Official Match Thread Season 38, Round 4: Ophidian Old Boys v Coney Island Warriors @ Spotswood Oval

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Robertio said:
It's happening up here now, Telstra has been flogging Kayo for years and now they're going into competition against Foxtel even though they have shares in it so they turf Kayo out.
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Boy oh boy does Kayo need some competiton. The streaming quality and buffering are horrendous up here. But with no competitor, they just wipe their hands and go ‘oh well, too bad’
 
thewizardmelon said:
Boy oh boy does Kayo need some competiton. The streaming quality and buffering are horrendous up here. But with no competitor, they just wipe their hands and go ‘oh well, too bad’
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They do need competition mate but won't happen, i can get that other little box just for Kayo but stuff them i can watch the rugby league on free to air.
 
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Agent93 Barrybran brian_muz Dinsdale FootyGuy13 Frankston Rover Freofalcon Lord_Flashheart Mesc Mofra Ocha905 pantskyle Paracleet Piggy Smalls Purple7x08_24 raffrox Raveneyes Reginald Perrin SBYM Smoooothy Snuffaluphagus spudmaster Stokey The Filth Wizard TheInjuryFactory toxic TubbsFarquhar Volbeat zackah

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Roll up, roll up, roll up Wazzas. It's time to reveal this week's edition of Know Your Opponents.

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[Pictured: Frane Selak - an Old Boy by name and by nature. He looks a bit like Tigerturbulance as well if I'm being honest]

This week's Quinness World Record belongs to Frane Selak, a music teacher who lived in Croatia between 1929 & 2016. How does he and his legacy relate to this week's opponents in the Ophidian Old Boys? Well just like the OOFs, oldmate Frane is the tinniest bastard to grace the Earth. Check this out...

He came into the world in 1929. His parents went fishing near Dubrovnik; his mother, seven months pregnant at the time, went into labour prematurely and gave birth on the boat before they could get back to the shore. That sounds pretty lucky right? Read on...

He had his first brush with death in 1957, when a bus he was on swerved off the road and into a river. Both Selak and the bus driver managed to get out of the bus and they swam to shore. Selak later stated that Ahmet the driver never got behind the wheel without half a bottle of rakija in his system, but was an excellent driver nonetheless. In fact, they both had a shot of rakija before they boarded the bus, and the purpose of the trip was to go get a couple more rounds in the first place. They both survived the accident with a few minor cuts and bruises. That was lucky huh? Well...

While riding the rails from Sarajevo to Dubrovnik in 1962 a boulder fell on the tracks, causing the train to jump off the rails and crash into the icy river Neretva. Selak managed to break the compartment window and get out of the coach, also saving the life of an acquaintance who was travelling with him. Seventeen passengers were killed, Selak reports, but he was able to swim to shore with nothing but a broken arm and hypothermia for his troubles. Oof!

The very next year, Frane was flying from Zagreb to Rijeka. He reports that an accident saw a door come detached from the aircraft and Selak got sucked out of the plane at a height of 800m, which presently crashed. This time, nineteen people lost their lives, while the superhuman Selak was reportedly found in a haystack. He awoke in a hospital, appropriately rattled but really none the worse for wear. Escaping death three times is more than enough for most people you would think. Haha oh my sweet summer children...

In 1966, our protagonist was in another fatal accident when the bus he was riding again plunged into a river. There were four casualties, but again he came out largely unscathed.

A couple of comparatively uneventful years passed until 1970 when Selak reports that his car’s fuel tank exploded on the motorway. He just barely escaped with his seemingly-charmed life. 1973 saw another freak car incident, when a malfunctioning fuel pump leaked petrol over his vehicle and sent flames spewing through the air vents at him. Selak's hair was completely singed in this incident, but he was otherwise unharmed.

Fast forward a couple of decades to 1995, and he’s making news again as a Zagreb bus knocked him down, only causing minor injuries. Then the following year he eluded a head-on collision with a United Nations truck on a mountain curve by swerving into a guardrail, which gave way under the force. Selak was not wearing a seatbelt (he never wore one after the plane crash) and was ejected out of his Skoda, clinging to a tree branch as he watched his vehicle fall 300 feet and exploding on impact.

Oh it gets better.

Two days after his 73rd birthday, Selak won €900,000 in the lottery. He bought a luxury house, a holiday home and a boat with the winnings, then generously shared the rest of his winnings with friends and family. He reportedly bought and gifted 25 cars and lent money to a lot of people – most of which, as it usually goes, he never saw again. It didn’t turn him bitter, and he occasionally joked he didn’t really have a business mind. He coincidentally also married for the fifth time around this point (proving that it wasn't all good luck for Frane), and decided to live the rest of his days in a more humble manner. Hopefully a trait that our opponents will adopt at some stage.

He finally passed away in 2016, at 86 years of age. In the last decade or so Selak became somewhat of an internet celebrity for being the tinniest bastard to grace the Earth.

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So the lessons we can learn from this are:

Some people, through no doing of their own, are just plain lucky,
If you stick around these people for too long you will have a mischief,
Luck eventually runs out for all of us.

Enjoy the week lads.​
 
Bob, I already know about boobs

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Barrybran said:
I'm going to start an expansion team called the United Northern Terriers. They will be based in the forest area of Sweet.

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When we play the Old Boys we shall ask but one question. Are you an OOB man or an UNT man?
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Well the more teams we have in the Sweet FA the merrier i say.

Any potential new franchise has my support unless they plan on having black and white stripes as their colours and calling themselves Magpies.:laughv1:
 

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Irish BlueBagger said:
Well the more teams we have in the Sweet FA the merrier i say.

Any potential new franchise has my support unless they plan on having black and white stripes as their colours and calling themselves Magpies.:laughv1:
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And this is what you got out of his post?

I am just so torn as I can't answer his question.
 
Irish BlueBagger said:
Well the more teams we have in the Sweet FA the merrier i say.

Any potential new franchise has my support unless they plan on having black and white stripes as their colours and calling themselves Magpies.:laughv1:
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What's the bigger rivalry - Carlton/Collingwood or Cork/Kerry?
 
U2tigers said:
And this is what you got out of his post?

I am just so torn as I can't answer his question.
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I'm disappointed he went with merrier rather than terrier
 
Tonga Bob said:
What's the bigger rivalry - Carlton/Collingwood or Cork/Kerry?
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It would be 50/50 i'd say. Bit of a difference in terms of all Irelands won though.

Kerry with 38 of them in the gaelic footy and Cork with just the 7 titles.
 
U2tigers said:
And this is what you got out of his post?

I am just so torn as I can't answer his question.
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It's a nice logo mate. Not as nice as ours but still.
 
Irish BlueBagger said:
It would be 50/50 i'd say. Bit of a difference in terms of all Irelands won though.

Kerry with 38 of them in the gaelic footy and Cork with just the 7 titles.
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Oof that's quite the imbalance! I thought that Cork was the bigger county as well.

And TIL that my county of origin Kilkenny (because everyone apparently has a bit of Irish in them) doesn't even compete in the All Ireland footy.
 
Tonga Bob said:
Oof that's quite the imbalance! I thought that Cork was the bigger county as well.

And TIL that my county of origin Kilkenny (because everyone apparently has a bit of Irish in them) doesn't even compete in the All Ireland footy.
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Hurling is way more popular than the gaelic footy in Cork. Dublin with 31 titles are the only team to come anyway close to Kerry, then you have Galway in third with 9 titles and Cork and Meath in joint fourth place with their 7 titles.

Kilkenny, Cork and Tipperary would be the three main historical superpowers in hurling although Limerick have been more dominant in recent years.
 

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Official Match Thread Season 38, Round 4: Ophidian Old Boys v Coney Island Warriors @ Spotswood Oval

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