Life lessons you wish you'd picked up sooner

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I feel like this can be a bit self-fulfilling. There needs to be a balance where you're not being taken advantage of and spending your day doing things for other people and teams at the expense of your core responsibilities. But for those who choose to be a "that's not my job" type, well you'd want to be pretty special at whatever is your job to compensate.

At my work, after several years of growth, the writing is on the wall that some 'tough decisions' may be made over the next 12-18 months. It's been a bit jarring how quickly people's attitudes have changed, like a sporting team that's having an awful season, so everyone starts gunning for their own stats and the next contract. And so the moaning and the casual potshots at other people and teams is at a level that I haven't seen since I've been here.

I know when I contact some people at my organisation with a request or a query (and it doesn't matter what level) there's some people who pretty much always do what they can to help (even if it's just a "I'm not really sure, maybe <<other individual or team >> might be able to help?). It's really gold to have people like that in the organisation and it does wonders for the culture.

It's not going to be my call, but if and when those tough decisions are being made, I'd be looking for the people who - when you reach out to them for assistance - you can sense that they are doing what they can to help, in favour of the people whose response (or non-response) makes you think "I'm sorry I bothered."
I'll always try and help coworkers where I can but as an example of what I'm talking about

I don't get paid for nights or weekends

the company charges me out at double the rate so they have an incentive to get me to work nights and weekends when customers are willing to pay, but I don't have an incentive to do it, and its purely their choice to not compensate me when they are asking me to work outside my normal hours

this is a multi billion dollar company, the work used to be done by people they paid OT to, but they decided to take the work off them and give it to my team after a restructure moved those other workers into a different profit center

the expectation was that my team would just start working nights and weekends because the company wanted us to, **** that
 
I'll always try and help coworkers where I can but as an example of what I'm talking about

I don't get paid for nights or weekends

the company charges me out at double the rate so they have an incentive to get me to work nights and weekends when customers are willing to pay, but I don't have an incentive to do it, and its purely their choice to not compensate me when they are asking me to work outside my normal hours

this is a multi billion dollar company, the work used to be done by people they paid OT to, but they decided to take the work off them and give it to my team after a restructure moved those other workers into a different profit center

the expectation was that my team would just start working nights and weekends because the company wanted us to, * that
Yeah that's fair enough and there is of course a line. I'm thinking more of when someone reaches out with a left-field query or even just asking for a bit of advice on how you might go about something. In my experience, a lot of people seem to want to stonewall these queries, it doesn't take much to just give someone a point in the right direction, or a quick list of things that they should probably consider for their project/task.
 

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Yeah that's fair enough and there is of course a line. I'm thinking more of when someone reaches out with a left-field query or even just asking for a bit of advice on how you might go about something. In my experience, a lot of people seem to want to stonewall these queries, it doesn't take much to just give someone a point in the right direction, or a quick list of things that they should probably consider for their project/task.
Every time we have redundancies at work people ask what they can do to not be on the list next time.
Lots of guys at my work just do whatever they are asked to do for fear of losing their jobs.
The decisions about redundancies are made by people they can't influence by doing a good job.
I do my job, I help my coworkers where I can but I sure as shit am not going above and beyond for the company.

There is no loyalty at large businesses, it's a job and they'll exploit you and throw you away when they're done so why be exploited

Some are worse than others but you just have to look at how setting boundaries at work got called quiet quitting as opposed to you know maintaining work/life balance to understand the culture
 
Have to say this.

I just wasn't in the right head space prior to 27 to do anything meaningful but I wish I picked up the following sooner.
  • Bought the shares in Amazon in 2001 that I got talked out of
  • That trades work would be in high demand. Plumbers are able to charge a shitload in regional areas due to high demand. I should have done a trade as opposed to a university degree.
  • That I could have worked hard for 5-10 years acquiring a few properties either high growth areas or peri urban land and I'd now have millions in assets.
  • Nobody gives a s**t about you except your family. If you want anything in life you have to go get it because nobody is going to hold your hand. Social media today is showing just how self centred people are. Are you OK day is the only time people give a s**t about your mental health and it's all fake.
  • I've always been a little naive but my personal situation has allowed me to learn to be very cautious and very guarded in a lot of situations. I guess you don't realize these things until you get burnt.
Look how caring everyone is in the song contest mate :)
 
Mind your own business. You can't solve other people's problems for them. I learned this when I tried to help a couple of family members way back, with 1. unemployment and 2. social issues. Neither would try any of my suggestions, or accept offers of help, yet all I kept hearing were complaints of "I don't know what to do". Yet I was the one lying awake at night worrying and getting grey hairs. One day I woke up and from then on, I wash my hands of other people's problems. If asked I'll offer suggestions but I won't argue or push and they can take it or leave it. And I don't ask anyone for advice either, unless they have specialist knowledge that I require, eg a nurse, etc.

I wouldn't make a good social worker ;)
 
But for those who choose to be a "that's not my job" type, well you'd want to be pretty special at whatever is your job to compensate.

Depends on the field of work I guess, both of my managers use any excuse in the book not to train up anyone new.

It's in my best interest to be better than my coworkers so training up or showing anyone new more than the very basic stuff is a 'That's not my job' for sure hehe!
 
A wise man once told me 'the one you knock back, is the one you miss out on'

Should have paid more attention to that as a young whipper snapper.

Tell me about it. A bit of it was not having your mates hanging shit on you for picking up a bird who wasn’t a stunner, ****ing dumb when you look back on it.
 

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Tell me about it. A bit of it was not having your mates hanging s*t on you for picking up a bird who wasn’t a stunner, ****** dumb when you look back on it.
Agree, plus a lot of the time in your late teens and early 20's, the signals are there but you don't pick up on them until later when you just want to punch yourself in the face for missing it.

There was a great awkward flirting stories thread on here that had plenty of excruciating examples
 
Agree, plus a lot of the time in your late teens and early 20's, the signals are there but you don't pick up on them until later when you just want to punch yourself in the face for missing it.

There was a great awkward flirting stories thread on here that had plenty of excruciating examples

Yep. And I've posted a few in that thread from back in the day, some I'm not quite prepared to ha ha
 
Yeah as a general rule, I would tell my younger self to "say Yes to life" a bit more often - not just with picking up but opportunities in general.
I'd be the opposite, I'd tell my younger self to slow the f*** down just occasionally.
 

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Life lessons you wish you'd picked up sooner

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