Probably. I'm seeing her on Thursday for a chat, just going to be honest and leave it all out there. If she maintains her original point of view (likely) I won't contact her again.
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Family & Relationships How do you get over a girl?
- Thread starter frantelle
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Probably. I'm seeing her on Thursday for a chat, just going to be honest and leave it all out there. If she maintains her original point of view (likely) I won't contact her again.
- Sep 2, 2014
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It's such a weird romantic comedy notion of a statement though. I like you but can't bare to have my heart broken again. Then telling your friend she's excited to tell you that she likes you before telling you? If you hadn't had said 24 I would have guessed 16 years old.
Sorry bro, not trying to sound like a twat but I kind of am.
I've slept with sisters before (separately) and oddly they weren't at all bothered by it, freaked me out a bit actually. Was a couple of years apart though.
It does sound like that in isolation but it's behaviour that I haven't seen face to face yet so I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt. She probably just has a few demons from past relationships and is expressing that.
- Sep 2, 2014
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Good luck and god speed
- Sep 28, 2016
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If you're still around now how you travelling.
Probably married with 3 kids.
- May 5, 2006
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Sound advice, worthy of stickying in some collection of pieces of sound advice thread.
Women have a whole bunch of ways of saying no without saying no. 'Would you like to...?' should in theory elicit a yes or no response, but the majority of the time it will not. Why do they do it? Who knows. My theory is that trying to be nice makes them feel good about themselves which convinces them that the person on the other end is feeling likewise good.
Ever had this happen?
'I had a great time on Saturday, would you like to have a drink this weekend?'
'Hey. No thanks, I wish you well but I'm just not interested'
That girl is wife material. Not your wife, but she's a keeper.
This is a more realistic exchange:
'I had a great time on Saturday, would you like to have a drink this weekend?'
*longer than normal pause to respond*
'Hey <first name>, I had a great time too. <insert cliche(s)>'
The second part is the fun bit. Sometimes you'll get a compliment sandwich ('I had such a great time - some bullshit - you're a really great guy'), sometimes you'll get something dismissive ('I'll let you know/I'd love to buy I'm sooo busy at the moment'), sometimes you'll get creative nonsense ('Just not looking to date someone right now', yes that would explain why you are on every dating app) - but whichever fork in the road is presented still leads to a dead end.
When you are young and naive it you sort of take it personally and analyse it as best you can. Once you've seen the pattern of behaviour enough times you just recognise it and move on. Sure if you are 15 or 50 and think a girl actually likes you then she doesn't it still sucks, but if you spend hours agonising over every word and analysing what could/should be the reason and what you could have done etc. every time you'll end up in a padded room. See it for what it is and focus your energy elsewhere. Plenty of fish and all that.
- Jan 7, 2018
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Sounds like a sudden change of heart, maybe a mate has said something that has put her off you or the thought of being in a relationship again has scared her off.
I would go a week without contacting her and see if she contacts you again.
I did that a few weeks ago when I thought she wasn’t interested, and she ended up initiating something via text after 4 or 5 days. At the time I thought it worked beautifully, but I’ve since learned from her friends she thought that meant I didn’t like her and it might be a contributing factor as to why she ended it last week.
I’m seeing her tonight so will report back. Doubt she will change her mind but I at least get an opportunity to be honest with her. Rarely do you get the chance to be really honest with someone in a positive way, it’s quite powerful I reckon, so I’m excited even though I might be shattered afterwards.
- Sep 27, 2014
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I'm no Dr Phil (which is a good thing as he's really an arseh*le) but it seems a little odd you need to ask her friends and your friends to find out what a 24yo you've been seeing thinks of you.
- Sep 2, 2014
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Probably too late but for the love of all things human don't beg, try to convince her or negotiate (maybe we can catch up in a month and see where we're at?) about the "relationship".
Got to keep your pride.
Didn't really ask, just got told.
Think we're both probably a bit insecure, me because I've never managed to hold down a proper relationship, her because she's been burnt by one.
As well - it's difficult when you don't know the person at all before coming in. If they have been friends for ages and you sleep with each other, you know roughly where you stand. Either you enter a relationship or you know it was a once off. Meeting someone completely new though, there will always be that doubt in your mind because there isn't a 'body of work' to reference.
Yeah na all over that. If she essentially re-states her position, I wron't try and convince her otherwise.
I will probably have a jab at her for ending it via text though, really hate that shit.
Also, and there's no real way of saying this without sounding like a dickhead, but she's unbelievably attractive and objectively a long way out of my league, so that has added to my insecurity about things.
That's what happens when you play games. If you want to send a text, send it. These stupid 'tests' just wreck things.
Well it went about as well as could be expected despite it being over.
Think she just isn't quite over her previous relationship and it was a case of poor timing. Sounds like a cop out when I write it but I could see when I was there she was telling me the truth. Had genuine feelings for me but just wants to do her own thing for a bit.
She didn't realise that I liked her so it made it a bit tougher for her when I told her. Could see she was half regretting it and she said she might regret this down the track. We then almost had sex but then both stopped as it wouldn't have felt quite right.
We both left it on a good note, I basically said thanks for the 6 weeks, it was really fun, see ya later. Won't contact her again. Feeling so much better today than the past couple of weeks where thinking about her was inhibiting my daily life.
Cheers GD for assistance
Think she just isn't quite over her previous relationship and it was a case of poor timing. Sounds like a cop out when I write it but I could see when I was there she was telling me the truth. Had genuine feelings for me but just wants to do her own thing for a bit.
She didn't realise that I liked her so it made it a bit tougher for her when I told her. Could see she was half regretting it and she said she might regret this down the track. We then almost had sex but then both stopped as it wouldn't have felt quite right.
We both left it on a good note, I basically said thanks for the 6 weeks, it was really fun, see ya later. Won't contact her again. Feeling so much better today than the past couple of weeks where thinking about her was inhibiting my daily life.
Cheers GD for assistance
Smoooothy
SACK THE LOT OF THEM!
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that's probably as good as result as you could get in that scenario. bad luck, but more fish in the sea etc
- Sep 2, 2014
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Holllllllllllld on a second here. This has to be a troll.
Na that was what happened, probably said it a bit too matter of factly. There were clearly residual feelings from both ends and we had the chat on her bed in her room so it was probably bound to happen at some stage. Wasn't like we tore each other's clothes off, was just heading that way until we stopped it.
Lol
It was actually more me that stopped it, I don't think she would've gone through with it either though
In reality she had nothing to lose from one more time but it would've made it that much harder for me to move on
The sex we had was up there with the best I've ever had so it was simply a case of both wanting to enjoy something that was very fun one last time
- Sep 27, 2014
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I feel your pain mate, have had my heart broken 3 times over the last couple of years. However, not too long after my last breakup I found the love of my life, who I know will be the person I start a family with in the next couple of years. Keep persisting, the person for you is out there!
- Jun 16, 2018
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What are you, ten?
How can adult men allow their emotions to be so beholden to women?
How can you even develop feelings for women in such a short space of time that three can hurt you in two years?
Were you guys overly mothered? Or not mothered enough?
Either way, if you don't accept yourself for who you are as a man, every woman who sleeps with you will eventually 'break your heart'.
It's pathetic. You can be better.
