Opinion Commentary & Media VI

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Wayne Carey reveals detail of affair ‘never spoken about before’​



North Melbourne coach Denis Pagan says he wished Wayne Carey had simply apologised to former teammate Anthony Stevens before the football club imploded.

Speaking to his former coach about his infamous 2002 affair with Stevens’ wife Kelli for the first time, Carey has revealed details of the tryst that rocked Australian football.

Speaking on his new podcast, The Truth Hurts, Carey this week said he never considered apologising to Stevens in the days that followed the affair becoming public.

Carey says the pair had never spoken about it before.

Pagan said it wounds him that his former players are not on speaking terms and have never mended their friendships back together.

Pagan believes the bomb could have been defused with an apology in the immediate aftermath of the scandal being discovered.

“It was the greatest tragedy in my time in coaching. Even to the point now I knew how much pressure you were under,” Pagan said on the podcast.

“I wish we could have changed it. You could have come out straight away and said, ‘I am terribly, terribly sorry.’

“I thought you were reluctant to say you were sorry at the start.

“It’s easy for me to say I wish you had done this and I wish you had grabbed Stevo and embraced him and said, “I am terribly sorry, whatever you want me to do I will do it”.

“But that is easy for me to say, I don’t want to know the details of it. It is just one of the sad facts of life.

“You talked about regrets, it’s one of your biggest regrets and I am sure even now if you could have done anything to change it, it did destroy the fabric of the football club and we did pick up the pieces a bit but we were never quite the same.

“When I think how close everyone was and how close you were, it was tragic. We had such a bond and it was broken and even now there is still a bit of angst and I hate to see it. All we can do now is pick up the pieces. I see you, I see Glenn (Archer) and I see Anthony and I just wish it could have been like the old times.

“I wish you could have gone up to Echuca for the weekend or Sydney for the weekend and come back and have all been mates and tricked the coach that you’ve only had two chandys and didn’t have a beer and we could have all gone on but it happened, that’s life we’re not going to change it and these things occur.

“When I think of it now it still devastates me to think, I wish it didn’t happen but it’s life.”

Carey responded by saying an apology was never an option at the time because he believed the bridge had been burned.

“I was really quick to just ring (North Melbourne officials) Geoff Walsh and Greg Miller and rang straight away.

“The thought was, they say fight or flight. But straight away the thought for me was I have got to walk away. There was no other thought in my mind.

“For those who think I got sacked, that wasn’t the case. I quit straight away. There was no thought. The apology thing (to Stevens to save his Kangaroos career) never really came into mind at that point. It was just, “I have to separate myself from the club”.”

Sad that Pagan is still so hurt, must almost be like watching your sons fallout and never get along.

But it seems like he believes that Wayne immediately apologizing would have prevented him leaving, Stevo and thee boys wern't accepting that nor should they have. There was no way Wayne could stay. His position was untenable.

"It did destroy the fabric of the football club and we did pick up the pieces a bit but we were never quite the same" .:(:'(
 
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It's over 20 years ago, it's old news.

It's never going to go away.:(

Only a flag and a new set of North Melbourne immortals will make everyone forget those guys.

McKernan, Archer and Stevens would love nothing more than to pass the baton to a new premiership unit.
 


The GF that shall not be named still burns them hard.

I agree with them we should have won 1 more flag in that era. 2 certainly was not poor, but given the talent, underachieved is probably the right word. If they had the standards and facilities we do today and weren't on the piss that much, just imagine..
 
The GF that shall not be named still burns them hard.

I agree with them we should have won 1 more flag in that era. 2 certainly was not poor, but given the talent, underachieved is probably the right word. If they had the standards and facilities we do today, just imagine..

A lot of players give the impression we won because of our facilities, not in spite of them though.
 
A lot of players give the impression we won because of our facilities, not in spite of them though.

Haven't really heard that before. Interesting.

Also good old Pagan:

"That was my biggest regret, going to Carlton. It wasn't anything like what the Kangaroos were like"

Just say it Den, they were a shithole :p
 
Haven't really heard that before. Interesting.

Also good old Pagan:

"That was my biggest regret, going to Carlton. It wasn't anything like what the Kangaroos were like"

These walks down memory lane and hypotheticals are always painful.

I've always been convinced Denis had started to right the ship in 2002 and had a nucleus of mid-age and young players who would play for him.

The comeback win against St Kilda that year off the backs of several kids had me quite optimistic.
 

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These walks down memory lane and hypotheticals are always painful.

I've always been convinced Denis had started to right the ship in 2002 and had a nucleus of mid-age and young players who would play for him.

The comeback win against St Kilda that year off the backs of several kids had me quite optimistic.

They can be almost comforting sometimes.

I'd like Wayne to eventually confirm or deny the rumor that we were going to go the full 89 biff had we made the 2000 GF against the scum
 
The GF that shall not be named still burns them hard.

I agree with them we should have won 1 more flag in that era. 2 certainly was not poor, but given the talent, underachieved is probably the right word. If they had the standards and facilities we do today and weren't on the piss that much, just imagine..
Carlton were clearly the best team of 95 so we were never winning that year.
Wayne and Corey were out injured during 97 and we didn't get a good run at it.
Others may disagree, but I believe * were the best team in it in 99 so they should have won that year if they made it, and we wouldn't have won.
94 was probably our best chance at another one. Not sure we would have beaten WC in the GF, but we would have got closer than Geelong.
 
Carlton were clearly the best team of 95 so we were never winning that year.
Wayne and Corey were out injured during 97 and we didn't get a good run at it.
Others may disagree, but I believe * were the best team in it in 99 so they should have won that year if they made it, and we wouldn't have won.
94 was probably our best chance at another one. Not sure we would have beaten WC in the GF, but we would have got closer than Geelong.

Ess weren't that much better in 99, yes they were favorites if we played them in the GF but they absolutely flogged Carlton twice in the regular season and shat the bed in the prelim so they were by no means certainties. We lost only 2 games after round 4.
 
These walks down memory lane and hypotheticals are always painful.

I've always been convinced Denis had started to right the ship in 2002 and had a nucleus of mid-age and young players who would play for him.

The comeback win against St Kilda that year off the backs of several kids had me quite optimistic.
dennis more famous for puckle street than memory lane
 
Ess weren't that much better in 99, yes they were favorites if we played them in the GF but they absolutely flogged Carlton twice in the regular season and shat the bed in the prelim so they were by no means certainties. We lost only 2 games after round 4.

Almost certainly I'm biased due to my age and how my team went at the time, but I think that the mid-90s was just about the best time to watch AFL football. To beat the other mob, your weapons went head to head with their weapons, you'd back yours in but if they got hold of you then fair play to them and it was a good show to watch. Pretty soon you beat the other mob by role-players just taking their weapons away in a strategic slog. In the 90s, players were navigating their way into becoming full-time professionals and the game was in equal measures raw and polished. The balance between attack and defence was more even too.

Maybe we could have won another flag, maybe not. But that North was the best team during the best era of footy is something I'm pretty proud of.
 
Carlton were clearly the best team of 95 so we were never winning that year.
Wayne and Corey were out injured during 97 and we didn't get a good run at it.
Others may disagree, but I believe * were the best team in it in 99 so they should have won that year if they made it, and we wouldn't have won.
94 was probably our best chance at another one. Not sure we would have beaten WC in the GF, but we would have got closer than Geelong.
97 with a clear run we could have won , but alas not to be.
 
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