Analysis Whipping Boys - 2022 edition

[leon123]

Good point. There's some great potential:

"Stag put four holes in his mother******* head"

Definitely the kind of thing we want our blokes to be emulating.

But there's great danger in Nick Cave too:

He’ll wrap you in his arms,
 tell you that you’ve been a good boy
He’ll rekindle all those dreams 
it took you a lifetime to destroy
He’ll reach deep into the hole,
 heal your shrinking soul

"Wrap you in his arms" "you've been a good boy" "rekindle all those dreams" "Shrinking soul" * that s**t. He's basically telling our blokes to lie down with a needle in their arm, sulking.

The full lyrics of Caves' version of Stagger Lee would scare the kiddies, Oliver Henry and even give nightmares to Maynard

 

[sr36]

The full lyrics of Caves' version of Stagger Lee would scare the kiddies, Oliver Henry and even give nightmares to Maynard

That was just Nick's biblical upbringing shining through.

 

[Cyclops]

Nick Cave is as tough as a CWA sponge cake. Harden up fellas and if in doubt, look to Bon.

I have a feeling [pick 16] will be a whipping boy, as a first rounder and compared to other recent picks like Ginni and the Daicoi.

 

[leon123]

Nick Cave is as tough as a CWA sponge cake. Harden up fellas and if in doubt, look to Bon.

I have a feeling [pick 16] will be a whipping boy, as a first rounder and compared to other recent picks like Ginni and the Daicoi.

nah

 

[sr36]

Nick Cave is as tough as a CWA sponge cake. Harden up fellas and if in doubt, look to Bon.

I have a feeling [pick 16] will be a whipping boy, as a first rounder and compared to other recent picks like Ginni and the Daicoi.

"fellas" What the **** is that s doing at the end. You better not be referring to me. Don't you mean harden the **** up Leon.

There's so many potential potholes that could destroy our premiership chances: Nick Cave, The Smiths, One Direction, K Pop... The list just goes on and on. We've just got to hope that the club has learnt their lesson and stays on top of it. I'd be playing it safe: Chisels, Gunners, Acker Dacker ...

FU

 

[Markfs]

Did someone forget to put the trash out?

If you want my opinion of nick cave - which you dont - is that nick is all talk and no action. He's got the voice for it and then you see him and he looks like a bloke on his last legs. If you could somehow morph his talk into will kelly

20

Will Kelly

Age

24

Ht

194cm

Wt

92kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

5.0

1star

K

4.0

2star

HB

1.0

1star

M

2.0

2star

T

0.0

1star

MG

108.0

2star

D

5.0

1star

K

4.0

1star

HB

1.0

1star

M

2.0

2star

T

0.0

1star

MG

108.0

2star

D

5.0

1star

K

4.0

2star

HB

1.0

2star

M

2.0

3star

T

0.0

1star

MG

108.0

2star

's body, we might end up with a decent VFL player

 

[leon123]

Did someone forget to put the trash out?

If you want my opinion of nick cave - which you dont - is that nick is all talk and no action. He's got the voice for it and then you see him and he looks like a bloke on his last legs. If you could somehow morph his talk into will kelly's body, we might end up with a decent VFL player

reminds me a bit of Caleb Poulter... I guess his AFL career didn't end well, so you have a good point

 

[Markfs]

View attachment 1544780

reminds me a bit of Caleb Poulter... I guess his AFL career didn't end well, so you have a good point

nice doppelganger spot..

 

[Markfs]

i was looking for a compromise candidate rock star for the new age Magpies, I thought this might be appropriate....it meets the AFLW requirements and it is also non-violent....

 

[sr36]

i was looking for a compromise candidate rock star for the new age Magpies, I thought this might be appropriate....it meets the AFLW requirements and it is also non-violent....

This might be suited to our men's team.

 

[leon123]

i was looking for a compromise candidate rock star for the new age Magpies, I thought this might be appropriate....it meets the AFLW requirements and it is also non-violent....

mmmm, dont know, with songs like "heart of glass" doesnt inspire toughness

 

[Markfs]

ok fellas.....you're a tough audience....here's my last suggestion...take note of how debbie says "two". It's a secret weapon

we could change the lyrics to "millane 42"

 

[Markfs]

This might be suited to our men's team.

pleaseeeeee nooooooo!...omg we're not running a woke holiday camp

 

[Markfs]

mmmm, dont know, with songs like "heart of glass" doesnt inspire toughness

i'm thinking of inspiring testosterone...

 

[sr36]

ok fellas.....you're a tough audience....here's my last suggestion...take note of how debbie says "two". It's a secret weapon

we could change the lyrics to "millane 42"

Promising.

I like this: The opening even sounds like some moron coach, which is what we're looking for in a coach - someone who can connect with moron players:

 

[Markfs]

Promising.

I like this: The opening even sounds like some moron coach, which is what we're looking for in a coach - someone who can connect with moron players:

You know....how can I put this..... you are rather weird...

 

[sr36]

You know....how can I put this..... you are rather weird...

It's quite simple really, bikini girls and machine guns symbolise the two concepts that produce mongrel and drive footballers to flags. It's science.

 

[Markfs]

It's quite simple really, bikini girls and machine guns symbolise the two concepts that produce mongrel and drive footballers to flags. It's science.

all i know is that debbie in fishnets motivates me....

 

[Cyclops]

Great to see the Debster ITT. Mate of mine played the Falls the year she was heading the bill (1990's?), saw her swanning around backstage: screwed up his courage to the sticking place and said "g'day", and she gave him the sweetest smile, at 50+ years old still a stunner.

nah

Still tougher than Cavie-Wavie.

"fellas" What the * is that s doing at the end. You better not be referring to me. Don't you mean harden the * up Leon.

I mean harden the **** up EVERYBODY. We need a whipping boy and none of us are up to it. We need a player with the disposal skills of a Jamie "Apples" Turner, the finesse of Jason Wild, the Heart of a Jesse White, the jaw of a Cam Cloke, the arm-raising ability of a Stunning Steve McKey, and the hyphenation of WHE.

What are the recruiters doing? Where's our Capro Espiatorio, every great side has one.

 

[sr36]

I mean harden the **** up EVERYBODY. We need a whipping boy and none of us are up to it. We need a player with the disposal skills of a Jamie "Apples" Turner, the finesse of Jason Wild, the Heart of a Jesse White, the jaw of a Cam Cloke, the arm-raising ability of a Stunning Steve McKey, and the hyphenation of WHE.

Those qualities are easy. I've got all of those qualities. And we all know how good Dekka is at finding them. But ****ing GW and Fly don't look like they want to play along and keep them on the list and then pick them. We might have to stick to whipping Johnny Noble for his physical unpleasantness.

 

[Markfs]

one thing is for sure..... we wont be short of players to put the slipper into

 

[sr36]

one thing is for sure..... we wont be short of players to put the slipper into

I'm backing us to find fault no matter how small and really thrash hard for the betterment of the club.

 

[Markfs]

I'm backing us to find fault no matter how small and really thrash hard for the betterment of the club.

i think next year might be more difficult....lots of opportunities to vent... we may clear out some trash

 

[Timmy from Thomastown]

I’m backing in Mason Cox

46

Mason Cox

Age

33

Ht

211cm

Wt

110kg

Pos.

F/R

Career

Season

Last 5

D

8.7

2star

K

5.2

2star

HB

3.5

3star

M

4.0

4star

T

1.6

4star

G

1.2

4star

D

6.0

1star

K

3.0

1star

HB

3.0

2star

M

2.3

2star

T

0.3

1star

G

1.0

4star

D

9.0

3star

K

5.4

2star

HB

3.6

3star

M

2.6

3star

T

2.4

4star

G

1.8

5star

to make a comeback in 2023.

He avoided the whips all year by adding consistency and credibility to his game.

 

[sr36]

i think next year might be more difficult....lots of opportunities to vent... we may clear out some trash

There's nothing like higher expectations to bring out the strap.

I can't wait until October 2023 - the highlight of every footy season when delistings show us the fruits of our labour.