dogs105
Sweet Kennels Proprietor
Lo
A good thing?
Oh, a thing.View attachment 1872846
…and then she said “yeah but it ate my popcorn!”
[from side of stage] Bob, you’re on.
Oh crap.
Welcome everybody, I trust this beez night finds you. Kennedy Parker your swansong is going off like an improvised explosive camel in the Baghdadi bazaar. beez night is the night where we reveal the posters that we as a community enjoyed, appreciated and yes, loved over the course of the season just gone. It is the yin of Sweet.
It’s time though to talk about the yang. The Le Grille-gym4life Award.
Now in its eighth course, the Le Grille-gym4life Award is the brainchild of NaturalDisaster who, in season 27, first shone a torch on the corners of Sweet that were uncontaminated by beez votes. Or sanitation. To quote from the eligibility criteria: “It's the award for people to both have a match thread posting average at least 25 per week and have received zero points from the beez voting community.”
It's named after two SFA posters of yore who were experts at talking into the void – Le Grille who went voteless in season 23 despite averaging more than 100 posts a week and gym4life who had zero votes in season 26 despite having an active season.
The inaugural winner was cooney in season 27, nobody was crap enough in season 28 to give it to, it fell under the couch and was forgotten in season 29 before being found along with a honey roasted peanut the following season. The winners from season 30 onwards have been Matt_352, Cap, Rioli8217, CatToTheFuture, Soggy2112 and finally kickthething last season.
This is all well and good, but surely there's something in it for the winners apart from niche online infamy? Well sure there is, it wouldn't be a shonky online award without a shonky online trophy. And the winner of the Le Grille-gym4life Award picks up an absolute stonker - The Golden Shittruck!
In a sign that says both that activity is up and that quantity does not always equal quality, we had eight posters that met the eligibility requirements this season. Not quite the lofty heights of nine from season 32, but still enough for me to talk for longer than most of you want me to.
And now to the results.
Starting with those that were eligible but didn’t make the top five we have the Richard Kingsmill of Coney Island Purple7x08_24 in 8th place on 25.07 posts per week, the loveable yet dim-witted Manx cat from the East Side [INSERT NAME HERE] MP_ in 7th place on 26.71 PPW and the optimistically-named Bomber SaintsSeptember in 6th place on 30.71 PPW.
In fifth place this season on 33 posts per week is Mop from the Gumbies who, let’s be honest, would give zero sh*ts for not getting any votes as he’s a premiership player.
In fourth place is a player that not only received nil votes but gets a 404 Not Found error when you click on his name in SweetFA+. With 37.71 PPW it’s Irish BlueBagger, an active rookie from the Ophidian Old Boys that wasn’t stolen from another club which is as rare as rocking horse poo.
We’re at the pointy end now, and we have a tie for second place! Wonders ornament ClarkeM and Delon supporting actor moginie both posted exactly 600 times in season 36, giving them an average of 42.86 PPW.
And so to the winner, who averaged a whopping 55.21 posts into the void yet had a median PPW of only 8. Why does that matter? Just ask this statistician:
An average is when you get all of the posts for the season into a bucket and then sprinkle them across the season so that every round gets the same amount of posts, like you’re giving out 14 participation awards but not declaring a winner. A median on the other hand is when you line up all of the rounds against a wall based on how tall they are, and then you shoot all but the round in the middle.
I use averages instead of medians for the Le Grille-gym4life Award because you shouldn’t get to hide from the Golden Shittruck just because you chose a couple of rounds to stink it up instead of the whole season. Indeed, this sort of practice should be spotlighted or as a wise man once said: “The more you f*ck around, the more you’re gonna find out”. I also use averages instead of medians because I’m mean.
Our winner posted 60.54% of their total match thread posts in one round – a round 4 encounter vs the Hill People where 468 posts were dropped in a week. To put this in context, he posted more in one week than 78.91% of all listed players in the SFA posted in the whole season!
So without any further ado, please charge your glasses and join me in congratulating dogs105 from the West Coast Revolving Doors on winning the Le Grille-gym4life Award for season 36! Mazel tov buddy, here's your miniature novelty Golden Shittruck trophy!
View attachment 1872849
A good thing?
