Banter Dad Joke Quarantine Thread

[_VXV]

Why did the art thief's van run out of petrol?

He had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.

 

[davesnothere]

Any likes that post gets should be added to my tally (see post 1113)

Apologies

 

[Power Girl]

View attachment 1352612

I am such a shameless D Gen fan I will like anything and giggle ridiculously at any throwback to their material.

 

[wannabejack]

I just saw a car being driven by a sheep in a swimsuit.
It was a lamb bikini.

 

[bomberclifford]

 

[Grave Danger]

 

[Grave Danger]

Why doesn't Dodge sell any electric vehicles?

If they sold electric vehicles, they would have to give away a free Dodge Charger with each purchase!

 

[Grave Danger]

Can we ******* end the concept of daylight savings please

There's bugger all interest in it these days.

 

[Garibaldi Red]

I know it's a long shot but does anyone know what a trebuchet is?

 

[chiwigi]

I know it's a long shot but does anyone know what a trebuchet is?

I siege what you did there.

 

[philreich]

A redneck visits his wife in hospital. A staff member says to him, "Congratulations sir - your wife has just given birth to 5 big, healthy boys."

The redneck says, "I'm not surprised - my manhood is the size of a chimney."

The staff member says, "Maybe you should consider getting it cleaned - they're all black."

 

[Ford Fairlane]

 

[Grave Danger]

 

[philreich]

News just in that one of the streets near Buckingham Palace has been renamed "Prince Andrew's Close". It's not honorary - it's a warning.

 

[Grave Danger]

 

[philreich]

I thought I heard music coming from the printer last night. Then I realised the paper was jamming.

 

[Ford Fairlane]

 

[Garibaldi Red]

 

[Ford Fairlane]

Actual dad joke. Dad goes zing!

 

[Grave Danger]

Is that syrup on his head part of the joke?

 

[dirty2]

Actual dad joke. Dad goes zing!

Not so nice to short people but....

 

[Schulzenfest]

How to say the AFL's trickiest names

AFL stars tell us how to correctly pronounce their names

www.afl.com.au

Mitch Georgiades

19

Mitch Georgiades

Age

23

Ht

192cm

Wt

92kg

Pos.

Fwd

Career

Season

Last 5

D

11.0

3star

K

8.0

3star

HB

3.0

3star

M

3.0

3star

T

2.0

4star

G

2.0

5star

D

11.0

3star

K

8.0

3star

HB

3.0

2star

M

3.0

3star

T

2.0

3star

G

2.0

5star

D

11.0

3star

K

8.0

3star

HB

3.0

3star

M

3.0

3star

T

2.0

4star

G

2.0

5star

with a great contribution to this thread towards the end of this video

 

[Grave Danger]

 

[Ford Fairlane]

Why do bees have sticky hair?

Because they use honeycomb.

 

[Garibaldi Red]