Toast The New Carlton Thread: inexperienced Collingwood winger to rule Carlton

[gouki88]

2:15 mark .

This is great viewing!

Sellers getting more jittery and edgy as it goes on is great

 

[stormskye]

Sellers getting more jittery and edgy as it goes on is great

It’s truly great viewing. And a true example of all Carlton supporters. It’s great knowing they thought they’d made the gf at quarter time. Fev had already booked his tickets

 

[Soups]

Where the bloody hell was Fev after quarter time?

He was lapping it up early just like he did all those years back with Bingle.

Speaking of bingle Fevola's head looks to have been in a few.

Aged as well as a dog turd on a lawn.

Face for radio that bloke

 

[JoinDate]

Can you get suspended for trolling via use of the love heart react?

Asking on behalf of my goldfish.

It's the Carlton board, you can get suspended for anything.

 

[manicpie]

I saw what you wrote on that Carlton game day thread yesterday Alf.

Worthy of a ban but I'll put it down to you eating some bad neighborhood pussy.

Made you delirious clearly.

I right about Carlton being the best possible outcome for us though. We would have smashed them, Brisbane is a completely different proposition

 

[Fadge]

Nah that was you guys.
We are playing them here.

One day they might learn how the finals system works...

 

[ElliottsMaggies]

'...almost bruise-free football...'

'...it's all unravelling now...'

Maher, McClure, Johnson - triple campaigner

Haha ..the only time Andy shuts the fk up is when they're losing

 

[The Royal Sampler]

It’s truly great viewing. And a true example of all Carlton supporters. It’s great knowing they thought they’d made the gf at quarter time. Fev had already booked his tickets

They thought they’d made it at 3QT against us last year too. Cue the reaper…

 

[Exambolor]

2:15 mark .

This is great viewing!

This is the five stages of grief, Andy Maher going nuts at the start and depressed at the end. Hoping Mick Molloy brings it up on the Front Bar this week haha

 

[Carringbush2010]

Post 697 on Carlton’s autopsy is

That poster is right, we MUST take advantage, bring home the cup and rightfully claim to be the all time no1 of this competition over the course of its history.

 

[Pistol Night]

It's the Carlton board, you can get suspended for anything.

They ban you for reacting to posts.

 

[Kirby]

What makes you think you would ‘smash’ Carlton. You’re not travelling as amazing as you think.. you’re one of a few good sides that have been in the mix like us, albeit you had a particularly strong first half of the year.. And I’m pretty sure we outplayed you guys last time if I recall

Brisbane are clear top dogs imo.. you will have chances though, need to maximise them and be at your absolute best to be a chance…

Your team just gave up a 30 point lead.

Of course we’d smash you. You are born losers

 

[Pistol Night]

What makes you think you would ‘smash’ Carlton. You’re not travelling as amazing as you think.. you’re one of a few good sides that have been in the mix like us, albeit you had a particularly strong first half of the year.. And I’m pretty sure we outplayed you guys last time if I recall

Brisbane are clear top dogs imo.. you will have chances though, need to maximise them and be at your absolute best to be a chance…

Clear top dogs? The only dickheads that keep sproutiung this are salty Carlton and Melbourne supporters for some reason. Every betting agency in Australia and rational oppo supporters have Pies slight favs or 50/50 game. Go back to your own board and jerk off over the "bravery"

 

[Pistol Night]

Your team just gave up a 30 point lead.

Of course we’d smash you. You are born losers

Carlton have won 72 hypothetical flags already this week after the loss

 

[manicpie]

What makes you think you would ‘smash’ Carlton. You’re not travelling as amazing as you think.. you’re one of a few good sides that have been in the mix like us, albeit you had a particularly strong first half of the year.. And I’m pretty sure we outplayed you guys last time if I recall

Brisbane are clear top dogs imo.. you will have chances though, need to maximise them and be at your absolute best to be a chance…

To win the flag from outside the top 4 you have to clear 4 hurdles. You failed at the third one, do you you really think you were going to be only the second team in history to achieve this? You were fooled by H&A form and were found wanting when it really counted. You are nowhere near GWS or Brisbane and most of all you are just plain stupid

 

[Chief Ten Beers]

They ban you for reacting to posts.

Can confirm

 

[riddick78]

It’s truly great viewing. And a true example of all Carlton supporters. It’s great knowing they thought they’d made the gf at quarter time. Fev had already booked his tickets

Yeah, the Bloser supporters i know were all quiet when they were losing, but when they were winning there were things left on desks at work, what they call "wellbeing" text messages, and you would think they were the only team in the AFL, they getting them to talk about any other game or team without it coming back to the Blosers.

I've been called a knuckle dragger, a thief, toothless, mocked because we gave up a 5 goal lead in the 2018 granny, well it could be worse, we could of given up a 5 goal lead in 1 quarter. All the while i remained quiet, i think pay back is in order.

 

[Pistol Night]

Yeah, the Bloser supporters i know were all quiet when they were losing, but when they were winning there were things left on desks at work, what they call "wellbeing" text messages, and you would think they were the only team in the AFL, they getting them to talk about any other game or team without it coming back to the Blosers.

I've been called a knuckle dragger, a thief, toothless, mocked because we gave up a 5 goal lead in the 2018 granny, well it could be worse, we could of given up a 5 goal lead in 1 quarter. All the while i remained quiet, i think pay back is in order.

One of my Carlton mates was trying to get GF tickets last week which i thought was humorous. I might hit him up today and see if he did happen to get some if i can grab them instead.

 

[Horaceg]

One of my Carlton mates was trying to get GF tickets last week which i thought was humorous. I might hit him up today and see if he did happen to get some if i can grab them instead.

I was going to question you on your mates but I have couple too, I want to not like them but I choose to blame their parents.

 

[WalterBlaknWhte]

Can confirm

Haven't copped a ban yet

I launched a thread on Brisbane's board several years ago about what they needed to do to become great again (as if I knew)

Copped some deserved fire

Then they started arguing amongst themselves and a mod closed the thread

 

[Chameleon75]

Haven't copped a ban yet

I launched a thread on Brisbane's board several years ago about what they needed to do to become great again (as if I knew)

Copped some deserved fire

Then they started arguing amongst themselves and a mod closed the thread

 

[Sweeetleftfoot]

Don’t worry at least Carlton is still the form team *

* from round 14 only

 

[WalterBlaknWhte]

Don’t worry at least Carlton is still the form team *

* from round 14 only

both Sydney and Melbourne would have won with accurate kicking

Carlton had a period of sunshine

which in hindsight, was really steaming bat piss

 

[left at home]

Read their autopsy thread
Great laugh so brave in an honourable loss, what a bunch of tossers

 

[76woodenspooners]

So here’s the mailout from Luke Sayers to the Carlton members.

Let’s have a look at it …

Dear Fellow Object of Collingwood Ridicule,

Truth be told, I did not intend to send this email until next Monday, such was the incredible belief I have in all this football club has become this year.

Off to an interesting start here. Bookmark this, because a bit later on we’ll be exploring concepts of humility

This week will be tough, there’s no doubt about that.

Watching Collingwood prepare for a Grand Final? Yeah, I’d expect so.

We set out to achieve a goal and to have that ripped away from us, it hurts.

“Ripped away” you say?

C’mon, Carlton jumped the start to race away to a five goal lead, and then stopped playing.

It hurts because we know that our best is good enough.

Good enough for what? You just lost a Prelim fair and square.

As enjoyable and unforgettable as the climb has been for our club, we know this is far from the end game.
We know we have more to give.

I do indeed hope you have more to give us to add to the two decades of joy.

Rest assured, we are a hungry football club.

Yeah, we smell what you’re cooking, we get it.

With true disappointment though, comes profound pride.

What we have shared together as Carlton people this year has been powerful.

Profound pride on display, it is indeed very powerful

We have shared experiences as a club that nobody can ever take away from us.

Whether that was a sea of Navy Blue rising as one to lift our side over the line, that incredible Carlton roar I can still hear ringing in my ears, losing our minds at every nail-biting triumph and jumping with family and friends, even hugging total strangers in delirium as we belted out our club song, arm in arm.

… forgot the bit about the shared experience of losing six games on the trot, plummeting to 15th, and the sea of Navy Blue rising as one to call on the coach to be sacked.

Hold on to those moments Fellow Object of Collingwood Ridicule. Those are the memories that you deserve to cherish forever.

Indeed. And so you should. It’s been 23 years since you last made a prelim. Who knows if or when you’ll see one again?

I wrote to you back in May asking for one thing, to judge our season once it had reached its end.

While ultimately we did not achieve the goal we set for ourselves, I sincerely hope that now you can be proud of your football club.

Should that be “… I sincerely hope that you can finally be proud of your football club”?

That you can walk down the street, or into work, or your kids head off to school well and truly proud to wear the Navy Blue.

Ah, yes.

As opposed to anytime over the last two decades?

2002, the first year your proud club ever won a wooden spoon in its history. Who’d have thought you’d then go on to load up on 5 in total over the next few decades, culminating in 2018 when Carlton heroically won both the men’s and women’s wooden spoons in the same season.

The turnaround this season was truly remarkable, …

This I absolutely do agree with, remarkable indeed

… however the most important thing was that it was built from something sustainable.

Wait, what?!?

How many times have you had false dawns over the last two decades? I’ve heard it all “‘can’t see how we can lose a game this year”, “lead us to our next Premiership”, “green shoots”, all only to end in insipid failure?

Maybe you might like to string a bit more success together over a longer period before you call time on 2 decades of putrid.

Does what we have achieved this season guarantee us anything for next year? No.

Hah, so much for “something sustainable”

However this football club now has real substance. We know what we stand for.

Will this be the 2024 Carlton slogan? “We know what we stand for”

A club built on its values; Unity, Humility, Respect, Excellence, Integrity and Relentlessness.

“Humility”?!?! From the bloke who “… didn’t expect to send this email until next Monday”?

“Integrity” from the club of brown paper bags and salary cap cheating?

“Excellence” from the club who have won five wooden spoons this century?

These encapsulate what it now means to be a Carlton person, …

Delusioned?

…and I want to thank you, our members, for embracing what our football club is striving to become, both on and off the field.

Amen to that

This season threw great adversity at us, and no doubt we will face adversity again throughout next season.

Adversity does not break this football club anymore though.

Adversity? Seriously WTF? You lost a bunch of football games because you were rubbish, how is that adversity?

We grow from it, it makes us who we are and we will continue to embrace whatever the football gods throw our way.

Invoking the Football Gods now?

How about your club start to take responsibility for its performances? Actually, don’t, may you remain rubbish forever.

We’ll stay present, stay humble and get back to work in November. We go again in 2024.

That “humble” word again. Do you even know what it means?

I’m bored of this nonsense …