Official Match Thread S19 R3: Coney Island Warriors vs Gold City Royals at Van Cortlandt Park

[Frankston Rover]

Pairing the Royals against the Warriors is the literary equivalent of paring Metallica with Lou Reed for an album. It will suck, it will give you a headache, it will make you question life. That was always a given. This will, hopefully, never be used as an advertisement.

It doesn't have to be this way if only you could control your Sook Dog:

You mean your unhealthy obsession with trying to change the 'opinion' of somebody else who rates the Royals more relevant than your mob?

So you keep saying which is rather ironic in itself. You have the right to your 'opinion,' and I have the right to tell you how ******* stupid it is.

Oh so I've offended you with my 'opinion?' You should read the ones I keep to myself.

Pfft. Even when I give you an out, you still keep on yapping.

Maybe I could post some of your PM's again just to show everyone what you are really like?

 

[Sydney Bloods]

Thanks Sydney Bloods. This is clearly an area of expertise for you.

of course its part of my job, to understand how repeat offenders minds work. we discuss these issues at the rehabilitation groups i run.
which by the way if you actually showed up to once in a while you'd already have that tracking anklet removed.

 

[Jhye Clark 13]

It doesn't have to be this way if only you could control your Sook Dog:



Pfft. Even when I give you an out, you still keep on yapping.

Maybe I could post some of your PM's again just to show everyone what you are really like?

Ok Bradbury Rover has conceded. Who's next.

This should be easier than the last time these two sides faced off.

 

[Jhye Clark 13]

Are they the ones where you're wanting to stab people?

You don't always keep them to yourself tbh.

Your arse must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

 

[3KZ is Football]

the premise you put forward makes no sense.
A) pension day is irrelevant to dole bludgers, they come on different days.
B) cashies always ask's for ID you never dump hot goods there, you sell it to a mate's mate.
C) nobody pays for goonbags passion pop is cheaper at just under $5.00 a bottle they can buy 3 plus the get two more that Nato and wayne can hide in their dax.

they can also afford a disposable lighter and the small bottle of dare to retrofit into a bong.

of course its part of my job, to understand how repeat offenders minds work. we discuss these issues at the rehabilitation groups i run.
which by the way if you actually showed up to once in a while you'd already have that tracking anklet removed.

ATTENTION CONEY ISLAND WARRIORS Sydney Bloods SHOWS YOU HOW IT IS DONE.

1. 3KZ is Football makes a post about Bogan Maths.
2. Sydney Bloods responds to the post, starting a dialogue and adding value to a developing narrative within the thread. In Improvisational Drama, this is called accepting an "offer."
3. I post again, thanking Sydney Bloods for his post and making an additional "offer" by stating that Sydney Bloods appears to have some expertise.
4. Sydney Bloods accepts that offer and again develops the narrative. He makes an offer by stating that I wear an ankle bracelet.
5. I will accept that offer and away we go. Quite fun actually.

This is a creative and collaborative process. That said, it does require participants to be reasonably clever.

Well done Sydney Bloods

 

[Frankston Rover]

Ok Bradbury Rover has conceded. Who's next.

This should be easier than the last time these two sides faced off.

Maybe you could retire again?

And then ask to rejoin the bid...

Remember that BoshtrichBurger?

 

[Stronzo]

Son of God's Diary

DO NOT READ!!!!

26/2

Dear diary,

yesterday and today, I really struck a blow against the Warriors in the SFA thread.

There was this stupid innuendo posting mod from that shit board bay 13 (where I never post) and he was trying to tell me to calm down. Well I showed that maggot. I didn't wish him dead like I really wanted to (thats against the site rules I do ever hold so dear), instead I told him he posted shit! It was a really defining moment in the thread. I got him good!!

Then that dickwad FR was telling me to ease up and lift my game. So instead of telling him that I wanted to stab him (I friggen hate him to pieces!!), I kept going at him until he was bored, then I claimed victory!! It was so sweet!

After working out my anger in this little session Diary, I don't think I will have to torture any of the small animals from the menagerie.

Well, maybe just one.

Sincerly

Son of God

 

[Marlowe]

It doesn't have to be this way if only you could control your Sook Dog:

When I was a kid, people used to be afraid of my dog (I say my dog - family dog) when I would walk it without a lead. I would walk it without a lead because I knew I could trust it never to stray from me; it didn't chase cars or possums or other dogs; it was loyal as shit. I was also amused people could be so afraid of a Standard Poodle. It didn't typically look like a Poodle because my parents were lazy and rarely sheared the dog, so it looked like a mutt or a literal black sheep with nothing but giant, white snarling teeth. He was friendly, but people still ran the other way at the sight of him.

The point of this is I was raised not use leads.

 

[Jhye Clark 13]

Maybe you could retire again?

And then ask to rejoin the bid...

Remember that BoshtrichBurger?

One thing's for certain. This club will go down the same path as every other club you've stepped foot in...you are an enigma.

I expect the Warriors to fold or merge fairly soon, but at least they've lasted longer than the first two clubs you were involved in.

 

[Frankston Rover]

One thing's for certain. This club will go down the same path as every other club you've stepped foot in...you are an enigma.

I expect the Warriors to fold or merge fairly soon, but at least they've lasted longer than the first two clubs you were involved in.

More crystal balling eh?

Maybe you could predict when you're going to post something decent?

When I was a kid, people used to be afraid of my dog (I say my dog - family dog) when I would walk it without a lead. I would walk it without a lead because I knew I could trust it never to stray from me; it didn't chase cars or possums or other dogs; it was loyal as shit. I was also amused people could be so afraid of a Standard Poodle. It didn't typically look like a Poodle because my parents were lazy and rarely sheared the dog, so it looked like a mutt or a literal black sheep with nothing but giant, white snarling teeth. He was friendly, but people still ran the other way at the sight of him.

The point of this is I was raised not use leads.

Ah, the ol' double standards.

I'm supposed to reign in my blokes but your blokes are allowed to post garbage?

Good to know.

 

[BigJoeD_]

*Important Announcement*

It has recently come to my attention that the visiting Gold City Royals have not been brought up to speed on the new token system for opposing players now in effect at Van Cortlandt Park. The new tokens will grant the visiting side access to the stadiums valet parking service, as well as priority entry to the Coney Island VIP lounge (access restricted after 6:05pm).

Royals, there are three different token options available upon arrival at the stadium:

1. The SoGgy Token

Whilst seemingly robust, this token is known to deteriorate under a mere semblance of pressure. While this token will grant you access to the stadium valet, it does not grant the holder any respect or recognition from the Coney Island faithful, and access to the VIP lounge will not be permitted.


2. The Juggs Token

This token is designed to accomodate the token connoisseur - a person who takes their tokens extremely seriously. While this token does not grant the holder any specific priviledges, it is extremely robust and suitable for those with a penchant for 'pushing buttons'.


3. The Arlowe Token

While appearing to contribute great value and meaning, in reality this token does not grant the holder any great perks or benefits. While this token will grant you access to the valet precinct, it will only allow you to skirt the perimeter, where a direct passage would have been a lot more expeditious and a great deal less tedious.

 

[Sydney Bloods]

When I was a kid, people used to be afraid of my dog (I say my dog - family dog) when I would walk it without a lead. I would walk it without a lead because I knew I could trust it never to stray from me; it didn't chase cars or possums or other dogs; it was loyal as shit. I was also amused people could be so afraid of a Standard Poodle. It didn't typically look like a Poodle because my parents were lazy and rarely sheared the dog, so it looked like a mutt or a literal black sheep with nothing but giant, white snarling teeth. He was friendly, but people still ran the other way at the sight of him.

The point of this is I was raised not use leads.

 

[Stronzo]

*Important Announcement*

It has recently come to my attention that the visiting Gold City Royals have not been brought up to speed on the new token system for opposing players now in effect at Van Cortlandt Park. The new tokens will grant the visiting side access to the stadiums valet parking service, as well as priority entry to the Coney Island VIP lounge (access restricted after 6:05pm).

Royals, there are three different token options available upon arrival at the stadium:

1. The SoGgy Token

Whilst seemingly robust, this token is known to deteriorate under a mere semblance of pressure. While this token will grant you access to the stadium valet, it does not grant the holder any respect or recognition from the Coney Island faithful, and access to the VIP lounge will not be permitted.


2. The Juggs Token

This token is designed to accomodate the token connoisseur - a person who takes their tokens extremely seriously. While this token does not grant the holder any specific priviledges, it is extremely robust and suitable for those with a penchant for 'pushing buttons'.


3. The Arlowe Token

While appearing to contribute great value and meaning, in reality this token does not grant the holder any great perks or benefits. While this token will grant you access to the valet precinct, it will only allow you to skirt the perimeter, where a direct passage would have been a lot more expeditious and a great deal less tedious.

Good to see we've reigned in the perks for visiting teams

 

[Jhye Clark 13]

More crystal balling eh?

Maybe you could predict when you're going to post something decent?

Are you trying to erase that part of your less than successful career from your memory? Does it embarrass you to speak about it openly in public?

There's only so many times you can use the last line of your post in match threads, in fact almost all of your side have used it so far over the course of the first few rounds. It says something when all your opponents have ridiculed the Warriors for their standards in match threads, but the Royals first two opponents have spoken of their enjoyment in ours.

You need to wake up... nobody wants to play you guys, you are Bay 13 tripe.

I guess we've resorted to playing to your level...that's ok, we only have you once and we can look forward to the rest of the season, while you and your opponents can enjoy the same level of crap in yours.

 

[Stronzo]

You mean to say you've got another level soggy?

I thought your angry man routine was all you had.

Please, show me more of your repertoire.

 

[Frankston Rover]

Are you trying to erase that part of your less than successful career from your memory? Does it embarrass you to speak about it openly in public?

Not at all. I'm proud of my history in this competition.

As a former Administrator, Captain and Premiership Player, I think it makes me appreciate this competition more and more.

Not sure how this relates to Sunday's match though...

There's only so many times you can use the last line of your post in match threads, in fact almost all of your side have used it so far over the course of the first few rounds. It says something when all your opponents have ridiculed the Warriors for their standards in match threads, but the Royals first two opponents have spoken of their enjoyment in ours.

I'm guessing you weren't such a massive dick in those threads...

You need to wake up... nobody wants to play you guys, you are Bay 13 tripe.

You wish you were a Bay 13er. You've tried so hard to ingratiate yourself with the Bay and it's just never really worked has it?

Losing your temper, threatening people, being unfunny and basically dumb doesn't really go down well.

That's why you left the Bay and came here - the same reasons as Juggalo Balla.

Rejection is hard to take, I know. And then when you had the chance to do something special, you couldn't see it through...

Guess we can add fragile and gutless to the list too...

I guess we've resorted to playing to your level...that's ok, we only have you once and we can look forward to the rest of the season, while you and your opponents can enjoy the same level of crap in yours.

Well we certainly won't see you in the finals...

 

[Sydney Bloods]

Are you trying to erase that part of your less than successful career from your memory? Does it embarrass you to speak about it openly in public?

There's only so many times you can use the last line of your post in match threads, in fact almost all of your side have used it so far over the course of the first few rounds. It says something when all your opponents have ridiculed the Warriors for their standards in match threads, but the Royals first two opponents have spoken of their enjoyment in ours.

You need to wake up... nobody wants to play you guys, you are Bay 13 tripe.

I guess we've resorted to playing to your level...that's ok, we only have you once and we can look forward to the rest of the season, while you and your opponents can enjoy the same level of crap in yours.

see this is why i didn't bother with the royals, innate drivel. it is basic bitching, that would take pride of place in any collection of discarded letters to the editor that were salvaged from the tip.

it's so pedestrian its not even worth the .000032 seconds it would take google to fetch the multitude of internet memes and amusing simpsons jpegs as i continue to portraying you as an angry old codger.

 

[Frankston Rover]

You mean to say you've got another level soggy?

I thought your angry man routine was all you had.

Please, show me more of your repertoire.

He's the man of many faces.

Here's just a sample:
- Angry Man
- Angry Man with tears
- Angry Man with tears and full body tantrum
- Angry Man in foetal position
- Angry Man with knife
- Angry Man in retirement
- Angry Man with cat in glad wrap
- Angry Man under house arrest
- Angry Man with empty milk carton someone has put back in the fridge.
- Angry Man without TV remote
- Angry Man with cold shower when the wife turned on the washing machine

 

[Tommycash]

Maths is for nerds. I taught a maths class last week and just took a nap.

The only maths we need to know is that 1>0, etc. Thus when we score more points than your team, we will know we've one.

 

[Smoooothy]

Good to see we've reigned in the perks for visiting teams

as long as they aren't allowed access to the whore tree, i have no qualms

 

[Frankston Rover]

as long as they aren't allowed access to the whore tree, i have no qualms

The only Royal that has been in our Whore Tree is Prince Andrew...

 

[Lord_Flashheart]

At the risk of setting Son of God off on another half page cry-fest, we've had 15 of our 20 named players post so far.

I have no doubt Haduken, invinciBlues, Retired Jimmy, Norm Landrover and Sydney Bloods will be in here before Sunday night.

Currently at 12 Royals posters to 16 Warriors posters. 33% more posters.

 

[Jhye Clark 13]

Not at all. I'm proud of my history in this competition.

As a former Administrator, Captain and Premiership Player, I think it makes me appreciate this competition more and more.

I'm more interested in your time with the Koala's, (nice name) because it's eerily similar to the Warriors, a max exodus of players, but unlike the Koala's, the Warriors have managed to avoid folding for now... it won't be long until the inevitable occurs and you Sir once again search for another club to destroy.

You could also tell us about your time at the Sharks expansion bid... that lasted what, 1 season before you were forced to merge with the Dragons? Couldn't you keep players interested there either?

I guess you were then resigned to your fate and decided to disappear for a while.

For such an impressive performer according to yourself, All-SFA selection and HoF induction has still eluded you.

I'm guessing you weren't such a massive dick in those threads...

I've stooped to your level...what can I say?

Well we certainly won't see you in the finals...

Crystal ball?

 

[Sydney Bloods]

Currently at 12 Royals posters to 16 Warriors posters. 33% more posters.

wait these are actually their posters? i thought they were bots.

 

[Lord_Flashheart]

Since that day you've spent most of your time tagging me in posts and mentioning my name at every opportunity. The fact is you're envious, you have your knickers in a twist and you're doing your utmost to attempt to take down the Royals.