Autopsy Top and Bottom five AFL commentators

[Magpie Girl]

16 posts

 

[the mighty T]

Lot of dislike for Robbo on here. I dont mind him, purely because he's passionate and hes more of a fan than anything else. And I like Gerards work too.. maybe im just a 360 fangirl

The Best imo

Dermott - Insightful bloke, knows a lot about the game

Dunstall - Wildly underrated in terms of his football knowledge.. watch On The Couch this year and youll know what I mean.

Eddie - Call me biased, but his calling is still superb

Michael Christian - Great commentator. Love his work

Rex - All time favorite

(Honorable mentions: Dennis and Sandy, both fairly awesome)

 

[PieNSauce]

I will go straight from the top to the bottom here. There are plenty of match day commentators that I particularly dislike and precious few that I like but for me, Commetti is definitely my personal favorite. I know he's a bit slapstick at times and his humour is well rehearsed but I quite like that about him and frankly I reckon his knowledge of the game is pretty damned good. Bruce is the one I just can't stand. I think it's all about perception because he does hide his bias better than some but he has always struck me as a Pie hater of the highest order. The comment that always comes back to me was made during the final quarter of the 2010 replayed GF. It was Dennis who said words to the effect that everyone except Collingwood supporters will be leaving Melbourne about now... to which Bruce replied something like "isn't that everyone?" I'm sorry but apart from the complete lack of any logic even of the irony genre, that would be about as feeble an attempt at humour as I've ever heard and I reckon it came from fairly deep in his psyche.

 

[Old Spice]

Dennis is pretty funny. It might be rehearsed, but that's an admirable quality anyway, to go in prepared.

I did like the librarian comment during the 2010 GF and also the one on pressure 'it's coming out of their ears.' That is good gaggery.

 

[cleomenes]

I will go straight from the top to the bottom here. There are plenty of match day commentators that I particularly dislike and precious few that I like but for me, Commetti is definitely my personal favorite. I know he's a bit slapstick at times and his humour is well rehearsed but I quite like that about him and frankly I reckon his knowledge of the game is pretty damned good. Bruce is the one I just can't stand. I think it's all about perception because he does hide his bias better than some but he has always struck me as a Pie hater of the highest order. The comment that always comes back to me was made during the final quarter of the 2010 replayed GF. It was Dennis who said words to the effect that everyone except Collingwood supporters will be leaving Melbourne about now... to which Bruce replied something like "isn't that everyone?" I'm sorry but apart from the complete lack of any logic even of the irony genre, that would be about as feeble an attempt at humour as I've ever heard and I reckon it came from fairly deep in his psyche.

But don't you glory in these kinds of comments? I find it one of the best things about being a Collingwood supporter. It's great to know that of all the clubs, it is ours that evokes the most rage, fear and disquiet of all kinds from our opposition.

 

[Stripes B and W]

Top 5

Dennis C
Pete Donagan
Eddie
Emma Q
Dermot/King/Ling on a par. Mooney a big plus
I'd also throw up Whately, Sheehan as enjoyable at times

Bottom 5

Ch 7 Saturday night crew, it is so bad it's impossible to watch for any length of time.
Luke Darcy, sexist, overtly male and predictable.
Bruce / Andy Maher
Caroline W
Hamish McL

I'd then bundle Dwayne, Johnson, shaw

 

[PieNSauce]

But don't you glory in these kinds of comments? I find it one of the best things about being a Collingwood supporter. It's great to know that of all the clubs, it is ours that evokes the most rage, fear and disquiet of all kinds from our opposition.

Of course I do but there's a difference between someone loathing our club and saying so and someone who loathes our club pretending that it's not so.

 

[Augustine]

Love the thread guys.

Best:

Bruce - Look I used to hate the guy. His overuse of the word clever, his outrageously specific statistics, his over the top excitement over flashy players, his obvious comments about the scoreline (if Collingwood kick the next one they'll be right back in this). But overtime I've come to love all of those things. I don't know why getting excited about the footy (and with bruce it's genuine excitement) can be considered a bad thing. He doesn't know football tactically but he gets you excited about the game.

Commetti - Snuck up behind him like a librarian, ahh the old statue of liberty trick, that tackle was like a Melbourne tram a lot jumped on but nothing was paid, etc etc. Sometimes they're rehearsed but a lot of the time they're off the cuff. His voice screams footy.

Hudson - Most proffesional commentator in the game. He's a Geelong diehard, but watch that Swans Geelong final where Nick Davis kicked four and the winner in the dying seconds and you wouldn't guess it. "Nick Davis! Nick Davis! I see it, but I don't believe it!"

Maguire - I genuinely like him as a commentator. It puzzles me where the hatred for him comes from. Also he loves North

Worst:

Bazil - Commentators really only have to do one thing during the week, learn players names. Awful commentator

BT - Sorry but I can't stand it when he does that talking about players in first person thing: "My names Buddy Franklin and I'm going to kick a goal at the MCG". Also talks about my team with utter disdain. Just call the footy BT, stop trying to make wowee into a signature catchphrase like Marvellous for Richie Benaud.

Richo - Ok Richo, when it's half time and you interview the Auskick kids, do not ask yes/no questions. That will lead to the kid responding with just a yes or a no followed by an awkward silence as you wait for him or her to elaborate, which they inevitably won't do. Ling does that job so much better.

 

[Old Spice]

5. Jon Pierik - invariably you'll find his name on the end of a North Melbourne pump-prime or reminiscence of Buckley snubbing North. Loves to get the bat out on Collingwood when things aren't travelling well.

Right on cue.

http://www.theage.com.au/afl/afl-ne...ns-and-tony-shaw-comments-20140311-hvhdh.html

 

[ratherdan]

Dermott 'I saw a fly and I'll describe how many eyes it has while the play goes on' Brereton

 

[Baltimore Jack]

Dermott 'I saw a fly and I'll describe how many eyes it has while the play goes on' Brereton

"....and I won't use 5 simple words to describe it, I'll use 50 words with multiple meanings that no-one will understand to give the impression that I'm intelligent"

 

[Chilli Con Incarnate]

The Good:
Dennis Commetti is probably my favourite general commentator.

Dermie brings a close analysis of one on one contests that is very interesting and really helps enhance the action/replays. He also generally has something positive to say about every team or player.

Gerard Whateley is very good on 360. He is always straight down the line when explaining a story and he never tries to hide his opinion once he is asked for it. He doesn't make grandiose statements to chase a headline like others in the industry, he just says exactly what he thinks about an issue.

The Bad:
I used to like Bruce, but he seems to be too into it these days. He always has to offer an opinion on a free or potential free even when there is no need to. If he is commentating a Hawks game, I can't actually watch it. I suppose this might be better now that Buddy is gone so we won't be going from 'BUDDDDDDDDY!' to 'CYRILLLLLLL!' every minute.

David King is someone who strikes me as making too many big statements that he is never made accountable for. He just chases headline and tries to drum up debate over issues that aren't really relevant.

The Ugly:
I hate listening to Andy Maher. The guy is a joke. It's not just his annoying voice or Carlton bias, but also how he'll readily pot anyone behind their back, but then when he interviews that same person, he sucks up to them like a teachers pet.

 

[76woodenspooners]

I was a big fan of 'The captain and the major'.

No idea what they were talking about, but it was still entertaining!

 

[Vicky Park]

Love the thread guys.

Best:

Bruce - Look I used to hate the guy. His overuse of the word clever, his outrageously specific statistics, his over the top excitement over flashy players, his obvious comments about the scoreline (if Collingwood kick the next one they'll be right back in this). But overtime I've come to love all of those things. I don't know why getting excited about the footy (and with bruce it's genuine excitement) can be considered a bad thing. He doesn't know football tactically but he gets you excited about the game.

Commetti - Snuck up behind him like a librarian, ahh the old statue of liberty trick, that tackle was like a Melbourne tram a lot jumped on but nothing was paid, etc etc. Sometimes they're rehearsed but a lot of the time they're off the cuff. His voice screams footy.

Hudson - Most proffesional commentator in the game. He's a Geelong diehard, but watch that Swans Geelong final where Nick Davis kicked four and the winner in the dying seconds and you wouldn't guess it. "Nick Davis! Nick Davis! I see it, but I don't believe it!"

Maguire - I genuinely like him as a commentator. It puzzles me where the hatred for him comes from. Also he loves North

Worst:

Bazil - Commentators really only have to do one thing during the week, learn players names. Awful commentator

BT - Sorry but I can't stand it when he does that talking about players in first person thing: "My names Buddy Franklin and I'm going to kick a goal at the MCG". Also talks about my team with utter disdain. Just call the footy BT, stop trying to make wowee into a signature catchphrase like Marvellous for Richie Benaud.

Richo - Ok Richo, when it's half time and you interview the Auskick kids, do not ask yes/no questions. That will lead to the kid responding with just a yes or a no followed by an awkward silence as you wait for him or her to elaborate, which they inevitably won't do. Ling does that job so much better.

Like your post, but no love for cuddly, likable Richo? He's soooo nice...

 

[Vicky Park]

I was a big fan of 'The captain and the major'.

No idea what they were talking about, but it was still entertaining!

76er - did they exist? Or only in the fertile imaginations of HG and Roy?

 

[Quicky]

Dennis is pretty funny. It might be rehearsed, but that's an admirable quality anyway, to go in prepared.

I did like the librarian comment during the 2010 GF and also the one on pressure 'it's coming out of their ears.' That is good gaggery.

What did Graeme Kennedy say? The best ad lib is practiced ad lib. Or something to that effect. Commetti is a true pro in the industry.

 

[Stripes B and W]

Dennis is pretty funny. It might be rehearsed, but that's an admirable quality anyway, to go in prepared.

I did like the librarian comment during the 2010 GF and also the one on pressure 'it's coming out of their ears.' That is good gaggery.

Think Dennis'lines are rehearsed, more power to him for that as you say.

My fav Commetti-ism would have to be, paraphrased, ' He went into the pack optimistically and came out misty optically'. Now thats another slice of good gaggery!!

Shouldn't have forgotton Huddo in the best commentators list either. Significant oversight!

 

[Maggie5]

76er - did they exist? Or only in the fertile imaginations of HG and Roy?

Yeah they existed, very frustrating as I never knew where the ball ball or who was kicking it. Only by reading the paper did I actually know which game they were broadcasting.

 

[Magnus the Magpie]

As far as callers of the game go, I like the old style callers, Sandy Roberts, Drew Morphett, Peter Donegan, those types who just call the game without the extra shit that the likes of Dwayne Russell and Brian Taylor throw into their calling.

As for journos, there are so few and far between, Sam Landesberger is one of the better out there, and obviously Emma Quayle has it all covered when it comes to the drafts and youngsters.

Yep, all first-rate. I especially like Donegan - footy or horse-racing and his VFL calls are a joy to listen to. While still on the positive side (and very surprisingly perhaps), I quite like Tim Watson - has every reason to be massively biased but, in the main, is very even-handed and knowledgeable.

Hard to argue against any of the bottom-5 (50?) nominees but, for the other old-timers, I'd suggest that all pale in comparison to Ian Robertson: his pro-Carlton/anti-Collingwood bias was unbelievable: every free we got, the ump was wrong and vice-versa. His contribution is the one thing that spoils any reprise of the 1990 GF.

 

[Buena]

Has anybody ever seen Basil Zempilas and Jeff Goldblum in the same room?? Just putting it out there.

I like the Saturday night team - just because they put a bit of fun into it. Bruce shits me, he just crawls up to Dennis all night, and says ridiculous things about his favourite players.
And I agree with DaVe86 about Dwayne Russell. "Choas ball", and "makes it someone else's problem" are his go to sayings.

 

[jmac70]

I liked BT until he sold out.

 

[forwardflanker]

i loved the old school commentators from the 80's and early 90's a lot more than the current crop. They did stuff that just doesn't happen anymore - i.e. when a fight breaks out they always used to call the fight instead of the game. Also when ever someone got donged the standard line was "he just copped a beauty" or "got him", much better than the modern family oriented and negative views concerning on field gratuitous violence from the commentators.

 

[RuFiO]

And I agree with DaVe86 about Dwayne Russell. "Choas ball", and "makes it someone else's problem" are his go to sayings.

Show Dwayne some respect.
You left out "chaos tackle".

 

[PeterMc06]

IMO there is no such thing as a good commentator anymore. However, they all seem to be very good coaches that are on the respective channels.

 

[Obese Arachnid]

Apparently, everyone loves him but Sandy "crescendo" Roberts use to drive me nuts!!