Underrated things in life

[rocker_oz33]

Calling BS here ..I can smell it .

 

[rocker_oz33]

I had baseball players in my team..
Rocket arms .
I wasn't very happy when they threw four over throws ...when I was bowling ..

 

[phantom13]

Weddings and funerals are about the most receptive audience you’ll ever find. People want to laugh or remember funny events. Just don’t go the shock comedy route too hard. No wife wants to hear about all the birds the groom shagged before her.

We went to a wedding once where the groom was a born again and the bride was a lifelong. Allllll the speeches (and there were ALOT) centered around how much pussy he’d hit and how she was chaste with the added “oh it’s going to be the greatest 12 seconds of your life” to the bride.

All the Bible bashers ****ing loved it, thought it was absolute peak comedy and the rest of us just found it weird to see the grooms dad using his sons mattress habits as comedy fodder.

 

[Cruyff14]

When one of your favourite songs comes up on shuffle on a playlist.

 

[Shell]

We went to a wedding once where the groom was a born again and the bride was a lifelong. Allllll the speeches (and there were ALOT) centered around how much pussy he’d hit and how she was chaste with the added “oh it’s going to be the greatest 12 seconds of your life” to the bride.

All the Bible bashers ******* loved it, thought it was absolute peak comedy and the rest of us just found it weird to see the grooms dad using his sons mattress habits as comedy fodder.

What did the bride think of all that?


*And alot of speeches at weddings can gagfd. One cousins wedding specifically comes to mind.
**And yet still doesn't even come close to what I experienced at our schools Xmas party this year

 

[MrsEddieBetts]

We went to a wedding once where the groom was a born again and the bride was a lifelong. Allllll the speeches (and there were ALOT) centered around how much pussy he’d hit and how she was chaste with the added “oh it’s going to be the greatest 12 seconds of your life” to the bride.

All the Bible bashers ******* loved it, thought it was absolute peak comedy and the rest of us just found it weird to see the grooms dad using his sons mattress habits as comedy fodder.

That’s feral

 

[nobbyiscool]

We went to a wedding once where the groom was a born again and the bride was a lifelong. Allllll the speeches (and there were ALOT) centered around how much pussy he’d hit and how she was chaste with the added “oh it’s going to be the greatest 12 seconds of your life” to the bride.

All the Bible bashers ******* loved it, thought it was absolute peak comedy and the rest of us just found it weird to see the grooms dad using his sons mattress habits as comedy fodder.

The best/worst speech I ever saw was a father of the bride. English was his second language anyway, he didn't speak it particularly well, and he fully blubbered through his whole speech. 25 minutes the prick spoke, I don't think I understood a word.

 

[phantom13]

What did the bride think of all that?


*And alot of speeches at weddings can gagfd. One cousins wedding specifically comes to mind.
**And yet still doesn't even come close to what I experienced at our schools Xmas party this year

She seemed to laugh it off albeit somewhat uncomfortably.

I think what made it worse is they didn’t just do speeches in one bunch, they were scattered throughout the evening. From memory there was bride, groom, grooms dad, grooms mum, brides dad, brides mum, maid of honor, best man, some random uncle and their priest/whatever. So the whole “she’s a virgin who is gonna get railed tonight” literally hung over the whole reception.

Also heaps of the speeches implied he was some sort of saint for abstaining for her as well.

It was just real cooked.

 

[Shell]

She seemed to laugh it off albeit somewhat uncomfortably.

I think what made it worse is they didn’t just do speeches in one bunch, they were scattered throughout the evening. From memory there was bride, groom, grooms dad, grooms mum, brides dad, brides mum, maid of honor, best man, some random uncle and their priest/whatever. So the whole “she’s a virgin who is gonna get railed tonight” literally hung over the whole reception.

Also heaps of the speeches implied he was some sort of saint for abstaining for her as well.

It was just real cooked.

I'm no prude, but I reckon I would have legit gotten up and walked out on that, if I was her.

 

[Shell]

She seemed to laugh it off albeit somewhat uncomfortably.

I think what made it worse is they didn’t just do speeches in one bunch, they were scattered throughout the evening. From memory there was bride, groom, grooms dad, grooms mum, brides dad, brides mum, maid of honor, best man, some random uncle and their priest/whatever. So the whole “she’s a virgin who is gonna get railed tonight” literally hung over the whole reception.

Also heaps of the speeches implied he was some sort of saint for abstaining for her as well.

It was just real cooked.

*and if it was my wedding.. which probably will never happen but anyway.. I'd have father of the bride, best man and maid of honor. That's it. No one else gets to speak.

 

[MrsEddieBetts]

I'm no prude, but I reckon I would have legit gotten up and walked out on that, if I was her.

I walked out of my cousin’s 21st because the speeches were so horrific and disrespectful. Obviously you expect a certain amount of ribbing but her friends had taken photos of quite a traumatic event for her and included them in a slideshow like it was a big joke.

 

[Shell]

I walked out of my cousin’s 21st because the speeches were so horrific and disrespectful. Obviously you expect a certain amount of ribbing but her friends had taken photos of quite a traumatic event for her and included them in a slideshow like it was a big joke.

You do that shit maybe at the bucks party or hen's night. You dont do it at the wedding.


*oh you said 21st, nm. Post still applies tho

 

[Gough]

She seemed to laugh it off albeit somewhat uncomfortably.

I think what made it worse is they didn’t just do speeches in one bunch, they were scattered throughout the evening. From memory there was bride, groom, grooms dad, grooms mum, brides dad, brides mum, maid of honor, best man, some random uncle and their priest/whatever. So the whole “she’s a virgin who is gonna get railed tonight” literally hung over the whole reception.

Also heaps of the speeches implied he was some sort of saint for abstaining for her as well.

It was just real cooked.

It's like Justin Langer in commentary, he seems to think the measure of a man is someone he'd allow to date his daughter. These Jesus freaks view women as little more than possessions.

 

[phantom13]

*and if it was my wedding.. which probably will never happen but anyway.. I'd have father of the bride, best man and maid of honor. That's it. No one else gets to speak.

Yeh from memory we did bride/groom combined, best man and maid of honor and everyone was given a 4 minute limit. Wifes parents didnt want to speak and my parents were never going to be invited to speak.

I walked out of my cousin’s 21st because the speeches were so horrific and disrespectful. Obviously you expect a certain amount of ribbing but her friends had taken photos of quite a traumatic event for her and included them in a slideshow like it was a big joke.

Jeeeeeesus, thats horrible.

 

[Gough]

I walked out of my cousin’s 21st because the speeches were so horrific and disrespectful. Obviously you expect a certain amount of ribbing but her friends had taken photos of quite a traumatic event for her and included them in a slideshow like it was a big joke.

I went to a twenty first where the parents composed and performed a rap about the guest of honour, it was brilliant, beyond cringe but brilliant.

 

[Shell]

Yeh from memory we did bride/groom combined, best man and maid of honor and everyone was given a 4 minute limit. Wifes parents didnt want to speak and my parents were never going to be invited to speak.

Jeeeeeesus, thats horrible.

I wouldnt speak at my wedding. To even have the wedding/ceremony in front of ppl would be enough for me.

 

[phantom13]

I wouldnt speak at my wedding. To even have the wedding/ceremony in front of ppl would be enough for me.

To each their own, it was important to us to thank a few people and also to ensure everyone knew how important it was to us that they were there.

 

[Shell]

To each their own, it was important to us to thank a few people and also to ensure everyone knew how important it was to us that they were there.

I would send thank you cards.


Nah I just reaaaally hate giving speeches. At my school they let everyone have a chance at speaking who leave. Yeah I won't be doing that. That will be my final gift to my soon to be former colleagues- not having to sit thru one more speech.

 

[phantom13]

I would send thank you cards.


Nah I just reaaaally hate giving speeches. At my school they let everyone have a chance at speaking who leave. Yeah I won't be doing that. That will be my final gift to my soon to be former colleagues- not having to sit thru one more speech.

Yeh thats fair, i wouldnt tell anyone how or what to do with their wedding day (although i would strongly advise a live band and cocktail, not sit down format).

I think because we had no parent speeches it seemed important to thank people also our ceremony was 15 minutes so the speeches plus that would have been all up 30 minutes for the whole night, seemed pretty resonable.

 

[Shell]

Yeh thats fair, i wouldnt tell anyone how or what to do with their wedding day (although i would strongly advise a live band and cocktail, not sit down format).

I think because we had no parent speeches it seemed important to thank people also our ceremony was 15 minutes so the speeches plus that would have been all up 30 minutes for the whole night, seemed pretty resonable.

Disagree massively on the band. Good DJ all the way. Agree with you on cocktail tho.

 

[MrsEddieBetts]

We had both dads speak and I did a speech, that’s it. We didn’t have a bridal party though so it was super quick and easy.

 

[phantom13]

Disagree massively on the band. Good DJ all the way. Agree with you on cocktail tho.

You’re allowed to be wrong. The band made the night, substantially better than any DJ I’ve seen (unless you count daft punk)

 

[Gavin Excell]

A good speech is like a mini skirt
Short, but with enough material to maintain interest

 

[Pistol Night]

A good speech is like a mini skirt
Short, but with enough material to maintain interest

“Thanks everyone that has travelled from a far and wide for Daryl and Karen’s special day, bridesmaids look beautiful, so thankful to be apart of your special day, Daryls batting way above his average (even if it’s obvious he’s not). Cheers

 

[Shell]

You’re allowed to be wrong. The band made the night, substantially better than any DJ I’ve seen (unless you count daft punk)

I'm not talking about a DJ who just presses play, im talking about one that can mix.

You are wrong and that's fine.