snitch
I tell him that he sounds just like a whiny bitch
If you ain’t won a challenge I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but #impunity ain’t one

El Dubya slinks in and gives Richo’s arse a little lick
He says my bro is right, that Floyd is kissed on the dick
I say don’t be mad El Dub just cos you lost the vote
Now open wide and feast upon my hairy scrote
You ain’t won nothing either, I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but #impunity ain’t one

William Wonka is a cats fan, he joins the circle jerk
He thinks his Castle reference is clever, he gives a little smirk
It’s the vibe, its Mabo he says, don’t be unfair to Floyd
I tell him there’s no shame in being long term unemployed
If your nickname is Willy, I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but being a handbagger ain’t one

My teammates say, hey Floyd can win us this round?
Post a clever video, with special effects and sound
If you put in the effort you can give us all the win
I say sorry boys I can’t be farked, I’m mailing this one in
If you spent hours on a dodgy song I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but this round ain’t one

 

[ChappyUK]

I know who I'd be voting out of Team Souf after this pathetic effort.

If that's the way they want. I'm heading away for work tomorrow so have no time to do better.

It did Flashy in so I'd almost expect the same.

 

[El Dubya]

If that's the way they want. I'm heading away for work tomorrow so have no time to do better.

It did Flashy in so I'd almost expect the same.

Surely you can rouse everyone you got to out Bosk to your defence?

 

[ChappyUK]

Surely you can rouse everyone you got to out Bosk to your defence?

You're not on my team.

 

[richoatthedisco]

All right, all right, some nice efforts here. A bit derivative, y'all just putting your words to someone else's songs, but hey, not bad for a bunch of white bread crackers. Now sit back and enjoy a true original.

Challenge #4 Entry

With my silky smooth boots,
Straight through the goals I’ll shoot
You’re in for a surprise
If you think that it’s a fluke
Cos I’ll snap ‘em on the left,
Yeah I’ll slot ‘em on the right
Hell I’ll nail from the boundary,
And I’ll nail ‘em all night -
All day - in the sun I make hay
So take a front row seat
And watch the disco play

Cos I’m the A-C-E,
King of the MCG
Any youngster tries to tag me
Gets a lesson for free
That’s why you’re pressing repeat
And why I’m dressing so sweet
Cos 90 thousand come to see me
And I got ‘em on their feet

Yo

Defenders try to catch me
But I run ‘em all around
I’m the man who keeps his feet
When the others go to ground
A natural balance
Of strength, speed and skill
When I’m lining up for goal
I’m like a sniper on the kill
Yeah, I give the fans a thrill
When I launch into attack
Got ‘em standing on their seats
Shouting out, YELLOW AND BLACK!

Cos I’m the A-C-E,
King of the MCG
Any youngster tries to tag me
Gets a lesson for free
That’s why you’re pressing repeat
And why I’m dressing so sweet
Cos 90 thousand come to see me
And I got ‘em on their feet

Yeah I rise above the packs
And I take the big grabs
When the Sherrin hits the ground
I’m like Daicos on the snap
Yeah, just like Gary Ablett
Kicking goals is a habit
And it doesn’t even matter
Who you barrack for
You’re clapping for

Richo at the D,
MC supreme Bay 13
Any minnow wants to tag me
Gets a lesson for free
And now the lesson’s complete
Just accept your defeat
And admit that you look up to me
Like you would on the street.

 

[Lord_Flashheart]

I know who I'd be voting out of Team Souf after this pathetic effort.

Agreed, time to go Chappy.

 

[William Wonka]

If your nickname is Willy, I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but being a handbagger ain’t one

As witty and clever as you might be Floyd you are an inconsiderate chap who cares nothing for the emotional health of others.
If you only knew the hurt and pain that the cruel epithet 'Handbagger' causes to a loyal, dyed in the wool, proud wearer of the hoops like me you would never consider using it.

Take your hatespeech elsewhere please.

 

[Dinsdale]

Challenge #4 entry
Throw in a few tattoos,

 

[RedVest4]

Challenge #4 Entry

Sam’s Biggest Fan

The Hawk tears have gone cold, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all
The morning threads clog up my computer window, and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'll all be spam, but your picture on my profile
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

Dear Sam, I wrote a thread about you, but you still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager and my most favourite picture of you at the bottom

I made two threads about you back in autumn
You must not've read 'em
They probably got sent to the House of Cucks or somethin'
Sometimes I write things that are too funny for the mods to understand when I jot 'em
But anyways, **** them, what's been up, man?
How's your girlfriend?

I read about your teammate Motlop, I'm sorry
I had a friend upset too over some team who didn't want him
I know you probably hear this every day
But I'm your biggest fan
I even know about the extra curricular shit that you did with the Hawthorn clan
I got a room full of the same picture of you, man
I like the way you played in finals too, that shit was phat
Anyways, I hope you get this, man, hit me back
Just to chat, truly yours, Sam’s biggest fan

The Hawk tears have gone cold, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all
The morning threads clog up my computer window, and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'll all be spam, but your picture on my profile
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

Dear Sam, you still ain't called or wrote
I hope you have a chance
I ain't mad, I just think it's ****ed up you don't answer your biggest fan
If you didn't want to talk to me outside GMHBA Stadium
You didn't have to
But you could've signed an autograph for Chappyuk
That's my Geelong elias, man, his account is only six years old
We waited in the blisterin' Geelong cold for you
For four hours, and you just said no
That's pretty shitty, man, you're like his ****ing idol
He wants to be just like you, man, he likes you more than I do
I ain't that mad though, I just don't like being lied to
Remember when we met in Perth?
You said if I'd make a thread about you, you would read it
See, I'm just like you in a way; You carry the Cats and I carry the Bay
I can relate to what you're saying when you play
So when I have a shitty day, I put one of your games on and tug away
‘Cause I don't really got shit else
So that shit helps when I'm depressed
I even got a tattoo of your name across the chest
Sometimes I even read TazHawk15 posts to see how much his anoos bleeds
It's like adrenaline, his pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you do is real
And I respect you ‘cause you tell it
A Cut Above is jealous ‘cause I talk about you 24/7
But he don't know you like I know you, Sam, no one does
He don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up
You gotta read my thread, man
I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose, sincerely yours, Sam’s Biggest Fan
P.S. We should be together too (NTTAWWT)

The Hawk tears have gone cold, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all
The morning threads clog up my computer window, and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'll all be spam, but your picture on my profile
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

Dear Mr. I'm-Too-Good-to-Call-or-Write-My-Biggest-Fan
This'll be the last thread I write about your talented ass
It's been six months and still no word – I don't deserve it?
I know you read my last two threads
The jokes in them were perfect
So this is my thread I'm writing about you, I hope you read it
I'm in the car right now, Joel Selwood is driving, he’s doing 112 on the freeway
Hey, Sam, Luke Hodge is here too and we drank a fifth of vodka, you dare him to drive?
You could've rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late, I'm on a thousand downers now, I'm drowsy
And all I wanted was a lousy read of my thread titled Sam Memegola
I hope you know I ripped your picture off my profile
I loved you, Sam, we could've been together – think about it! (NTTAWWT)
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep
And you dream about it
And when you dream
I hope you can't sleep and you scream about it
I hope your conscience eats at you
And you can't breathe without me
See, Sam--shut up, El Dubya I'm tryin' to talk
Hey, Sam, that's El Dubya screamin' in the trunk
But I didn't make him read a Lethality thread I just tied him up, see, I ain't like you
‘Cause if he suffocates he’ll suffer more
And then he'll die too
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at Tasmania now
Oh shit, I forgot, how am I supposed to create this thread and get it out?

The Hawk tears have gone cold, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all
The morning threads clog up my computer window, and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'll all be spam, but your picture on my profile
It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

Dear, Sam’s Biggest Fan, I meant to write you sooner, but I just been busy
Here's an autograph for Chappyuk
I wrote it on a thrown out Hawthorn members cap
I'm sorry I didn't see you at GMHBA Stadium, I must've missed you
Don't think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you
If you relax a little, I'm glad I inspire you
but Sam’s Biggest Fan, why are you so mad?
Try to understand that I do want you as my biggest fan
I just don't want you to do some crazy shit; I seen this one thread on the Bay a couple weeks ago that made me sick
Luke Hodge was drunk and drove his car over a bridge
And had El Dubya in the trunk
And in the car they found a thread
But they didn't say who created it
Come to think about it, his name was... it was you, damn