Mofra's Bottom 50 for 2021

[Saveloy Rockstar]

Don't be pissweak, it's clearly about his off-field efforts

 

[Baldur]

Billings must be a lock and there are quite a number of other Saints who deserve a position as well.

 

[Saveloy Rockstar]

Daniher firming

 

[Crabapplepittard]

Mofra you forgot to name the 49 other players.

 

[Saveloy Rockstar]

Mofra you forgot to name the 49 other players.

Essendon. The end

 

[FurTheWin]

Mofra you forgot to name the 49 other players.

Is it December already?

 

[ferrisb]

Player #50 - Scott Pendlebury
View attachment 1217038
Pictured: Scott Pendlebury during every crisis at Collingwood in the past 12 months

Wait, what? I know Mofra has jumped the shark a few times this year (paid nude modelling, preemptively starting top of the ladder Bulldog threads, believing scientists when it comes to science) but starting this list with arguably Collingwood's greatest ever player?

Don't you know he's 'silky'? A smooth mover? Time slows down when he has the ball, like the last five minutes of a meeting when that annoying guy puts his hand up straight away when the presenter asks if there are any questions?

Well let me remind you he is (apparently) Collingwood's captain and when it comes to hide and seek he makes Anne Frank look like an amateur.

Let us take a step back to late 2020. Collingwood were in crisis, Ned Guy (who clearly lied on his resume and presumably miss-spelled resume) has screwed up their salary cap so badly that Nathan Buckley turned up to exit interviews with a baseball bat, electrodes and (foreshadowing) no wife.
Nathan lies by telling Adam Treloar that his teammates don't like him and don't want to play with him. He's forced out of the club with Collingwood agreeing to pay $300k x 5 years for Treloar to play elsewhere. It's messy. Tom Philips is also let go for peanuts, and Jayden "Fraser Anning is my hero" Stephenson is traded to North for a second round pick. This gives us the best info graphic of the year:

View attachment 1217046
And here is Pendles' response:


Ditto when Bucks decided that chasing Insta-wannabees was more important than coaching.
Ditto when Collingwood's season went down the toilet.
Ditto when Collingwood were exposed as dirty dirty racists and their only voice of support was (presumably) Tex Walker

In fact, when you consider the leadership of Pendlebury this year you should be expressing surprise when he remembers to toss the coin before the game. He's all icing, no cake - or in terms Collingwood fans can understand, he's all eye holes and no hood.
Taking into account the short quarters last year he's well down on input on field as well, with the exception of clangers.

The year wasn't a total write off though. At least he got to see good friend Patty Mills win a bronze medal at the Olympics this year, no doubt inspired by Pendles' uplifting speech just before the game:


Of course, he then considered going to another club on a Sam Mitchell-type deal then backflipped when Collingwood supporters en masses remembered their social media passwords. Ta da.

Fun fact: Pendlebury actually played less basketball as a junior than the total amount of time commentators have wasted on telling people he played basketball as a junior.

Pendles, if you do ever try to hunt me down I'll protect myself by telling you I'm a journalist and watching you run away (wow, he retreated but it was really smooth). Thank you for kicking off the Bottom 50 for 2021.

On the first day of Mofraness, my true love gave to me...

 

[Grave Danger]

Scott Pendlebury

10

Scott Pendlebury

Age

36

Ht

191cm

Wt

86kg

Pos.

Mid

Career

Season

Last 5

D

26.5

5star

K

13.2

5star

HB

13.3

5star

M

4.1

4star

T

4.9

5star

CL

4.9

5star

D

25.1

5star

K

12.3

5star

HB

12.9

5star

M

3.4

3star

T

2.3

3star

CL

3.6

4star

D

12.4

4star

K

7.6

3star

HB

4.8

4star

M

5.8

5star

T

2.6

4star

on the Bottom 50 list - surely that's a gag?

 

[TedDougChris]

Wallis doesn't qualify on games played, plus no one has got close to this down hill skier for the last 5 years, when you average 5 possessions a game and run away from physical contact you are hands down to be #1:


View attachment 1218362

An assorted collection of shit haircuts should also assist here....

 

[RossFC]

For Port I'd nominate Hartlett (who is cooked), maybe Byrne-Jones who had a massive drop off from his AA season the year before.

 

[NSWCROW]

The List:
#50 - Scott Pendlebury

OH LAWWWWWWDY

Mof ain't playin !

 

[Chaisa]

Remember, you aren't allowed to injury troll on this board.

Unless you're a weak gutless flog like Mofra, in which case go for it.

Didn’t take long for the melts to start.

Will melt if Sam Reid isn’t Top 10.

 

[hawkman]

Didn’t take long for the melts to start.

Will melt if Sam Reid isn’t Top 10.

Which Sam Reid?

 

[ImissFrosty]

If Sam Frost

8

Sam Frost

Age

31

Ht

194cm

Wt

94kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

12.4

3star

K

7.1

3star

HB

5.2

4star

M

3.7

4star

T

1.9

4star

MG

191.6

3star

D

10.5

3star

K

6.3

3star

HB

4.3

3star

M

4.0

4star

T

1.5

2star

MG

191.6

3star

D

11.2

3star

K

6.0

3star

HB

5.2

4star

M

3.6

4star

T

1.4

4star

makes it like last year, there will be riots. RIOTS i tell ya

 

[weltschmerz]

How much does off-field stuff improve someone's ranking? Jaidyn Stephenson

2

Jaidyn Stephenson

Age

25

Ht

189cm

Wt

79kg

Pos.

Fwd

Career

Season

Last 5

D

13.2

3star

K

8.8

3star

HB

4.4

3star

M

4.7

4star

T

2.6

4star

G

1.5

5star

D

11.0

3star

K

6.7

3star

HB

4.3

3star

M

3.5

3star

T

2.7

4star

G

1.2

5star

D

12.6

4star

K

8.0

3star

HB

4.6

4star

M

3.4

4star

T

3.4

5star

G

1.4

5star

breaking his hip from a BMX and booze incident should propel him a fair way.

 

[Tippett2Goal]

Which Sam Reid?

They can both share the same spot

 

[Forward Press]

I've nominated the players from West Coast that should be considered.

West Coast Eagles Football Club Player List

West Coast Eagles full AFL playing list and stats.

www.footywire.com

 

[tugga]

If Cotchin and lynch aren't in the top 5 then they never will be.

 

[Dewnior]

Yep the upside down toilet brush look really stood out

Got his inspiration from Chris Mayne

 

[zackah]

Melbourne comes out of lockdown or Mofra finishes this thread.

what comes first?

 

[Todman]

Melbourne comes out of lockdown or Mofra finishes this thread.

what comes first?

Mofra finishing the 2022 list.

 

[tonygeeks]

For Port I'd nominate Hartlett (who is cooked), maybe Byrne-Jones who had a massive drop off from his AA season the year before.

Yeah but try to write a funny paragraph about Darcy Byrne - Jones

Decent young player

Plays for Port

Went backwards a bit in 2021

The end


Sent from my iPad using BigFooty.com

 

[ImissFrosty]

Yeah but try to write a funny paragraph about Darcy Byrne - Jones

Decent young player

Plays for Port

Went backwards a bit in 2021

The end


Sent from my iPad using BigFooty.com

could write an essay on how shit his hair is

 

[The Wrecker]

Think it is Mason Cox

46

Mason Cox

Age

33

Ht

211cm

Wt

110kg

Pos.

F/R

Career

Season

Last 5

D

8.7

2star

K

5.2

2star

HB

3.5

3star

M

4.0

4star

T

1.6

4star

G

1.2

4star

D

6.0

1star

K

3.0

1star

HB

3.0

2star

M

2.3

2star

T

0.3

1star

G

1.0

4star

D

9.0

3star

K

5.4

2star

HB

3.6

3star

M

2.6

3star

T

2.4

4star

G

1.8

5star

's or Trent Cotchin

9

Trent Cotchin

Age

34

Ht

185cm

Wt

86kg

Pos.

M/F

Career

Season

Last 5

D

23.4

5star

K

13.8

5star

HB

9.5

5star

M

3.4

3star

T

3.9

5star

CL

5.2

5star

D

19.0

4star

K

9.5

4star

HB

9.5

5star

M

2.7

3star

T

4.3

5star

CL

3.5

4star

D

16.6

4star

K

8.0

3star

HB

8.6

5star

M

4.6

5star

T

1.0

3star

's year. Impeccable candidates.
Mitch McGovern

11

Mitch Mcgovern

Age

30

Ht

190cm

Wt

88kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

10.1

3star

K

7.2

3star

HB

2.9

3star

M

4.6

4star

T

2.2

4star

MG

189.8

3star

D

7.6

2star

K

6.5

3star

HB

1.1

1star

M

3.6

4star

T

1.9

3star

MG

179.6

3star

D

10.8

3star

K

6.8

3star

HB

4.0

3star

M

4.0

4star

T

3.0

5star

MG

218.0

4star

, Jason Johannisen

39

Jason Johannisen

Age

32

Ht

181cm

Wt

82kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

20.2

5star

K

12.9

5star

HB

7.3

5star

M

4.3

4star

T

2.0

4star

MG

418.9

5star

D

16.3

4star

K

10.0

4star

HB

6.3

4star

M

4.3

4star

T

1.9

3star

MG

283.1

4star

D

15.6

4star

K

9.2

4star

HB

6.4

4star

M

2.6

3star

T

1.6

4star

, Will Hoskin Elliot, Dom Tyson

21

Dom Tyson

Age

31

Ht

186cm

Wt

85kg

Pos.

Mid

Career

Season

Last 5

D

22.3

5star

K

10.4

4star

HB

12.0

5star

M

4.3

4star

T

3.5

5star

CL

3.8

5star

No current season stats available

D

14.0

4star

K

5.0

2star

HB

9.0

5star

M

3.2

4star

T

1.8

4star

CL

2.4

5star

, Izaac Rankine and James Frawley

24

James Frawley

Age

36

Ht

193cm

Wt

96kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

14.2

4star

K

9.2

4star

HB

5.1

4star

M

5.1

5star

T

1.9

4star

MG

135.4

2star

D

8.7

2star

K

6.0

2star

HB

2.7

2star

M

3.0

3star

T

0.9

2star

MG

135.4

2star

D

9.0

3star

K

4.0

2star

HB

5.0

4star

M

1.8

2star

T

1.2

3star

will no doubt feature.

 

[Stronzo]

The Eagles second ruckmen, old what’s his face.