Robertio
Spotswood Guinness Bar manager
Nup, has your captain changed his name again yet?
Official Match Thread Season 31 - First Preliminary Final: West Coast Wonders vs Baghdad Bombers at The Colosseum
- Thread starter DenieD
- Start date
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Won't be too far away mate. Not happy in his own skin that lad....Identity crisis!
philreich
Premium Platinum
- Mar 2, 2014
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Grand Uncle Horace is schizophrenic, and so is he........
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
Grand Uncle Horace
Shake down the thunder
That is cheap, not funny and not your usual good form.
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
An Australian ventriloquist is visiting Afghanistan.
One day he walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the villager "can I talk to your dog?"
Villager: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going mate?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Villager: **look of extreme shock**
Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" **pointing at the villager**
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Villager: **look of utter disbelief**
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Villager: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either....I think."
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool"
Villager: **absolutely dumbfounded**
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" **pointing at the villager**
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Villager: **total look of amazement**
Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your goat?"
Villager: **panic intensifies** "The goat's a liar!"
Not yet
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
I think this week should be dedicated to shitty gifs and shoops of ClarkeM
I’ll start, and the rest of you follow suit.
K?
Good.
First up is one of our first dates when I took him ice skating
Then I videoed him while he was vibing to some tunes from Spotify before we hit the club,
and then there was the time I tried to teach him pottery.
I’ll start, and the rest of you follow suit.
K?
Good.
First up is one of our first dates when I took him ice skating
Then I videoed him while he was vibing to some tunes from Spotify before we hit the club,
and then there was the time I tried to teach him pottery.
philreich
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Stupid football - how do you pick a winner????
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
Go to a hot dog stand or a piss trough at the pub.
Ohhhhhh, you said “winner”
My bad.
TheCoach16
Brownlow Medallist
- Sep 16, 2015
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Thanks, philreich !
Speaking of ventriloquists...
Ventriloquist is doing his show on stage. Drinking a big glass of water whilst telling “blonde jokes”. Just one blonde joke after another. Relentless.
A lady with blonde hair in the audience stands up and yells furiously...
“This kind of humour simply isn’t funny. It’s dated and irrelevant. There is absolutely no correlation between the colour of a person’s hair, and their intelligence! It’s lazy, and it appeals to the lowest common denominator, and quite frankly I refuse to stand here and allow this disgraceful display to continue!”
The ventriloquist, genuinely shaken, replies
“Miss, I apologise if I’ve offended you in any way. That was never my int...”
The blonde lady interrupts, and says,
“I wasn’t talking to you! I was talking to the little fella sitting on your lap!”
- Jan 27, 2017
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Wait it's the same guy? I thought we were just going through a lot of captains?
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
A couple are on a blind date. She, a New York realtor; he, a Russian businessman. After a lovely dinner, conversation turns to world affairs, and the man expresses some anti-Islamic views.
The woman is incensed, but the guy is cute so she decides to give him a second chance: “I don’t know what’s acceptable in Russia, but I don’t want to hear any of that bigoted rhetoric. Not another word! I’m going to the washroom to cool off and we’ll try again.” As the woman leaves the table the man curses himself for revealing his less politically correct side so early on. He promises himself it won’t happen again.
Suddenly, there is a great uproar as a small sheep enters the restaurant and starts smashing everything in sight. The man ducks for cover as glasses smash and tables flip. As quickly as it appeared, the little sheep is gone, leaving the room in a state of chaotic destruction.
The woman arrives back at the table and surveys the scene: “Oh my god! I was only gone 2 minutes and it looks like a bomb went off. What happened?”
The man hesitates, then a small smile crosses his lips as he answers:
“Is lamb”.
- Sep 13, 2013
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I like to be able to see through my beerDrink 10 of these mate and you can become whatever you want.
JT_the_Man
Draft King
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
For Flynn, no doubt?
- Jan 27, 2017
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Newcombe on the bench, bianco on the field
JT_the_Man
Draft King
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
ClarkeM
Wonders 🏆🏆🏆🏆
- Mar 14, 2007
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I’m feeling a new avatar…
- Jan 27, 2017
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who's the prick in the photo?
ClarkeM
Wonders 🏆🏆🏆🏆
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New Wonders recruit.
haydo
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I haven’t posted in 8 weeks… oh wait…
VainGlorious
Unaccommodating
Looks like Collingwood’s version of Joe Dirt.
