Ha ha. Very good with the Bathurst jibes. I'm actually not a local but am here for the year, so you are not really striking bone.
You are right however with relating the homo stuff to Aussie Rules as far as Bathurst goes...around here they call it the 'GayFL', which is fairly ironic coming from supporters of a league where a player got busted shoving his finger up people's arses. That's the thing about leaguies, they constantly live in denial about their sexuality. Outwardly hetero but get them in close proximity to another man they bar up and go for the rear portal as quick as they can.
I'll think you'll find Oxford Street is in Sydney...isn't that the home of your competition? The place where girls can't get a root because most of the blokes are ****s. As for the percentage that aren't, they play Aussie Rules.
Your league guernseys look like an entire Mardi Gras all wrapped up and represented in a single shirt; they scream out the fact your game involves shoving heads places where nature didn't intend them to be - I imagine those scrums you have in your game are pretty much what happens on Oxford 7 days a week.
There is an obvious rainbow effect at work in your club's outfits; no doubt a lot of work has gone into them from the best male designers and fashionistas. Perhaps that is why Hopa lost it and his opponents copped it...the look of them transported him back to the Rugby League Float he was on that was heading up to the Sleaze Ball and he just had to cop a feel. It would explain why he did it with 15 cameras trained on him and in full view of a stadium of like-minded homosexuals.
As for our guernsies, the ones from the foundation clubs have been around since the days men were men and women were happy they were...our colours bleed tradition as compared to the johnny-come-lately glitz and glamour or your faggy outfits. I would not be surprised if the first innovation that league ever comes up with is next season when the NRL mandates every club's jersey has to have sequins in them. Don't worry, that is one innovation we are sure to leave as yours and yours alone.
Don't forget to bendover next time Hopa's about.
Good luck, you'll ****ing well need it with all these viruses about.
So you are fitting right in then.
Spiffing.