I'm making a lot of assumptions, but you're not exactly proving any of them wrong.You're making an awful lot of assumptions.
I find that's what a lot of people do when someone disagrees with them. They'll just assume their motivation is sinister. They'll cast aspersions on their character. Anything other than to simply look at what they're saying.
Must be that I find trans people "icky" and don't really give a damn about the kids. Throw in must be right wing.
You might have your kitty litter thing to judge people by, but when people do the above, it's completely pointless discussing anything with them.
You believe a distinction between "cis" women and trans women is important? You say that like it actually means something. It's a completely ludicrous statement. One is a woman, the other simply isn't.
I don't care how trans people choose to live, most people don't. Just as most people don't actually believe trans women are women. They're just too scared to say so because they'll be labelled all sorts of horrible sh*t.
I've had these exact same discussions with all my right wing mates and family countless times. You all say the exact same things, it's incredible. So many free thinkers all come down to the exact same conclusion, right down to using the same made up scenarios (kids identifying as cats) and the same tired jokes (identifying as a helicopter). It gets to the point where you can make their next argument for them before they can.
Then you play the victim card, "oh boohoo I get called a nasty name ."
what do you think happens to looney lefties when we try to point out that there are observable differences in the brain structure of trans women that align more closely with cis wome than their natural sex? We get called brainwashed, woke, insane etc.
I've played a game with quite a few right wing people where I ask them to provide a definition of a woman that does not that have exceptions and they can't do it. Any concrete dichotomous definition will always end up including people they don't consider women, or exclude someone they do consider women.