Autopsy Pies go down to Hawks 101-67

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This was a pretty disappointing performance from the Pies, and I don't want to make excuses, but out of all games this round, this one had the biggest gap in age and experience between the two sides.

Hawks were fielding 13 former Premiership players (we had four), and were just a smarter, more skillful and more battle-hardened unit.
 
I think a small part of the Collingwood heart-beat inside me died last night.

I should be feeling angier about this performance, but I'm not; instead I have the sober realisation that we remain crap. Even worse, we're crap in the same way we were crap last year, and the year before. Our crapness hasn't even morphed or evolved - it's remained the same. Our shitness has become herpes-like in that we can't seem to shake it. It might go away for a while, but is sure to return at some point.

Sorry. Rant over.

Understandable Mate
 
Gald im overseas
So were shit after years of this im just not finding watching footy that enjoyable anymore
 

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Two guys sitting behind me last night were whining about Buckley the coach. They got sucked into the rhetoric, and it was pathetic. I'm trying to watch the game, keeping the rain off me, while these idiots were busy sulking and condemning the coach. I felt like throwing them over the balcony. Here's the deal... it's gonna be an ugly start to the season because not til Anzac Day will the Pies be back to full strength, or the nearest to full strength you can expect as a Pies fan, with the return of De Goey, Wells & Greenwood to the midfield, and Fasolo & Elliot to the forward line. Until then, reserve your judgement. Round 1 always throws up bizarre performances, and the Pies were the epitome of that. Has Cox ever played with a wet ball before? Maybe not. I really don't think Cox has ever played with wet balls. They should put a hose on him at training. It's definitely incumbent on Cox to start practising with shiny wet balls. It's a rude awakening. Not a good time to play his worst game. He's mature enough to bounce back. Not till I saw the dew on the grass as I walked through the car park after the game did I realize why the players were fumbling all night. I hate night football. To think they want a night grand final. Good lord. Messing with a hundred years a tradition, just so it looks pretty on American televisions. Who gives a flying **** about the international audience? Oh yeah, Gil does. The only time Gil doesn't think about money is when he's asleep. And when he's asleep, well, you can guess what he dreams about. Not happy that the Pies were scheduled their bogey side for round 1 (only 1 win against the Hawks since 2011), and then GWS in round 2. Is it just me, or does the AFL delight in our downfall. That's it. That's my catalog of excuses. Now a word about the music last night. Queen One Vision. Stones Gimme Shelter. Mondos No Time. And of course acadaca. It amuses me that they chose songs that are lyrically relevant. Do these people even know who they're dealing with. The MCG crowd finds kiss-cam amusing. They're hardly cerebral enough to notice that the songs are lyrically relevant. Don't even bother. Here's a good play list for next week:

'What Is This Shit' by Archie Bell & The Drells
'I Can't Believe What I'm Seeing' by Grand Funk Railroad
'Be Glad You're Here Instead Of Watching 7' by Pink Floyd
'He Wasn't In The Protected Zone' by The Allman Brothers
'The Rules Committee Are A Bunch Of Has-Beens' by The Grateful Dead
'Katie Is Taking Gil To The Human Rights Commission And So Should You' by Joan Baez
'These Umpires Are ****ed' by Lynyrd Skynyrd
'Good Call Darc - Thanks Lingy' by All-Star Group featuring Boy George, Jimmy Somerville, Marc Almond, Holly Johnson, Rob Halford, Adam Lambert, Ricky Martin and The Village People
'ACDC Every Week Isn't At All Boring - I'm Just Preserving Their Legacy' by Tony Schibeci
 
Moments that matter!

1st half:
- Howe gives away silly free kick inside forward 50, Goal to Breust.
- Adams drops chest mark in front of goal that would have pushed Collingwoods lead to 2 goals.
- Bruzy Maynard streaming out of defence, kick smothered by Rioli, Hawthorne goal on the rebound. Bruzy could have handballed to Pendles or Pendles could have protected the ball carrier shepparding.
- Moore uncontested mark situation, ball slips through fingers to back of pack, Gunston crumbs and goals.
- Grundy panics in the goal square and pumps a ball straight to Mitchell. Mitchell pumps the ball straight back in, Grundy panics again 1m out from the goal line, hand balls instead of rushing, goal to Breust.
- Langdon slides at the ball collecting Gunston low, goal. Gunston in the replay possibly staged the fall!
- Langdon fires out a handball to Rioli who hits his team mate all alone top of the goal square, goal.

Commented at the time. The lack of composure was staggering. Absolute blind panic!
 
Two guys sitting behind me last night were whining about Buckley the coach. They got sucked into the rhetoric, and it was pathetic. I'm trying to watch the game, keeping the rain off me, while these idiots were busy sulking and condemning the coach. I felt like throwing them over the balcony. Here's the deal... it's gonna be an ugly start to the season because not til Anzac Day will the Pies be back to full strength, or the nearest to full strength you can expect as a Pies fan, with the return of De Goey, Wells & Greenwood to the midfield, and Fasolo & Elliot to the forward line. Until then, reserve your judgement. Round 1 always throws up bizarre performances, and the Pies were the epitome of that. Has Cox ever played with a wet ball before? Maybe not. I really don't think Cox has ever played with wet balls. They should put a hose on him at training. It's definitely incumbent on Cox to start practising with shiny wet balls. It's a rude awakening. Not a good time to play his worst game. He's mature enough to bounce back. Not till I saw the dew on the grass as I walked through the car park after the game did I realize why the players were fumbling all night. I hate night football. To think they want a night grand final. Good lord. Messing with a hundred years a tradition, just so it looks pretty on American televisions. Who gives a flying **** about the international audience? Oh yeah, Gil does. The only time Gil doesn't think about money is when he's asleep. And when he's asleep, well, you can guess what he dreams about. Not happy that the Pies were scheduled their bogey side for round 1 (only 1 win against the Hawks since 2011), and then GWS in round 2. Is it just me, or does the AFL delight in our downfall. That's it. That's my catalog of excuses. Now a word about the music last night. Queen One Vision. Stones Gimme Shelter. Mondos No Time. And of course acadaca. It amuses me that they chose songs that are lyrically relevant. Do these people even know who they're dealing with. The MCG crowd finds kiss-cam amusing. They're hardly cerebral enough to notice that the songs are lyrically relevant. Don't even bother. Here's a good play list for next week:

'What Is This Shit' by Archie Bell & The Drells
'I Can't Believe What I'm Seeing' by Grand Funk Railroad
'Be Glad You're Here Instead Of Watching 7' by Pink Floyd
'He Wasn't In The Protected Zone' by The Allman Brothers
'The Rules Committee Are A Bunch Of Has-Beens' by The Grateful Dead
'Katie Is Taking Gil To The Human Rights Commission And So Should You' by Joan Baez
'These Umpires Are ******' by Lynyrd Skynyrd
'Good Call Darc - Thanks Lingy' by All-Star Group featuring Boy George, Jimmy Somerville, Marc Almond, Holly Johnson, Rob Halford, Adam Lambert, Ricky Martin and The Village People
'ACDC Every Week Isn't At All Boring - I'm Just Preserving Their Legacy' by Tony Schibeci
Very amusing post. Thanks for the laugh.

Extra Points for adding Rob Halford to the Allstars.
 
After watching GWS today, you could just about add a zero to that figure
More the reason after today to pencil in a win rather than not. Not expected to win, GWS tails are up, we have our backs against the wall. Did it with Cloke two years ago in Sydney. Team that’s had it over us for years has been Hawks.
 
Two guys sitting behind me last night were whining about Buckley the coach. They got sucked into the rhetoric, and it was pathetic. I'm trying to watch the game, keeping the rain off me, while these idiots were busy sulking and condemning the coach. I felt like throwing them over the balcony. Here's the deal... it's gonna be an ugly start to the season because not til Anzac Day will the Pies be back to full strength, or the nearest to full strength you can expect as a Pies fan, with the return of De Goey, Wells & Greenwood to the midfield, and Fasolo & Elliot to the forward line. Until then, reserve your judgement. Round 1 always throws up bizarre performances, and the Pies were the epitome of that. Has Cox ever played with a wet ball before? Maybe not. I really don't think Cox has ever played with wet balls. They should put a hose on him at training. It's definitely incumbent on Cox to start practising with shiny wet balls. It's a rude awakening. Not a good time to play his worst game. He's mature enough to bounce back. Not till I saw the dew on the grass as I walked through the car park after the game did I realize why the players were fumbling all night. I hate night football. To think they want a night grand final. Good lord. Messing with a hundred years a tradition, just so it looks pretty on American televisions. Who gives a flying **** about the international audience? Oh yeah, Gil does. The only time Gil doesn't think about money is when he's asleep. And when he's asleep, well, you can guess what he dreams about. Not happy that the Pies were scheduled their bogey side for round 1 (only 1 win against the Hawks since 2011), and then GWS in round 2. Is it just me, or does the AFL delight in our downfall. That's it. That's my catalog of excuses. Now a word about the music last night. Queen One Vision. Stones Gimme Shelter. Mondos No Time. And of course acadaca. It amuses me that they chose songs that are lyrically relevant. Do these people even know who they're dealing with. The MCG crowd finds kiss-cam amusing. They're hardly cerebral enough to notice that the songs are lyrically relevant. Don't even bother. Here's a good play list for next week:

'What Is This Shit' by Archie Bell & The Drells
'I Can't Believe What I'm Seeing' by Grand Funk Railroad
'Be Glad You're Here Instead Of Watching 7' by Pink Floyd
'He Wasn't In The Protected Zone' by The Allman Brothers
'The Rules Committee Are A Bunch Of Has-Beens' by The Grateful Dead
'Katie Is Taking Gil To The Human Rights Commission And So Should You' by Joan Baez
'These Umpires Are ******' by Lynyrd Skynyrd
'Good Call Darc - Thanks Lingy' by All-Star Group featuring Boy George, Jimmy Somerville, Marc Almond, Holly Johnson, Rob Halford, Adam Lambert, Ricky Martin and The Village People
'ACDC Every Week Isn't At All Boring - I'm Just Preserving Their Legacy' by Tony Schibeci





Loved this post. Coxy and his shiny wet balls, the sulking (perfect word for it) and the song titles. You sir are a poet!
 
Now a word about the music last night. Queen One Vision. Stones Gimme Shelter. Mondos No Time. And of course acadaca. It amuses me that they chose songs that are lyrically relevant. Do these people even know who they're dealing with. The MCG crowd finds kiss-cam amusing. They're hardly cerebral enough to notice that the songs are lyrically relevant. Don't even bother. Here's a good play list for next week:

Thank God someone has reviewed the MCG music. My friend’s nephew used to be in charge of it. I passed on some suggestions a couple of years ago, but for some inexplicable reason they were ignored.:oops:
 

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Two guys sitting behind me last night were whining about Buckley the coach. They got sucked into the rhetoric, and it was pathetic. I'm trying to watch the game, keeping the rain off me, while these idiots were busy sulking and condemning the coach. I felt like throwing them over the balcony. Here's the deal... it's gonna be an ugly start to the season because not til Anzac Day will the Pies be back to full strength, or the nearest to full strength you can expect as a Pies fan, with the return of De Goey, Wells & Greenwood to the midfield, and Fasolo & Elliot to the forward line. Until then, reserve your judgement. Round 1 always throws up bizarre performances, and the Pies were the epitome of that. Has Cox ever played with a wet ball before? Maybe not. I really don't think Cox has ever played with wet balls. They should put a hose on him at training. It's definitely incumbent on Cox to start practising with shiny wet balls. It's a rude awakening. Not a good time to play his worst game. He's mature enough to bounce back. Not till I saw the dew on the grass as I walked through the car park after the game did I realize why the players were fumbling all night. I hate night football. To think they want a night grand final. Good lord. Messing with a hundred years a tradition, just so it looks pretty on American televisions. Who gives a flying **** about the international audience? Oh yeah, Gil does. The only time Gil doesn't think about money is when he's asleep. And when he's asleep, well, you can guess what he dreams about. Not happy that the Pies were scheduled their bogey side for round 1 (only 1 win against the Hawks since 2011), and then GWS in round 2. Is it just me, or does the AFL delight in our downfall. That's it. That's my catalog of excuses. Now a word about the music last night. Queen One Vision. Stones Gimme Shelter. Mondos No Time. And of course acadaca. It amuses me that they chose songs that are lyrically relevant. Do these people even know who they're dealing with. The MCG crowd finds kiss-cam amusing. They're hardly cerebral enough to notice that the songs are lyrically relevant. Don't even bother. Here's a good play list for next week:

'What Is This Shit' by Archie Bell & The Drells
'I Can't Believe What I'm Seeing' by Grand Funk Railroad
'Be Glad You're Here Instead Of Watching 7' by Pink Floyd
'He Wasn't In The Protected Zone' by The Allman Brothers
'The Rules Committee Are A Bunch Of Has-Beens' by The Grateful Dead
'Katie Is Taking Gil To The Human Rights Commission And So Should You' by Joan Baez
'These Umpires Are ******' by Lynyrd Skynyrd
'Good Call Darc - Thanks Lingy' by All-Star Group featuring Boy George, Jimmy Somerville, Marc Almond, Holly Johnson, Rob Halford, Adam Lambert, Ricky Martin and The Village People
'ACDC Every Week Isn't At All Boring - I'm Just Preserving Their Legacy' by Tony Schibeci
Given the circumstances, don't agree with your hate for the Buckley haters, but liked your post and the song titles.
 
Two guys sitting behind me last night were whining about Buckley the coach. They got sucked into the rhetoric, and it was pathetic. I'm trying to watch the game, keeping the rain off me, while these idiots were busy sulking and condemning the coach. I felt like throwing them over the balcony. Here's the deal... it's gonna be an ugly start to the season because not til Anzac Day will the Pies be back to full strength, or the nearest to full strength you can expect as a Pies fan, with the return of De Goey, Wells & Greenwood to the midfield, and Fasolo & Elliot to the forward line. Until then, reserve your judgement. Round 1 always throws up bizarre performances, and the Pies were the epitome of that. Has Cox ever played with a wet ball before? Maybe not. I really don't think Cox has ever played with wet balls. They should put a hose on him at training. It's definitely incumbent on Cox to start practising with shiny wet balls. It's a rude awakening. Not a good time to play his worst game. He's mature enough to bounce back. Not till I saw the dew on the grass as I walked through the car park after the game did I realize why the players were fumbling all night. I hate night football. To think they want a night grand final. Good lord. Messing with a hundred years a tradition, just so it looks pretty on American televisions. Who gives a flying **** about the international audience? Oh yeah, Gil does. The only time Gil doesn't think about money is when he's asleep. And when he's asleep, well, you can guess what he dreams about. Not happy that the Pies were scheduled their bogey side for round 1 (only 1 win against the Hawks since 2011), and then GWS in round 2. Is it just me, or does the AFL delight in our downfall. That's it. That's my catalog of excuses. Now a word about the music last night. Queen One Vision. Stones Gimme Shelter. Mondos No Time. And of course acadaca. It amuses me that they chose songs that are lyrically relevant. Do these people even know who they're dealing with. The MCG crowd finds kiss-cam amusing. They're hardly cerebral enough to notice that the songs are lyrically relevant. Don't even bother. Here's a good play list for next week:

'What Is This Shit' by Archie Bell & The Drells
'I Can't Believe What I'm Seeing' by Grand Funk Railroad
'Be Glad You're Here Instead Of Watching 7' by Pink Floyd
'He Wasn't In The Protected Zone' by The Allman Brothers
'The Rules Committee Are A Bunch Of Has-Beens' by The Grateful Dead
'Katie Is Taking Gil To The Human Rights Commission And So Should You' by Joan Baez
'These Umpires Are ******' by Lynyrd Skynyrd
'Good Call Darc - Thanks Lingy' by All-Star Group featuring Boy George, Jimmy Somerville, Marc Almond, Holly Johnson, Rob Halford, Adam Lambert, Ricky Martin and The Village People
'ACDC Every Week Isn't At All Boring - I'm Just Preserving Their Legacy' by Tony Schibeci
Quality -Reading this on a new device, didn't realise I wasn't logged in but made the effort just to like this post.
 
Question is when? will I still be alive? How long do we continue to have this ridiculous belief, continue the same path and continue to disappoint with the same results year on year like we have year on year?
Honestly remove McGuire and a cascade of changes that should of happened after the 'so called review' will occur instantaniously! But it's wishful thinking..Ed's used by date had by far expired as el preso.
 
I also think we don’t or can’t execute a ‘plan b’.
When Cox isn’t taking grabs, what do we do?
WHen someone like Mitchell is accumulating possessions, do we just leave him or do we try to close him down? When omeara and Mitchell we’re getting it out of the square in the first qtr, we should have had Cox in there to give our guys first use. With his height he is always going to be superior to Grundy with hisbtap work.

One of our biggest issues is that we seem to be very one dimensional. Bucks makes the obvious changes (Moore to the forward line), but doesn’t seem to have the creativity like a Clarko moving Sicily to the backline.


i agree entirely and when we were getting beaten at the stopages it was on the outside. so just ask the players around the stopages to move outside 2metres minamizing getting beaten on the outside.. i definately agree but id put pendles to half back play sidebottom half forward move tralor to a wing . put adams back inside and if were going to go tall in the forwsrd line work out our most ferocious competitors and have 2 of them there to crumb and lock the ball in..

one thing i was happy about is we didnt get beaten out the back alot maybe once they got it over the top which shows we may have learnt from last season .
 
Some small positives -

Stephenson worked his butt off and showed glimpeses, same with Murray. Reid presented hard all day. Crocker had a reasonable day, and probably should have finished with at least 4. Sidey worked real hard and had a bit of impact for about 3 quarters.

Get's much harder for me after that.

For crying out loud! You find positives in that performance? What are you.......a loyal, real Collingwood supporter? Take a bow.
 
I thought this too. I lost count of the pushes in the back ("good body work") allowing a mark at the back that weren't paid. ( A couple were, which shows the umpires were seeing it but only acting on a token few.)
The AFL cry to keep the game moving is selective. Blatant holding up of play rarely receives 50m, (none in this game) but alight incursions at the side or on the mark are heavily scrutinized.
A team tactic of wrapping the arms around the body and making no attempt to dispose of the ball when tackled is apparently acceptable.

And then there is our team. The much vaunted midfield is in fact mediocre. With a winning ruck, we were killed in the middle. Sidebottom excepted, there was little purpose in the movement out of the centre by our side, and the biggest culprit was Treloar. He has all the attributes of a champion except the capacity to deliver the ball well, even when he has broken into space.
It was sad to see the collapse in Cox's confidence as the game wore on. He never gave up, but he just didn't believe he was going to hold those marks.
Varcoe may as well not have come.
Maynard was very disappointing.
Stephenson did better than I expected.
Murray was worth the price.

They outplayed us, and deserved to win, but the playing field was not level - the bar for free kicks to Collingwood is set so much higher. I entered this season with great hope, and it is all gone. It is not just one game, it is another game the same as many from the last few years. I don't subscribe to the view that Hawthorn were that good - we were that bad.
i agree entirely but i had a look today also they were at full strength we had i believe maybe 4 or 5 out of our best side..
 
Are you in the keep (last year) Pendles camp or trade him?
Geez tough question isn’t it. I’m in the keep camp but just not as the captain. He stuck with us when he could have went just like daisy. Out of respect and loyalty I want to keep him because he still can be a good player if fully fit. I think age is catching up quickly though but he has all year to prove me wrong. If he wasn’t captain he could just go out there and do his thing.

As bad as his disposal is, Adams at least would appear to have enough mongrel in him to tell Bucks where to go when he says he wants to pick Jarrod Blair. That’s what Pendles lacks at the end of the day, that edge or toughness.

Against his peers, Pendles has been a great asset to our midfield (particularly when he had partners in crime with good disposal) but compared with Hodge, Roughead, Selwood, Goodes, Ablett, Boak, Glass and McVeigh; Pendles is at the bottom of that list from a captains perspective in my book.
 
I think a small part of the Collingwood heart-beat inside me died last night.

I should be feeling angier about this performance, but I'm not; instead I have the sober realisation that we remain crap. Even worse, we're crap in the same way we were crap last year, and the year before. Our crapness hasn't even morphed or evolved - it's remained the same. Our shitness has become herpes-like in that we can't seem to shake it. It might go away for a while, but is sure to return at some point.

Sorry. Rant over.
Wait for it. Blair in. Missed opportunities, missed tackles, generally just missing to follow. Will do one good thing when No one’s paying attention and get picked again against the obvious. All the rest of the rinse and repeat will go on around it. Moore will eventually go forward the same way Reid stayed back all last year, somehow we will beat Geelong, not sure how yet because not sure Greenwood will be ready by then. We will be 1 and 7 or 2 and 8 something like that like last year. But the club will continue to try to ram merchandise down our throats at ridiculous prices and Buckley will be coach and Eddie will be protected. Oh man it’s going to be a long year.


I did have a wonder though about what it might be like on the other side post Buckley... Harvey, Sanderson, Boyd, Rivers, somebody somebody else. Who would be caretaker coach?
 
I wasn't on the board in 2005 when Collingwood was being flogged but I was certainly watching. We finished in 15th place with just 5 wins, fortunately ahead of Carlton. I can imagine the degree of frustration, disappointment and heartfelt anguish on these pages. Calls for Mick Malthouse to go would certainly be numerous. I don't wish to down play supporters disappointment at loosing on Saturday night but last year there were games when Collingwood looked coordinated, structured and even skilled. Games against GWS, Geelong, Adelaide and Melbourne were a few I recall easily. Sure we didn't win them all but they all showed the elements everyone wants to see.

I watched the 2005 team evolve into the 2010 team. Our list in 2010 contained 12 of the players that were pasted 5 years before (T Cloke, L Davis, A Didak , J Fraser, B Johnson, T Lockyer, H Lumumba, N Maxwell, S OBree, S Presigiacomo, H Shaw, D Swan), 8 of whom played in the GF. (Presti outed himself). My point is that there is a basis in the current list that the club is building on. In their wisdom, at the end of last year they chose to minimise the tinkering with that list. I've no idea what plans they have for the 2018 draft but I suspect one mega player wont do the job. One certainty is that players will go and strategic decisions will be made on who we need. No team always gets this right of course.

As disappointed as I was on Saturday night I'm not ready to burn the barn. There's a long way to go this season.
 
I wasn't on the board in 2005 when Collingwood was being flogged but I was certainly watching. We finished in 15th place with just 5 wins, fortunately ahead of Carlton. I can imagine the degree of frustration, disappointment and heartfelt anguish on these pages. Calls for Mick Malthouse to go would certainly be numerous. I don't wish to down play supporters disappointment at loosing on Saturday night but last year there were games when Collingwood looked coordinated, structured and even skilled. Games against GWS, Geelong, Adelaide and Melbourne were a few I recall easily. Sure we didn't win them all but they all showed the elements everyone wants to see.

I watched the 2005 team evolve into the 2010 team. Our list in 2010 contained 12 of the players that were pasted 5 years before (T Cloke, L Davis, A Didak , J Fraser, B Johnson, T Lockyer, H Lumumba, N Maxwell, S OBree, S Presigiacomo, H Shaw, D Swan), 8 of whom played in the GF. (Presti outed himself). My point is that there is a basis in the current list that the club is building on. In their wisdom, at the end of last year they chose to minimise the tinkering with that list. I've no idea what plans they have for the 2018 draft but I suspect one mega player wont do the job. One certainty is that players will go and strategic decisions will be made on who we need. No team always gets this right of course.

As disappointed as I was on Saturday night I'm not ready to burn the barn. There's a long way to go this season.
we tanked a game vs north in 2005 and landed Dale and Pendles as a result, then the next year we traded Tarrant for a top 10 pick so we had 4 top 10 picks in 2 years. We drafted two stud mids and both our key defenders in the 2010 premiership with those picks. We need to hit the drafts seriously hard from this year onwards.
 
The backwards sideways crap is still alive and well, would there be any danger of forward momentum and players positioned in positive attacking spots?
It is not even worth going into the semantics and breakdown of what is the wrong and how it can possibly be improved because we are watching a team performing the same as it has done under this fraud of a coach for how long now? Same suspects putting their hand up, same ones bobbing in and out of the game, and same disappointing group of 5 or 6 that go missing in bad results. I hope Pendles game was a one off because he looks like he's lost more than a yard of pace and he never was the quickest bloke.
 
we tanked a game vs north in 2005 and landed Dale and Pendles as a result, then the next year we traded Tarrant for a top 10 pick so we had 4 top 10 picks in 2 years. We drafted two stud mids and both our key defenders in the 2010 premiership with those picks. We need to hit the drafts seriously hard from this year onwards.
That Tarrant trade worked well - picked up Pick 8 (Ben Reid) and Paul Medhurst and then got Tarrant back for 2011 GF. Ironic that we now have Varcoe.
 
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