Media Rat of the Week - Official Media Thread

[jackster83]

#ratoftheweek - Round 11 edition

Welcome back for another edition of #ratoftheweek. As we approach another finals series, the cream of the crop starts to rise, and today I have one of the leaders of the Swamprats, star forward SarahSmiles. Forced to move to CHF by the arrival of the previous #ratoftheweek in Hatchy1992, the four time Groove medal winner has had to diversify her his gameplay. This week I caught up with him at Sin City Starbucks. He orders the coffees and we sit down and start chatting. I ask him how Chelsea are travelling and he hands me a newspaper with his photo on the front page.

Boozed-up fan who invaded Crystal Palace pitch told cops 'I've been a t***'

www.croydonadvertiser.co.uk


Me: How have you judged the Rats' season so far?

SS: Largely inconsistent, but the kids have gone alright and I can easily seeing us winning another flag. Although that would be because I have access to the simmers PM and I can see the results for the rest of the season.


Me: How have you found the move up the field to CHF?

SS: Strange and I often find myself gravitating towards the goal square. I dislike it as I have to run more, but also I get to take more punts from 55 metres out so you know yin and yang. I get to use my Qooty head a lot more and it's nice being involved in moves instead of just reaping the rewards of an easy goal, it gives me a nice little warm feeling.


Me: You are only 12 goals behind Elite Finger Twirler on the Rats' all time goalkicking list. Will you be prioritising the milestone ahead of your team mates?

SS: Put it this way, if I collect the ball on the edge of the centre square under immense pressure and have an easy kick to an open teammate 25 metres away or a half chance to launch for goal from 75 metres out, the team mate is probably going to be left fuming.


Me: Who is the meanest defender you've played against?

SS: HawkAussie drew inspiration from a certain former Hawthorn captain and wouldn't stop pinching me.


Me: Should the Alberton/Sin City Swamprats history be taught in schools?

SS: 100%, we need to indoctrinate teach the next generations of superstars as early as possible. Plus I want as many people as possible to hear about my Qooty heroics.


Me: What are you up to outside of qooty?

SS: Trying to balance finishing school, work, a social life and all the brand endorsement shoots that come with my qooty superstardom


Me: Light or dark mode?

SS: Light mode. No competition.


Me: This coffee tastes strange. What did you put in mine?

SS: It's called oat milk. By the way, it cost 50 cents more, so when you pay me back for the coffee, make sure you don't forget about that.

Well, seeing as the yearly budget has just been blown, that will have to do us for this week. Thanks for turning in!

 

[TJASTA]

To landfill or not to landfill

 

[Greenery]

To landfill or not to landfill

When your only schtick is something about oatmilk the answer is pretty clear

 

[jackster83]

#ratoftheweek - Round 12 edition

Welcome back to another edition of #ratoftheweek.

After a performance against the Demons that can only be described as no good, the Swamprats could use a spark this week. This week's #ratoftheweek is the self-deprecating, dual premiership utility Firestarter. While he likes to say some funky shit, and is quick to shoot down any praise, us at the Rats certainly breathe easier when he's in the side.



Me: How did you come to join the Rats?
FS: Dingster and Ant Bear messaged me with an invitation. I realised I wanted a different place other than the North boards to ramble and shoot the proverbial -- especially when I'm so salty at the club that I stay away from the site altogether -- so I jumped at the chance.

Me: Do you have a pre-game routine? Any superstitions?
FS: Usually I have a bad feeling about the week ahead. Lately I've been telling everyone that I hate them and will see them next week. It often doesn't work so I have to find another way to get fired up.

Me: The Rats have been in a bit of a form slump of late, losing three of their last four games. Anything you can put your finger on that might be the cause?
FS: Me. The end.

Me: How did you survive the lockdown last year? (Over here in Adelaide we lost our minds at being locked up for three days - it was chaos in the bottleshops)
FS: I'm an introverted hermit at the best of times. As long as I know I can get toilet paper once a week I'm happy as Larry. Lockdown was a strange kind of blessing.

Me: With the Warriors leading, and the Bombers in second spot on the ladder, are you concerned that corruption may be present in the SFA?
FS: There's always been corruption in the SFA. I just figured we paid the next man up who pays the next man up from him. Like a well-oiled machine of deceit and lies.

Me: What initiatives would you like the SFA to bring in for season 32?
FS: It's possible to have initiatives? What, like a Grand Final breakfast thread that isn't the match thread?

Me: Ant Bear was seen rocking up to the Monday recovery (pub) session with a black eye? That wouldn't be as a result of the jokes he was making about North Melbourne would it?
FS: Unless he was also bending over and shuffling like he needed to take the longest piss, that wasn't me. I did offer a pint, though -- just never told him what was in it.

Well that does it for this week's edition of #ratoftheweek. Let's hope he can smack the Gumbies up.

Thanks for joining and we'll you all again next week.

 

[Greenery]

nice pic jackster83

 

[jackster83]

#ratoftheweek - Round 13 edition

Welcome back for another installment of #ratoftheweek. Following on from Firestarter winning the award last week, we've got another Rats' heavyweight for you again this week. This highly esteemed midfield has an All-SFA gong and a Toots medal to go with his two premiership medallions.

I caught up with him as he was gathering snacks and preparing to watch his beloved Swans.



Me: How did you come to join the Swamprats?

GtG: I stumbled upon the league while looking around the non-footy forums... While drunk... with no pants on... eating a bagel... So the Swampies seemed an obvious fit.

Legit.

Me: Most memorable win as a Swamprat?

GtG: The first GF win was pretty special.

Me: Can you see yourself ever attempting to repeat the 27-posts-per-week benchmark that made you respected by your team mates and positively feared by opponents?

GtG: Respected? Oh... uhhh... yeah, uh... ahem. Of course. Me. Ahem. Respected. Ahhh, yeah. Ummmm.... No.

Not 27. That was soooo season 28 to remind everyone about the season 27 premiers... Wait until we win our next one.

Me: Is it true that you put Rats rookie Catsnlakers in his place when he tried to steal your midfield spot?

GtG: Yes. I haven't been here having to deal with the smells, lack of pay or clothing for some bloody rookie hack (no offense to that rookie hack) to come waltzing in & steal my rightfully deserved hardly fought for spot ffs... If the LG ever wanted a Furies style plastic cutlery mutany... just sayin...

Me: In the spirit of the current match thread with the Dragons, what are your top three things to put on hot chips? (gravy, chicken salt, tomato sauce, etc)

GtG: 1. More hot chips
2. Chicken salt
3. Gravy

Me: How do you get out of work to go on the various qooty trips?

GtG: I drug my boss with alcohol & various sedatives & other narcotics... He loves it, so it works well for everyone.

Me: Slightly serious question now. How do you think the league is travelling at the moment in terms of posting quality and the level of interaction between posters?

GtG: Posting quality in the SweetFA is like a Picaso... it's what you make it. Where one poster sees the slight tinges of beauty another just sees a sloppy steamer.

Not sure exactly which kind of interaction between posters we should openly discuss here mate... ummm, it's been, uh... Good, I guess?!? Right?! I've not noticed much difference since stepping back last season honestly. I just hope everyone is enjoying themselves.

Well that wraps up another intriguing #ratoftheweek. Apologies for the lateness. Do tune in again next week - rumour has it, another LG member could be in the gun.