Little things you do just to be a dick

[Igloo]

It's not that bad is it?

If you have no soul, sure, it's not that bad.

 

[Holy Foley!]

Well I do have red hair.

 

[Papa Juggs]

I broke a jar of something in the supermarket and just left it there.

I didn't buy what I broke

 

[BALKAN]

Knock on toilet cubicle doors.

 

[beez]

I give disconcerting looks and casually throw in an eye roll to those who walk on the right side of the footpath.

 

[chargers 09]

Shit in the shower then stomp it down the drain.

 

[chargers 09]

- Don't wash my hands at the toilet then go to Coles and handle fruit & veg.
- Take up 2 parking spaces.
- Make Subway employees dice my tomatoes.
- Pat girls on the head.
- Bark at dogs in public until they flip out and start barking back, then laugh as their owners scold them.

When I was on my way walking to school, I used to smash the metal fences really loud so all the dogs in a 500 metre radius would start howling.

 

[Xtreme]

Call people 'champ'

I learned that this was a bad thing on bigfooty a few months ago. It comes in handy in real life situations... especially in customer service (get served by a tosser at a register they get a "thanks champ" etc ).

Push the little silver button at a pedestrian crossing when I am clear to cross so that the light sequence will change and cars will have to stop after I'm gone.

I do this regularly

 

[Doss]

When there is clearly a row of parked cars in the left lane, traffic is banked up and people still insist on trying to sneak that all important two spots ahead and push in...

I'm proud to say I make every effort not to let them in when they do that.

 

[DrVanNostrand]

I go around pricking people with pins.

 

[Yellow Feathers]

Halfway through a light-hearted convo with someone, like a workmate at the pub for example, I put a concerned look on my face and ask in a condescending tone:

"Seriously mate, what are you doing with your life?"

Rattles them every time. I just love how their whole expression changes as their mind races to consider where it all went wrong...

 

[Quinz]

I like hearing a story from someone, and then as soon as I see them again in a group situation repeating the story to everyone as if it's mine. Just to see the reactions.

Also deliberately being unhelpful when people can't recall something is always amusing. Just guessing as if you're trying to help but actually don't care.

 

[Quivorir]

I like hearing a story from someone, and then as soon as I see them again in a group situation repeating the story to everyone as if it's mine. Just to see the reactions.

Got a mate that does that. Although he is not being an arseh*le. He genuinely believe it was him in the story.

 

[Scotland]

A good fun game is to start arguing with someone on a particular issue (politics, religion, gay marriage etc.) then half way through start arguing their side instead of your own.

If you can pull off a subtle, seamless transition without them clicking it will drive them insane.

 

[Druitt Soldier]

i like to try and send a fax to someone at works regular phone so that it will ring again and again and again hanging up everytime they answer

 

[Quokka]

When there is clearly a row of parked cars in the left lane, traffic is banked up and people still insist on trying to sneak that all important two spots ahead and push in...

I'm proud to say I make every effort not to let them in when they do that.

In the same vein, merging traffic, I'm usually happy enough to let the car beside me go first and then pull in behind them but if you're behind that car and try to push through to gain one more spot I'll put both of us in a ditch before letting that happen.

 

[getthefooty]

Like to mess with people... if I'm meeting someone/ a group for the first time often I'll chuck in 'you know, Sunkist is actually from the same company as Fanta' or something else that's pretty obviously wrong just to see if they correct me or not. Love watching their faces, clearly dying to correct me but a lot will just say 'oh really?!' or 'is it?', dunno why but it amuses me.

Also, often say to a mate 'so looking forward to xxxx's party on the weekend?' or 'you get an invite to xxxx's?' when there is no actual party and said mate is quite close to the person I made up. Always say 'na...' and then 'doesn't bother me actually' but you can tell it cuts really deep.

 

[RedmanWasHere]

Ask for specifics to show an aspect of my disability.

Can be used to my advantage.

 

[UmpiringFooty]

As a prank between one of my cousins and myself I record and then send him some fart mms's that he opens up occassionally whilst in the staffroom at his work. (he's an english and music teacher). The looks he gets from his workmates are apparently priceless!
He often opens these messages up at home and the family think that he's actually farted.

 

[Quivorir]

As a prank between one of my cousins and myself I record and then send him some fart mms's that he opens up occassionally whilst in the staffroom at his work. (he's an english and music teacher). The looks he gets from his workmates are apparently priceless!
He often opens these messages up at home and the family think that he's actually farted.

Brad or Chris?

Can imagine Brad would get quite angry where as Chris would just lie in the fetal position in a corner sobbing your name.

 

[SugarShane]

Thought of another one at work. Whenever there's a 2 page invoice our accounts lady always wants the second page on top because it has the totals on it. So of course i always make sure to staple them the other way around. It says page 1 of 2 so i'm making it page 1 of 2.

 

[UmpiringFooty]

Brad or Chris?

Can imagine Brad would get quite angry where as Chris would just lie in the fetal position in a corner sobbing your name.

Not those guys. Somebody on my mum's side of the family.

 

[JUBJUB]

Brad or Chris?

Can imagine Brad would get quite angry where as Chris would just lie in the fetal position in a corner sobbing your name.

"Oh no,Suzi pranked me again"




"She did what to you Brad ?"

 

[UmpiringFooty]

"Oh no,Suzi pranked me again"




"She did what to you Brad ?"

Learn to read

 

[SwampCreature]

I am a goal umpire and I take bribes to favour some teams.