At his peak, Koutoufides was so good, the 17 other Carlton players just stood back, had a smoke and a beer and let Kouta do it all by himself. He was a combination of Michael Jordan, Jason Bourne and Alexander The Great. He used to roost 90m torpedos from the kick-outs, then sprint down the field and mark his own kick. They had to change the rules to stop him. Teams received an extra interchange player because the AFL decided it wasn't fair that teams could only send 21 players in against him.
Even though you're taking the piss, during 2000 Carlton games were very much like that. Kouta would be taking goal saving marks deep in defense one second then on the end of a pass into the forward 50 the next.