Potential North themed content for Netflix

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BACKLASH
When AFL Coach David Noble (JK Simmons) delivers an epic spray to his North Melbourne Players after a humiliating defeat in Brisbane, several of them question their choice in occupation. Can the clubs administration lead by Ben Amarfio (Idris Elba) and Dr Sonja Hood (Rachel Weisz) help to steady a disastrous start to the season?

There's a post credit scene showing Clarko (Ryan Gosling)
Chef’s kiss casting
 

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FORGETTING JASON HORNE-FRANCIS

When star draftee JHF (Jesse Plemons) ends his relationship with the nice guy club who drafted him for a sleazy organisation with delusions of grandeur - who he has been cheating with - little does he know the grass isn’t always greener on the other oval. By the time the ugly character of his new flame is revealed, his old team have already moved on to handsome free-spirit George Wardlaw (played by himself).

A feel good comedy with numerous scene stealing cameos by the likes of Paul Rudd (Eddie Ford) and Jason Segal (Tristan Xerri).

Judd Apatow produces.


Jesse Plemons, great call!
 
Not sure of the movie but I have the characters all set out.
  • Wayne Carey: Chris Hemsworth – Chosen for his charisma and physicality, capturing Carey’s complex persona.
  • Antony Stevens: Sam Worthington – His intensity and emotional depth make him ideal for the role of a betrayed friend and determined athlete.
  • Glen Archer: Joel Edgerton – Bringing a grounded and loyal presence to the role, embodying the steadfast friend and teammate.
  • Denis Pagan: Bryan Brown – As the wise, tough, and experienced coach, Brown brings gravitas and authority to the role.
  • Kelli Stevens: Margot Robbie – Portraying the conflicted and remorseful Kelli with her nuanced acting skills.
 
THE DEEP

After a spate of local boats go mysteriously missing, and a giant supertanker reports being "attacked" by an enormous unknown sea creature, the authorities turn to grizzled ex North Melbourne midfielder Ben Cunnington to find and identify the threat.

Venturing out into the freezing waters of the Southern Ocean, Cunnington quickly ascertains - by talking to whales, which he can obviously do - the creature is not organic, but a machine, piloted by non other than his mortal lifelong enemy, that mastermind of evil Bernie Vince. Suitable for all ages.
 
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Not sure of the movie but I have the characters all set out.
  • Wayne Carey: Chris Hemsworth – Chosen for his charisma and physicality, capturing Carey’s complex persona.
  • Antony Stevens: Sam Worthington – His intensity and emotional depth make him ideal for the role of a betrayed friend and determined athlete.
  • Glen Archer: Joel Edgerton – Bringing a grounded and loyal presence to the role, embodying the steadfast friend and teammate.
  • Denis Pagan: Bryan Brown – As the wise, tough, and experienced coach, Brown brings gravitas and authority to the role.
  • Kelli Stevens: Margot Robbie – Portraying the conflicted and remorseful Kelli with her nuanced acting skills.

Just a big budget mini series: I KNOW WHAT YOU DID IN THE DUNNY
 
Not sure of the movie but I have the characters all set out.
  • Wayne Carey: Chris Hemsworth – Chosen for his charisma and physicality, capturing Carey’s complex persona.
  • Antony Stevens: Sam Worthington – His intensity and emotional depth make him ideal for the role of a betrayed friend and determined athlete.
  • Glen Archer: Joel Edgerton – Bringing a grounded and loyal presence to the role, embodying the steadfast friend and teammate.
  • Denis Pagan: Bryan Brown – As the wise, tough, and experienced coach, Brown brings gravitas and authority to the role.
  • Kelli Stevens: Margot Robbie – Portraying the conflicted and remorseful Kelli with her nuanced acting skills.
“Based on a true Story”, Rising junior Superstar 6 ft 4 centre half forward River Stevens grows up believing he is destined to follow in his father’s footsteps to lead the Shinboners to September Glory. Father Anthony though begins to have doubts River is his son, and secretly arranges a DNA test only to discover River’s biological father is James Hird. A legal battle follows with clubs staking their father/son claims. Essendon win the legal battle but not the war, with River turning his back on an AFL career in favour of being a sheep farmer and playing country footy rather than playing for Bard Scott and the injectors. 10 years later, the NMFC continue to battle, while River has struggles of his own with drought and a string of broken relationships, a chance encounter with an elderly Denis Pagan at the Royal Mail Hotel in Mooroopna, sparks River to nominate for the draft, where he is taken with a late speculative pick by NMFC…….cue Rocky style “getting stronger” scenes or River running on the farm, splitting wood, throwing hay bales etc for training….onto footy, is the Tom Cruise style Top Gun/Days of Thunder rocky road to eventual success and premiership.
 
“Based on a true Story”, Rising junior Superstar 6 ft 4 centre half forward River Stevens grows up believing he is destined to follow in his father’s footsteps to lead the Shinboners to September Glory. Father Anthony though begins to have doubts River is his son, and secretly arranges a DNA test only to discover River’s biological father is James Hird. A legal battle follows with clubs staking their father/son claims. Essendon win the legal battle but not the war, with River turning his back on an AFL career in favour of being a sheep farmer and playing country footy rather than playing for Bard Scott and the injectors. 10 years later, the NMFC continue to battle, while River has struggles of his own with drought and a string of broken relationships, a chance encounter with an elderly Denis Pagan at the Royal Mail Hotel in Mooroopna, sparks River to nominate for the draft, where he is taken with a late speculative pick by NMFC…….cue Rocky style “getting stronger” scenes or River running on the farm, splitting wood, throwing hay bales etc for training….onto footy, is the Tom Cruise style Top Gun/Days of Thunder rocky road to eventual success and premiership.
Working title: A River Runs Through It
 
Working title: A River Runs Through It

Soundtrack:
When River Runs Dry (Hunters and Collectors)
Bow River (Cold Chisel)
Cry me a River
Moon River
Big River (Johnny Cash)
Wide River (Steve Miller Band)
Take me to the River (Al Green)
The River (Bruce Springsteen)
And of course Proud Mary (Creedence Clearwater Revival)…..”Rolling, rolling on the river…”
 
All these sound like the could be nice movies, but why not go for an epic TV series in the vein of Game Of Thrones where the smaller North Melbourne Football Club take on and destroy the Victorian larger football clubs in a battle to become the premier club of Victoria. Intrigue, scandal, takeovers, backstabbing, and sabotage all ensue and at the end, the Roo's come out victorious and the Blues, Bombers and Pies become a footnote in history.
 
I can never not see him as anyone else.

I can

Jameson-1.jpg
 

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ALMOST FAMOUS: The Curtis Taylor Story

A young man with dreams of becoming an A-List celebrity goes undercover at a struggling professional football club to network. Despite feigning his way through training and gym work he finds his way into the first team and faces the tough decision of choosing between his teammates or the lure of a superficial existence. Stars Jason Biggs (Curtis Taylor) and Brooke Satchwell (his foxy mother). Directed by Cameron Crowe.
 
Robo's Basilisk

Follow's the story of a young, sober, good looking footy journo (Robo) who makes a deal with the devil shapeshifting in the form of Gil McLaughlin (played by Nick cave reprising his role in ghosts of the civil dead) and Craig Hutchinson (played by a rotting piece of whale blubber washed up on a beach.) Charts the rise of an subservient, lickspittle AFL media culture that punishes anyone who tries to prevent its rise with eternal torture ie freezing them out of the 24 hour AFL media loop. Their only chance to return is to submit to a velour tracksuited Hutchy playing the Dom and his puppy Dammo, clad in purple latex, in a dingy, kinky dungeon under AFL House while the Devil and other AFL execs watch on and call out various humiliating punishments.

Robo's rise to the top mirror's his personal fall into corruption, alcoholism and incoherence as he compromises his integrity in greater and more soul destroying ways while his footy team repeatedly fails to win a final. All the while in the background actual footy happens and charts the fall of North from mediocrity to the hell of the early 20s before their inevitable rise to become one of or the greatest side in AFL history winning five flags from 2026 - 2033.

The final scene shows Robo on a life ending bender as he drinks himself to oblivion after learning of the replacement of the entire AFL media sector by AI chatbots. On the TV North put Essendon* out of yet another elimination final in a loss that will condemn them to 10,000 days without a final win. Robo's life ebbs away after he falls from his stool and cracks his head on a smelly, tiled piss trough under the bar he was drinking at. He lies on the ground, life ebbing away trying unsuccessfully to say the words "I am no mouthpiece and I must scream."
 
RoCo's unBasilisk

A companion piece to Robo's Basilsk, this short half hour show charts the career and life of RoCo, another AFL journo and Essendon* supporter who can't bring himself to submit to the Basilisk. RoCo carves out a career online writing quality independent analysis of the AFL as a competition and as an organisation while generating a modest income that way and working hard in the rest of life. It also ends with the same final that sees Robo fall to his death. RoCo, while disappointed, is resilient and puts together another quality analysis of the game, his sides ongoing failings and the glory that is North Melbourne. As the scene cuts away from RoCo we see his lovely wife and happy kids playing in the sun in a beautiful suburban garden somewhere.
 
Robo's Basilisk

Follow's the story of a young, sober, good looking footy journo (Robo) who makes a deal with the devil shapeshifting in the form of Gil McLaughlin (played by Nick cave reprising his role in ghosts of the civil dead) and Craig Hutchinson (played by a rotting piece of whale blubber washed up on a beach.) Charts the rise of an subservient, lickspittle AFL media culture that punishes anyone who tries to prevent its rise with eternal torture ie freezing them out of the 24 hour AFL media loop. Their only chance to return is to submit to a velour tracksuited Hutchy playing the Dom and his puppy Dammo, clad in purple latex, in a dingy, kinky dungeon under AFL House while the Devil and other AFL execs watch on and call out various humiliating punishments.

Robo's rise to the top mirror's his personal fall into corruption, alcoholism and incoherence as he compromises his integrity in greater and more soul destroying ways while his footy team repeatedly fails to win a final. All the while in the background actual footy happens and charts the fall of North from mediocrity to the hell of the early 20s before their inevitable rise to become one of or the greatest side in AFL history winning five flags from 2026 - 2033.

The final scene shows Robo on a life ending bender as he drinks himself to oblivion after learning of the replacement of the entire AFL media sector by AI chatbots. On the TV North put Essendon* out of yet another elimination final in a loss that will condemn them to 10,000 days without a final win. Robo's life ebbs away after he falls from his stool and cracks his head on a smelly, tiled piss trough under the bar he was drinking at. He lies on the ground, life ebbing away trying unsuccessfully to say the words "I am no mouthpiece and I must scream."
Epic 👏🏻
 
Orange is the new Blue

A football club sets out to reinvent itself by introducing a splash of orange in to its guernsey only to see season upon season of calamities unfold.




Curb your enthusiasm

Follow Brad Scott as he weekly attempts an easy fix to any number of complex problems, whilst at the same time setting up the Club for half a decade of performance pain.



Don’t **** with Cats

Relive the night a football team kicks 1 goal.



Stranger Things

In this ground breaking documentary, relive the critical moments of when a 50 metre was not paid.
 
All these sound like the could be nice movies, but why not go for an epic TV series in the vein of Game Of Thrones where the smaller North Melbourne Football Club take on and destroy the Victorian larger football clubs in a battle to become the premier club of Victoria. Intrigue, scandal, takeovers, backstabbing, and sabotage all ensue and at the end, the Roo's come out victorious and the Blues, Bombers and Pies become a footnote in history.
Happy Game Of Thrones GIF

Only if this guy plays Clarko!
 
Robo's Basilisk

Follow's the story of a young, sober, good looking footy journo (Robo) who makes a deal with the devil shapeshifting in the form of Gil McLaughlin (played by Nick cave reprising his role in ghosts of the civil dead) and Craig Hutchinson (played by a rotting piece of whale blubber washed up on a beach.) Charts the rise of an subservient, lickspittle AFL media culture that punishes anyone who tries to prevent its rise with eternal torture ie freezing them out of the 24 hour AFL media loop. Their only chance to return is to submit to a velour tracksuited Hutchy playing the Dom and his puppy Dammo, clad in purple latex, in a dingy, kinky dungeon under AFL House while the Devil and other AFL execs watch on and call out various humiliating punishments.

Robo's rise to the top mirror's his personal fall into corruption, alcoholism and incoherence as he compromises his integrity in greater and more soul destroying ways while his footy team repeatedly fails to win a final. All the while in the background actual footy happens and charts the fall of North from mediocrity to the hell of the early 20s before their inevitable rise to become one of or the greatest side in AFL history winning five flags from 2026 - 2033.

The final scene shows Robo on a life ending bender as he drinks himself to oblivion after learning of the replacement of the entire AFL media sector by AI chatbots. On the TV North put Essendon* out of yet another elimination final in a loss that will condemn them to 10,000 days without a final win. Robo's life ebbs away after he falls from his stool and cracks his head on a smelly, tiled piss trough under the bar he was drinking at. He lies on the ground, life ebbing away trying unsuccessfully to say the words "I am no mouthpiece and I must scream."

Majestic stuff
 
Robo's Basilisk

Follow's the story of a young, sober, good looking footy journo (Robo) who makes a deal with the devil shapeshifting in the form of Gil McLaughlin (played by Nick cave reprising his role in ghosts of the civil dead) and Craig Hutchinson (played by a rotting piece of whale blubber washed up on a beach.) Charts the rise of an subservient, lickspittle AFL media culture that punishes anyone who tries to prevent its rise with eternal torture ie freezing them out of the 24 hour AFL media loop. Their only chance to return is to submit to a velour tracksuited Hutchy playing the Dom and his puppy Dammo, clad in purple latex, in a dingy, kinky dungeon under AFL House while the Devil and other AFL execs watch on and call out various humiliating punishments.

Robo's rise to the top mirror's his personal fall into corruption, alcoholism and incoherence as he compromises his integrity in greater and more soul destroying ways while his footy team repeatedly fails to win a final. All the while in the background actual footy happens and charts the fall of North from mediocrity to the hell of the early 20s before their inevitable rise to become one of or the greatest side in AFL history winning five flags from 2026 - 2033.

The final scene shows Robo on a life ending bender as he drinks himself to oblivion after learning of the replacement of the entire AFL media sector by AI chatbots. On the TV North put Essendon* out of yet another elimination final in a loss that will condemn them to 10,000 days without a final win. Robo's life ebbs away after he falls from his stool and cracks his head on a smelly, tiled piss trough under the bar he was drinking at. He lies on the ground, life ebbing away trying unsuccessfully to say the words "I am no mouthpiece and I must scream."
Impressive.

Is Alejandro Jodorowsky still alive? If so, can we convince him to abandon retirement to make this his swansong?

Feel like this has got serious El Topo / Holy Mountain energy.
 
KANGAS UNDERCOVER

Screwball comedy following the adventures of a group of North board BigFooty posters who buy Essendon memberships with a view to taking over the club and rapidly running it into the ground.

Mentored by Julian Assange, the lovable lunks convince an imbecilic Essendon supporter with frosted blonde tips, acid wash jeans, big complicated chunky Reeboks bought from Sims Sports on Puckle Street and one of those hideous pleather letterman jackets (Gyton Grantley) to be their patsy and stand for the board ... with hilarious and unexpected results.

Villain played a tiny blackhearted North supporter (Jonah Hill) jealous of the gang and their winning ways, who conspires with Essendon supporters and a journalist to try bring down the merrry band of rogues and their madcap scheme ... but don't worry, this dorkus malorkus maximus gets their comeuppance in the end
.
 
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Microsoft Copilot has actually come back with some pretty decent suggestions.

  1. “THE SHADOW COACH”: A psychological thriller where a mysterious figure (Cillian Murphy) infiltrates the coaching staff. His unorthodox methods yield results, but players start disappearing. Is he a savior or a malevolent force? The tension builds as secrets unravel, and the club’s soul hangs in the balance.
  2. “THE CURSED JUMPER”: When a rookie dons an old North Melbourne guernsey, strange occurrences follow. Players suffer freak injuries, and opponents mysteriously falter. As the team rises in the ladder, the price becomes clear: success demands a sacrifice. A chilling exploration of ambition and dark magic.
  3. “THE LOCKER ROOM”: A claustrophobic horror series set entirely within the club’s locker room. Players experience vivid nightmares, and their fears manifest physically. The room itself seems to feed on their anxieties. Can they escape its grip, or will it consume them one by one?

Randolph, if you’re reading this, I would happily watch any of those.
 
WHEN IRISH EYES ARE DYING

The club can't believe it's luck when a GAA twin brother/sister superstar duo The O'Shaughnessys announce their intention to head Down Under to play for the mighty Kangaroos.

After making explosive debuts and winning the hearts - literally, both Irish players quickly strike up passionate romances with teammates from the opposite squad - of the club, disaster looms when it is revealed the O'Shaughnessy have fled Ireland after Sean O'Shaughnessy ran up a massive gambling debt with serious Dublin gangland figures, and obviously his sister Siobhan O'Shaughnessy wasn't leaving him to face the music himself.

Senior players decide that One Club means One Club, and a crack squad of players forms to take on the Dublin gangsters, no matter what price must be paid. The scene where Emma Kearney tortures the location of the gangster safehouse out of a captured henchman immediately enters cinema lore
 

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Potential North themed content for Netflix

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