evo
Let's hit the f*ken road!
CharlieG seems to spend too much time doing press releases.Typical publicity hoare. 
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AFLW 2024 - Round 10 - Chat, game threads, injury lists, team lineups and more.
s,c & p board "house of reps"
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Chisel...Chisel...ChiselCharlieG said:
Sorry I am late ,after finding my first ministerial paycheck had cleared.I went on an unofficial tour of Melbourne's best gentlemens clubs and have only just got back
tortured_soul
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carlyp said:
Am i allowed to say we should kill all the lefties?
or in the least pacify them with pepper spray?
after all lefties are only good to be mocked!
tortured_soul
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A question without notice to the minister for defence, is it true that your policy is to allow all immigrants into the country without a check of their background? Isnt this opening the door for exposing ordinary Australians to terrorist attacks!
AAP
Attorney General's poisened chalice
Cracks began to appear in the Loony Left today when newly appointed Attorney General appeared reluctant to back his leader.
The member for Cafe Lattes was only luke-warm when asked to scotch rumours of a leadership challenge. "CharlieG is our leader at this time and do the best job he can in trying circumstances".
When asked about the demotion of Murray to the backbenchers the Member for Dating Girls in Berets seemed to be reluctant to support his leader. "We need our best talent in the Cabinet, not the back-benches. I would assume that the PM is aware of the history of disgruntled, demoted back-benchers in this country and would be reluctant to create more".
New legislation for a Bill of Rights announced by the PM seems not to have gone down well with his new AG. When asked to comment all we recevied was a firm "no comment thankyou".
Sources close to the AG however were quick to label the task "a poisened challice". One staffer was heard to remark "they tried to kill Gillard with Medicare Gold, now they want to kneecap Weaver with this."
Many in the ALP believe that there is no way a Leftie can walk the tightrope between freedom of speach and racial villification and come out alive. Certainly that seems to be the feeling in the AGs camp. Furthermore there is doubt the AG will be allowed to incorporate the right to strike and a living wage in the legislation without provoking a fight with business and being reeled in by the PM.
Rumours continue to abound that not all is well in the Looniest parts of Canberra.
Attorney General's poisened chalice
Cracks began to appear in the Loony Left today when newly appointed Attorney General appeared reluctant to back his leader.
The member for Cafe Lattes was only luke-warm when asked to scotch rumours of a leadership challenge. "CharlieG is our leader at this time and do the best job he can in trying circumstances".
When asked about the demotion of Murray to the backbenchers the Member for Dating Girls in Berets seemed to be reluctant to support his leader. "We need our best talent in the Cabinet, not the back-benches. I would assume that the PM is aware of the history of disgruntled, demoted back-benchers in this country and would be reluctant to create more".
New legislation for a Bill of Rights announced by the PM seems not to have gone down well with his new AG. When asked to comment all we recevied was a firm "no comment thankyou".
Sources close to the AG however were quick to label the task "a poisened challice". One staffer was heard to remark "they tried to kill Gillard with Medicare Gold, now they want to kneecap Weaver with this."
Many in the ALP believe that there is no way a Leftie can walk the tightrope between freedom of speach and racial villification and come out alive. Certainly that seems to be the feeling in the AGs camp. Furthermore there is doubt the AG will be allowed to incorporate the right to strike and a living wage in the legislation without provoking a fight with business and being reeled in by the PM.
Rumours continue to abound that not all is well in the Looniest parts of Canberra.
News Ltd.
The treasurer and deputy prime minister was quick to back the prime minister's leadership today. Saying, "It's only natural for some politicians to want more, but realistically, if Weaver can not oversee the writing of the much-need bill of rights, how could he possibly hope to be prime minister?"
The treasurer and deputy prime minister was quick to back the prime minister's leadership today. Saying, "It's only natural for some politicians to want more, but realistically, if Weaver can not oversee the writing of the much-need bill of rights, how could he possibly hope to be prime minister?"
CharlieG said:
Now we are getting somewhere. Frankstonians richly deserve Cold Chisel and Midnight Oil but we do hope our newly formed local group (subsidised by your government), The Pork Barrelers, will get the gig too. Naturally, The Peoples Republic of Frankston Brass Band will play our National Anthem, if it is written by then. (our anthem competition has attracted two entries so far but the references to our fight for freedom are considered to be a little too bloodthirsty).
In a reciprocal gesture of goodwill, it has been decided to rename our local Centrelink Office "Chez CharlieG's". We trust this meets with your approval.
Could we?,then i'd take the opposistion with me.Qsaint said:
The Age
Prime Minister CharlieG moved to shore up his civil liberties credentials yesterday.
The PM announced that former Attorney-General Murray will be appointed Minister for Civic Affairs, with his first task being to take over the government's troubled Bill of Rights legislation.
Murray will work in close consultation with the Prime Minister, with the leader's support for expansive protection of labour rights.
His leader said that Murray's revolutionary activity was now in the past and he's "looking forward to having Murray's sharp wit and dedication to the Loony Left cause back in the Cabinet".
Mr G also noted his "mild disappointment" that the Attorney-General's department proved inadequate to the task of protecting political freedoms.
Prime Minister CharlieG moved to shore up his civil liberties credentials yesterday.
The PM announced that former Attorney-General Murray will be appointed Minister for Civic Affairs, with his first task being to take over the government's troubled Bill of Rights legislation.
Murray will work in close consultation with the Prime Minister, with the leader's support for expansive protection of labour rights.
His leader said that Murray's revolutionary activity was now in the past and he's "looking forward to having Murray's sharp wit and dedication to the Loony Left cause back in the Cabinet".
Mr G also noted his "mild disappointment" that the Attorney-General's department proved inadequate to the task of protecting political freedoms.
LOL,Can the minister for civic affairs have responsibility for the Plane?he'd us it more then i would,hang on i think there's a biotech conference in Singapore in the next couple of months.PA HOG said:
Don't forget the drugs.Bombers 2003 said:
Yeah,the opposistion can come.So will i get arrested for dope smuggling?MightyFighting said:
Herald Sun
In a leaked memo, Prime Minister CharlieG is believed to have challenged Loony Left MPs to either challenge his leadership now, or give him their full support in the leadup to the coming election.
"The Prime Minister was adamant", a staffer told the Herald Sun on the condition of anonymity, "that internal dissent would not allow the country to fall into rick James' hands".
Attorney-General Weaver could not be contacted yesterday to discuss allegations that he verbally abused photographers. Weaver was captured on film in earnest discussion with former leader DaveW in a disreputable Sydney bar.
In a leaked memo, Prime Minister CharlieG is believed to have challenged Loony Left MPs to either challenge his leadership now, or give him their full support in the leadup to the coming election.
"The Prime Minister was adamant", a staffer told the Herald Sun on the condition of anonymity, "that internal dissent would not allow the country to fall into rick James' hands".
Attorney-General Weaver could not be contacted yesterday to discuss allegations that he verbally abused photographers. Weaver was captured on film in earnest discussion with former leader DaveW in a disreputable Sydney bar.
CharlieG said:
Murray. Congratulations on your appointment to Civic Affairs. To assist with your Frankston affairs, the Arts Coalition has introduced cunning linguists in your local office for when you're down there. Good luck!
tortured_soul said:
Question without notice for the Deputy Opposition Leader:
"Does the Honourable Member have any comment on fears that political terrorists are active members of the Nationalist Conservative Party? Will the Deputy leader take the only appropriate action and expel these criminals from the party?"
News Outlets R Us
The Australian Sports Minister, Mr Q, today outlined the Government's plan to overhaul the national sporting culture, by proposing a bill to outlaw Rugby League in Australia. The bill will see fines of up to a bezillion dollars for any organisation attempting to organise a Rugby League competition, with individual fines in the range of 5-10 gajillion for individuals involved in attempting to run the sport.
Mr Q was quoted as saying, "This is a great day for Australia, because we finally get rid of the plague of bum sniffing that has infested some of our major population centers for too long. Plus, Rugby League is clearly a major cause of the dumbing down of Australia in recent decades, thus by banning it in this great nation, the states of New South Wales and Queensland may, over time, increase their intellectual standing to that enjoyed by the rest of the nation." The Minister went on to add that he hoped that someone would try the Government's resolve, as there seemed to be a shortage of Government aircraft available, jepordising the Ministry of Sport's plans to relocate temporarily to the West Indies for next year's Cricket World Cup, a problem that could be alleviated by purchase of new aircraft funded by these fines.
In further detail, Australians found playing the sport overseas would be subject to penalties up to and including five eons in jail, while participating in the forbidden sport domestically would result in brain death. Calls have already been made by Australians Against Crap Sports to increase this penalty because it is believed that brain death is already a pre-requisite of the so called sport, and it would not therefore be a deterrent.
The reaction on the streets of Sydney, a prime location for Rugby League was one of jubilation. Mr A.Nonymous of Pennant Hills, a long time sufferer under the curse of Rugby League stated that this was the best thing that could happen to Sydney and the nation as a whole. "No longer must we poor Sydneysiders have to suffer the indignity of having Channel Nein force bum sniffing on us while pretending it's Friday Night Football". Mr Nonymous was planning to immediately jump on the Swans bandwagon.
Mr A.Nother, from the Brisbane suburb of Yeerongpilly also joined in praise for the Government's plan. "Rugby League is just crap, and now that it's been banned, us Queenslanders can now stop pretending we like it". Mr Nother was planning on joining in a mass demonstration at the former Brisbane Broncos stadium tomorrow, where the crowd is intending to raze the venue to the ground.
The Australian Sports Minister, Mr Q, today outlined the Government's plan to overhaul the national sporting culture, by proposing a bill to outlaw Rugby League in Australia. The bill will see fines of up to a bezillion dollars for any organisation attempting to organise a Rugby League competition, with individual fines in the range of 5-10 gajillion for individuals involved in attempting to run the sport.
Mr Q was quoted as saying, "This is a great day for Australia, because we finally get rid of the plague of bum sniffing that has infested some of our major population centers for too long. Plus, Rugby League is clearly a major cause of the dumbing down of Australia in recent decades, thus by banning it in this great nation, the states of New South Wales and Queensland may, over time, increase their intellectual standing to that enjoyed by the rest of the nation." The Minister went on to add that he hoped that someone would try the Government's resolve, as there seemed to be a shortage of Government aircraft available, jepordising the Ministry of Sport's plans to relocate temporarily to the West Indies for next year's Cricket World Cup, a problem that could be alleviated by purchase of new aircraft funded by these fines.
In further detail, Australians found playing the sport overseas would be subject to penalties up to and including five eons in jail, while participating in the forbidden sport domestically would result in brain death. Calls have already been made by Australians Against Crap Sports to increase this penalty because it is believed that brain death is already a pre-requisite of the so called sport, and it would not therefore be a deterrent.
The reaction on the streets of Sydney, a prime location for Rugby League was one of jubilation. Mr A.Nonymous of Pennant Hills, a long time sufferer under the curse of Rugby League stated that this was the best thing that could happen to Sydney and the nation as a whole. "No longer must we poor Sydneysiders have to suffer the indignity of having Channel Nein force bum sniffing on us while pretending it's Friday Night Football". Mr Nonymous was planning to immediately jump on the Swans bandwagon.
Mr A.Nother, from the Brisbane suburb of Yeerongpilly also joined in praise for the Government's plan. "Rugby League is just crap, and now that it's been banned, us Queenslanders can now stop pretending we like it". Mr Nother was planning on joining in a mass demonstration at the former Brisbane Broncos stadium tomorrow, where the crowd is intending to raze the venue to the ground.
Mr Q said:
This is a disgrace. On election night, our humbled PM said the government would govern for all people. Was that not a core promise? The obvious result of this decision will be to drive the Rugby League players underground. Will this not be an additional hardship for Sydney’s commuters? Imagine Saturday arvo, you get off the train at Wynyard and are confronted with the Wynyard team playing Museum Station for the Sydney Underground Cup! Imagine battling your way through the crowd; both of them. And what about their overseas assignments. What, are they supposed to play the Vietnamese in the Cu Chi Tunnels? I note with interest you are not banning Rugby Union, “the game they play in Heaven”, worried about the Catholic vote are we?
Pity you weren’t made Foreign Minister. Then, at least when you were away on overseas junkets, instead of calling you Q it would be Far Q !
This bill better get side tracked in the senate or you can kiss goodbye to my help with the new IR billCharlieG said:
PA HOG said:
The Government is confident that this move to free the shackles that Rugby League has held over the states of New South Wales and Queensland will have a positive effect that will well outweigh the hassles caused. Additionally, the Government feels that Rugby League players will all struggle to understand words as long as "underground", thus meaning they will be unable to hide any attempts to resurrect the sport. Additionally, it is thought that Sydney commuters would not actually notice the difference in performance of their public transport should spontaneous Rugby League games break out in stations.
The reality is that Rugby League has been holding back sport in this country, by taking resources that could be better used for more popular sports such as croquet or tunnel ball. The Government is dedicated to the prevention of waste in this country, and the eradication of Rugby League is just a part of the platform.
WA ROO said:
You represent the WA branch of the Bogan Party. None of your voters would take enough time out from the Gosnells tavern to have even heard of Rugby League.
I am the national Vice President of The Bogan Party and if you think I am going to forget about my fellow bogans in NSW and QLD.You are mistakenMr Q said:
Also everyone knows my electoral office is based out of the Coronation Hotel in Queens Park
