Analysis Whipping Boys - 2023 edition

[Markfs]

My sources have told me that Nick wont be back this year. The fracture in his leg is a fake and he is actually undergoing leg lengthening.....to make him about 2 metres tall and less susceptible to bullying.... This drastic procedure was decided upon after he was beaten up in his last game. See the attached story for details...

https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/beauty/cosmetic-surgery/influencers-regret-after-paying-225000-to-lengthen-her-legs/news-story/9c02e35d79ab690f9084af787712d277

 

[noideaatall]

That's what the Fly sycophants don't seem to understand. Like Hopkins, he was the most detested of "footballers" - a little weasel forward pocket. From Hopkins to Bewick to Milne to Ballantyne and Ginnivan they're the most hated players in the game and should be treated with extreme levels of mongrel at all times. But no, Fly is into protecting his own type and isn't even willing to get a mongrel like Bruzzy to rip their heads up - he helps them up after tackling them - FFS!

we cant ignore the modern ways, sr, although I agree with your sentiments. Judicious use of mongrel is the answer. We need the bruzzmeister playing on grand final day. As an example, the problem with Fab Phil was that he used his mongrel too soon. If I were Tommy, I would have had him caged up for the finals and only let him loose on grand final and point him at the kangaroos and tell him "Cull those Roos, Fabulous!!" I might have even got the local shaman in to concoct a potion for this forehead so it did the maximum damage.....

But the fly is a worry, especially when he sticks his tail between his legs and cozies up to michael voss on match days. When he sniffs Voss's butt it is downright degrading for our club. If we play them in a final, I think Voss will thump him into submission. Worse still, the Fly mightnt turn up on match day and brendan bolton will have to take over....i'll be burning next years membership card if that happens...

Geesus. You mob have no idea. Stuff like subtlety and irony just slips you by. Fly friggin hates Vossy. He doesn't sniff Voss's rectum, he shoves a large pumpkin up there while Voss is fluffing his hair in the mirror. Fly is like VP: here is a lovely flower for you to smell while I rearrange your behind. Talk to Mr Park. Watch Fly's interview post last loss. Bloke was two mm's from sticking the media reps nose into a grinder. You don't need to whip Fly, he is one of the tortured short people whose deep purpose is to bring pain to all those who failed to recognise his brilliance. There are a lot of people.

Fly is not our problem in terms of your beloved mongrel. WHE is. That's another story.

 

[sr36]

Watch Fly's interview post last loss. Bloke was two mm's from sticking the media reps nose into a grinder. You don't need to whip Fly, he is one of the tortured short people whose deep purpose is to bring pain to all those who failed to recognise his brilliance. There are a lot of people.

Was that the Press Conference where he started it by saying that he didn't believe in form and then finished it by talking about our rucks and how their form had dropped off but he felt they were our best combination when they were in form? Did he get concussed a lot in his career?

 

[Markfs]

Was that the Press Conference where he started it by saying that he didn't believe in form and then finished it by talking about our rucks and how their form had dropped off but he felt they were our best combination when they were in form? Did he get concussed a lot in his career?

Beautifully done. The fly is unravelling. This "relationship" thing that he's stuck on is like a worn-out 78 from my mother's frank sinatra collection. Probably in a similar vein, Frank sweet talked the bobby soxers for while during the period when he was doing well, but after he fell out of favour, he came back and all that sweetness had evaporated and he was dealing with women like they were hookers.

I expect a similar thing to happen to the fly as the team drops further into a hole and the fly morphs into his next phase. Which may be his redemption because he might then get bitter and twisted like all good coaches do and he'll start serving it to the players and pointing out the gutless wonders like the hyphen and the pin-up boy. And let me tell ya. I cant wait....

Geesus. You mob have no idea. Stuff like subtlety and irony just slips you by. Fly friggin hates Vossy. He doesn't sniff Voss's rectum, he shoves a large pumpkin up there while Voss is fluffing his hair in the mirror. Fly is like VP: here is a lovely flower for you to smell while I rearrange your behind. Talk to Mr Park. Watch Fly's interview post last loss. Bloke was two mm's from sticking the media reps nose into a grinder. You don't need to whip Fly, he is one of the tortured short people whose deep purpose is to bring pain to all those who failed to recognise his brilliance. There are a lot of people.

Fly is not our problem in terms of your beloved mongrel. WHE is. That's another story.

I dont know where you came up with this fly theory. Try to follow my lead and stick to the facts.

I'll tell you another wise story. Back in school there was this kid called claude fisacaro. We used to chase him around the school grounds at lunchtime and then get him on his back and make him pull up his t-shirt and we'd give him a "cherry belly". And then we'd make him thank us with a smile on his face......thats the fly.....that's his role.

I heard Julie McCreery rang him and berated him for not putting her son in the midfield...and he reportedly rolled over and put his arms and legs up in the air....

 

[Timmy from Thomastown]

Was that the Press Conference where he started it by saying that he didn't believe in form and then finished it by talking about our rucks and how their form had dropped off but he felt they were our best combination when they were in form? Did he get concussed a lot in his career?

You have formed a strong argument there

 

[noideaatall]

Was that the Press Conference where he started it by saying that he didn't believe in form and then finished it by talking about our rucks and how their form had dropped off but he felt they were our best combination when they were in form? Did he get concussed a lot in his career?

Beautifully done. The fly is unravelling. This "relationship" thing that he's stuck on is like a worn-out 78 from my mother's frank sinatra collection. Probably in a similar vein, Frank sweet talked the bobby soxers for while during the period when he was doing well, but after he fell out of favour, he came back and all that sweetness had evaporated and he was dealing with women like they were hookers.

I expect a similar thing to happen to the fly as the team drops further into a hole and the fly morphs into his next phase. Which may be his redemption because he might then get bitter and twisted like all good coaches do and he'll start serving it to the players and pointing out the gutless wonders like the hyphen and the pin-up boy. And let me tell ya. I cant wait....



I dont know where you came up with this fly theory. Try to follow my lead and stick to the facts.

I'll tell you another wise story. Back in school there was this kid called claude fisacaro. We used to chase him around the school grounds at lunchtime and then get him on his back and make him pull up his t-shirt and we'd give him a "cherry belly". And then we'd make him thank us with a smile on his face......thats the fly.....that's his role.

I heard Julie McCreery rang him and berated him for not putting her son in the midfield...and he reportedly rolled over and put his arms and legs up in the air....

You two. Jason, jason, jason. You are getting stupider by the post, of which there is way too many. Are you clones? You remind me of house flies that used to get up my nose in Mitre. You are on the home straight, finish line in sight. Do you flog the trainer? Don't be stupid, you strategically whip the horse. If I have to point out which horse we are riding at this point in the season it is time to find new jockies.

 

[sr36]

You two. Jason, jason, jason. You are getting stupider by the post, of which there is way too many. Are you clones? You remind me of house flies that used to get up my nose in Mitre. You are on the home straight, finish line in sight. Do you flog the trainer? Don't be stupid, you strategically whip the horse. If I have to point out which horse we are riding at this point in the season it is time to find new jockies.

Jesus. I didn't think it was possible. You actually know less about the racing industry than footy.

If you've got a horse like WHE who would struggle to win the last on the card in Ararat, yet a trainer who keeps running that horse in Group 1 races, you don't whip that horse - you shoot it. And you sack the trainer.

 

[Markfs]

I think we've agreed. we shoot the hyphen and whip the fly...

 

[noideaatall]

No, no, no but yes. Shoot the race caller and whip everyone. Or just banish the lot to Freo or Adelaide. Fate worse than death.

 

[sr36]

No, no, no but yes. Shoot the race caller and whip everyone. Or just banish the lot to Freo or Adelaide. Fate worse than death.

Yep send WHE to Adelaide. He goes missing so often that it will take years before anyone knows he's gone and by then the barrel of acid will have done its work.

 

[jmac70]

Yep send WHE to Adelaide. He goes missing so often that it will take years before anyone knows he's gone and by then the barrel of acid will have done its work.

WHE is very happy living in the beautiful Western Suburbs with his young family. His name is about to be written in gold.

 

[sr36]

WHE is very happy living in the beautiful Western Suburbs with his young family. His name is about to be written in gold.

I don't know how you do it in Victoria, but in SA we don't write their name on the barrel.

 

[noideaatall]

WHE is very happy living in the beautiful Western Suburbs with his young family. His name is about to be written in gold.

Yep, you got it. Second year in a row to win the memorial JB Award. Doubt lippy and DC can pass him at this stage. Not sure I would put the word beautiful and western suburbs in the same sentence tho.

I don't know how you do it in Victoria, but in SA we don't write their name on the barrel.

Yeah, you mob just put an x. I can recommend a good adult literacy class if you are interested.

 

[Sea fog]

Saw this on FB. Reckon some past skipper of the Pies would pose a bit differently.

 

[Markfs]

fetching, foggy....although he looks a bit fatigued around the eyes.

 

[Sea fog]

fetching, foggy....although he looks a bit fatigued around the eyes.

Better get some sleep before the finals.

 

[noideaatall]

fetching, foggy....although he looks a bit fatigued around the eyes.

The look is called smouldering. Wish he would just focus on setting the footy field alight. Foggy, stay away from fb, it will rot your brain.

 

[sr36]

Ok whippers, unless you are bulemic and actually want to throw up, don't go anywhere near The Age today. Our so called captain. What a ****ing disgrace. His intellectual wokeness has absolutely no place at a footy club. It's the antithesis of mongrel.

 

[Markfs]

Ok whippers, unless you are bulemic and actually want to throw up, don't go anywhere near The Age today. Our so called captain. What a ******* disgrace. His intellectual wokeness has absolutely no place at a footy club. It's the antithesis of mongrel.

SR, today's sunday.....hopefully you're putting on your sunday best and getting ready for church ....captain woke was in saturday's Age.

Darcy tells the world that he's a bit of a sponge. He's soft and soaks up punishment and then lies around wet and smelly on the kitchen sink...

 

[Markfs]

captain woke is now transitioning to his next career as a celebrity hairdresser......yup

 

[Markfs]

beware the enemy within.....and it should be noted that I have greater faith with Colleen but the brothers still havent taken the right of passage to mongrelness.....

Darcy Moore’s Mother Had Set Some Ground Rules​

After he joined Collingwood, his mother sat him down and had a talk with him. Jane gave some motherly advice and strictly said no to tattoos.

When asked about Collingwood players and the tattoos trend, Moore said, “My mum would definitely kill me. She would just, she would absolutely lost it.”

Most of the Collingwood players are covered with inks on their bodies; Dane Swan

Dane Swan

Age

40

Ht

185cm

Wt

93kg

Pos.

Mid

Career

Season

Last 5

D

26.9

5star

K

16.4

5star

HB

10.4

5star

M

5.9

5star

T

3.1

5star

CL

5.4

5star

No current season stats available

D

12.0

3star

K

7.0

3star

HB

5.0

4star

M

3.0

3star

T

1.0

3star

, Jamie Elliott, Travis Cloke, and so on.

It is hard to find a player with a “cleanskin” that wears black and white stripes. This might be the reason why his mother was so concerned about him and didn’t want her son to have tattoos.

 

[noideaatall]

You mob. I put up with this idea of whipping anything, rather than a traditional whipping boy but,ffs, you mob couldn't whip a dead dog on a highway. It is finals. You know, that whole new season, all bets off, winner takes all. Schizen has got serious, time to get real. Given you mob coudn't organise yourselves, let alone a shitfight in a dunny, I'm gunna step up.

Sr36, you deal with the past, god knows you are certainly not aware of what day it is. On that matter I will be in your god forsaken area earlier than expected. Brighton Caravan park all week before the grand final. Bloke without hair or teeth but with a truckload of kids and animals. Wear ya fighting rig mate, I remember everything.
VP, haircuts. Currently pretty much the whole team is a disgrace. Sort this Darcy look alike mess out.
Markfs, since you such a multi talented agrophobe, focus on photos and mothers. Neither should be exposed in public. You'd be an expert on that.
Seafog, not sure about you, bit of a follower, maybe you can focus on JDG and Crispy, keep em off social media. Keep their pants on. Fire em up, use a red hot poker if required.
Maggie5, ffs, take the curse off Darcy. Sacrifice your first born, or whatever. I don't care what it takes but just do something about that curse. I have a firstborn, would that do?
Timmy, you are are on rucks. If Maggie5 won't scrafice their firstborn could you do it for them please. Or sacrifice your own. Do something, teach Cox how to use two hands to mark.
Fat son of someone, sort out the poor excuses for upper lip growth. Markov gets a pass but I blame you for the pr0n and poor excuses on Ginni and Frammos lips. Get em a razor willya.
Gouki88, defense. Tell Frammo just cos he is FB doesn't mean he can't still star.
Ronnie, where are you? We need some of your agro to fire Maynard up.
Jmac, warm the bar up will ya. I have a date with some fine coopers pale ale Turdsday night.

I am headed for the desert a bit. Last time I was there was 2003 grand final. Not an omen. I leave it in your capable hands to sort this mess out. If not, I will be back after to sort you rabble out. You know it makes sense. Go pies, rub the demons nose, and all the members, into a pile of excretement.

 

[jmac70]

You mob. I put up with this idea of whipping anything, rather than a traditional whipping boy but,ffs, you mob couldn't whip a dead dog on a highway. It is finals. You know, that whole new season, all bets off, winner takes all. Schizen has got serious, time to get real. Given you mob coudn't organise yourselves, let alone a shitfight in a dunny, I'm gunna step up.

Sr36, you deal with the past, god knows you are certainly not aware of what day it is. On that matter I will be in your god forsaken area earlier than expected. Brighton Caravan park all week before the grand final. Bloke without hair or teeth but with a truckload of kids and animals. Wear ya fighting rig mate, I remember everything.
VP, haircuts. Currently pretty much the whole team is a disgrace. Sort this Darcy look alike mess out.
Markfs, since you such a multi talented agrophobe, focus on photos and mothers. Neither should be exposed in public. You'd be an expert on that.
Seafog, not sure about you, bit of a follower, maybe you can focus on JDG and Crispy, keep em off social media. Keep their pants on. Fire em up, use a red hot poker if required.
Maggie5, ffs, take the curse off Darcy. Sacrifice your first born, or whatever. I don't care what it takes but just do something about that curse. I have a firstborn, would that do?
Timmy, you are are on rucks. If Maggie5 won't scrafice their firstborn could you do it for them please. Or sacrifice your own. Do something, teach Cox how to use two hands to mark.
Fat son of someone, sort out the poor excuses for upper lip growth. Markov gets a pass but I blame you for the pr0n and poor excuses on Ginni and Frammos lips. Get em a razor willya.
Gouki88, defense. Tell Frammo just cos he is FB doesn't mean he can't still star.
Ronnie, where are you? We need some of your agro to fire Maynard up.
Jmac, warm the bar up will ya. I have a date with some fine coopers pale ale Turdsday night.

I am headed for the desert a bit. Last time I was there was 2003 grand final. Not an omen. I leave it in your capable hands to sort this mess out. If not, I will be back after to sort you rabble out. You know it makes sense. Go pies, rub the demons nose, and all the members, into a pile of excretement.

You are beautiful

 

[Markfs]

You mob. I put up with this idea of whipping anything, rather than a traditional whipping boy but,ffs, you mob couldn't whip a dead dog on a highway. It is finals. You know, that whole new season, all bets off, winner takes all. Schizen has got serious, time to get real. Given you mob coudn't organise yourselves, let alone a shitfight in a dunny, I'm gunna step up.

Sr36, you deal with the past, god knows you are certainly not aware of what day it is. On that matter I will be in your god forsaken area earlier than expected. Brighton Caravan park all week before the grand final. Bloke without hair or teeth but with a truckload of kids and animals. Wear ya fighting rig mate, I remember everything.
VP, haircuts. Currently pretty much the whole team is a disgrace. Sort this Darcy look alike mess out.
Markfs, since you such a multi talented agrophobe, focus on photos and mothers. Neither should be exposed in public. You'd be an expert on that.
Seafog, not sure about you, bit of a follower, maybe you can focus on JDG and Crispy, keep em off social media. Keep their pants on. Fire em up, use a red hot poker if required.
Maggie5, ffs, take the curse off Darcy. Sacrifice your first born, or whatever. I don't care what it takes but just do something about that curse. I have a firstborn, would that do?
Timmy, you are are on rucks. If Maggie5 won't scrafice their firstborn could you do it for them please. Or sacrifice your own. Do something, teach Cox how to use two hands to mark.
Fat son of someone, sort out the poor excuses for upper lip growth. Markov gets a pass but I blame you for the pr0n and poor excuses on Ginni and Frammos lips. Get em a razor willya.
Gouki88, defense. Tell Frammo just cos he is FB doesn't mean he can't still star.
Ronnie, where are you? We need some of your agro to fire Maynard up.
Jmac, warm the bar up will ya. I have a date with some fine coopers pale ale Turdsday night.

I am headed for the desert a bit. Last time I was there was 2003 grand final. Not an omen. I leave it in your capable hands to sort this mess out. If not, I will be back after to sort you rabble out. You know it makes sense. Go pies, rub the demons nose, and all the members, into a pile of excretement.

I presume that the pressure has got to you. Either that or the drugs....

It's good that you're going into the desert. I assume there's a magpie fan there who you want to harass. Good luck with that.

Once again, I'll remind you about what this thread is for. The JMac initiated it as a woke whinge about guys like the hyphen taking a heap of crap in the game day thread. WokeMac thought that the hyphen was copping it in lieu of others.......hint hint hint....this is why it is a whipping boy thread...

Since then, we established that the hyphen WAS actually a large part of the problem...as well as the other wimps who were woking it when they should have been going in hard and hurting opponents.

So you could say that this thread has taken an ironic bend in the road....we are now whipping the wimps that legendary woke king jmac, was trying to cuddle up to...

If you read the Age article on saturday about captain woke and his "discovery" that "wider things matter more than football", you would understand that by the time you have completed your 40 days and 40 nights in the desert avoiding temptation, the premiership will be lost because of the stench of wokeism infecting the playing group.

The curse of wokeism that infected brodie grundee in the covid days, has spread to his best mate and captain woke is now infecting the rest of the playing group while he gives them haircuts....As he proudly states in the article, he has infected 9 players with more to follow.

Let me remind you that IT WAS THIS THREAD that reminded people about the scourge of haircuts.....we tried to warn our fellow pie fans...but its too late now.

 

[jmac70]

I presume that the pressure has got to you. Either that or the drugs....

It's good that you're going into the desert. I assume there's a magpie fan there who you want to harass. Good luck with that.

Once again, I'll remind you about what this thread is for. The JMac initiated it as a woke whinge about guys like the hyphen taking a heap of crap in the game day thread. WokeMac thought that the hyphen was copping it in lieu of others.......hint hint hint....this is why it is a whipping boy thread...

Since then, we established that the hyphen WAS actually a large part of the problem...as well as the other wimps who were woking it when they should have been going in hard and hurting opponents.

So you could say that this thread has taken an ironic bend in the road....we are now whipping the wimps that legendary woke king jmac, was trying to cuddle up to...

If you read the Age article on saturday about captain woke and his "discovery" that "wider things matter more than football", you would understand that by the time you have completed your 40 days and 40 nights in the desert avoiding temptation, the premiership will be lost because of the stench of wokeism infecting the playing group.

The curse of wokeism that infected brodie grundee in the covid days, has spread to his best mate and captain woke is now infecting the rest of the playing group while he gives them haircuts....As he proudly states in the article, he has infected 9 players with more to follow.

Let me remind you that IT WAS THIS THREAD that reminded people about the scourge of haircuts.....we tried to warn our fellow pie fans...but it’s too late now.

Darcy be thy name, by Wokedom come they will be done, on earth as it is in Wokedom.

When our sweet 16th flag is delivered, you will walk the path of Woke Mark.

The Hyphen will await you in the promised land.